Stuff you think must happen to other people - but can't risk asking?

[IMissFrance]

Anyone else have stuff happen to you that must happen to others.

But you can't really ask because what if they say "NO! How weird!" And then you can never talk to that person again.

So I'm bringing it to the anonymity of Mumsnet.

I'd love to hear other peoples. And will start off.

• whenever I wash my hair in the shower (I have long hair) loose hairs wash down my back and end up in my bum crack. End of my shower I have to check there's no hair left.

I can't be alone in this grossness! (Or can I)

I feel so left out that I’ve never had javelin arse!! Also never had the random big gush of water after a bath, nothing ever comes out
However I have had the hair in the bum crack (and vagina) whenever I wash it, it’s so annoying. In orgasm in my sleep a lot but it’s always when I really need a wee? Wondering if it has anything to do with muscles tightening or something weird.
My right earlobe always smells cheesy and my left never does even though I wash them religiously every day!
When I’m tired my eyelids feel gummy and make a really horrible clicking sound when I blink I’ve also had the weird nipples touched/forlorn feeling.
This is such a weird one but my hands always smell weird when I wake up in the morning. Not of anything bad but just a kind of hamsterish smell. They never smell like that during the day, only when I wake up in the morning. So strange.
I’ve got loads more weird things but I think that’s probably quite enough for now!

I get a sharp pain if I see someone hurt themselves, on say “You’ve been framed”... but it’s in my stomach!! It’s like someone has punched me!!

Shamelessly place marking so I can find this thread again.

Sometimes I will get a pain like someone has stabbed me up the bum, only lasts a second and it's really sharp!

I actually get that quite badly and it lasts a few minutes, sometimes it wakes me up in the night. It feels like I've got cramp up there!

Oh and yes....I did poo during labour, both times, luckily the midwife had a net to 'fish it out of the water' and I always have to retrieve a long hair from my bum crack after washing my hair! Comforting to know it's not just me! 😊

With dc number 3 or 4 (can’t remember which) I got an enlarged vulva with varicose veins there.... shudder at it now but went after giving birth

This is a great thread!!

I always wondered about the vag water collection, so glad it’s not just me! I recently discovered (embarrassed to write this) that if I pull my butt cheeks apart and up a bit then shake a bit it all comes out so there is no embarrassing leaking later! Interestingly since I got pregnant it hasn’t been collecting water 🤷🏻‍♀️

Also get the hair in bum crack, jabby bum pain, sleep orgasms.

Yes to so many of these!!
Does anyone else have a bath but stand up when it's time to wash themselves in it? My dh thinks I'm a weirdo!

Unsuspecting mini orgasms whilst doing normal day to day tasks?

Or when using an applicator tampon, a bit of your fanny flap gets caught between the tubes

This is me!! In our house it’s called “chewing your face” and I was literally doing just that as I read your post!!
I was once on TV doing it; I was at a football match which happened to be on Sky sports and there I was, having a right god chew!! My DH recorded it and the video still exists somewhere with the caption “oldYoekshirePud chewing face on Sky”!! 😂😂😂

*Always been able to do it on demand.
Proved it to my chums at a school residential (197) by sitting in a horse trough and ahem 'decanting' water, several times, which was then sniff tested by Alison C. to rule out piss

This is so so funny.

Unsuspecting mini orgasms whilst doing normal day to day tasks?

I get coregasms....bloody annoying in fitness classes!

I have trichotillomania which is apparently really common but never seems to get much of a mention on MN. It's that same ingrown hair/picking type of satisfaction but gone haywire so you end up pulling you eyebrows and eyelashes out and biting them afterwards so odd!

After 4 vag births ...Fluid after sex.. really annoying I feel I wake up all night shoving tissue there to soak it up.

I drool loads at night when I sleep, it’s so bad I have to sleep with a towel on my pillow, I’ve no idea what causes it though but it totally grossed me out.

I had a c section and no one has mentioned I pooed but I remember being worried that I would if I had a natural birth.

No to bath water and hair in bum crack

Oh and after 4 vag births I can’t wear a tampon as it goes sideways and I worry I will loose it!

Varmak yes that happens to me too, but only since I've been overweight.

I thought of another one too....does anyone else get fanny flutters while watching sporn?

@Tazmania77

I'm sure its normal but never thought to ask. If I ever see a child hurt themselves I.e fall over etc I get a sharp stabbing pain in my vagina!! Not sure if thats normal or not!!

Oh this happens to me if I see anyone fall and hurt themselves even those videos on TV showing people falling etc

@Lolalovesroses Me too, but I shout out " I love/hate"usually the name of an ex-boyfriend that I have no interest in whatsoever!

Oh, it's not just me then!

@whitershadeofpale

My discharge bleaches my knickers after I’ve had them for a while

Yesssssssss!

Lol I love this!! Yup, I have really long hair and I have to check too!

[quote SignOnTheWindow]@Baublebox Oh yes. When I started swimming again after a long break, I used to have to take pads to put on afterwards otherwise it was like waters breaking. Also quite embarrassing when you're walking to the changing rooms looking as if you're merrily pissing away...[/quote]
@SignOnTheWindow @Baublebox and by the pool on those things called 🤔...... god. What are they..... holidays.

DH ' I've got you a drink ' sit up on sun lounger.... and out it comes 😭😭😭😳😳😳

@Imissthegym I have eyelashes in the corner of my eyes too!!!! I thought I was the only one

When I was pregnant with my DS my vaginal PH changed and it bleached all my underwear. Also it mean that my vagina would irritate my OHs penis during sex, he’d have to wash his penis straight after and put cream on it as it itches and burned. It was quite funny (for me). It went back to normal after I gave birth.

@AnotherSoddingWalk

I've always had this thing which makes me feel really ashamed actually.

If I see something really horrifying, like a scary murder scene in a film, or something that really makes me feel sick, I get a fanny tingle as if I'm turned on. But I'm the OPPOSITE of turned on, I'm viscerally disgusted by what I see. It's weird and I hate it.

I get a stabbing achey fanny pain when I'm looking down from somewhere high- I'm very scared of heights- why my fanny gets scared I'll never know..

[quote Cautionsharpblade]@Esspee not much is known about female ejaculation. I’m not sure it’s even understood. It’s often dismissed as myth, or fetishised. I can only speak personally but there’s a rough patch about 3 inches into the vagina on the wall nearest the urethra. If it’s rubbed, it triggers ejaculation. You just have to find an angle that works. I can’t do it on my own (can’t touch myself at all) it has to be PIV or fingers[/quote]
Well it’s definitely not a myth. 😁