February 2011- the one where life gets better for all of us.

[GOLDdebka]

New thread open for business!!

I am anticipating MUCH weight loss, job improvements, sleeping babies, good health and one very eagerly anticipated BFP. :)

[ledkr]

Thats my drug of choice blizy. Its prozac. Very effective and well used. You may fell tired and a bit sick for first two weeks so take it at night x look up ssri drugs on the net

[MizK]

Evening darlings, sorry I suck at keeping up at this MNing lark.

blizy no experience with ADs but I reckon it'll be pretty good if our ledkr recommends... she is the authority on these things. Hopefully they'll sort things out for you x

deb sorry to read that you've been struggling with DH. I am far from the person to advise on romance but I may have said before, I wanted to leave my ex for a long time but was just so scared - of how I'd cope, how the children would feel, how he would feel. We both since met the people we were supposed to be with - I honestly couldnt compare my relationship now to my last one - in a real sense, not hearts and flowers, I am completely happy and know we are going to grow old and cranky together! If you can say that about your DH then just keep at it. You do deserve to feel loved though (and to get laid, to be perfectly blunt.)

ledkr hope you have recovered from your rough night x

Gaaaah I forgot everything I read on the first page! Hello to everybody and I promise to be better at posting.... still adjusting to student life, its v fun but little time for MN :) Off to enjoy a rare night alone in the house, going to watch Twilight to see what all the fuss was about, I've beeen told that its so shit its actually funny....

[wigglesrock]

blizy it was my drug of choice too Just generic Prozac as ledkr said - knackered me at the start too, but was a help after the first few weeks. Well something worked - am assuming it was the drugs Just put me on an even keel, helped me get focused - I used it for just over a year, I think. xxxxxxxxxxxxx

ponyo the group was good, food feckin' brilliant Hope you have a lovely weekend.

reastie fingers crossed - things might be a changing

Anna's in a single bed tonight - Mr W dismantled the cot and put the spare bed in (not even a slight wobble from me )

MizK Enjoy Twilight - I watched it - expecting it to be pure shite - I really enjoyed it I must be old I fancied the pants of her Dad

[blizy]

Thanks for the advice girls, it knackers you eh? Let's hope it helps me sleep then!

Wiggles- Anna in a big girls bed now, sheesh these babies are growing up too fast! Defo showing your age fancying bella's dad !

Mizk- I heart twilight (but I'm a saddo) can't wait until the new film is out.

I will start the ad's when I'm feeling better, I have a tummy bug just now (yuck). Right im off to stare at the ceiling some more- try and sleep...... Hope all the babies are fast asleep.

[reastie]

I quite liked twilight too mizk in a guilty pleasure type of way but think wiggles must be getting old re: fancying her Dad

blizy - hope you feel better soon, glad you've got the prozac. I took it years ago but don't really remember much about it so can't help much

deb how's your sister?

I'd be suprised if Alice slept 3 hours last night, and she refused her nap yesterday afternoon too . She looks like she's getting a cold so maybe that's why. I am shattered though!

[ledkr]

reastie thats how d was.her cold is horrible but she slep well last night thank god.
wiggs Big bed. Blimey you dont hang abojt do yoh?
Dilly wont be leaving her cot for sometime yet her sleeping is too unpredictable.
mizk good point re getting laid that would be deal breaker for me.

[reastie]

A q for those with older DC - what age do they stop using plastic tablewear and use normal china to eat on at meals? It's just I bought <a class="break-all" href="//www.amazon.co.uk/Emma-Bridgewater-piece--Dancing-Mice/dp/B001GC9M78/ref=sr_1_1?ie=UTF8&qid=1348916235&sr=8-1&tag=mumsnet&ascsubtag=mnforum-21" rel="nofollow noindex" target="_blank">this for a friend of mine who is expecting another DC for a present when they are born as I was convinced she was having a girl....turns out she's having a boy! [too organised for own good]. So I'm wondering if her DD will be too old to have to for christmas - she'll be 2.5. If children generally progress to normal plates etc at 3 then I won't bother I'll keep it for Alice but if a 2.5 YO will get a couple of years worth of use then I will

wiggles Alice has been in a big bed for maybe a month now. It's worked so far well for us - she has the luxury of a double bed to herself

ledkr it's tiring isn't it! DH has gone out for the afternoon so I'm home alone with a vveeerrrrryyyyyy whiney DD - even cbeebies isn't working .

[GOLDdebka]

Hey everyone,

exapt sorry to hear you have relationship woes too. I don't blame you for keeping quiet about it all. Much love xxx

wiggles and reastie S is in a cot and will be for a while yet, will be a major reshuffle to try and fit another bed in the girls' room.

reastie bloody hell, 3 hours you poor woman :( Sstill isn't interested in TV (damn her), so you're one up on us at least there! That set is adorable! My 2 both use normal cutlery and crockery already, but only because I'm too cheap to buy special stuff

blizy v glad to hear you have some treatment, I hope it starts working quickly. I can't imagine suffering from long term insomnia.

ledkr it's not a deal breaker atm but I can see it becoming one. I have the implant which makes my libido practical zilch which I hated to start with but now it kind of suits us :(

My sister is doing a bit better I think, she been at my mums A LOT, or my mum's been at hers which I think has helped. My other sis is struggling now (sigh), her DD (2mo) is not sleeping due to her first cold. Her DH is working and studying so she's coming to me this afternoon. Then I go to work- CAN'T WAIT!!

[blizy]

Oh Debka- I'm sorry your sisters are having a hard time, fwiw I wish my sisters were as supportive as you. They are very lucky to have you.

Wiggles/ledkr- is it ok to have a couple
Of glasses of wine on the fluoxetine? I have a wedding next sunday, I would like to partake in a couple of wines (I won't be having to much, just 2 or 3).

I am really worried about my friend, he was sent to hospital after an eye exam at optician with pressure/swelling on her brain, she is waiting on ct scan and lumbar puncture results. send her some good vibes please. X

[Grannyapple]

Ooh blizy sorry about your friend....hope u've heard back now? Lots of good luck vibes your way mrs x

Been out 2 nights on the trot this w/e ... v rare indeed! Had a whole bottle of wine last night (wedding reception) so feeling it a bit today, little N blessed us with a lie in until 8.20...again, unheard of!

debka hope both sisters get through everything ok. As blizy says, they're v lucky to have you.

ledkr hope D is on the mend & finally getting back to decent sleep pattern. Same for you reastie, oh & how exciting about poss job change!

Waves to wiggs emski expat ponyo & everyone else I may have missed.

[ledkr]

Bollox just lost a post. Ill summarise.
Drinking on prozac may make you extra pissed or sleepy. I do but no surprise there i guess
Another weekend on my own so went to a car boot with girls. D wore jeans boots a beany hat and a cagoule and looked like a gallagher brother

Just need a quick poll. Please be blunt.
Mil has been tryiong to get us to go on holiday with them since I can remember. We havent as we prefer our own holiday and cant afford two.
She has now cleverly manipulated the situation and arranged a holiday to their time share which is a lanzarote sporting holiday She has said they will pay for the accom but not flights and it is for fil 60th. I was initially ok with this (cheap extra holiday) but now we cannot get flights for under 250 each and that is before they add all the other bumph airport taxes baggage etc plus insurance and transfers. Then we will have to have spending money and food for 4 of us basically making it a very expensive week. Dh thinks we can afford it and still go away in the summer on our own but I think this is ridiculous. We could spend the money on many other things that we need and I dont want to cane about four gran on holidays in a a year.
Its not as if I will enjoy it.They exercise form 8am till night time so Ill be stuck with the kids all day and its not even that nice it looks about 2-3 star tbh.

Do you see my point? Id be prepared to put up with it if it was cheap but not pay all that to go somwhere I dont want to.

I get fed up with all this,i think dh would be better married to a younger more pliable girl who wants all this hanging about with pils.
We will have the stupid sisters abroad wedding to fork out for too sometime soon

I told him to go on his own and id have a holiday with the girls in august,take them to Dubai and stay with my friend. He swore at me

Nb Ella wil also have her residential trip the week before or after so thats another reason I cant do it.

[reastie]

ledkr honestly you sound like you're completely making the right decision not going IMO. I think you show great will to actually be willing to go in the first place! If PIL don't understand the reasons why you will choose not to go they are being completely unreasonable. It's very nice of them to offer to pay for accommodation for you but £250 each for flights is an awful lot - you could do a complete family holiday on your own for that much , plus, theres always extras you pay for once you're there like food/drinks/tourist tat/etc etc. Maybe you should suggest next time they pick somewhere you can get to on your camper or maybe you'd rather not mention the possibility of a future holiday in any case . I am a younger pliable girl btw and I'm not putting up with lots of hanging out with PIL so don't think that about yourself. If DH is so desperate to go would he go on his own or take D (assuming you don't have to pay full wack for her...and you may, I have no idea). I think have another chat with DH and try explaining that it's not as you don't want to go on this holiday with PIL there are very obvious reasons why it's not practicable to go - leave personal feeling aside. Sounds like it would be alot for Ella to have too, especially how great not PIL are with her. Btw meant to say, apparently SIL/BIL are having problems with their DD who is 10 and how she's getting teenagery and generally hard to deal with - maybe it's their age?

granny 2 nights out in a row eh? What a party animal

blizy hope your friend is OK - keep us updated.

deb hope both the sis' are OK soon enough.

Gym today for me and lots of cooking - made a fruit loaf, big roast dinner for DH and Alice, tofu bake thing, pea and mint soup in the freezer and carrot, ginger and orange soup for me for dinner. I realised that I've nearly lost the weight of Alice since I joined the gym - she is very heavy

[ledkr]

well done reast and thanks. It does help to be told ianbu. I cant help thinking that this is a another of mils manipulations tbh and what a great idea to suggest they could have done the camper thing.
I did look on line too its called La Santa btw, You should look it looks like my idea of hell haha,i almost wish I could go so that I could laze about all day watching them over the top of my sunnys whilst drinking from a bottle and puffing on a holiday fag ab fab stylee as they jog past me.

Reastie are you dieting too or is it just the gym that has shifted the lard??
I have done lots of cooking too today,shepherds pie,bread,flap jacks and Nigellas Nutellea Cheesecake. I then knocked up a batch of slimming world coleslaw. Oh the irony

[blizy]

Ledkr- I shall allow myself a few glasses of wine . I don't think you are being unreasonable either, I agree with reastie. I hope you can sort it out with Dh. I would
Hot go on holiday with my inlaws or parents, my idea of utter hell.
Nutella cheesecake sounds yum!

[wigglesrock]

blizy I had the odd drink as well, tbh I wasn't up for going out that much then but you should be fine

ledkr Nope, Nope and thrice Nope I wouldn't go. Nothing would jeopardise the idea of a holiday with dh and the girls for me. And I went away with my parents a few years ago solely because it was a cheap holiday and it really did cost us nothing. My parents paid for villa and I think the flights cost us all about £200. But more importantly its your idea of a feckin' nighmare. Oh Olivia wore the coolest beanie today from H&M - she looked like a cross between a Gallagher and Gwen Stefani

reastie Well done. I've met a few people recently who have told me how much weight I've lost I feel like I've lost weight, I think I've rediscovered my collar bones, not to mention hip bones and my clothes feel a lot looser but if I get on the scales I haven't lost an iota

grannyapple hark at you - living the high life - I'm not even going to discuss the lie-in

Well after twenty years of avoidance - it happened I bumped into a girl I went to school with who told me about a school reunion in 2 weeks, unfortunately I'm double booked and out for dinner for friends 40th (yes another one ) Actually she was lovely and it was a nice catch up but I was thanking my lucky stars I'm not on FaceBook, although am now dying for a nosy

[reastie]

wiggles so you don't lose a lb but people keep telling you you've lost weight, I lose nearly 3 stone this year and not a single person has commented [sigh] . Btw you could always join facebook just to nose at other people - you don't have to write stuff up there about your exciting life

ledkr I wouldn't say I'm on a diet as such, I've cut down how much I eat though for sure and not really eating anything naughty. I've started having a main meal at lunch (usually a rice or quinoa and tofu/vegetable salady thing when at work) and soup for dinner rather than main meal in the evening. It's the gym that makes the difference with me though I think - it always has, that's why I think I failed before. I still feel very fat though but am only just over half way to pre preg weight.

I'm having a few problems with DH and his 'anger' issues recently. He finally admitted how he behaves isn't on and there is a problem, got himself a CBT anger help book and is reading it but if anything I think he's got worse over the past few weeks. Over the past 3 weeks he's shouted (as in really really shouted v aggressively not just shouting like in an argument type) at Alice as she won't go back to sleep with him at night at least weekly, he's kicked the stairgate in and thrown boxes around the loft whilst shouting and swearing so hard a bit of the plaster (which was only replastered 2 years ago) fell off the ceiling). He used to just lose it very rarely and then straight after he was completely back to normal (like he needed to get it out of his system) but now he's still angry after he shouts/kicks/breaks things too. I'm actually quite itchy about it. If I mention anything he either refuses to talk about it or says he won't instantly get better. I don't know how to deal with it with him and what to say to him about it. I'm worried now he's accepted he has a problem it'll get worse as he will just blame it on the fact he has this issue. I'm feeling sad as I know if he doesn't improve then I will not put up with it forever and I will have to split up with him . Sorry for a miserable start to Monday. I just wanted to share as I haven't told anyone in RL and don't really want RL people to know what's going on

[blizy]

Reastie- I'm glad he had realised the behaviour is not on. Will he consider counselling or anger management classes? I really feel for you about this, I hope
He sorts himself out for all your sakes. X

Wiggles- I still see a few old school friends, infact I childmind for 3 of them!

Nothing interesting for me to report, i hope you all have a good Monday.

[reastie]

Thanks blizy . He is very resistant to go and see anyone and admit to anyone else he has a problem, so we shall see.

Alice just trying on all of my necklaces at the same time and then putting them neatly in her potty (it's clean btw obv) and then doing the same again!

I'm testing a recipe this week end for mn for the new mn cookbook - they've given me 'ice cream extravaganza' or some such - looks delish. I have to take a picture of the finished product - I'm wondering if it's so they put some of the piccies in the actual book, so think I might try extra hard to make it look half decent!

[reastie]

Helloooooooo

[wigglesrock]

Why Helloooooo reastie how has the start of the week been for you?

All good here, O started Irish dancing after school today, she loved it, so both S & O are in until 4 on a Wednesday - hello life, its me, I think I might be getting you back

A is in great form, nattering away, demanding biccies and buuks (books) usually together all the time.

[tadjennyp]

hello, thanks for the new thread deb! I have been crap at keeping up lately as my dps were here for 3 weeks and we're just getting back to normal now. It was lovely actually,though they didn't do much but Dad walked A to school every day and E got to play lots of games. don't know when we'll see them again though.

Sorry to hear about all the relationship problems. I agree with ledkr and MizK - it's not worth wasting your whole life with someone if you're never going to be happy. The difference between my relationship with dh and my first dh (who also had an anger problem as we've talked about before) is like chalk and cheese. We're all here for metaphorical hand-holding and general blood-letting.

Your PILs holiday sounds like a week of hell ledkr, I wouldn't want to go either. Mine always have to do something every day, preferably exactly what MIL wants and the atmosphere turns instantly sour if you disagree. YAdefNBU.

S is on fine form, but a little monkey climbing everywhere. No fear at all. Talking of 40th birthdays, wiggs, it's mine in a couple of weeks. Dh is busy arranging a party at our house. If everyone comes, then there would be over 30 children in our house, never mind the adults! Please keep fingers crossed that it is still fairly warm by then and the first snow hasn't come!

Hope you all have lovely evenings! Bye for now.

[ILovePonyo]

Hello pals! Havn't posted since before the weekend since I went home to my mums, had a lovely time. Mum got A her own cot bed to go in the spare room, we thought she'd love it but she screamed and screamed the first night, eventually got her to sleep in it, went down no probs the next night!

Can I just describe A's massive meltdown today please, it happened at the worst time and don't think she's had a shitfit like it before (scuse swearing reastie and others but there really is no other word )
We went to visit my supervisor where I used to volunteer, A was asleep when we left but thought she'd be fine, she'd already had a big sleep. Got there, walked in, said hi to people then went to speak to supervisor and A lost it crying, flinging herself about, actual loud screaming whilst people were trying to work We went in another room and she carried on screaming, if I held her she'd squirm around and pull my hair, if I put her down and scream and want to be picked up. I had to leave after 15mins as it was so bad, I was gutted, have been looking forward to a catch up with my supervisor and it was somewhat cringeworthy too. I said to my friend when describing it afterwards, I really could have told her to shut the fuck up there and then if it wasn't a childrens charity I volunteered at

I feel better now I've got that out. Really, of all the crappy timing...

ledkr god no to the hol. Just sounds so uncompatable (sp?) - I know I could not go away with dp's family either, plus the cost is the tipping point really. Holidays with people you like can be hard work so def not the inlaws!

reastie hows things? As you know, just because your dh has an anger problem doesn't make its ok for him to get angry and then say "its my anger problem" like it excuses it. It doesn't sound healthy and you don't want A to think its ok/normal in a relationship - but as to what to actually do I'm not sure yet helpful Just hope you're ok, it sounds like a lot to deal with. How was the ice cream thingy?!

wiggles A always says 'bic bic' (biscuit) first thing, she knows shes not getting one but tries it every morning anyway Glad you're getting your life back, about time!

tadj I am at the 30 children in the house for your birthday - wow!! Glad youre ok and must have been lovely having your parents over, hope you get to see them again soon.

Took A to the Nottingham extravaganza Goose Fair this evening, dp took her on the merry go round because she liked watching it and was nodding that she wanted to go on, as soon as he's paid she started saying "no no no" and they had to get off, he got a refund though!

[reastie]

Hi all

ponyo big sympathies for you with Anya the screaming toddler. Alice has done that with me quite alot at home, but so far not in a place where it would be really embarrassing for me think she's saving that up . You see pre Alice I would eye roll if I saw some toddler behave like that, now I know much better and just feel sympathies for them! Btw Alice is always saying yes to things too then chickening out at the last minute.

tad 30 children in your house??? You must have a big house! I wouldn't fit them all in mine!

blizy when does DH get the results?

wiggles love how O does Irish dancing, makes you sound very Irish

Things OK here. DH not lost his temper this week since I last posted, so I guess that's good. Work been quite full on though and working tomorrow too. And in good news I bought a boden dress this week which was 2 sizes less than my clothes size in June AND IT FIT [proud] had to return it as it didn't suit me though

[blizy]

Hi all, yikes to A's meltdown!

Tad- 30 kids you are a brave woman!

Wiggles- unused to do Irish dancing when I was O's age. I learnt how to point my toe, I was pretty crap at it !

Reastie- well done you, bet you are very proud of yourself!
Dh has an appointment next fri for results .

Had a quiet day, no mindees till after school, so I had a haircut and last min shopping for a wedding outfit, that's me all sorted, thank god! Right got to go get the little darlings!

[hubbard86]

No ones posted since Friday but I hope all ladies and toddlers are ok.

No real news on our front other than Freya runs around like mental now and throws proper throw myself on the floor tantrums when she doesn't get her own way. Toms doing a lot better and is a lot calmer though we still have meltdowns there not as violent or as long.


Can't believe its been over 6months now since I told exdp it was over, but I've met someone and have lost 5 dress sizes in that time and couldn't be happier in myself. Yeah its been hard and I have my guilty moments when I sometimes feel that I should've tried harder and the kids deserve a "normal" family unit but they have me and i do my best even if their dad is really intermittent, that's not my fault and they'll see that.