Journey after miscarriage support thread March 2023

[SMG1992]

Hi All,

I've started a new thread as the other was at page 39.
I hope everyone had a good weekend. I'm still just about in my fertile window - I got my LH surge yesterday.

The clocks going forward has hot me a little bit, but I'm looking forward to brighter evenings.

@Shortmuse that’s a really awful experience you have had and it’s cruel that our bodies take a while to catch up on what has happened.
Im glad to hear that your surgery went well and you are able to try again.
Hope you are doing ok 💜

@Pinkmoon23 unless you have been told otherwise I think it’s fine to try as soon as you are ready to. Some people suggest waiting a cycle until you have a had a period but I think that is just so you can better track when your last period was xx

@SnookyPook sorry for the delay! I tested that morning on the digital and it was negative, tested twice too whilst there and still negative so I had a good time! Tested today and got a BFP... I feel super guilty now and also I was prescribed antibiotics last week and have took Sudafed which is apparently a no no in pregnancy and I read some horror stories about linkages to defects. Can anyone help but my mind at easy any? It's done now and I took the Sudafed maybe over a 4 day period as I was really suffering. I did tell the doctor I was trying for a baby so he prescribed me with amoxicillin just in case which is apparently the safest in pregnancy, so that is something I suppose. I know I'd have been on high alert anyway after the MC but this is all an extra worry.

How's everyone doing this week? Sorry to hear of the recent losses, it really is the club nobody wants to be in x

@Nmvasey85 aw congratulations, that’s brilliant news!! I love hearing of everyone’s bfps 😍

How have you been feeling?

I didn’t know about Sudafed, I’m sure taken taken over a short period of time wouldn’t cause any harm however.

@Nmvasey85 oh wow! Congratulations! I get you feeling shitty but you didn't know and soooo many pregnancies start out with mums binge drinking etc and not realising. Hopefully all absolutely fine for you! How are you doing? X

I'm feeling OK thanks, which is another scary thing, I didn't have many symptoms with the MC, although it's very early days so I'm trying to get that thought out of my mind - easier said than done!

How's everyone else doing this week?

@Nmvasey85 congratulations! I'm sure it'll be OK with the sudafed. How many dpo are you? Will you keep testing?

@SnookyPook How's your tww going, are you close to testing time?

My pregnancy symptoms have shifted up a gear (I'm now 6w3d), feeling exhausted and nauseous. Still finding it hard to feel positive or excited about the pregnancy, it feels so early and fragile. I have my booking appointment on Friday

Hi All, I am new to mumsnet, I am sorry you have all had to go through miscarriage it’s such an awful experience. I’m an 3 weeks post MVA after a MMC picked up at 12 week scan -MVA procedure done at 13 weeks. I am not sure if anyone has been in a similar situation and how long it took you to have your first period ? I spotted for a couple of days after the procedure but I wouldn’t be expecting my period until Tuesday based on usual 28 day cycle. I went for an ultrasound yesterday and was told they could see the corpus on the right side indicating I had ovulated ? I’m not sure if this could still be the corpus from the pregnancy, maybe still there from months ago as I know it does stay until you’re around 12 weeks pregnant ? Maybe mine hasnt broke down yet who knows. Sometimes the scans can leave you feeling confused with even more questions . Any advice or experiences of what to expect in regards to my body getting back to norm would be appreciated 😊Thanks x

@Lee444 I’m so sorry for your loss, similar to you I was 11 weeks, it’s just devastating. It took 3 weeks for me to ovulate and had my first af 5 weeks after the procedure. It was 8 weeks before hcg was undetectable though so just to be aware u can still test positive on preg tests even when u get ur first period (this really confused/upset me at the time but I think if I knew it was possible it might not have been as upsetting)

how are you feeling now a few weeks out? What I will say is it deff gets easier with time, those first few weeks I found so difficult, take care of urself and try to do something nice for urself if u can❤️

@DmcinT im so sorry for you loss too ❤️ yes it’s soul destroying, I found it hard to believe it was actually happening, I had a private scan at 8 weeks showing us baby’s heartbeat, I told family it’s just such a shock but I’m not alone it happens to so many other people it’s just not spoke about enough. Thanks so much for sharing your experience, maybe the scan was correct then and it was possible to ovulate 2-3 weeks after MVA.so interesting about the hcg 8 weeks on ! I am still getting faint tests so thanks for heads up, it baffles me that our bodys can be ovulating / AF all while hcg is still in our systems, we naturally try to read in to everything to understand what’s happening.

Im ok, I actually feel better as the weeks go on but trying not to obsess over what my body is doing and will I ever get pregnant again and have a healthy pregnancy, yes I’m going to book on to a yoga class to help me. How are you feeling now ? How long has it been for you ? X

@Lee444 sorry about your loss, hope you deal with it better than I did/ am doing!

I had an MMC at 11 weeks, DC immediately after and got my first period 8 weeks after. At 11/12 weeks the hcg is very high and this is why it is detectable on hpts for 3/4 weeks after.
do you know when the baby stopped growing?
I also ovulated in between but no luck.
take care of yourself…and do what you need to in order to get through it..not over because it almost never happens!
@DmcinT how are you doing now?
was it also your first?
Im here if you need to talk..

@Lee444 so sorry for your loss, sorry I can't add anything as I MC at 9 weeks naturally. I felt a real sense of desperation to be pregnant again but that settled as the weeks went on and I became a little more relaxed about it.

@Hankthehonk I'm 21 DPO, I'll maybe test again next Monday but I'm anxious already so I'm trying to not obsess over it - easier said than done!

@Iammagic thank you for your reply and sorry for your loss ❤️ yes that’s it I think some people get their period back soon and some it takes longer there is no real way of knowing sadly but I’m hoping it will come soon. Baby stopped growing at around 8 weeks must have been just after the early private scan I had.

@Nmvasey85 thank you for your reply also and I’m sorry that you have also been through a miscarriage ❤️I really hope as time goes on I become more relaxed it’s not good to obsess like this. When did your period return?

@Lee444 so sorry for your loss. I also had a MMC detected at 12 weeks - baby had stopped developing at 7+5. There is no pain like it. Mine was mid-April and I am doing lots better now than I thought I would be tbh. I think I really did take time to grieve it when it was fresh and that has helped me going forwards. I had surgery booked but ended up passing it naturally over the weekend before the surgery so not quite the same situation as you, however, my period started 5 weeks to the day after my miscarriage bleeding started. So that first 'cycle' was a bit longer than normal for me - also wasn't tracking LH so not quite sure what my hormones were doing. Since then I've had one shorter than usual cycle (25 days) and my current cycle seems to be closer to my typical - from opks ovulation appears to have been around CD17 (would usually be CD13-15 for me) and on track for a 30day cycle (or hopefully not... 🤞🏻🌈)

This is obviously just my experience and I know from chatting to others on here that theres a whole range of possibility for cycles after loss. I feel like I've been fairly lucky with mine. Fingers crossed you will get back on track quickly too. Are you hoping to TTC again quite soon? ❤️

@Hankthehonk 7dpo... Won't be testing until AF due so another week at least!! Just trying to keep busy and not overthink too much, however proper on hyper-alert for possible signs 🤦🏼‍♀️ Conscious that any signs I've experienced thus far would be pre-implantation so not reliable anyway as that is the most important part! With the one I lost I had a day of implantation cramps at 8dpo but didn't with my DS so.. not sure if that would be reassuring or not 🤷🏼‍♀️ Anyway... No point worrying now.. it's either happening or it's not! Time will tell ... 🤞🏻🌈

@Lee444 I'm so sorry for your loss, everyone here understands the pain and what you're going through. I hope you find these threads bring some level of comfort and support.
I also had a private scan at 7w6d that was positive and we saw the heartbeat, told lots of people after that and we felt so excited. Unfortunately my miscarriage happened naturally less than a week after that, this was in March.
So our experiences were not exactly the same but my cycle timelines afterwards might be useful:
10 days post mc - negative hcg test
4 weeks post mc - ovulation (caught with opks and bbt tracking, did not get pregnant)
6 weeks post mc - period
Tracked everything after this but no ovulation when it should have happened, cycle irregular and confusing
9 weeks post mc - random spotting
11 weeks post mc - ovulation (caught with opks and bbt tracing, did get pregnant)

So I am now 6w3d pregnant again and very anxious. I found my long irregular cycle very confusing but I'm glad I was obsessively tracking everything (admittedly a bit of a coping mechanism) since I did successfully catch ovulation and get pregnant reasonably quickly.

@SnookyPook You're halfway there, you're doing great! It's inevitable you'll be on hyper alert, probably even more so in this coming week.
I could never hold out for af, but I have always had quite early bfps around 9dpo. Admire your willpower!

@Hankthehonk both mine were squinters at 15dpo which helps my resolve as doubtful I would see anything earlier anyway! Haha. Can't be doing with all the 'is it or isn't it' etc! However it is extremely tempting even so so definitely get why others test early, particularly if they have had BFPs quite early on!

@SnookyPook Thank you for your response / sharing your experience, I am so sorry for your loss ❤️that’s the thing I can’t use OPK’s as they won’t work this soon but hopefully after my period I will get a negative test so I can use them again. I am really glad that you are coping with it well, I think time will be the healer, all the best on your TTC journey x
@Hankthehonk yes I am finding great comfort in all your responses , mumsnet is great ! Thank you for all your support. I am so sorry for your loss❤️ thank you for the break down of time scales that’s really helpful it just shows that everyone is so different and there is just no way of knowing but time will tell. Congratulations on your pregnancy !! That gives me hope and I wish you all the best. I do think naturally after a miscarriage it does make you anxious and a bit obsessive over things, I guess it makes us stronger in the end x

Hi, i have been following this and just catching up but seems to have ended in july lol has there been a new thread made?

@Supertrooper101 if you make one I would join :)

Hi i have x https://www.mumsnet.com/talk/conception/4896119-over-40s-ttc-after-a-missed-miscarrige?reply=129189229