TTC after miscarriage

[Winkle2020]

Hello Ladies

Please give me some hope and confidence. I have been through a miscarriage recently. Had d and c and then retained products. Had to wait for my first af 9 weeks after d and c. Now in the last scan I was told that almost everything is gone except that of a very very small 8mm tiny bit left which will eventually come out in the next cycle. Doc has asked me to wait for just one more cycle to ttc. Somehow in the length of this whole episode which dragged for 3 months now, I feel very hopeless and scared to death about ttc. I really want to hold a baby and have a second child. I sob everyday endlessly alone. There is no one to talk to, I have no sibling or close friends and lost my mother 2 years ago. I am a full time working women and it takes a toll on my emotional health. I am terrified and abosultely scared to death to go through this emotional pain again. When I was going through miscarriage this forum has been my single strong support and I have come back again to get some hope from you lovely ladies. Please help

@LittleGem638 hey little gem, really feel sorry for what you have gone through. It’s emotionally draining and a horrendous experience for me. For me it has put my self worth to drain. I was on a terrible stressful time waiting for periods to arrive as I had retained products after d and c. 2 months later my period arrived with full force. We wanted to try but then we also felt like we should leave one more month which is January. Although we decided this we kinda slipped on my ovulation day and that’s the only time we dtd. I know it’s not enough but I also sometimes think that my DS was born just after doing once so I am unable to rule that out.

I was symptom spotting like crazy. I am counting each and every day till my af is due. I don’t speak to anyone at house, can’t do any routine work, I am like a mad woman obsessed on what’s going on. I sometimes think it would be easier to see what’s going on inside visually somewhere on a screen so that we don’t guess work all the time
This is really hard on me. Sorry for so much ranting but I am just too upset about the whole waiting and going crazy period

Hope we all get our bfps next cycle. Let’s stay together

Honestly you guys are my real support. Can’t speak about this to anyone else

@Trying93 are you still spotting ? What’s happening ?

@Winkle2020 I feel exactly the same and find it difficult to explain how I feel to others without sounding crazy, and even when I have they have told me to just 'see what happens'. Its just the endless waiting and then the disappointment alongside that mixed in with the grief of our loss and we are still going through it with hormones getting back to normal (so no wonder we are feeling the way we do).
I hope we all get our BFPs sooner rather than later so we can forget all this feeling of being in limbo and look forward to the future

Awe really,I was hoping it might be quicker this time after having D & C.
Yeah this was my second miscarriage in 2019,It took 8 weeks for hcg to drop the first time but I had retained products then,so am hoping it's quicker this time x

Hi little gem.sorry for your loss.
You don't sound crazy & I think it's totally normal to feel so consumed with getting pregnant after experiencing these tragic losses.
I finally got a letter inviting me for counselling today,I hadn't heard from the hospital & it's been 5 weeks on Sunday.
I've just discovered 4louis & aching arms on Facebook.It seems that there are far too many others going through the same as us.

Little gem I'm glad it didn't take so long for af to return..although I know it wasn't really what you had hoped for,how are you guys all working out your fertile days?

I finally got a negative test 2 days ago which I was shocked was so soon as I only stopped bleeding from my miscarriage last week. We have been ttc since the bleeding has stopped and been doing it regularly but it's hard to work out fertile days. I don't want to get ovulation tests and make it too strict. But I have been getting ovulation symptoms. Just hope it works out 🤞🏻

Spotting seems to be away but still got cramps. I get spotting some months, usually its 12-24 hours before my period starts and it's more than what I've had this month.

My cycles are all over the place since my mc. Anything between 29-34. CD 31 today so few more days to wait and see.

@katy0000 it's hard it totally changes you want AF to show so up you can start trying again

@Winkle2020 I worry all the time about having another miscarriage. I should probably worry about actually getting pregnant again first but it's always on my mind. Dont know if I could face going through it all again

Didnt realise this was on a second page and I'm catching up now 😂

@LittleGem638 sorry to hear everything you've been through. Glad you've joined us we can all support each other

Hello ladies, I am just an emotional queen today actually from yesterday. It’s 13 dpo and looking at all my crankiness I am sure af will show her face tomorrow or day after. If the witch arrives then I will think of this as a new chance. My symptoms today are watery Cm, emotional and pelvic pain

@Winkle2020 its such an emotional rollercoaster. Especially when you dont know if the symptoms are AF or pregnancy.

Sounds like your thinking sensibly and not getting your hopes up but your not out until AF shows up 🤞

How long after a miscarriage did you all get your first AF? I'm using the Flo app which is accurate for me but don't know how accurate now after the miscarriage 😘

Arghh this stage you ladies are at is quite scary..I'll be in this position soon,af was today so nearly 5 weeks after my D&C.
After the miscarriage which I had before this one it took about 8 weeks for it to return.
I'm glad I can start to work out ovulation days but it's still sad..and I'm terrified like you all are that a positive test is only the start of a long & frightening journey 😕

@dm14 I got my af exactly in 2.5 months after d and c but for me the problem was I had retained products and instead of doing a second d and c my docs waited for me to naturally pass it which I did luckily. I was asked to wait for 2 cycles after my d and c. So on 20th if my af shows to then we are ok to try again

@Katy0000 don’t worry let’s all be together in this journey and get our bfps are you going to wait for another cycle or you have to try after this one ?

Just thought I should share this one to our group 😊

For the woman whose husband makes an "extra stop" after work every evening.

For the woman who is mourning the loss of a pregnancy that nobody else knew about.

For the woman who still leads from the front, although she’s lost inside.

For the woman who was fired for her fourth time late because she has been awake for a straight week with a sick child.

For the single mom who doesn't know how the utilities are going to stay on this month.

For the woman who has gone through 2 IVF's and has tried for five years without success but still shows up to every baby shower for her friends.

For the woman who still hasn't forgiven herself for the abortion that she had 20 years ago.

For the woman who has a line of judging eyes at her and her children as she counts out coins or has to put something back at the supermarket.

For the woman that opens the door to the news of her husband being killed overseas three weeks before he was to return home.

For the woman that lives with a quiet anxiety because nobody understands what you could possibly be stressed about.

For the woman that gives to her family all day- everyday and just needs a break.

For the woman that smiles at strangers all day in public- but weeps silently every night.

For the woman who has wanted to end it all but found strength to carry on.

For the woman that heard the rumour about herself at church today.

For the woman sleeping next to a stranger every night.

For the woman whose genetics will never allow her to look like the ones in the magazines.

For the woman that endures one broken relationship after another because there was no father around to teach her what love looks like.

For the woman raising a fatherless daughter and praying that history doesn't repeat itself.

For the woman who loves with all her heart who’s desperate to be loved.

For every single woman that cries in the shower so that nobody else can see. Because if you aren't strong, nobody is.

Just because the water washes your tears doesn't mean that you don't cry. Just because you cry doesn’t mean that you’re not strong enough to handle it.

I am you. I see you. I am with you, I cry with you. I love you.

• Author: Brittany Latham

Oh wow,I've never seen that poem.thankyou

Nobody at the hospital advised me re trying again.I decided to wait until after my first period just because I didn't last time.
I get my test results & post mortem results in a few weeks so maybe I could wait until after that but I will probably just leave it to fate this cycle.The one after that I will probably start to work out fertile days so long as I don't get any news to advise me otherwise.
Why did you have to wait 2 cycles Winkle?x

I just got told to try again when I feel ready they didn't tell me to wait until I've had a period even thou I've heard it's best to work out dates. We didn't try when I fell pregnant last it was just a nice surprise and I already feel like this time there's a bit more pressure because we both know how much we want a baby now. I think it will be a lot easier to work out fertile days after a period thou but hopefully it works out before then

My period came 4 weeks after my mc. Mine happened naturally and I didnt get any treatment so not sure if that affects it

I'm out this month. AF has showed up

@Trying93 oh I am so sorry, speaking of that the red witch has arrived but then the new cycle opens up for you. We will stay with you and you will get your bfp this cycle. Hope you are handling it ok

I am due tomorrow. I have more af symptoms from yesterday so anytime

I'm sorry trying.I know you have that due date looming 💕

Hello ladies, I am so put off today, it’s 15 dpo I have no sign of af and got bfn on poas. The last thing I want to deal is getting an irregular periods after d and c. Do any of you think it’s normal ? Please talk to me

After some bleeding yesterday I'm back to spotting but can feel it AF definitely on the way.

@winkle2020 totally normal. My cycles are still all over the place 6 months after my mc. Do a test in a few days if its still not here

Yes I think normal too.
Shame about the negative test though.
After my miscarriage earlier this year,& before my last pregnancy I did get a negative test but a few days later I got a positive so it is possible.
Its hard not to stress but obviously stress can delay af too...xx

@Katy0000 Hello Katy which dpo did you get your positive line? I am still hoping

@Trying93 the last thing I want to deal now is irregular periods...I want to scream and cry...why this is not ending yet....what was going on with your cycles? did you have a long one or short ones?