BFP after IVF - anyone want to join me in the wait for first scan?

[HopefulllHolly]

Sensitive

Hi everyone,
I’ve just had our first cycle of IVF and although we had very slim odds of it working (low AMH, low AFC, male factor, which led to only 2 mature eggs which thankfully led to one perfect day 5 blast). We are absolutely amazed and over the moon that it worked despite everything, but I am really struggling with the wait for first scan. I almost feel with infertility (we TTC for 6/7 years) that it does make you anxious and I’m finding the wait to my first scan (6th June) unbearable. I don’t want to seem ungrateful but I really wish I could enjoy it or relax a little but instead I am worrying about miscarriage and things I can’t control. For me this has been the worst bit of IVF so far, and I’d love to just be able to be happy so I don’t look back (if it does work) and wish that I hadn’t been so anxious and scared.

Is anyone else in the same boat who wants to keep me company? 🥹 Or can provide some tips on how to distract myself and cope better? I know there’s nothing I can do to change the outcome and what will be will be, but I don’t think I’ve ever worried so much in my life.

Thank you 🙏

@Fluffyted wondered where you had disappeared to! Hope you are ok?
I too have found out what we are having and having a boy 🩵🩵

@summerchild92 those initial bloods look good, me though would want to have the second one to check it's doubling.
Twinges and cramps are perfectly normal. Have had some form of pain most days! My clinic said in the earlier days it's bubba bedding in and then later on it's everything stretching to accommodate baby.

@HopefulllHolly how are you now, recovered from Covid? My DP has had flu-like symptoms and I've got whatever he had now. Just had a 3 hr sleep on the sofa!

Does anyone know if I can take strepsils. Throat is soo sore? A quick google search gives me conflicting info.

@DippyDuck19 Oh no you poor thing! I was rough from Saturday to Tuesday but feel a lot better now - have a stuffy nose and still no taste but otherwise not too bad. Not 100% though. No you can’t have Strepsils I don’t think - I read on the pack in Sainsbury’s the other day it says to consult doctor first so sounds like it’s probably a no. Really annoying when you feel rubbish! I just stuck with paracetamol - two in the morning and two in the evening so wasn’t taking every 4 hours. Plenty of rest and lots of fluids was what got me through. Definitely sounds like Covid - sore throat was horrible for the first 3 days and then turned to a bad cold, then chesty cough.

Sorry youve got it - hope you feel better quickly!

Thanks @HopefulllHolly everything I googled said they don't test on pregnant women so they could be safe but they don't know. A post on MN said Halls were fine (told by a pharmacist). Usually when I'm unwell I can take all the cold and flu tablets / lemsips etc and nothing helps! I'm only going to take paracetamol if I develop a fever. At the moment I'm fine. Just a very mild headache and sore throat. The sleep has helped! Thankfully it's the weekend and I have nothing planned apart from sorting the spare room but that can wait.

@DippyDuck19 Rest up! Sleep was definitely the thing that helped me most. Hope you feel better soon! 😘

Congrats on the great news @Snowdrop131 and @Natty2!

And congrats @HopefulllHolly on the lovely news you are having a girl!!

I'm so anxious for my scan on Tuesday. I've been having what I think is ligament pain which apparently can happen with subsequent pregnancies but I freaked myself out thinking it was ectopic, I had to ring my clinic whilst I'm on holiday for reassurance but I don't have any of the other classic ectopic symptoms and I'm not doubled up in pain with it. I'm 7+1 now and the nurse said at this stage if it was ectopic I would be displaying a lot more symptoms so I'm trying to take comfort in that but still feeling anxious. We are back in the UK late tomorrow. I feel terrible as I feel like anxiety is ruining me enjoying this pregnancy so far, I'm hoping it will get easier after my scan?

hi all 👋
i’ve been a lurker here for 3 weeks now and thought i’d take the plunge and post seeing as everyone is so reassuring and lovely🥹
i’m 6 weeks pregnant with our first baby, first ivf cycle using the only embryos we had left (retrieved 21, but sadly only 2 got to blast and they were ungradeable so transferred both to increase our chances)!

my 6-7 week scan is on monday (3days away), and to be frank i have been a mess since we found out. i thought all i wanted was a positive test and id be happy, i never anticipated this gut wrenching anxiety filled wait. reading everyone’s scans/scenarios in here has helped me through so thank you🥰
only a few more days to get through 😫

so i am in the boat with you @oliviagrace2307 !! 🫶🫶

Hey @jas1996 Congratulations on your successful IVF round and getting your BFP. There’s not much I can say to reassure you other than we’ve all been there and it truly is a horrible wait for your first scan, but you’re so nearly there! Well done for getting through the tough few weeks - it’s so hard just going off a positive test and a bit of hope. You’ll have seen that almost all of us have had a great first scan, so 99% of the time it all goes amazingly and you’ll see your little bean with a heart beating away. I’m sure yours will be the same! And you have company here to try keep you sane as pregnancy (especially after IVF) seems like a series of painful nervous anxiety filled 2 or 3 week waits between scans, appointments and milestones! But you’ve got this! It’ll be ok! ☺️ So first scan is Monday?

@oliviagrace2307 Oh bless you, I hope it’s not ruined your holiday? You’d definitely have a lot more symptoms at 7 weeks with an ectopic, so try and have a bit of faith in that. I think with each scan it gets slightly easier - but I won’t lie to you, I’ve been anxious at every step, but the height of anxiety isn’t as high the further I get. So it does better slightly easier but I think IVF and wanting a baby so badly brings a whole world of anxiety because it’s something you want so badly. Try and have a good weekend and keep yourself busy and then you’ve just got Monday to get through before your scan and after that you’ll feel better I’m sure. ☺️ Sending hugs xx

When you all were going through IVF, did you share it with people? We did, with a few people, because I felt like support was more important than keeping it secret.

Never expected it to work straight away though and now our parents etc are going to ask about it and it feels too weird telling people this early. IVF takes the mystery and privateness out of the whole situation doesn't it!

@jas1996 welcome and congratulations on your bfp. Hoping your scan goes well on Monday x

@lemonyfox family and my work colleagues knew I was going through IVF. We didn't tell anyone we were having a transfer - I wanted to keep that bit a secret. We told parents and siblings at 5 weeks as I was so anxious about miscarriage I rather they enjoy the excitement for as long as it lasted rather than just finding out we'd used the embryos and it hadn't worked. I also told my manager around this time too as I needed a risk assessment at work. I've told a few more close friends after the viability scan around 8 weeks. These are people who would support us if we were to miscarry. The wider family and work colleagues will be told after my 12 week scan.

@lemonyfox Yeah all my family and close friends plus my bosses at work know we were doing IVF as they are my support network and I knew I needed them throughout. As it was our first cycle they all knew all the dates, and yeah I guess it means that we haven’t had a secret bubble for a while which feels like added pressure at times. But having said that it’s been so lovely to have people rooting for us and getting so excited when it worked (especially when we were just full of fear). If it had been a second or third cycle we spoke and said we wouldn’t have told them dates for things as it does add to the pressure! But I’m soooo glad everyone knows as it’s meant we’ve really got to enjoy pregnancy with them and they are all so happy for us, it makes it feel more real. But definitely a personal choice I think! ☺️

I’ve contacted my consultant this morning about the 6-7 week scan and he called me in tomorrow morning 😶 my anxiety shot through the roof now so I’m in the same camp as you @oliviagrace2307 and @jas1996

it’s only going to be 6+1 so I wonder whether we’ll be able to see a heartbeat and all that 🤦🏻‍♀️

so sorry to hear that you weren’t able to enjoy your time away and your pregnancy as much due to these pains @oliviagrace2307 😬

@lemonyfox Yes, a lot of people went on this journey with us too because we needed their understanding over the past year to reschedule things, pull out of things and so on. It was weird telling my family, siblings at 5 weeks, as well as some close friends and ivf friends because they asked; they knew I was doing a second cycle. It did take away the privacy of it all but it was nice to share the excitement and the worry, and most people were cautiously optimistic for us so that was a relief. I didn’t need to manage their expectations. I suppose we’re all older and know that the first trimester is the riskiest.

But one reason why I regret telling people this early is because my mother in law has already started with the unsolicited advice (don’t lift heavy stuff and she was referring to a shopping bag under a kilo, don’t touch the neighbour’s cat as you’ll get toxoplasmosis) 😂 and she’s asking my husband every day how I’m doing and when the next scan is and so on. She is more anxious by nature so it checks out, but it made me realise that everyone from now on will feel entitled to give me unsolicited advice and I didn’t even get to avoid that for the first trimester.

Hey guys, welcome to everyone new! Catching up on all the messages now.

just back from the 12 week dating scan now. All looking good - although measuring 13 weeks exactly instead of 12+2! Change of due date now to Jan 11th.

Opted for the trisomy screening so had bloods and the sonographer measured the NT fluid at the back of babies neck, everything looks fine but have to wait for the bloods to be analysed etc. no news is good news for this one!

Thanks everyone, seems like we're in the same boat. OTD is Monday so as long as we're still testing positive by then we're going to tell parents afterwards and my best friend who's been amazing support for me through it all.

Just quickly catching up from yesterday!

@HopefulllHolly awww that's really sweet! So lovely you can talk to your baby girl, knowing she's a girl! I can't wait to find out what we are having, though it won't be until the 20 week scan 🙈
I'm sure your 12 week scan will go totally fine & well. I know exactly how you feel though - mine is on Monday!
I think buying stuff around 20 weeks is a good idea, I'm so tempted to start now though. We need everything!! But I'm so excited to start buying baby things, will make this seem so real.
I'm doing ok thank you, the nausea has got much worse for me so I'm slightly worried about that as it should be easing up. But hopefully it's just another normal thing.

@DippyDuck19 I'm ok thank you! Just plodding along with the nausea attached to me allll day. Hoping it's nothing to worry about it too much.
Aww so cute you're having baby boy! 🩵 it must be such a lovely feeling knowing what you are having.
How are you feeling today? Sounds like you've been suffering with a horrid sore throat!

@oliviagrace2307 I had ligament pain & did the exact same as you!! I'm sure yours is ligament & everything is good just normal pain!
Good luck with your scan on Tuesday.

@lemonyfox we haven't told anyone! It wasn't that it was a secret, it was more we just wanted to get our heads around the whole process and know what was happening. And then we kind of just kept it quiet. But it probably would have been nice to have extra support and to talk things through with family.
We haven't told anyone we are pregnant yet, we are going to have our 12 week scan first and then tell our families ☺️

@LouP87 this is so exciting!! How amazing, what fab news. I'm so glad it went well for you. Awww an early Jan baby!! I'm sure the results will be totally fine, just another waiting game!

@Fluffyted sore throat and head seems better today but exhaustion has returned! Everything aches!
I was also hoping the nausea and Vomiting should be easing up but seems to have returned in full force the last 3 days too after feeling pretty normal for the previous week. Am 12 weeks today, patiently waiting for the pregnancy "glow" here

Yay @LouP87 sorry I had such a busy day and forgot to check my list of peoples appointments! So glad it all went well! Big healthy baby on board - I didn’t think they changed the dates with IVF? When will you hear back on the tests? Sure everything is perfect!

@Fluffyted Awww thank you! We need to buy everything too - I’ve just made a list and done rough costs so now saving manically for that and maternity funds (even though I get 6 months paid Mat leave so I’m very lucky!). I want to take a full year off so need the money for the other 6 months.

@ThePeachGoose Good luck for the scan tomorrow! Hope everything goes well! ☺️ I’m sure it will!! 😊😊😊

Ive been out all day and not sat down and my hips are soooo sore! Is this normal?! Weirdly my pregnancy symptoms the last two days have been much stronger even though I thought they get better in second trimester and I’m almost there! Felt nausea all day yesterday and felt really rubbish with it so now have to carry a pack of hobnobs around with me to constantly nibble on. 🐷

@LouP87 sorry missed your post about your scan. Baby had a growth spurt! Glad all is ok.

@ThePeachGoose good luck for your scan.

@HopefulllHolly my symptoms have worsened in the past 3 days. I have to carry sugar free polo mints with me to stop the sickness! Also have hip and back pain - feel like it's too early lol doesn't bode well for later on!!!

That’s fantastic @LouP87 !

Thanks @HopefulllHolly and @DippyDuck19 I’ll let you all know how it goes 😬

Just catching up on these! Thank you everyone, anxiety is back again until next scan 😅 but private scan booked for 21st and midwife appt on 22nd so hoping all stays well until then!

@AnnieStar12 great news on your scan and best of luck for the NIPT test. Has everyone gone privately for this to do it in advance?

@summerchild92 I didn't have bloods but that sounds good! I still keep having quite alot of twinges and cramping which the nurse said is normal, although it still worries me when it happens!

Best of luck for your scan @ThePeachGoose and this week @jas1996 @oliviagrace2307

@HopefulllHolly hope your nausea is not too bad today, when is your 12 weeks?

@DippyDuck19 Oh noooo! You’ve done a long slog of sickness now! I hope it doesn’t last long for you. I was quite surprised to have it back and worse than before.

@Natty2 I’m 12 weeks on Thursday but have my 12 week scan on Weds - scared! I hope she’s ok in there! I feel a bit bad I over exerted myself yesterday as I’ve got a banging headache from not drinking my 4 litres of water and had a bit of tummy ache last night. Hope it’s nothing!

My bump is getting really pronounced now - especially afternoon and evening. It was definitely bloat before but now it’s not. People have started noticing it which is crazy! First thing my mum said yesterday was “oh my god your tummy!” It’s quite nice but I thought it wasn’t meant to really show until after 16 weeks?!

Good news, ladies! We saw a heartbeat! Such a relief, and of course you’re the first people I’m telling 😂

The doctor has told me to take it easy for the time being and avoid activities that elevate my heart rate to be on the safe side.

One down and two more to go. The very best of luck @jas1996 and @oliviagrace2307 !

That’s great news @ThePeachGoose 😊 Are you discharged from your clinic now?

Lots of scans this week again! Think there’s 5 of us with them. Hope they are all perfect! 😍

@ThePeachGoose congratulations! Soo pleased for you!!!! It's such a relief when you see the heartbeat.

@HopefulllHolly am so fed up of being sick! The vomiting this week is so much worse it's caused stress incontinence. Have ordered a birthing ball to add in some extra pelvic floor exercises! Hoping it will help with the hip and back pain too!
The insomnia has returned the last 2 days as well. Wide awake at 4am and can't get back to sleep.