Infertility general chat/support thread

[Roo45]

Not sure if this exists already, but I wondered if people fancied a thread just to vent and/or talk about things that have happened in their day that have either caused them to get upset or think a certain way due to fertility issues, regardless of where you are in the journey.

I feel like my friends who haven't got through this could never understand how infertility affects pretty much every part of my life now!

For example today I attempted to cook something complicated for some family members, it's quite rare that I cook for others even before the pandemic and I only make simple meals for myself. Anyway everything that could go wrong did and what I managed to salvage was largely uneaten.
I told my DH maybe the universe thinks I shouldn't have children because I'm so undomestic and can't cook for other people!

@LucyLocket2021 💐💐🤞🏻 for you 💕

We're looking at FET sometime around 13th December. I'm so scared that the embryo won't thaw, scared of BFN, scared of BFP. Just frightened of the whole thing. However DH and I were discussing it last night and we agreed that we can't be pretend optimistic, but at the same time if we don't try we'll never know. That's what is keeping us going now.

@CurbsideProphet I feel the same way..I am so anxious over starting my first ovulation induction cycle and am constantly overthinking all that could go wrong but keep repeating if we don't try we'll never know..

@Roo45 good luck! xx

@LucyLocket2021 fingers crossed and lots of prayers for you xx

@LucyLocket2021 good news, fingers crossed for you

@Roo45 good luck with the little embryos!

@CurbsideProphet hang on in there, it’s always worth a try!

All you can do for your embryos is your best and the rest is up to them

Thank you, good luck everyone keeping my fingers crossed for all xxx

@seekingsolace2 ovulation induction isn’t too bad. It didn’t work for me, just finished our third cycle with a bfn. We’ll have two cycles off any meds before ivf.

@Roo45 glad to hear you have some embryos!

@BlueSilver23 hope you’re feeling better now. @LucyLocket2021 fingers crossed for you.

@CurbsideProphet I think my husband is sick of me saying this but I feel like none of this will work right now. I can’t imagine having a baby at this point and I’m finding that hard. My husband just turned 40, I’ll be 40 in eighteen months. It feels like it’s slipping away.

Thanks all for your well wishes and prayers - really really appreciate it

How is everyone getting on?

I know exactly what you’re getting @CurbsideProphet. The stakes are just so high. Have you started your meds? All the extra hormones do not help.

@lucylocket2021 how are you? I'm in the 2ww and it's agonising!!xx

I need to do some whining. I’ve had 3 failed Get’s this year and it has broken me. 5 day blasts that were filled with promise. I don’t know how not to be filled with self loathing for my failure. I’m not sure whether to try out endorse biopsy and scare Dof more pin and more tests and more meds. I’m lucky to have a ds from double donation and I’m desperate to give him a sibling if I can. Just needed to tear my hair out with people who understand.

It is indeed, the worst girl gang!

@Angliski I'm so sorry :( I was recommended a hysteroscopy after 2 failed implantations. Are the blastocyst also from donor?
Just remember it's the treatment that 'failed' and not you. You haven't done anything to cause this. Xx

@LucyLocket2021 I'm on my progynova (I think that's what they call the estrogen). Scan Weds morning to check womb lining and bloods to check natural ovulation has been prevented. Then they'll call to tell me when to start the 6 days of Lubion.

I'm cross with Care Fertility really as they're quite bad at communication. One nurse said they might not call for a week after the scan. And she kept saying 5 days of Lubion when the Consultant had said 6 days. I had to ring up and leave a message to say I have no idea what's going on. Another nurse rang to say no you've misunderstood, you will be called by midday on Saturday with the plan. I appreciate everyone is busy etc, but they would reduce a lot of the stress etc if they would have things clear, preferably written down.

@Roo45 hope you're feeling ok and keeping the nerves down? I've started listening to the Mindful IVF app section for FET and it is helping a bit with my nerves.

@Roo45 haven’t been offered anything till this list of things now. What’s a hysterosxopy check?

@Angliski it can look for adhesions or endometriosis which can affect implantation endometriosis can also affect egg quality I think xx

Had a really interesting consult with Geoffrey Sher today. He’s been doing ivf since early eighties. On his website if you go to the book now link and fill in the form there’s a downloaded ebook on recurrent ivf failure that’s v interesting and free.
Will see if I can upload there as an attachment as he said it’s fine to share with others in Same situ

@Angliski that would be amazing!x

That would be so kind of you @Angliski 💐

Sorry to ask but I know lots of you are very knowledgeable. I’ve got to have an AFC scan and AMH blood test next week and I’m a bit of a wuss. Will they just do the scan and blood test and send me on my way or will they do any other checks? It’s making me all anxious and I feel a bit silly

Hi @ChocolatePotCafe, if they’ve said it’s just afc and AMH then it should be just that. If you haven’t had an internal follicle scan before don’t fret, I’m very medically anxious and I found it fine the first time, it’s easier than a smear IMO.

@ChocolatePotCafe honestly I really struggle with smears and have to have diazepam before an embryo transfer but found the scan is absolutely fine!xx

@Roo45 I'm really worried by the embryo transfer, I won't lie. How did you get the diazepam given to you?

@thislittlebird my consultant suggested it, I took it just over an hour before the transfer, I am private so it was a private prescription. X

@ChocolatePotCafe I also struggle with smears etc but the internal scan was fine, you can ask for a smaller wand too. It was definitely not as bad as a smear test.

@Roo45 they know I’ve got anxiety so I’m going to mention it when I go in to see the nurse. IVF starts w/c 24th jan 😬😬😬

@thislittlebird so glad you've got a start date finally. I have had 2 embryo transfers and both were fine. I have tilted womb and cervix so usually find speculum awful for smears. To be frank I think the Consultants in fertility clinics are just much more experienced with speculums and vaginas than your standard nurse at a GP surgery (that's not to be disparaging to nurses).