Roman Mumsnet

[KeemaNaanAndCurryOn]

Can you find me some sandals to go with this toga?

AIBU to think that my slaves don't need a day off?

Who is your favourite person in the Forum?

What else?

[Portofino]

DHus has been to the market and brought home IV new slave girls without discussing it with me first. II of them are twins and he says they will have the sole role of seeing to him in the bathhouse. Am I being selfish?

[molepom]

I'm Spartacus

[cocolepew]

Gladiator sandals, yay or nay? I'm not sure if they're a bit last year.

[Portofino]

AIBU to start a Punic War?

[LineRunner]

I have to spend most of tomorrow picnicking with my MIL at the tomb of our ancestors. Last year she banged on all day about the glory days of the sodding Republic. AIBU to want to whack her over the head with an amphora?

[Cremolafoam]

Anyone got a good low carb recipe for dormouse ? BIWI?
Got maximus Aurelius coming for prandium tomorrow and he's doing Atkinsius.

[LineRunner]

AIBU to think that Emperor Nero actually is the finest opera singer in the Graceo-Roman world?

[CountBapula]

This thread is surely destined for Classics. For more than one reason...

[Hopefullyrecovering]

Arf at the hypocaust

Please can we have a discussion on suitable sandals now? All this relationship-thread stuff about slave girls, and the property-thread stuff about volcano issues is worrying me. I want to talk about sandals. And possibly togas, but sandals are my priority.

[TalcAndTurnips]

cocolepew - I am quite at a loss to understand the fashion for gladiator sandals. I was offered a pair round the back of the Colosseum the other day - they were soaked in gore and one still had half a leg and a foot in it

I'll stick to rubbing the soles of my feet with goat dung and trussing them in hemp, if you don't mind.

[Alameda]

how did I miss this! (have to post as haven't quite mastered what to do with 'threads I'm watching')

[frustratedpineapplepants]

Where's the best stall to haggle for salt, my usual provider had his hands cut off for diddling his taxes, and I don't fancy pink salt.

[Alameda]

(Romans AND big cats might be a bit much for my excessive horn disorder though)

[LineRunner]

My son's specially-imported Greek tutor has just decided to change the grade boundaries for Rhetoric. Can he just do this?

[Tee2072]

Oh do not get me started on the Republic! I was down at the forum the other day and this new bloke, Plato, or something? Anyway, he was going on and on about the bloody republic.

Like I don't have enough to worry about with all this ash...

[FasterHigherBeardierDaddyman]

My new neighbour is a Gaul. Wibu to welcome them to the via by chopping his head of and enslaving his family? I really need someone to clear the floor in the vomitarium.

[TalcAndTurnips]

AIBU to check the contents of my eunuch's loincloth?

I'm a bit suspicious that there may be more 'in there' than there should be.

When he was waiting upon my teenage daughter as she took her ass milk bath the other day, I couldn't help noticing that he was staring a lot - followed by what I took to be tumescence in the phallic department.

When he is singing at supper, his voice is less than a sweet soprano - more like a basso profundo.

If I find out I've been sold a lemon by that bloody slave trader again, I shall be straight on to the Senate. Either that or I'll just see to the lad myself with my penknife - probably cheaper in the long run.

[ella47]

I want to sacrifice one of our bulls to Nemesis and ask her to do something vile to MIL, DH isn't that bothered about his mother but objects to having vole for dinner instead of roast bull. AIBU?

[frustratedpineapplepants]

ella yabu to waste the bull. Why don't you sacrifice mil?

[bananaistheanswer]

Help! I'm having some boundary issues with our neighbours, they're a rowdy lot. My mate Hadrian thinks we could just build a wall and that'll sort everything out. AIBU to consider letting Hadrian loose with his trowel? I'm worried it might antagonise things

[KeemaNaanAndCurryOn]

Does anyone have any suggestions for Galley cruises? DH is suggesting that we visit Egypt, but I've heard they have a bad problem with asps and would prefer to go to Phoenica.

[LineRunner]

Get Agrippa

[fridakahlo]

Keema, as long as you bear in mind you cannot trust the Phoenicans as far as you can throw them, you shoukd be fine.

[LineRunner]

Please help me with some advice, the situation in my family is getting out of hand. Years ago my grandad Hadrian built a really big wall, with special pointing and everything, and everyone loved it and it got a special award for suppressing the natives.

Now my brother Antoninus says he wants to build a really big wall as well, just a few miles further north. How can I convince him that it's futile and vain and no-one will ever care, and that within a few years all anyone will talk about is how much better Hadrian's wall always was? Please help.

[DizzyBeeisSchoolShoeShopping]

Since we got these new lead cups my memory has not been what it was...should I be worried?