Journey after miscarriage support thread Jan 2023

[Fairylight102]

I wondered if anyone out there would be interested in joining a thread for those who have recently experienced a miscarriage - a place to share how we’re feeling emotionally, physical recovery, becoming ready to try again (for those that want to), and hopefully one day positive stories of successful preganancies.

I’m 32 and recently had a miscarriage at 5-6 weeks of my first pregnancy. I was relieved to have conceived after quite a short time, because I have PCOS and was worried I might struggle to get pregnant.

My miscarriage was about 2 and half weeks ago now, and today is the first day I’ve not had any spotting/bleeding at all, and that has been a relief to feel like my body is moving on from it. I know it’s advisable to do a pregnancy test a few weeks after miscarriage, which is something I’m a bit anxious about doing as I’m fairly sure it will be an emotional thing to do.

Since it happened my sleep pattern and energy levels have been a bit all over the place. Some days I’ve just wanted to sleep all the time, which I think could be a mix of actual physical tiredness and also emotional tiredness/hormonal changes. I was back at work for the first time today, and it was helpful to have something else to focus on and motivate myself for.

I’ve restarted tracking my BBT to see what happens with my cycle returning, though I’m aware it could take a while to get back to normal. My husband and I are both on the same page that we’d like to try again once I’ve had one normal period, so I guess we’ll just see how things go and how we feel when we reach this point.

Sorry this has turned into a longer post than I expected! Anyway, if there’s anyone out there who’s had a similar experience recently and would like a place to share feelings/questions/advice it would be lovely to hear from others.

Hmmm apart from a zillion ultrasounds we haven’t had any fertility tests. Is anyone taking Agnes castus/vitex/ chaste berry to improve fertility xxx

@Chocolatebean @jalu47 Thankyou for replying. I haven’t been scanned since they found no embryo in my sac, just having blood tests every week and my hormone level was at 43 last week so it’s going down, I presume when it gets to 0 the bleeding will stop mainly? The nurses don’t seem concerned and I haven’t had any medication or d&c so I presume it’s maybe normal to still be bleeding bright red blood? Good luck to you both in the future xx

@kookyelephant could I ask what tests you have had? It anyone else who has had further testing? Although this is my first pregnancy/miscarriage I feel the pressure as turning 36 in March. I have contacted a local private fertility place and wondered what testing was normal to ask for from them or even my doctor?

My thyroid was borderline hypothyroidism just before I got pregnant and noone seemed worried, but everything online says it should be under 2.5 and I was over 5 (and yet within that labs "normal"). I feel like I should be making sure I get that under control before trying again... i also had lower progesterone but got pregnant so again noone was worried.

@CMG92 I was very similar. I had a small embryo of 2mm but no heartbeat and it just stayed that way. It took a further week to start bleeding for me but had no medication.

I'm still in quite a lot of pain but I have passed a lot today, including some big clots so I'm hoping I'm nearly done.

Hope yours all stops soon x

Welcome to any newcomers, sorry you find yourself here but I hope this group provides you with a bit of comfort - I know it definitely has for me.

sorry to hear some of you are struggling with your (second) cycles - it’s so frustrating not to know what’s going on with our bodies especially as we have so little control over the whole ttc journey as it is. I know for me knowing my cycle gave me at least a little sense of control/ownership so it’s shit when that is deregulated too. Sending you hugs!

Having been very impatiently waiting for my first period to return I decided to test yesterday, at 6 weeks post mc and got at bfp. Based on last bleed, ovulation pains and clear blue weeks test I’m somewhere between 5-6 weeks. I feel very grateful to have gotten pregnant again so quickly especially as it took us 13 cycles to fall pregnant the first time but would be lying if I said is wasn’t quite anxious this time. Anyway going to take advice from wise posters here and just take it one day at a time as worrying won’t change the outcome anyway. Sending love to all xx

@Saturnsmoon That's amazing! Congratulations 😬😬

@Saturnsmoon thats incredible massive congratulations so so happy for you xxx

Congratulations @Saturnsmoon wonderful news.

sorry to hear from the newcomers. nothing to report here, waiting for first period before we try again. I think I ovulated around day 18 (which is usual for me) interestingly I have a new Apple Watch which tracks BBT and I think I can see the rise. Trying to not get too obsessed (!) about it though. On an exercise mission at the moment, think it’s a distraction technique from all the emotions. Xxx

@Saturnsmoon that’s fantastic news, congratulations. I seem to remember from older posts that it took you a while to conceive initially, so this is extremely reassuring.
Wishing you all the best this time around, please keep us updated.

Can I ask those of you who typically get period cramps when they begin?

I get so down after ovulation as I start cramping literally 3-4 days afterwards, which just slowly increases until I get my period. Because of this, I just know that I’m not pregnant and end up having what feels like a dark cloud hanging over me until my period eventually comes (maybe a week later) and then I think right, let’s go again!

@Raey I only have cramps of that sort on the day my AF arrives.

Thank you for replying @TheBirdintheCave
I just don’t think it’s normal but have no idea where to turn for it.

@Saturnsmoon congratulations that's amazing! Good luck and try to relax (I know that's silly advice but try!) x

Thanks ladies 💕

@Saturnsmoon How are you feeling? Any symptoms? :)

@Saturnsmoon CONGRATULATIONS this is amazing news and I hope you are trying to enjoy it as much as possible

@Paperboats sure the three initial blood tests were... 1) clotting profile 2) anti cardiolipin antibodies (this is the one that's come back positive) 3) lupus anticoagulant screen

I'm currently coming off the heaviest period I have ever ever had, I'm mixed emotions to be honest, but feel relief as I feel like it's given me a real clear out!

As for trying again I think we will, tommys did say to me that we can and if we do get pregnant to see the doctor immediately for some type of blood thinners and I'll apparently be looked after as if I did have APS!

Xx

Morning ladies. Hmm my periods before MC were always clockwork since the mc and it’s only my 2nd one my cycle is shorter and bleeding is lighter . I had a scan 3 days before my period started and they said oh your lining is nice and thin and that I was mid cycle so I’m thinking my lining would have been too thin anyway. Argh I feel like the mc has screwed up everything xxx

I've noticed a couple have people have said but does anyone use their Apple Watch for tracking I can't get to grips with it and feel like I'm doing something wrong!

@Chocolatebean after my last mc I felt my cycle was irregular for a couple of months.. not that that's what you want to hear.. but I bought some cheap ov tests on Amazon and just did them daily... Ergh the crap we have to go through!!

Hi @kookyelephant thank you 😊 I don’t mind it being a but skew wiff for a bit as long as it sorts itself out . I use my I watch to track what would u like to know xxx

@Saturnsmoon amazing news, congratulations 🥳

AF unfortunately arrived, CD1 here we are. Not sure whether to just fork out on a ton of conception vitamins and lube to see if that makes a difference this cycle.

Aw @mollibu im so sorry mine was due today but started Sunday and it totally sucks doesn’t it xxx

@mollibu @Chocolatebean Sorry AF came :(

@Chocolatebean do I just have to add in the days that I'm on and symptoms and the rest sorts itself out? Xx

Yeah just put in your period that’s all y have to do u can add in the days u have sex and discharge details but it doesn’t change anything it goes by your period xxx

@Chocolatebean thank you, do you use this along side a tracking app? Or would you say you rate the tracking? Xx

Sorry for the questions x