Stay at Home........

[Acesulfame]

I’ve stayed at home throughout for the most part but I’m concerned that I didn’t stay “the fuck” at home. I understand it’s important from posts I’ve read on here. Does that mean I’m going to get Covid? Can anyone tell me how I can make my staying at home more “the fuck”?

Like the expression, I might forget to leave it behind when I’m just pootling to the farm shop on my weekly heady thrill of Shopping The Fuck Out Of Home.

Thank you to the person who has reminded me that Boots is open. It wasn't very pleasant in lockdown 1 as there was a woman outside with a clipboard interrogating everyone about why you needed to go in.
I'm guessing this madness cautiousness has stopped by now and it could be a nice way to kill a few grannies minutes... and I'm getting a bit bored with The Range and Home Bargains.
I will be doing essential shopping' in there only of course...( Do they sell Easter eggs? - asking for a friend)

@Buzzinwithbez

Thank you to the person who has reminded me that Boots is open. It wasn't very pleasant in lockdown 1 as there was a woman outside with a clipboard interrogating everyone about why you needed to go in. I'm guessing this madness cautiousness has stopped by now and it could be a nice way to kill a few grannies minutes... and I'm getting a bit bored with The Range and Home Bargains. I will be doing essential shopping' in there only of course...( Do they sell Easter eggs? - asking for a friend)

Yes boots stopped the non essential purchasing by lockdown 2, I’m certain it was down to magic masks and certainly not due to them flogging Christmas 3 for 2 gift sets....

How would one flock? I mean, you can drive or cycle, but I’d really like to flock

@Malteser71

How would one flock? I mean, you can drive or cycle, but I’d really like to flock

You must do it by heading somewhere that's likely to have a handful of people there on a warm weekend and ensure you're standing in a (socially distanced) queue while slurping ( make sure you're slurping, not just drinking) a coffee and being photographed with a telephoto lense.

But do I need to do something with my arms? Like a bird would?

Irony, sarcasm and any general amusement is to declare yourself an enemy of STFAH. It’s a blatant lack of focus on the serious business of STFAH and we all know where that behaviour leads.

@MrBullinaChinaShop

Instead of ‘Baby on Board’ you could have ‘Key Worker on Board’.
Now there’s a business idea...

Fear not, Facebook marketplace has you covered...

[quote TheSockMonster]@MrBullinaChinaShop

Instead of ‘Baby on Board’ you could have ‘Key Worker on Board’.
Now there’s a business idea...

Fear not, Facebook marketplace has you covered...[/quote]
£250!!!

£250!!!
You can't put a price on life saving!

It's absolutely essential that you comment on any social media post promoting holidays/days out/anything fun with "this is a global pandemic! Are you serious? Stay home etc etc" when it's blatantly obvious they don't mean now but in the future!

Hurrah for this thread. It’s really cheered me up

@Holidayaddict

It's absolutely essential that you comment on any social media post promoting holidays/days out/anything fun with "this is a global pandemic! Are you serious? Stay home etc etc" when it's blatantly obvious they don't mean now but in the future!

And if anyone talks about a time in the past when they met with a friend without it being made clear that it was pre Covid, you must comment something along the lines of ‘where are you that this is legal?’, or ‘are there no social distancing rules where you are?’, or even just ‘hmm, Covid?’

I stayed at home and ate soil and leaves when the dried pasta ran out. I didn’t subscribe to Netflix though. Does this mean that I loose my fuck status?

MrBullinaChinashop there's a car in my village with a sticker in the window that says something along the lines of "the person in this car is an employee of xxxx and is involved in essential food production, ensuring continuing supply of Cheddar cheese to the starving children of the UK, during the GLOBAL PANDEMIC..."
Makes me smile every time I walk past, my COVID vapour trail wafting behind me as I head off to forbidden kingdoms, such as Wales or Essex to perform my key worker duties (that don't involve schools, care homesvor hospitals, so don't really count). I haven't stayed at home, let alone "the fuck" at home.
I'm doomed to eternal damnation, but I don't really care, because I'm going to London next week, on a TRAIN!!
BWAHAHAHA...

I stayed the fuck at home which was very much my life before all this anyway. More importantly, I ranted frequently about the government not closing our boarders, so I think that’s worth quite a few more points.

Fuzzy I think it means you soiled yourself

Also, we can’t always be in the middle of a global pandemic.

At some point, we must be more than halfway through?

Social media is awash with photos of me running my business empire from home in our hot tub while simultaneously baking sourdough bread, cutting the triplets' hair, homeschooling them and swimming a mile in small circles to fundraise for the NHS. I am a multi-tasking STFAHer.

@MrsMackesy

I identify as stay at home fluid.

😂😂

This is the best thread I've ever read on this pandemic. Thank you!

@Malteser71

Also, we can’t always be in the middle of a global pandemic.

At some point, we must be more than halfway through?

Well as this is going on until AT LEAST 2024 (declaration made on the basis of no information whatsoever) then we haven’t even made halfway yet. Sorry. ^ just earned myself some ‘the fuck’ points!

@Weedsnseeds1

MrBullinaChinashop there's a car in my village with a sticker in the window that says something along the lines of "the person in this car is an employee of xxxx and is involved in essential food production, ensuring continuing supply of Cheddar cheese to the starving children of the UK, during the GLOBAL PANDEMIC..." Makes me smile every time I walk past, my COVID vapour trail wafting behind me as I head off to forbidden kingdoms, such as Wales or Essex to perform my key worker duties (that don't involve schools, care homesvor hospitals, so don't really count). I haven't stayed at home, let alone "the fuck" at home. I'm doomed to eternal damnation, but I don't really care, because I'm going to London next week, on a TRAIN!! BWAHAHAHA...

Brilliant

I’m sorry to burst your bubble, bull in a China shop, but I think you should be realistic. Your views are frankly terrifying, which has left me both terrified and literally shaking and sobbing.

In fact, I spat my tea out all over my keyboard!

By 2024, we might have the schools back open, but it’s a risk that only those selfish enough not to check their privilege would want to take. And I’m not in that category, thank you VERY much.

So I’m afraid I’m afraid. And very sorry.

But more importantly, I’m HTH.

havent read the whole thread but its really made me laugh (is that still allowed...if I'm laughing inside my home?)

Has anyone mentioned the probability that 97% of covid cases can be directly contributed to people in B and M bargains because it has been scientifically proven that it circulates much more viciously there than in Waitrose?