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Our Infertility Support forum is a space to connect with others in the same position, discuss causes, treatment and IVF, and share infertility stories of hope and success.

Original poster

MFI support thread

223 replies

TheBeesKnee · 23/07/2019 21:42

Firstly apologies if this already exists. I had a look and couldn't find anything.

I've name changed as I feel like I have maybe been found out under my usual username, or maybe it's the paranoia settling in!

I'm late 20s, TTC 1 year.

I have been driving myself insane: stopped drinking alcohol, started eating dairy and fish was a hardened vegan for 10 years, stopped drinking caffeine, tried Brazil nuts, fertility smoothies and pineapple cores.

Nothing worked because it turns out that DP is effectively infertile, possibly due to a historical varicocele. We thought that may have been a factor but GP waved us away with "not necessarily - and anyway, you haven't been trying that long!" So we got a private sperm analysis and the results were Not Good.

However, DP got a (relatively) speedy referral to a urologist and after a few back and forths has had surgery on the affected vein. He's recovering, but we won't see "results" for at least 3 months as obviously sperm take 70 days to produce, although the testosterone production is supposed to be fixed/affected almost immediately.

Even then, research shows that only 30-50% of men with successful surgeries went on to conceive in the 12 months following the op, so my hours are not high. I mostly just feel that I will never be pregnant or have a baby, I'm convinced that next we'll find out that something is horribly wrong with me.

DP is being great. He says that we can look at donor sperm if this doesn't work, he wouldn't deny me the opportunity to be a mother. This just makes me cry, I have been very weepy the last few months.

Anyway, I thought it would be good to speak to others also affected by MFI as I feel very lonely and isolated as no one in real life knows that we are TTC, never mind that we're having issues.

OP posts:
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mayihavesomecakeplease · 05/10/2019 22:10

@TheBeesKnee good luck!! That would be so great if you were able to get your BFP without any more treatment for either of you!!

My DH had another SA this past week, and we have a urologist appointment the week after this one. Hoping for some improvement after the clomid, or at least a referral on to further investigations like microTESE finally. My AF is due today, so feeling a bit fed up about it all.

Steenac7 · 08/10/2019 12:14

Hi all, we had our urology appointment and ultrasound which confirmed a Varicoele and DH has been recommended for surgery! @TheBeesKnee how did your DH find it? Feeling positive that this might improve quality and count! Don’t think we’ll get a natural conception but hoping it’ll assist with a successful ICSI!

Original poster
TheBeesKnee · 08/10/2019 12:31

Steenac7

Will the surgery be soon? Will you go for ICSI straight away or give it some time to go au naturale first?

DP was fine, he had bruising on the thigh which he found very itchy and there was some aches in the kidneys which faded after about a week. He's fine now but issues can arise 6 months after surgery as well.

DP has not had a follow up appointment to check his count yet but I've definitely noticed a difference in the erm texture. Plus he's getting a bit hairier! All good signs Grin

OP posts:
Steenac7 · 08/10/2019 12:59

@TheBeesKnee hoping to do surgery later this month. We’re in Ireland so have to pay for everything so that speeds things up. We were advised my DH results were so bad that natural conception is unlikely so we’ll go again with ICSI in February if we can get the Op done this month. We are fed up now too and would like to have a baby!! If we could have a baby then we would probably try naturally before going back to clinic to go for a second child (wishful thinking I know!) but that’s the plan!! I don’t want to waste any more time on natural as the doc said this morning most of it is driven by the egg and I’m 33 at the minute with a good AMH

Steenac7 · 08/10/2019 13:00

How long are you planning to wait?

ProbablyPertunia · 08/10/2019 14:36

My DH had an appointment with a uro-radiologist today and will be having his op either next Tuesday or the 29th of this month. Should hopefully hear later today which it will be! Fingers crossed for next week. Looks like we are at similar stages @Steenac7 how is your DH feeling about the op? The specialist who will be doing my DH's op says he goes in via the neck which sounds pretty scary, think most go in via the groin!
We are going to wait 6 months and then start IVF. Going to get 2 SA done at 3 and 6 months post op to see where we are with quantity and quality. We've also been told it still wont happen naturally for us.

Steenac7 · 08/10/2019 16:03

Hi @ProbablyPertunia sounds like are indeed similar! We are probably being a bit impatient to go again after 3 months Blush but we can’t face waiting any longer! I guess if the SA doesn’t improve maybe we will give it a bit longer. My DH is putting on a brave face! We’re both cautiously optimistic it’ll help improve our odds so from that perspective he is looking forward to getting it done but he is nervous about it and worried if something goes wrong his man parts may no longer Work! Shock he said I’ve had to do plenty under sedation egg collection investigations etc so it’s only right he should do what he can. How is your DH feeling?

Yes we are in via groin. Did he give a reason for going via neck?

ProbablyPertunia · 08/10/2019 20:26

@Steenac7 Apparently the surgeon just prefers it, I find it really weird but my husband isn't fazed at all! He's been amazing about everything to be fair, I am very thankful!

willithappen · 08/10/2019 21:28

Have any of you tried the route of bituminise for dp, clomid for yourself (can you be prescribed this even if ovulating naturally?) and iui?

I've been reading a bit about it tonight but noticed a lot went straight for ICSI

Steenac7 · 08/10/2019 21:32

@willithappen IUI only recommended work a good sperm count which a lot of ICSI don’t have! Usually if you’re recommended for ICSI, IUI won’t work!

Original poster
TheBeesKnee · 14/10/2019 23:07

Today is CD25 and I am spotty, weepy and eating every last piece of chocolate in the house. I don't think this is looking good.

OP posts:
willithappen · 14/10/2019 23:11

@TheBeesKnee
Also CD25 and have the dodgy gas feeling in my stomach that's a usual AF sign :(

My partner has all normal results but 1% morphology

Original poster
TheBeesKnee · 15/10/2019 00:01

Yeah, I didn't want to mention my gassiness. I sort of feel resigned and resentful.

Sorry to hear about those results. Have you discussed what your options are?

OP posts:
willithappen · 15/10/2019 08:32

We have been referred to the fertility clinic so waiting on that appointment to come through. I'm still waiting my day 21 blood results to come back also, hopefully will get those today!

One day both of us will get our wish! We just have to keep trying!

ProbablyPertunia · 15/10/2019 09:23

@TheBeesKnee @willithappen I'm sorry you two are both feeling down! I get that inevitable feeling though, it really is awful!
My DH has just had his embolisation this morning, took less than an hour and he is enjoying the free biscuits he was given once it was finish! Let's hope it makes some massive difference as that's what it's going to take for us to get pregnant!

willithappen · 15/10/2019 09:32

@ProbablyPertunia

Fingers Croat for you both that it does! Who knew all this making a baby procedures could be so difficult huh!

Steenac7 · 15/10/2019 14:36

@ProbablyPertunia that’s great to get the op done and that he’s not too sore! Fingers crossed it makes a difference!

We have had no update on when the op will be! Followed up today with the clinic and it turns out that the clinic who did the ultrasound haven’t even sent over the cd yet so we can get the surgical team to review! Have told my DH to call and give out! Fed up waiting in general never mind waiting due to incompetence! Hoping we will get a date soon!

Are you going to try naturally for a while or go to ICSI?

Steenac7 · 15/10/2019 14:37

@TheBeesKnee @willithappen sorry to hear you’re both having a tough day. I no longer have the two week Wait issues as although we are still trying every month after 18 months we’ve stopped thinking it’s going to happen naturally. So it does help to just focus on how hopefully assisted reproduction is going to be how we get our baby and doing all we can in that regard.

willithappen · 15/10/2019 15:28

Well I was due to get my results back today from day 21 tests. Doctor said to call today as when I had appointment on Monday morning they were not back (I got them done Thursday 10th)

Call this afternoon and they are still not in. Really worried that they never actually carried them out as my doctor has results from other tests they carried out on my blood such as thyroid and cells etc but nothing back on progesterone. I have to call back on Thursday and see.

Anyone else had a long wait, or am I over thinking this and a week isn't that long to wait for them to be back? I just don't want to have to go get them done again :(

Embri · 15/10/2019 18:29

@TheBeesKnee @willithappen fingers crossed for a good outcome of TWW!

@Steenac7 I’m the same, since finding out DH’s awful SA I have completely relaxed about cycle tracking, I no longer do ovulation sticks or temping as I don’t see the point! There is always the little hope in me in each TWW (currently day 22!!) but it’s not the same crushing devastating when it doesn’t work.

My update is that we are waiting for our first appointment at Leeds. I rang them yesterday and they said the first appointment is usually 6-8 weeks from when they get the referral, they got that over 2 weeks ago so I’m hoping that all being well we will have our first IVF consultation before the end of November!!! 🤞🤞🤞

Hopefully84 · 15/10/2019 19:43

Hi all. Hoping I can join in on your thread.
My husband and I are just about to start the ICSI process. We have been trying over 5 years now, both mid 30s. We were misdiagnosed through NHS. I have PCOS and it was thought that I had a blocked tube and wasn't ovulating. Since deciding to go private we have found that this isn't the case, am ovulating and both tubes open....husband however has a low count of 8mil.
So ICSI it is.
We have got two years unlimited with access fertility and due to start out first round next month. Short protocol.
Beyond nervous and excited....treating the first round as a "trial run" so as not to get our hopes up. 😬
Anyone else used acsess fertility to pay for treatment? We are with herts and essex fertility clinic.
Wishing you all luck on your journeys!

willithappen · 16/10/2019 23:29

@Hopefully84 can I ask why they thought you had blocked tubes without testing you for it first?

I only ask as I have now over thought myself into believing I probably have blocked tubes! I had chlamydia around 7 years ago, not sure how long I had it for as the boyfriend I had at the time had been cheating on me the entire time but I have read online and have now convinced myself I have blocked tubes and it's all because of an STD

Hopefully84 · 17/10/2019 07:54

I did have a test on the NHS but it was inconclusive, Doc couldn't say if there was any dye coming through on one side and consultant refused to send me again.
Having had a one stop fertility test at my new clinic it's been confirmed that both are open one just took a little longer for the dye to come through but was fine after that.

That's crap, I'm sorry that happened to you..... I was actually in a similar situation with an ex years ago and so assumed that was the reason for the "tube damage"
Are you able to ask for a HSG from your doctor to put your mind at rest? Or perhaps even a private clinic?
Are you under any consultants at the minute?
I know it's a possibility but i dont think its super common when you think about everyone who has had chlamydia....google is not your friend. 🤣

willithappen · 17/10/2019 15:27

@Hopefully84

Thanks for tour response, that has put my mind at ease a bit.

I am waiting our referral to come through for our nearest fertility clinic. I assume they will test me then as part of the usual checks they do or will I need to request it?
I got my Day 21 blood results back today, finally. Nurse said everything looked all fine. I asked what the levels were (because I wanted to be sure and not just take 'yeah its okay' as an answer). I was told level was 29.70. I did read that anything above 30 shows ovulation so I'm not too sure. I also think I may have had my bloods done on day 22 (my cycles vary from 27-28 days) and I feel AF here today so think I'm on a 27 day cycle last month.

Hopefully the referral comes through soon. My partner has started taking the wellman tablets so fingers crossed they make some sort of difference

Hopefully84 · 18/10/2019 11:20

@willithappen that all sounds super positive.
I've heard that Zinc is supposed to be really good for men. My husbands been taking that alongside the wellman.
I would imagine that they will do all the tests for you but definitely ask if not.
Once you've had all your investigations ask for copies or a sit down with consultant to explain everything thoroughly. This is where I went wrong as I was so overwhelmed and attending different clinics for different tests with no explanation of the outcomes at the time.
It was only once I went private and the consultant explained everything that we decided to move onto to ICSI due to Male factor.