BFP after IVF - anyone want to join me in the wait for first scan?

[HopefulllHolly]

Sensitive

Hi everyone,
I’ve just had our first cycle of IVF and although we had very slim odds of it working (low AMH, low AFC, male factor, which led to only 2 mature eggs which thankfully led to one perfect day 5 blast). We are absolutely amazed and over the moon that it worked despite everything, but I am really struggling with the wait for first scan. I almost feel with infertility (we TTC for 6/7 years) that it does make you anxious and I’m finding the wait to my first scan (6th June) unbearable. I don’t want to seem ungrateful but I really wish I could enjoy it or relax a little but instead I am worrying about miscarriage and things I can’t control. For me this has been the worst bit of IVF so far, and I’d love to just be able to be happy so I don’t look back (if it does work) and wish that I hadn’t been so anxious and scared.

Is anyone else in the same boat who wants to keep me company? 🥹 Or can provide some tips on how to distract myself and cope better? I know there’s nothing I can do to change the outcome and what will be will be, but I don’t think I’ve ever worried so much in my life.

Thank you 🙏

@AnnieStar12 Same! Hours of googling! I’ve distracted myself this week by reading pregnancy threads and reading about birth instead - and post birth! Rather than the doom of miscarriage and it’s really helped with my mental health! I’ve also made a list of things I need to buy later down the line and saved a million links to cute clothes 😂 She’s going to be one spoilt baby!!

I just realised I got my date wrong and I’m 8+6 today so am actually already past the dreaded same day as last miscarriage. So that makes me feel better as I’m now officially further along!!

@HopefulllHolly so exciting looking at baby stuff. That’s great you’re planning ahead I think that’s a good idea. I have started to think about how to rearrange the spare room to make it a nursery but that’s as far as I’ve got.

@AnnieStar12 Ahhh that’s amazing! Your day of dread has already passed without you even realising ☺️ Yeah I need to measure up the room baby is going to be going in and started a little mood board on Pinterest with what I want to decorate it like. Surprisingly girly considering I am not very girly myself! Thinking maybe a sage green but not sure. It’s nice to be busy brained with other things than reading negative things. 😊 Definitely makes the day goes faster!

Im 11 weeks today, 6 more days until my 12 week scan. Just need to get through the weekend which is busy as my parents have moved up north and so going to see them and tell them what we are having which will be lovely! Then it’ll just be a few days. Breaking my week right up in to chunks helps manage the madness 😂😂

Congrats @lemonyfox @summerchild92.

@HopefulllHolly glad to see your feeling much better. Kind of wish I did the NIPT now as now I'm worrying about the screening. Am also keeping busy and was looking a boys clothes last night - definitely not as cute as the girls clothes though. And also thinking sage green for the nursery. We are clearing the spare room this weekend (it's currently our laundry room). I love decorating and it's the one room we haven't done since we moved in. Might decorate it if screening results ok but then won't start filling it up until 20 weeks!

@DippyDuck19 Awww - to be honest I don’t think the tests make any difference - if something happens then it’ll happen! I’m sure your screening will be totally fine - if you’re panicking you could get NIPT privately this week?
Oh I’ve seen some cute stuff for little boys - I’ve gone all gooey over the Isla and Fraser knitted baby grows 🥹 why are they all so sweet!! 🥲
Love decorating (well the design side of decorating) too! Really looking forward to doing the nursery! Sage green is such a nice colour for nurseries too - not too gender specific which I like. We’ll have to compare end results when we do them 😊😊

@HopefulllHolly @DippyDuck19 you guys are making me so excited to find out pink or blue ☺️☺️ though can’t think nurseries yet- to daunting with the amount of stuff I need to move around! Thinking of turning the earmarked room into a big girl room for dd so she can feel involved and get a new bed and “help” choose what she wants, hopefully she will enjoy. She keeps saying she wants a sister, tho im pretty convinced it’s a brother 😂

@HopefulllHolly ooo just have a look at the Isla and Fraser website 😍😍

@Edf I have lots of stuff to move and no idea where to put it. We are going to hire a skip I think and just have a major clear out!!! How old is your DD? That will be nice to get her involved!

Hey thanks scan went good today and wee heart beat seen🥰 . Just the 5 weeks until next scan now. 🤦🏻‍♀️

Yayyyy I’m so pleased for you @Snowdrop131 ☺️such a relief!

Hope you’re ok too @Natty2 thinking of you!

Hi all, scan also went well today and saw the little heart beating away 🥹🥹

They measured me at 6+5 but then discharge letter says 7 weeks as it 'looked 7 weeks?!' I thought it was 6+6 so that seems bang on anyway!

Pleased to have reached this milestone first and will book a private scan in another 2 weeks or so when I should be 9-10 weeks 🤞🥰

did anyone else do the same around then??

Yayyyy @Natty2 glad everything was ok and baby measuring ok! They are so small the measuring can’t be that accurate I don’t think!
I had a scan at 9+4 weeks and it was great. 😊

@Snowdrop131 @Natty2 fantastic news, and congratulations! You all give me so much hope for my scan next week.

I’m slightly scared of it because a friend got her positive from a FET just 2-3 weeks before me and it was heartbreaking to hear that her embryo stopped developing right before the viability scan 😔 hard to get that thought out of my mind now, but all your experiences show that it’s actually not that common. Especially if my symptoms are all here still and there’s no red bleeding 🤞🏻 a few more days to go and as you say, weekends go by faster.

@ThePeachGoose Of course there’s always a risk of it not working - but there’s more chance of it sticking than not - which kind of helped. And those that don’t work like your friends (so sad for her 🥺) would never have been a healthy baby, so there’s a little comfort in that. Hang in there! I’m sure you’ll be fine ☺️ definitely a good sign you have symptoms and no bleeding or anything! The first scan wait is so so hard, but the relief is just amazing after! 3 more days to get through and one of those doesn’t count because it’s Saturday ☺️☺️

@summerchild92 good luck tomorrow! It’s really positive that your lines are getting darker, but I totally get your anxiety, I had a chemical last year too. It’s not easy, but if you can, try to think of it as that was last year’s embryo and this is this year's embryo, it has a fresh new chance and a world of possibilities. Fingers crossed!

@AnnieStar12 it’s so triggering to go through previously difficult pregnancy moments but it’s brilliant that you went through it without even realising it 👏🏻 not long now and you’ll be at 12 weeks!

@HopefulllHolly thank you, you’re always so positive and supportive! And I love your system of counting lol can’t wait to get there

Thank you @HopefulllHolly @ThePeachGoose 🥰

I'm so sorry to hear about your friend. I was so anxious about that happening today especially as I really feel like my symptoms have been coming and going and not as strong as I expected.

Immediately after the scan I said to dh I hope our next scan goes well (already worried!!) and he reminded me that for today we need to take this as a win and be happy we've got this far for the first time ever!

I hope everything goes perfectly for you next week!

@Natty2 @Snowdrop131 soo glad your scans went well!

@ThePeachGoose the wait for the first scan is the hardest. It's positive you have symptoms. I'm sure all will be fine.

@Natty2 yes, it’s a good day to stop and celebrate, and you can start worrying from tomorrow onwards. It’s really unnerving sometimes how symptoms come and go 😅 but I tell myself that it’s normal and I try not to dwell on it.

I’ll let you know how it all goes ofc

@Natty2 Congratulations, you're passed a big milestone! Enjoy the moment :)

@ThePeachGoose What day is your scan? And how far will you be by then?

I ended up booking myself in for a same-day scan today as I was already in a bit of a panic and then I heard from a friend that she'd learnt she was having a miscarriage which made me so sad for her, but also extremely anxious for myself . I just got home from my scan - I was in and out in 10 minutes! Saw a perfect heartbeat and baby measuring 1 day ahead. The lady doing the scan was so lovely and even offered for me to come back for a free scan after my NHS 12 week one! Now just countdown to the NIPT tests next week..

That’s fantastic @AnnieStar12 i hope that this will make your waiting easier until 12 weeks. And how awesome to get an extra free scan 😆 yeah, when a friend is going through miscarriage management at the same time, it’s hard to shake off that thought. But it’s so nice to have so many positive stories here to balance it out.

My consultant basically told me to contact him at 6 weeks to get me in for a scan, so I’ll be contacting him on Sat. From there, it will most likely be something like “come in tomorrow” or “come in on Monday”. So i don’t have an exact date unfortunately.

Hey lovelies ❤️

Sorry I disappeared for a while. Just quickly caught up on allll the messages! (Quite a few) I missed some major things @hopefullsosbry I'm so sorry to hear you've had a horrible time and it's bad news!! This is awful, I'm so gutted for you 😞💔 you are such a strong person, you've got this!! You will get your baby & you'll be the best mumma in the world ... sending you so much love! ❤️ good luck with your next egg collection!

@HopefulllHolly awww cute a little girl 🩷🎀
I'd be sooo tempted to start buying all the cutest little girl bits now!

Does anyone else know what they are having? I haven't done the NIPT test but silently wishing I had now!!

Sorry, I'm not being rude nor replying to all the messages I've missed! There's just too many 🙈

Good luck to everyone who has scans / midwife appointments coming up!! I hope they all go well xx

Hi everyone,
I had a beta tests today and it came back positive 🥰🥰🍀 it is 364iu, and today is day 15 post a 3 day embryo transfer (so much like day 13 post 5day embryo transfer). How does that sound? I don’t know if I’ll go for a second test as I don’t want to stress any more 🫣
I called for an ultrasound which should be in the next two-three weeks … so I’ll try to stop worrying until then.

I keep having some twinges on the left side … hope that’s normal. Is anyone taking magnesium? 🫣

@summerchild92 364 is perfect, congratulations! I can confirm a second test would be stressful 😆 but it depends on you and how much you want to know or be in control. The outcome will be the same though

Twinges are normal and a good sign. We’ve been discussing here that the side pains are even more normal after a fresh transfer as the ovaries take ages to come down. My consultant was not at all bothered by it when i asked him.

I just switched to proceive first trimester and drink lots of water, and eat fruit and veggies for fibre and vitamins

@Fluffyted I wondered where you had gone! Thank you! I’m still in shock she’s a little girl in there, but I’ve been chatting to her and feel much more bonded now which is lovely. Just hope my 12 week scan on Wednesday is ok and I’ve not been talking to nothing!
Definitely hard not to buy everything girlie now! I think 20 weeks will be my point of buying stuff and Black Friday sales I think for the big buys we need like pram and car seat and bedroom furniture.
How are you doing? You’re 12 weeks now aren’t you! When’s your dating scan? Hope you’re doing ok!

@summerchild92 thats great news! Congrats! I didn’t have bloods taken but I think having them would have given me more to worry about so I’d probably not have gotten the second ones. One less thing to fixate on! Great your scan is in a couple of weeks, that’s so lovely seeing the little bean on the screen 🥹 something to focus on the next couple of weeks! Xx