The One Where We Have BIRTHDAYS!!!!!!!!!!

[VictorianSqualor]

07 March: Ashton, a fourth child for gemprincess, 5lb 13oz @ 34+6
09 March: Ted, a second DS for Daftmoo, 7lb 14oz @ 36+0
21 March: George William, a first baby for KnitterintheNW, 7lb 2.5oz @ 37+3
25 March: Olivia, a second baby for TheMaskedPoster, 7lb 2oz @ 38+4
28 March: Pablo, a third baby and first DS for vacaloca, 7lb 14oz @ 39+4
28 March: Matteo Alexander, a first baby for Gangle @ 38+0 (?)
30 March: A baby girl, a second child for PortAndLemon, 8lb 15oz @ 39+5
02 April: Jak, a baby boy for rainbowdays, 9lb @ 39+1
02 April: A baby boy, a second child for bunyanvillas, 6lb 14oz @ 37+5
02April: Struan, a baby boy for Donnabels, 6lbs 15oz
02 April: A baby boy for mummyofaprincess @39 weeks
03 April: A baby girl for PippiCalzelunghe @38+2weeks
03 April: Aeryn Daisy, a baby girl for Denny185, 9lb 8oz @ 39+3
03 April: Benjamin, a baby boy for Micegg, 8lb 3oz @ 39+4
03 April: Roelof Grové, a first DS for SalLikesCoffee, 7lb 5oz @ 38+5
03 April: A baby boy for siikibam, 6lb 8.5oz @39+1wks
04 April: Matilda, a baby girl for AprilsFoolsBaby 7lb @
05 April: Ellis, a baby girl for MadameOvary, 9lb 12oz @ 40+6
06 April: Henry Peter, a baby boy for Sheds, 7lb 130z @ 40+4
07 April: Sebastian George, a fourth DS for Peachy, 8lb 4oz @ 41+1
07 April: Jack, a first baby for ThePFJ, 7lb 5.5oz @ 41+1
07 April: Lexie Bea, a fourth baby for babywhiting, 8lb 1oz @ 39+4
08 April: Alasdair, a second DS for bunnyrabbit, 8lb 5.5oz @ 40+3
08 April: James Samuel, a third baby for honeybee10, 6lb 7oz @ 37+2
09 April: Zara Mia Martin, a first baby for V1KK1M, 7lb 10oz @ 41+0
09 April: Jasmine, a baby gilr for Niceychops
11 April: Kyran for rdk, 7lb 13oz @ 38+3weeks
11 April: Sebastian James, a second baby for Fleecy, 10lb 2oz @ 40+4
11 April: A baby girl, a first baby for CeylonSapphire, 7lb 12oz @ 41+1
11th April: Florence, a baby girl for LouMoose
12 April: Maya Alice, a first baby for egyptianprincess, 8lb 15.5oz @ 40+3
12 April: Sophia Viviana, a second DD for AussieDivaonaBreak, 6lb 12oz @ 39+3
15 April: Alexander Oliver, a third baby for VictorianSqualor, 10lb 3oz @ 41+0
16 April: Ailish, a first baby for Mollyfloss, 6lb 11oz @ 40+3
16 April: A baby girl, a second baby for elfsmummy, 7lb 13oz @ 41+1
16 April: Zoe, a baby girl, a first baby for ToastAddict, 6lb 10oz @ 39+3
16 April: Jasmin, a baby girl, a first baby for Eggandketchup, 9lb 3oz @ 41+4
17 April: A baby boy for paranoidmumy, 8lb 9oz @ 41+4
17 April: A baby boy, a second son for lorisparkle, 7lb 12.5oz @ 41+6
17 April: Benedict, first baby for LadyBee 9 lb 3oz @ 41 +2
18 April: Millie Grace Jessamy, a baby girl for scorpio1 8lb 9oz @ 41
18 April: Cameron, a second baby for munchkinmum @ 39+5
19 April: Oliver Michael, first baby for bashboid, 7 lb 4 oz at 41 +3
20 April: Samuel, a first baby for Velbels. 8lb15oz at 41+1weeks.
20 April: Angharad Mai, 8lb 4oz, 40+6, first for 7monthsplus
20 April: Emilia, 7lb15oz, a first baby for SuzeM, 40+6
20 April: A baby girl for SushiMama
21 April: Eve, a second baby for OMaLittle, 8lb 4oz @ 39+3
21 April: A second DD for Monmoo
22 April: Sam, a second son for Soph73 @ 40+0
22 April: Molly, a first baby for EllieG, 8lb 8oz? @ 40+5
22 April: Daisy, second baby for AttilaTheHan @ 40 +3
22 April: Zoe Olivia, second daughter for Piccallilli2 7lb 1oz @42+1
22 April: A second DD for blinks.
23 April: Jessica Elizabeth, first baby for BabyBratt @ 40+1 7lb 12oz.
24 April: A baby girl, a second daughter for christmaspixie, 9lb 2oz @ 40+6/41+5
24 April: Miya Jade, baby girl for ShelleySare at 39+4
25 April: Amelie, a first baby for Dondons, 9lb, 41+3 (i think!)
25 April: Aisha, a second baby for Jaq39 7lb 14oz @ 41+4
26 April: Hope Olivia, a second dd for northeastmummy, 7lb 11oz at 41 .
26 April: Gabriel, a third child for Bainmarie @ 41+5
26 April: Eli Michael, a baby boy for LittleMissTurquoise, 7lb 15.5oz @ 40+5
27 April: a baby girl for Ayomi, 6lb 1oz @ 41+0
28 April: Jacob Andrew, a 2nd DS for Kaybeeand2boys, 8lb 4oz @ 41+5
29 April: Thomas Henry, a 2nd DS for TLSM, 7lb 8oz 40+3
30 April: Harry Samuel, a fourth ds for Chipmonkey, 9lb 5oz @ 39+2
30 April: Ellie, a baby girl for Annamama
30 April: A second DD for luckymummy74
01 May: Sophie May, a baby grl for Annieroo, 6lb 5oz @ 41+4
01 May: Euan George, a baby boy for Jenniejennie, 8lb @ 40+4
02 May: Robyn Olivia, a baby girl for soph28, 8lb 1oz @ 42+1
05 May: Nora Martina, a first baby for Eva07, 7lb 8oz @ 41+2
05 May: A baby boy for Beeper, 8lb 10oz @ 41+0
05 May: Gabriella Summer, a first baby for MommyHasAHeadache, 8lb 4oz @ 40+6
06 May: Wilf, 8lb 60z for bigbadmom @ 41+6
07 May: James Andrew, a second ds for Moominsmummy, 8lb 13oz @ 41+5
08 May: Ellie Isabella, a first baby for Carey87, 7 lb 8oz @ 42+1
08 May: Robin David, a 2nd baby for Woollymummy, 8lb 11 oz @ 41+3
09 May: 4 kittens for scorpio's cat!
10 May: Astrid Mary, a second dd for TheShipsCat, 8lb 8oz @ 42+0

I'm gonna tip the scales here Scorpio, but please don't take offence.

I don't think it's fair in the slightest to expect him to put you and the new baby before Zac, which is what it sounds like you want when you say "IMO as his first thought should be our new baby, my health after birth and getting BF sorted."

All his children, born yet or not, should be of completely equal priority, imagine how you'd feel if you ever spilt up (which I don't imagine will happen for a second, but bear with me) and he said he couldn't have any of the children you've had over Christmas because his new partner was pregnant.

He should do EVERYTHING he can to make sure every one of his children has Christmas with him, it's not like any of the others are going to be sent away when you're due so, really, Zac shouldn't be either.

HOWEVER, what he CANNOT expect is you to look after all of the children alone, whether Zac is there or not, so he should be seriously considering his work/play commitments and start supporting you properly and tbh, knowing you, I expect(?) that Zac isn't actually the problem That you're finding it really fucking tough at the moment and he isn't giving enough help/support and zac is just the straw that broke the camel's back, so to speak?

Good point VS.

So, are you suggesting, what with my EDD being Xmas day and i went over with dc3, that DH goes to get Zac on the 27th as normal, considering my last 2 children have been born in under 4 hours. Then add an extra child into the post birth chaos.

Fuck that. Thanks.

No, I'm suggesting that Zac should still be able to come over, whether DH drives the journey to get him or not isn't what's important but that Zac can come still is.

Zac shouldn't be seen as an 'extra child'. He is your husband's son, brat or no brat and as his Father DH should do everything he can to ensure that all his children can be with him at christmas.

Time to go home. Have good evenings everyone. Love ya all xxxx

The difference though is that Zac does have another parent who he can be with on the day, surely? It's nto as if he'll be without a aprent, and I don't think him driving to Zac's home si wise around that time, as it really is a distance.

Quite agree that the kids amtter equally but that doesn't mean everything ahs to be exactly the same for all of them; and what happens to Zac if Scorpio is rushed to hosital or the baby needs SCBU? TBH I'dpostpone Christmas entirely in favour of something either side of the season and a very basic day (M&S ready prepared food and that's about it) as chances of it being anything other than either a nappy changing festival or a time for Scorpio to rest is unlikely.

If the others came in under 4 hours there's every likelihood that this one will be far quicker- 4th babies often are. Will Zac want to be in the house duruing what is absically an emergency? Indeed it'd be better if the toher kids were elsewhere, the difference is AFAIK they don't have another settled caring home.

Absolutely this is mainly about a lack of support and I do think a bit of respect, but there's basic practicalities- such as disposing of 4 chidlren during a very fast lanbour and the rpesence of another child just complicates everything

Hey scorp, are you ok?

Thinking of you Scorp

FB me if you want a chat later (am taking 5 kids to the farm today so not about until later then off to Pembrokeshire tomorrow)

XX

Afternoon all. Everyone OK? Scorpio - where are you lovey???

Came here to have a rant about DH.

Am now just concerned that you're ok, Scorpio. Where are yooouuuuuu?

Knitter - what's up?

Ugh - He's just seriously p'ing me off. He does nothing without being asked to do a specific thing (that old chestnut still...)
I popped to asda last night to try some clothes on, and when I got back he was still lying on the sofa watching TV, the kitchen hadn't been touched. I did some huffy clearing up and then he announced he was going to bed. I couldn't actually speak to him and needed to calm down before I could go to bed. I decided I was going to sleep in the spare bed because I knew if I was next to him I'd just be fizzing with anger all night and get no sleep. He pointedly didn't speak to me this morning. Def time for a chat tonight now!

We'll have to speak anyway, our offer on a house got accepted just now, subject to completion in 14 days!

Knitter - oh dear, I hate it when my DH does things like that. Fortunately it isn't very often and he gets the hint when I say things like "nice to see the washing up fairy came in while I was out."

Congrats on the house btw.

Right, I'm off. Have good weekends everyone. Scorpio, please pop in so we know you're OK. Knitter - hope you sort him out

Bye xxx

Hi ladies,

VS I went off to work this morning mulling over what you said and I think that in theory it's right, but if it were me on the receiving end, there's no way I would think like that.
But then I guess that's it, Scorpio has to do what is right for her and her children.
Scorpio's DH has to do what is right for him, and his children. It's the doing right for each other that's tricky, and it sounds like Scorpio does an awful lot of putting DH and what's right for him in front of herself and needs to see DH putting her first a bit more.

As does Knitter. What is it with all these DHs, why don't they see that they need to be kind to their DWs a bit more? Grrr.

Message to DP/DHs everywhere. Be kind. Now.

Good post, Ladybee.

What gets me is that it sometimes happen that the nicer a woman is, the more she has to do. That's not right.

(Sadly for dh that's not me - I'm a lazy slattern, me. )

Knitter, hope your talk went well.

Scorpio, I promise I won't ask again, but just want to know if you're ok. Please post update if you get a chance, I'm a little worried. xxx

MAybe LadyBee, but once a step-family distinguishes between 'your children' and 'my children' it's bound to end in heartache for someone, usually a child, and I remember this soooo much from when I was growing up. The adults would be arguing amongst themselves who was gonna go where and us children would be stuck in the middle, with one or other of us feeling incredibly unwanted. I just think everyone needs to realise there is a child stuck in the middle of this being told he can't go to his Dad's as planned because there is a new baby coming. Children don't see things the same way we do, and as much as I'm sure Scorpio isn't trying to hurt him, it will be.

Peachy, you say Zac has another parent to be with, so does Scorpio's eldest but he isn't being sent to his Dad's, if he were then ofc it would be completely fair to say that the two eldest children who had other parents they could be with were going to be elsewhere because of dangers/complications/practicality etc but, IMO, when it is just one of the children having their Christmas plans changed then it's unfair.

Anyway, this is all hypothetical, it's not any of our decision to make, I just wanted to give another view to what was being said. Just because it may not be what I personally agree with doesn't mean I don't care so come back and carry on talking Scorpio, hopefully my posts will just show you it a bit from DH's angle.

Scorpio's not saying that Zac can't come ever again is she though, just that at the minute she's pg and tired and can't really cope with an extra (difficult or not) DC, and Xmas speaks for itself IMO, she'll be giving birth at some point, and the new baby won't give two hoots if it's a convenient time or not! If they're going to have a Zac-included early xmas/birthday celebration, he won't miss out. Agree that each child is as important as the others, but in circumstances like these the rules need to be bent a bit for everyone's sake. (That's what I think, anyway.)

Ended up not having 'that' chat with DH last night, but he did make a point of going to clear up the kitchen and put the dishwasher on, so we'll see if the hint has finally been taken!

My mum and dad are arriving tomorrow for a stay, so might not be on quite as much. Will def pop in at some point every day though.

Ooh, we only have a few posts left... What shall the new thread be called?????????

Again, an 'extra' DC.

Well yes, but I meant in the sense that he's an extra DC on top of the ones that Scorpio's already struggling to cope with. Just meant that if 3 are hard work, 4 will be harder. Doesn't matter which child you decide is the 'extra' one.

New thread here.