TTC with a donor

[Waiting2BAMummy]

So it appears I posted the 1,000 message on our previous thread and now it's closed so I've opened us a new home!

@TimeIhadaNameChange
@LanieM87
@Freezerbump

Hi all
I hope you don’t mind me jumping on this thread. I am hoping to have another child and need a sperm donor. Where did you all find your donors? Do any of you use sperm from a sperm bank? How does it work?

Any tips would be greatly recieved because it all seems so confusing!

Hi everyone,

Sorry I've been MIA. It's been a rubbish weekend! As well as AF arriving my best friends 5 week old baby has also been in hospital and very poorly 😥 looking forward to a fresh start in the new year. We are trying again in January.

Hope everyone else is doing ok. @Waiting2BAMummy have you tested yet? Xxxx

Hi @CleverQuacks I found my donor on the co-parents website. I did look into a sperm bank but decided to go down the ‘fresh’ route instead.

@VNAWENN sorry to hear about your friends baby I hope they’re getting better. I won’t be testing until Thursday at the earliest but more likely Saturday as I fully expect AF to arrive before then.

@Waiting2BAMummy well I'll be keeping my 🤞🏼 crossed for you that AF doesn't show xx

Sorry to hear about your friends baby - hope she's soon on the road to recovery @VNAWENN

@Waiting2BAMummy I have looked at the coparents website. Did you find it quite easy to find someone? Will the donor be having anything to do with the child?

Thanks for asking, @Pinkfamily. I'm doing ok. Still very sleepy at times (slept most of Saturday!) but I have times when I'm actually awake now, which is good! The wee alien (as (s)he is called!) seems to have become a lot more lively the last few days, moving around whenever possible. I was convinved DP was going to wake up last night having received a kick to his bum, but he managed to sleep through it!

@Waiting2BAMummy - I got your message. I'll send it to you just now.

@CleverQuacks welcome to the thread. I am going through a sperm clinic SellmerDiers. They send the frozen sperm to you at home or via a clinic.
@Waiting2BAMummy I know that it's hard to be positive, this is only my second try and I'm already feeling a bit deflated, I'm not feeling any different. But your not out honey so you never know! I'm going to try and stop reading so many articles, I don't think the contradicting information helps!!
@VNAWENN oh my goodness your poor friend's baby, I hope the baby gets better soon. We have amazing doctor's in this country.
@TimeIHadaNameChange take as much sleep as you need hon- your body is working so hard at the moment. Have you had your iron levels checked just in case, sometimes they can get low when pregnant. It's funny that your dp didn't feel the kick!!!
@LanieM87 how are you?

@Pinkfamily I have looked at the clinic but it says you need a health professional. Who have you used for that?

@CleverQuacks one of my friends is a dentist. But you can literally use any health professional like a physiotherapist.

Thank you for welcomes to the group. I have spent today going into over all the options and I think I am going to try coparents initially. @Waiting2BAMummy any tips on finding a donor on there would be great.

@TimeIhadaNameChange are you pregnant? If so, congratulations! Did you conceive through donor sperm? Do you mind me asking what route you chose?

@CleverQuacks I just looked at the profiles of people reasonably close to me and messaged those who seemed to fit the bill. I stated categorically that I was only looking for AI and that was none negotiable.

A few guys I chatted to were time wasters, wanted NI etc but my current donor is amazing and I am very lucky. You need to register and subscribe (I think it’s about £25 per month) in order to be able to send and read messages.

Make sure your clear about what it is you’re looking for, I didn’t intend for my donor to ever have anything to do with the child but he is such a lovely human that I’m relenting a little. I don’t want him to be part of their every day life but I will be happy for them to contact him at 18 if they so choose.

Hope this helps.

Thanks for the tips @Waiting2BAMummy.
I have started talking to a couple of people so hopefully something will come of it. I have missed ovulation for this month so won’t be able to start trying til December which is annoying.

@LanieM87 @Pinkfamily @Waiting2BAMummy thank you all. Little bubba is back home where he belongs now, thank goodness!

Not long til test day for you @Waiting2BAMummy 🤞🏼🤞🏼🤞🏼🤞🏼

@CleverQuacks - yes, I'm 24 weeks pregnant, conceived by donor sperm as my DP had a vasectomy a long time ago which failed at reversal.

I went through Cryos, luckily managing to fall pregnant before they stopped sending to private addresses. It took four goes (and a helluva lot of cash!) but we did it.

I did think about using a live donor (as it were) but I live on a Scottish island. I did spot one donor a year or so back who lived down the road, but thought that though convenient that would be too close for comfort, and the next nearerst were over a hundred miles away, with little to choose from. If I'd been living in a city, or at least somewhere with better transport links, I might have been more tempted.

@TimeIhadaNameChange congratulations! That gives me hope that this is possible. I hope the rest of your pregnancy goes smoothly.

I have started talking to a guy on coparents who seems good.

Do you guys track ovulation? How do you do it? I have never done it before. Just had regular sex to conceive my children but obviously with a donor you need to be more precise.

I recommend the clearblue ovulation tests @CleverQuacks there’s no is that line positive or not questions, you either get a smiley face or you don’t. There are two versions one just has a static smiley face when you get your LH surge and is blank the rest of the time. The other is dual hormone so you get a flashing smiley face as estrogen rises before your LH surge and then it’s static when you get your surge.

Some people track their basal body temperature too but this doesn’t show that you’ve ovulated until after the fact. I don’t do this as my sleep pattern is all over the place and often get up in the night which would throw my temps off anyway.

@Waiting2BAMummy how are you doing?

I’m okay @Pinkfamily no sign of the witch yet although I definitely feel like she is circling overhead on her broomstick! I only based my prediction of her arriving today off of last month but my LP was unusually short so could be anytime between now and Saturday.

How are you doing?

@Waiting2BAMummy circling on her broomstick 😂 well let's hope that's she not 🤞🏽🤞🏽🤞🏽 yeah I'm good just find this waiting quite hard. I deal with literally anything life can throw at me, (and believe me it has) if I'm know what I'm dealing with. I think I'm just having a bit of a down day tbh I'm sure I'll shake it off tomorrow ☺️

Bless you @Pinkfamily we’ve all been there. You will get there even if this isn’t the month. I know that’s not what you want to hear because we all want it to be yesterday but you have to keep the faith x

Fingers crossed for both of you. I am just wishing this month away because I know I have missed ovulation. I am quite lucky that I get a lot of physical signs that I am ovulating but I have ordered the ovulation sticks you recommended for next month.

Thanks @CleverQuacks, does anyone stand out as a possible donor yet? Find a good one and you’re half way there.

Sorry I just needed to vent, feeling much better now 🙈 thanks @Waiting2BAMummy
@CleverQuacks yes have you found a donor yet?

I have been talking to a nice guy who has been a successful donor for a few lady’s so i am hoping to use him. He is happy with AI to which is good. Just a bit anxious that it’s to good to be true. He could turn out to be an axe murderer lol! What steps did you use with your donors to keep safe?