Stuff you think must happen to other people - but can't risk asking?

[IMissFrance]

Anyone else have stuff happen to you that must happen to others.

But you can't really ask because what if they say "NO! How weird!" And then you can never talk to that person again.

So I'm bringing it to the anonymity of Mumsnet.

I'd love to hear other peoples. And will start off.

• whenever I wash my hair in the shower (I have long hair) loose hairs wash down my back and end up in my bum crack. End of my shower I have to check there's no hair left.

I can't be alone in this grossness! (Or can I)

@Thisbastardcomputer

We used to discuss subjects like this at work, large mainly female office.

One of the women was looking after her Mums dogs and walked them to the local golf course, she was intrigued by the amount of human shit and lone men wandering about (not golfers).

It was decided upon that it was a sort of pick up area for men, it was secluded, but the question then was, does the shit happen before or after sex.

She promptly jumped up and went to ask a gay man who worked in another office, god I nearly died when she went.

Came back with an answer though........... after.

I think i've led a more sheltered life than i thought!

Is this to do with taking poppers to get the arse to relax?

The first time I squirted I was insistent that my bf at the time had come and the condom had split. Made him pull out and check, only to realise it had been me

@Imworthit

If I see a hammer I get a strong urge to hit someone on the head with it, not for any reason...don’t worry I’m never gonna do it but yeah I don’t ever mention that in real life.

There’s a saying for that “When you hold a hammer everything looks like a nail.” 😁😁😁

The tingly/ tight/ heavy or burning feeling when you drink wine is a mild allergic reaction to the tannins in some wine. Look up wine urticaria or Asian flush. I went to my doctor when mine got pretty bad, changed nothing, it went away. Doctor told me it’s pretty common and usually harmless apart from taking an antihistamine or just not drinking there’s not much to do about it. Hope that helps.

Also had the weird sturnum popping thing. Hurt like hell. Actually got checked for a heart attack (so embarrassing, not my choice) turned out it was Gord-acid reflux. I swear it was the bone cracking but took the medicine and the pain went away 🤷‍♀️

My wee would sometimes smell like cheerios but hasn't happened for a couple of years

If I bite my thumb nail too short I can feel a twinge of pain in my heart!

Thanks EmbarrasingAdmissions, I’d missed that as her post was quite varied and I’d been skim reading trying to find chest hairs to put my mind at ease (which still hasn’t fully happened yet 😳)

Yes I get the sore ears sometimes at night, it’s horrible!!!

Also yes to all the other female ones that seem quite standard - javelin bum, sore fanny before period, period poo and retaining bath water!!

@strudsespark yes i get that with my belly button too, if I poke it I feel a twinge in my foof

Sometimes I wake up trembling, I have no idea what it is

My armpits and neck hurt when I sneeze.. please say I’m not the only one

Anyone else stay up all night reading shit on MN and the realise it’s daylight !!! Ah crap it seems to late to go to bed now

Yes I get it, feel like my lowest rib has crossed under the one above it, and is an intense horrible pain/feeling. When it happens to me I have bend backwards or lie down and wait for them to uncross
Me too a piece of muscle comes through like a baby hand across my top rib and breast bone I think there is a rip in my muscle it happens when I put on a pair of tights too I've to lean back and pop it in. Physio stumped too.

I'm so relieved to meet fellow sleepgasmers, and at least one other orgasmic birther.
The sleep ones are definitely more common when DH and I aren't having much sex.
They didn't start until my thirties and after I'd had the orgasmic birth, definitely getting less common in menopause
The orgasm during birth wasn't particularly pleasurable, just intense with lots of hard contractions very close together, like a man ejaculating, then massive relaxation and relief afterwards

@CALLMEMUM urinary incontinence isn't something to put up with, see your go!
In the worst case it can be a result of spinal cord damage and needs to be sorted, 99% of the time it's age/childbirth related and can be improved.
I get really pissed off with adverts for Tena suggesting little accidents just happen. Just because it happens to women doesn't mean it shouldn't be treated.
Rant over

ILOVEOWL Sometimes I remember an event from the past and I physically inhale with the shame of it. Nothing bad, just mortifying things where I was a knob. They bring me physical pain.

This happens to me all the time....my husband used to think I was nuts, now he's used to it!

Massive yes to so the maladaptive daydreaming, I live alone and my other lives have helped so much in lockdown. I actually do it too much I think.

One from me, as I sit down to poo I always part my bum cheeks. I also saw something on tv about a poo stool to put your feet on when going, it puts your colon in the right position. I didn't want to buy one so tried my bathroom pedal bin instead and now only poo with my feet up on my bin 🙈🙈

In the garden

Thanks to those, who have super sensitive belly buttons, don't feel such a mal-wired freak now .

And hey @mnhq, I named this thread for classics yesterday. Could you make it compulsory reading, too .

@Dreamer111

Massive yes to so the maladaptive daydreaming, I live alone and my other lives have helped so much in lockdown. I actually do it too much I think.

One from me, as I sit down to poo I always part my bum cheeks. I also saw something on tv about a poo stool to put your feet on when going, it puts your colon in the right position. I didn't want to buy one so tried my bathroom pedal bin instead and now only poo with my feet up on my bin 🙈🙈

I use a poo stool! It's actually an Ikea one for the kids to be able to reach the sink but it really helps!

Any possible hairy handed fetishists should be put off by the range of our female peculiarities so I second the nomination for Classics please.

@mnhq

If I try to wiggle my left big toe, the toe next to it wiggles along too. If I wiggle my right big toe, the 2 toes next to it dance along..... is this a thing?!

Oh, yes to maladaptive daydreaming too. I have a wide range of incredibly detailed alternative fantasy lives and during lockdown/shielding they’ve kept me sane!

I'm glad I don't get the javelin thing, it sounds horrible.

My weird thing is that I don't produce any lubrication during sex. Even if I'm really in to it. It's dry as a bone up there . Not sure if I'm missing a gland, or doing it wrong.

@vivariumvivariumsvivaria

Breastfed 3 babies in a row. Weaned them each at a year.

Still could produce a decent squirt of milk for SIX YEARS.

GP did some blood tests, found nothing and suggested that I must be either still feeding the babies...or my husband.

I changed GP, I mean, I ASK YOU! but, am none the wiser about why my boobs kept busy.

😂🤣