TTC after miscarriage

[Winkle2020]

Hello Ladies

Please give me some hope and confidence. I have been through a miscarriage recently. Had d and c and then retained products. Had to wait for my first af 9 weeks after d and c. Now in the last scan I was told that almost everything is gone except that of a very very small 8mm tiny bit left which will eventually come out in the next cycle. Doc has asked me to wait for just one more cycle to ttc. Somehow in the length of this whole episode which dragged for 3 months now, I feel very hopeless and scared to death about ttc. I really want to hold a baby and have a second child. I sob everyday endlessly alone. There is no one to talk to, I have no sibling or close friends and lost my mother 2 years ago. I am a full time working women and it takes a toll on my emotional health. I am terrified and abosultely scared to death to go through this emotional pain again. When I was going through miscarriage this forum has been my single strong support and I have come back again to get some hope from you lovely ladies. Please help

@Hoppyhops I’m extremely sorry to hear that. I was advised against using FR because they’re so incredibly sensitive that the concentration of hcg can be very low and you’ll still get a positive on them. Whether you’re pregnant or your body is cleaning house. The surest way is a blood test to know if the pregnancy progresses. I tried to use to “line” method and ended up with a bin FULL of boxes and tests. And I was never even pregnant. It’s an arduous journey but I know we’ll get through it. And it’ll be amazingly worth it in the end. Just push all those negative thoughts to the back of your mind as best you can and take it one day at a time 💕(maybe a little wine wouldn’t be bad)

@Hoppyhops literally a bin FULL of it.

Also unrelated, a girl blocked me on social media this weekend because she was jealous of the fact that she was pregnant and didn’t want to be and thought that my husband and I were throwing out happiness in her face. 🤔 I guess it goes to show you that you never know what someone is going through and while you think you’re jealous of them, they’re green with envy for you...

Thanks @Bailee26 for the kind words- we’ll get there someday! 💕

I’ve become a POAS obsessive too. Your bin looks like my bedside draw. It’s crazy how easy it is to become fixated on it. I’m just trying to take a step back and wait for AF to show now- hope it won’t be long!

You’re right- nobody truly knows what anyone is going through!

Hi, I had a miscarriage yesterday. We conceived naturally (DH has poor motility and low count) but somehow we did it, I'm pretty sure the miscarriage is complete.

How do I know when my periods will start, or when is best to ttc?

I don't want to pester my GP with what's going on in the world and my local EPU aren't doing follow ups due to covid

@bailee26 and @hoppyhops sorry to hear about your chemical pregnancies. Must be horrible getting your hopes up and it getting taken away so quick.

@Octobersky19 dont start ttc again till you've had a negative test otherwise you could get a BFP from leftover hcg. Its recommended you wait for a period but that's just so its easier for them to date it. Whenever you feel ready physically and emotionally. Sorry to hear your going through this 💕

@octobersky19 Sorry to hear you’re going through this. Best to wait until any bleeding stops and, like @trying93 said, when you get negative tests. Be kind to yourself and rest up. It’s difficult physically as well as emotionally.

Update here: still no sign of AF properly turning up but I’ve had light cramping and spotting.

I took a FR this morning- got a darker line than before. Decided to say fuck it & also do a digital (I’m now a POAS hoarder & just keep them all backed up and ready!) It came up with 1-2 weeks. So.. maybe not a chemical, maybe a sticky?🤞🏼I know that’s not guaranteed though. I suppose it depends on whether or not this spotting becomes heavier. I’m trying to relax and just ‘let it be’... easier said than done but maybe I won’t reach for the wine just yet!

@Hoppyhops that's very exciting, a lot of people have spotting and it's all fine in the end anyway, really hope that's the case for you. I had definite implantation bleeding in my last pregnancy for 3-4 days round when AF was due (but it was more like brown discharge than red blood) so it could also be that.

@octobersky19 I had a missed miscarriage which was surgically managed 4 weeks ago. The hospital said to definitely avoid TTC until you've had a negative test, as if your test stays positive then it might be your miscarriage hasn't completed properly and there's a risk of infection etc. If you don't wait for a negative test then there's no way of knowing either way... but some women do just go for it. My negative test came after 3-3.5 weeks, and I still haven't had a period yet. Hoping we maybe get lucky this month anyway but won't know for a while, I guess, as AF can take a while to settle down - I think they say anything from 4-8 weeks is normal for AF to return.

@notalwaysalondoner Thanks for some reassurance. It has been around the time AF is due and was mainly brown with the odd streak of white pink -sorry for TMI! It seems to have eased now (touch wood) so I’m hoping it was implantation bleeding. Last time it spotted & then just became heavier due to MC. This time it is different. 🤞🏼

My AF took nearly 10 weeks to return after my MC in March- it is a difficult wait because you just want to know what’s going on with your body but it will come eventually. Xx

@Hoppyhops congratulations, all sounding positive. Fingers crossed for you

Think AF has come - 4.5 weeks after my surgical management. Glad that now I know where I am in my cycle, and hope we get lucky next month!

@Winkle2020 I've just been reading all this thread. Sorry to hear of your loss I had a miscarriage 3 weeks ago. I'm just wondering have you had any luck with ttc. I want to try again too xx

So turns out it wasn’t AF - just had light cramps and light bleeding for less than 8 hours. No idea what is going on... bit frustrating as I felt like I was hopefully back to normal and would start ovulating again and knowing when we should be DTD etc. Vaguely hoping we even got lucky this month and it was implantation bleeding but I did a test last Tuesday and it was negative so don’t think it was a pregnancy or a chemical. Guess I’ll just have to be patient...

@notalwaysalondoner Hmmm either your hormones are still settling or it’s possibly implantation bleeding. Maybe give it a few days and try a test again. It may have been too early last time. 🤞🏼

@notalwaysalondoner sounds like it might have been implantation for you. Give it a day or 2 and test good luck

Anyone care to update?

@notalwaysalondoner that’s true. time reveals all, i’m very hopeful for you!

@Babybean1216 I’m very sorry for your loss, but you’ve come to the right place. I don’t know where I would be without the support of these ladies. It can really be challenging to go through.

@Baileys123 thank you I have been reading loads of threads and they are really helping me.

I had some implantation bleeding with my last pregnancy though and it was much lighter, nothing like a period, more like slightly pink or brown discharge. This time I had one big clot (sorry TMI) but then used a tampon so not sure what the rest was like as I thought it was AF. It started at about 10am and stopped by 8pm I think. Just don’t know what’s going on... sigh...

@notalwaysalondoner every pregnancy is different. I have 2 kids and had a chemical and miscarriage and never had implantation bleeding on any of them. Dont over think it. Are you late

I had light implantation spotting as well, I spotted pretty much the whole time so maybe I don’t count. But my periods were super weird afterwards. Very light and on and off.

Hey all,
Hope you're all doing well. Congratulations on the BFPs ☺️. I should be 6+4 but bleeding has started... Exactly the same as last time so I'm not holding out much hope. I'll ring the GP tomorrow, not that there's anything they can do. If it's happening it's happening 😔. Never imagined TTC being like this... Its not like this on the movies 😂

@IWM20 Omg it’s not!!! I was just telling my husband in the movies it’s like you have unprotected sex one time and then you end up pregnant. Sometimes I wish it were more like that. I got a fortune cookie that said “the reward is in the journey and not the destination”. So I’ve internalized maybe this is happening for a reason and to be grateful for it. And I am! I’m grateful for trials but gosh can this not be so trying 😅

Maybe might have gotten a faint possibility of a positive on my pregmate this morning. Second strip is only a few minutes after so i don’t think I see anything there. Period due in 10 days so I’ll keep testing I think. Having almost like period cramps today (lots of discharge tmi)

@IWM20 sorry - hope it turns out to be ok. I know, they say 50% of pregnancies are unplanned and I’m like, how?!?! Out of my 5 good friends who’ve had babies or TTC, 2 got pregnant first month but the others took 7 and 9 months and I’m still trying at 10 months after one miscarriage... and none were unplanned...

@Babybean1216 I can’t really be “late” as I’m still first cycle after a miscarriage so no idea if everything has settled down yet. I’ll do a cheap test tomorrow and see...