The last one out forgot to start a new thread!

[blueberryboybait]

Morning, hope you all find me!

Evening all

Limping past on my way to the sofa - was in a rush this morning and managed to slip on the back steps. I landed with full force on both arms and my bum, have some magnificent bruises coming and my arm really hurts. I thought it was just super-wet wooden steps but further examination showed it was a bastard slug Well it's dead now so I can have the last laugh

Hippy oh I don't know what to say but i hope your H comes to his senses and grows up a bit soon. You are such a lovely woman and deserve much more than his petty twattery. Grrrrr on your behalf.

Oh fjorgyn am sorry, I didn't realise it was a really sore one big smooches on all your sore bits

Also Fjorn his mates will come and eat his body up so you could lie in wait for them....

Have some ibuprofen this evening as you will undoubtedly ache in the morning

DH has run off with my new phone and is allegedly sorting lots of apps and making sure all my contacts get transferred. I may be fb'ing you all to get them again

Get the Good Food healthy eating app, it's free this week and it's v good :)

Ooh, i saw that earlier - have asked DH to oblige. Thankyou

Oh stop it with all the iPhone talk

Bastard slugs.

Just been for a sauna and swim with BF, v therapeutic. No work again tmrw so I am helping redecorate her house with her and her sexy grown up stepson. In order to fight my tendency to go all girly and crap in front of him, I have sworn her to join me in wearing painting shorts with hairy legs. It's v hard to treat him like a normal stepson though as he's a year older than me!

Am off out with the expat mums. Will drink a glass of wine ...

Have just had a bit of a rubbish run of non sleeping children and working late so don't really fancy going out, but I do fancy going out so will just have a quick drink.

Thoughts for you Hippy.

Fjorgyn I would like a ipod touch but
a) I don't need one
b) as my mum says, I also don't need an excuse to spend even more time wasting time on the internet
c) I lose mobile phones regularly and so I am not allowed one that costs more than 200 pesos

hospital appt tomorrow for my hip. Hip hip hoo-fecking-ray!!!!!

night all, am up far too late considering I'm on early shift in the morning

Hi. It's a good evening. I've been pondering Hippster's situation. I think DH said something similar to me. I knew he was being an ass at the time. Guys just don't get it. We work really hard, mentally and physically. We don't have a choice but to work through pain and exhaustion. Life depends on it. Not only our own but those of our children. Tell him his accusation was pretty darn nasty. Tell him you trust him with your life and love him with all your heart and that's just not how two people with such depth treat each other. He doesn't need scolding; he just needs an example. You want him to realize YOU want to be treated as YOU treat HIM, with love and concern NOT SCORN and HATRED. I'm not sure who said it but it's true, if he really believed you to be experiencing PND the loving way to deal with it would be to hold you, take the time to help you find yourself again, lead you to safety. Just my opinion. (((hug)))

Bibi, good look with the doctor in a little while.

Boybait, still sending miniBBBB healthy vibes.

Time for me to go to bed.
Night All.

Bibi thanks and hope all goes well at the doctor today.

Fjorgyn I hope you are feeling better - can't believe Bibi didn't mention it so I will - ARNICA!

Crispy friend actually left yesterday so is back now. A big group of us went for pizza and pasta on Sunday evening with the kids. They all had a great time running around in the square where the restaurant was until friends DS somehow wandered off - so they nearly weren't going back to England .

Silk I think I read your post too literally - then again I'm sure cr*apping in front of him would put him off

Salta hope you had a fun night out - sounds like you could do with a break.

Hippy thanks - work is stupidly busy so distracting when I'm there.

TS a lovely post as usual.

morning

good luck today bibi hope it goes well..

sorry for lol at u on fb hots, sounds nasty so hope you don't feel too sore today

crisp sofas still sodden so have a wet bum this am ..

bbbb hope dd2 is back to her healthy self [hugs]..

spent all night awake off and on with my feckin ears... they feel stuffed with cotton wool and kept having v v weired dreams which made me wake up screaming and shouting ... got to get vitamins vitamins vitamins

we are properly the house of lurgi now...dd caught it as well now She's dealing with it all better than me and DS though! I've lost my voice so today is most definitely a pyjama day. i'm seeing how long we can last without cbeebies' help!

blueberry how's dd2 doing today?

enya hope you feel better soon (i was just going to post 'pardon' to you but thought better of it!)

dh and i talked last night for hours. from what i can work out, its back to the old 'he hates living in a pig sty' argument. reckons i've always lived in a mess ever since he's known me and therefore doesn't think i'm ever going to change. i just can't live up to his ocd levels of tidiness. he did admit (eventually) that he can see i've been trying but doesn't think its going to last. so is essentially assuming i'm going to fail and told me as much last night.

ooh, its really raining I love the rain, especially when i'm inside

trying not to make this another essay so i'm off now!

So at what point did you wang him in the face with a frying pan then?

Hippy OFFS why is he bothering to complain now about untidyness? If he knew back then, he made his bed and had better lie in it (scuse the pun). He's just scraping around for things to bring you down because you are stronger than he is. TS is right, mothers are on all the time, always one ear/eye/frontal lobe attuned to what our kids are doing/needing, have been doing/needing, will be doing/needing. We process so much information at such high speeds, we have to let the odd thing go imo. At least at work, he can go and hide in the loo by himself or take a coffee break. A Stepford home carries the cost of an uptight, frazzled wife with no life and therefor no interesting conversation and no energy for sex. That's my excuse for my pigsty anyway.

BTW That is real emotional bullying the whole setting you up to fail and the way he turns things round. It's not sustainable to live like that really and it's not fair that you have to battle against that when you're physically at your lowest - what does that say about him? Cripple basher LOL. What would he say if you suggested Relate counselling?

Enya You have had such a year haven't you, no wonder you are so run down. Have you asked your GP for blood tests? There could be some magical drug that could make a big difference.

Merlion PMSL, I may have to try that if their plumbing is up the spout again.

Am supposed to be working but PMSL at either tidy house or sex and wanging with pans . I am not sure what Mrunfeckingreasonable knows what he is up against with a bunch of premenstrual frazzled mothers coming to the defence of one of their beloved clan. Be afraid MrHippy, be very afraid

I hope all illing people are on the mend and resting and bibi that your hip visit is a tad more useful than previous efforts....

TS glad to hear you had a good evening

thanks crisp, you really made me laugh! DS turned round and started laughing too

silk you made me smile too! but on a serious note, i told him last night that he had to decide if he was going to put any energy into sorting our relationship out because i didn't have enough energy to sort out more than my side. yes, he proably would go to relate but it would be me sorting it out, booking appt, getting childcare etc etc

hmm, phone's ringing..can't be bothered to move. ds and i snuggled on sofa under our blankets watching tv

sorry, i feel like i'm using you lot and not giving anything back at the moment. i really really appreciate all your support

morning.

Hippster, The whole pig sty thing ruffles my feathers. That's an unproductive comment. Is the washing not caught up to speed or is the kitchen floor unmopped? Is there food splattered all over the walls or is the bed unmade? Seriously, I have better talks with my 6 year old. If clutter is the problem, minimize. For that he could have said, 'Let's have a boot sale.' If dirt is the problem, make a cleaning chore list. He could have said, 'How about I scrub the loo every other Tuesday.' If it's laundry, go naked. Ha ha just kidding maybe . Wording is key. A relationship counselor will tell you the very same thing. It's a choice to speak nicely and with thought. Ask him would he speak the same way to his mother? Venting is allowed but it doesn't have to be cruel especially if a positive outcome is wanted.

For now though, take everything in stride. Remember when pregnant we all had our "moments". You can label this "his moment". When you are both more rested, less busy and more willing to communicate respectfully, have a cup of tea together. Talk about the things you love about each other then talk about the ways you can help each other in whatever areas need helping.

School run in a moment.....

Hippy I am sorry to hear that all is rubbish, and I know that this is a task oriented male thinking solution that doesn't really address the core issue, but, could you get a cleaner?

We have a cleaner for 12 hours a week at the moment due to the whole non-settling at nursery issue (we will do until March when we try DS again at nursey and she will do more child care again).

he accepts that the house is ok at the moment but the problem is he doesn't think it'll last. so i guess what he's doing is complaining about what's going to happen in the future. apparently my past behaviour means that my future will be equally untidy.

his answer is to get a cleaner and then i won't have to do anything. he reckons the cleaner will also miraciously know where everything belongs and will tidy the house too (including putting away laundry). i don't want a cleaner. i have a manageable routine at the moment and feel that i've achieved something when i see the house is nice

happy school run to you . is drop off as crazy as pick up?

hi salta, x post with you but i answered your question before i read it. now thats magic!

hippy I have to interject here - you may not have PnD, but you are crayyyyzzzeeeee. You don't want a cleaner?

Sorry, got carried away - maybe that's just me who feels like that

Salta - 12hrs......., although i suspect they are a tad cheaper

i just don't want anyone here. i'd find it embarrassing. what do you do when they're cleaning? also, what does your cleaner actually do? maybe you'll be able to convince me!

hip i have a cleaner that comes in once a week.. i still obv clean every day but whe she come i she tackles all the areas that need a really good clean, tries to sort out the playroom which is a mess every day and gives the kitchen and bathroom a really good clean.. it just makes the rest of the week easier to try and get on top of it iykwim...

yeh gods truly feeling like death warmed and a temperature to boot ... dd2 was at the cm this morning so off to collect her now then home to wait to collect dd1.. have been trying to make "h" collect one/or both of them but to be fair he did the school run for the last few days and really needs to stay in the office boo

ok and my "n" button appears to be sticking!! hope u understood that hip xx