Prostitutes and the past

[cringe]

Did any of your husbands/partners/ sleep with a prostitute before they met you? How do you feel about it? Does it put you off them? Or is it rare? Its making me wonder if he is a sweaty old desperate pervert. Help.

Sophable, do you really think prostitution isn't exploitative? Don't you think if women have a real choice (in so many things but for example, if they were even paid the same as men for the same job for a start) they rarely exercise it by selling sex?

WWW in answer to your question, I don't think it is always and inevitably exploitative no. I do think that it is a choice for some women, inasmuch as any of us have choices, life is a compromise isn't it. there are middle class women that choose to be so called 'high class' hookers as a great way of earning very good money (but these are not people that would be poor if they didn't sell sex) and being able to work when they want for how long they want to.

and there are gradations all the way down to the underage sex slaves that have been mentioned many many times on this thread.

i certainly don't believe that all men should be condemned outright if they have visited a prostitute in the past, and believe that men and women have the absolute right to buy and sell sex if they do so from a position of choice (and I do accept that many prostitutes don't).

to my mind it's the same arguement as pornography: not all of it is wrong, that is, it is not wrong in the nature of what it is, but in terms of how it is achieved...

hope that makes some sex, whoops, sense i mean

also i love a good heated debate ;)

Ah well, there you go sophable, I don't like pornography either. So you do accept that many prostitutes don't have a choice? If there is no choice then surely exploitation exists?

yes and yes. i accept that many don't have a choice and accept that a lot of prostitution is exploitative.

Oh ok, we agree on that then!

I'd be interested to know how many women would consider, or have paid for sex with a male escort? And is there a different opinion on women buying sex or not?

I haven't and wouldn't Lou but then, I do think men are pretty easy to get into bed and it's a rare woman who couldn't find a man if a shag was all she wanted

Yes, but wouldn't it be easier to go and find one you like the look of,to know that they were going to have sex at the end of the night with you, rather than fretting, and that they are being paid to satisfy you?

i suspect lou that women still don't get the satisfaction in the bedroom dept they deserve. i think it's a really interesting question tho. is it still exploitative if the genders are reversed??

thanks soph

Do women HAVE to be prostitutes though?

we have a welfare system in this country, so do women have to turn to prostitution?

and Lou, did your dh own the brothel or did he just know the madame?

my argument is that not all women do, and that their choice to sell their bodies/sexual selves should be respected and not subject to generalisations and assumptions that they must be poor deluded exploited victims.

i knew the madame and dh knew the owner.

! thanks lou for letting me be nosey

that's ok, I wouldn't have posted if i wasn't prepared to answer questions about it. Sort of braced myself for a telling off actually....

Message withdrawn

lou, is this really the first time you ever mentioned this on MN? Have we never had a "where did you meet DH/DP?" thread?

Message withdrawn

dunno jan, i can never remember what i post after it is done. It's possible.

If he had he certainly wouldn't tell me. I would be horrified if he had and I am sure that he is aware of this.