Stuff you think must happen to other people - but can't risk asking?

[IMissFrance]

Anyone else have stuff happen to you that must happen to others.

But you can't really ask because what if they say "NO! How weird!" And then you can never talk to that person again.

So I'm bringing it to the anonymity of Mumsnet.

I'd love to hear other peoples. And will start off.

• whenever I wash my hair in the shower (I have long hair) loose hairs wash down my back and end up in my bum crack. End of my shower I have to check there's no hair left.

I can't be alone in this grossness! (Or can I)

@Bugslydoo

Does anyone else feel really sad or sort of get a sense of loneliness when their nipples are touched? Or am I just weird? It’s not all the time when me and hubs are doing foreplay but sometimes I’m like-meh

Oh. My. God. Totally! It’s so weird.

Period farts. Awful. Periods mess up digestive system. Glad to have got rid now am on mini pill. and migraines etc

Witchy hair growing out of chiny chin chin! Have to keep an eye on that bugger before people start randomly asking me for love spells when I'm out and about. Or maybe I'll embrace it. Could be a whole new career.

The joys of middle age eh?

I’m the only person I know who gets diarrhoea as a reaction to nerves, excitement or adrenalin.

I’m like this. When I was single dating was a nightmare as I’d always need a poo if I had first date nerves. And I mean while on the date, not before or after

This is super common! It's part of your fight or flight reflex. In caveman times if you needed to run away from a predator it was in your interests to be as light as possible hence the tummy empty

I also hurt my own nipples rolling over if naked, when now DH first saw them he proclaimed they were like coat hooks 🙈😂😂

That reminds me. I get the urge to go when I go into a bookshop or library, or when I'm settling down to concentrate on something.

And recently I found out that it's a thing - Mariko Aoki phenomenon.

en.wikipedia.org/wiki/Mariko_Aoki_phenomenon

@Sporranrummager

Have name changed for this ........

Anyone else orgasm in their sleep?
Anyone else orgasm while giving birth?

Please say yes, please say yes, please say yes

Yes while asleep, first happened when I was 16 and has been a regular feature throughout my life. If I'm having a dry spell then my body seems to take over and sort itself out. They are very "pure" and intense, and usually just before I wake up, which makes getting up for work even more difficult than normal.

Not while giving birth, but given the pressure on some nerves I wouldn't be surprised.

@mamaatthegym

I’m the only person I know who gets diarrhoea as a reaction to nerves, excitement or adrenalin.

Thus - I did not poo giving birth because I had got so excited and nervous in early labour that I had already emptied the contents of my bowels

I get this too! Anxiety poops! I did poop with both labours though They were too fast for me to poop first Active labour with my second is listed at 2 minutes.

Yes to period shits too! I read it's caused by the cramping as it makes your bowels cramp too and I have awful cramps.

Hurt my nipples rolling over but I have little nipples just huge saggy boobs

Dry skin on my nipples-I can scratch it off! Always been this way for 20 years or so!!!

I have read about orgasmic births but never found anyone in RL. Wonder how often it happens? Have to ask a midwife that one.

I have had an orgasm in sleep, also via daydreams (takes longer than manual at same time though). I have been known to squirt. Its deffo not pee.

@MisiSam

Sometimes I will get a pain like someone has stabbed me up the bum, only lasts a second and it's really sharp!

Shooty bum!!! 😂😂😂

Yup, there is some hair pulling from the arse on wash days, even my DD (6) gets some of her long hair in her arse crack :D I thought this was universal

Ha ha yes to the hair in my crack, yes to tummy button fluff and yes I did wee when in labour all over my other half's shoe... we often laugh about that one...

Sometimes my fanny will just randomly squirt a bit of liquid out. Its not piss, I have smelt it, and its always around ovulation but isnt that jelly stuff. Like a clear liquid. Why. Had to change my knickers 3 times yesterday.

Also now im off to check my arse crack.

@KisstheTeapot14

Period farts. Awful. Periods mess up digestive system. Glad to have got rid now am on mini pill. and migraines etc

Witchy hair growing out of chiny chin chin! Have to keep an eye on that bugger before people start randomly asking me for love spells when I'm out and about. Or maybe I'll embrace it. Could be a whole new career.

The joys of middle age eh?

The beard!! 😩 DM whiskers started in her 50's, mine in my 20's! Cheers then 👍🏼 Your post is hilarious 😂

I have a weird wee thing where I wee before bed, but then if I have to wee again to make sure it’s all out! Wee, wash hands, wee, wash hands, bed. I also like to wee before cinema or anything I can’t get out of easily.

And yes to period diarrhoea - my dd gets them too ‘mum I had a gross period shit.’ Thanks for letting me know (but I do understand!).

@AccidentallyRunToWindsor

I’m the only person I know who gets diarrhoea as a reaction to nerves, excitement or adrenalin.

I’m like this. When I was single dating was a nightmare as I’d always need a poo if I had first date nerves. And I mean while on the date, not before or after

This is super common! It's part of your fight or flight reflex. In caveman times if you needed to run away from a predator it was in your interests to be as light as possible hence the tummy empty

It's why people say they are 'shitting themselves' to mean afraid.

@Whythesadface

This combined poo and hair. One day after a poo, I can feel some weird pressure from the edge of my bum, I look down to see a single poo, swinging from a hair, now that was an odd feeling.

A cling-on

Anyone else inclined to fart when they have a really good orgasm?

Luckily, my late DP thought it was hilarious.

When I have a wee I touch (the lightest possible) the small of my back above my bum crack- - it's starts the wee off, and sometimes help get the last bit out. I've done it since a small child

Omg yes! Genuinely thought I was a weirdo for this. It really helps though especially as I'm prone to UTIs and it helps me fully empty my bladder.

Yes to hair in bum crack... And I have a flat arse as well!

My period farts and poos are vile but satisfying... And yes I also get the fanny ache it's like my vag is trying to turn itself inside out.

Anyone ever fart (a loud gassy one) and feel like it's come out of their vagina as well? It seems to happen when I'm wearing tight trousers so maybe the fart redirects itself 🤷‍♀️

Oh another one... I can only have an intense clit orgasm if my legs are straight and really tensed. If my legs are bent it's piddly or nonexistent. Please say this is a thing....

Yes if I'm having anxiety issues then I need the toilet and my stomach is in knots

Orgasm in my sleep which causes shooting pain up my bum followed by constipation.

DD age 19 has little to no body hair. If she shaves her legs they stay hair free and smooth and stubble free for around 3 months. She has around 3 wispy underarm hairs. Bitch.

Yes to period shits, stress diarrhoea, self-bleaching knickers, inability to put finger inside belly button because it feels too weird, and water-retaining minge.

My two weird ones that I haven’t seen mentioned are: the skin behind my left ear always smells cheesy no matter how recently I’ve showered. The skin behind my right ear never does no matter how overdue a shower I might be.

And does anyone else finding lifting one foot off the floor helpful in dislodging a reluctant or, ahem, incomplete poo?