Jackass whisperers against the cheap beer virus

[PrincessConsueIaBananaHammock]

Thread number...4?!? Fucking hell I've never been so popular.

Keep on keeping on and ,moan,whinge and laugh while you enjoy your deliveries and cackle evilly while you kill thousands.

All under the benevolent eye of your awesome , yellow and very ripe leader.

May the bleach be with you.

Max i am very honoured you forced yourself to have a drink in my honour😀 i am on my 3rd glass of wine this wont end well....

Banana cat is wishing you a very happy birthday too Willow. Here he is in all his majestic fluffines(fat).

Can I join you murdering crisp eating people please?
My credentials....I received my order of 12 bottles of wine from Wowcher today, from Spain no less so I expect I’m responsible for a fair few deaths.

I’m awaiting my order of essential items from Poundland, including various hair serums for teenage DD’s......anything to bribe them to maybe look at their school work.

I drive to take my dog for a walk and occasionally talk to my neighbours over the fence.......shall I lawyer up? 😁😁

As my ds2 would say "FLUFFY!!!!"😄😄😄

My birthday unfortunately hasnt killed anyone although my kids are pushing thier luck🤔🤔 Been the worst birthday ever except for a the good wishes i got on MN and my box of Dark Chocs from kids GF. Bless him he is awesome.
But lots of wine too much and the lovely James Hepburn and the rest of Metallica are making it better 😁

willow it was tough, but I'm forcing it down. Got to do what we can in times like this. Couldn't have you drinking alone on your birthday. (if your on your 3rd wine you may as well finish the bottle.......cheers.)

ahhhaahhh the fluffiness!!!!! ❤

My messenger seems to be full of bored men. It's all good fun until lockdown ends

Thats my kind of thinking Max 😁 for whome the bell tolls and all that...just have to go with it.😉
Arghh fecking cooker i hate it its gone from barely coloured toast to burnt black toast twice in 20 seconds flat.

Can I join you murdering crisp eating people please?

😂 Just catching up. We all sound mental. Welcome to the dark side Kerry

Happy Birthday @Willow2017 !!

DD2 wants 'lockdown hair' because her friends are all dyeing theirs blue and purple etc. Her hair is bum length light brown. I'm dubious!! I'm not against it, but what if I wreck it

So this evening I set to making dinner and 2/3 of the way in discovered we were out of the main ingredient. It's pretty essential to the meal, which makes it pretty essential, so I jumped in the car to buy it, rather than give up and make gruel instead.

@CrowCat how old is she? If i were you I'd give it a go to the hair underneath at the back or just the tips. Then if it all goes wrong, they'll be hidden, it can be sorted with a trim.

Or buy her a set of hair chalks and let her play/experiment.

If she's old enough/you're up for it you could give her a few highlights and colour those.

I do a lot of crap to my hair so DD has the bug and we tried quite a few things.

@PrincessConsueIaBananaHammock she's 9. We tried a pink wash out dye last summer but it didn't take too well. Everyone seems to be bleaching their kids' hair then adding colour in streaks. I was thinking maybe bleach the ends perhaps a few inches up and then add some colour, but certainly not all over!

DD1 and I have always dyed our hair, she's had hers all kinds of colours by my hand from being around 10, but it's never been as long as DD2s.

Lockdown Tesco metro!

Quick shop after picking up essential meds for DD. Decided on a quick trip to the little Tesco opposite for essential supplies. No one queuing to get in, good start! So waiting behind 2M distance tape waiting for next slot to be free only next 2 slots have Tesco staff filling shelves, that's ok I thought I can go to the right! Oh shit they have introduced a one way system, only way is forward! Lady coming in from behind, this isn't good, next 2 slots still have Tesco staff...what to do?

I become Tom Cruise (play mission impossible music) half scaling the shelves opposite the Tesco stacker to stay at least 199cm away from said Tesco lady who at that moment decides to give one dry cough! 62% alcohol hand sanitiser in bag but no face mask on...arghhhh!

Made it round, got essential supplies mostly, then spot the effing wine sat other side of one way system! I can't deal with the stress of going round again so settled for gin tonight. It's bloody exhausting this lockdown!!

Definitely not all over. DD is younger and we've been doing it for a while with just the ends that need trimming anyways. Last summer hols I died two streaks at the back/underneath and dyed them pink. Not noticeable at all in a braid or even a pony.

Except on her first day back she ran to the HT ,pulling at her pony "Look Mrs X , mummy let me have pink hair! She had purple hair this summer!" .🙈

Her hair with very expensive,fancy hair chalk from Hamleys (which we didn't buy, we went for cheapies from ebay).

@Princess I might just do the ends then, perhaps a spot of bleach first!

@LalalalalaLlama ah yes, one of her friends used crepe paper to turn her hair blue! I haven't used crepe paper since ill fated attempts at Blue Peter Christmas creations

I suppose we could try both? She's itching to do something 'on trend'

Just place marking so I can find this thread again, after I few shit days of committing no crime as haven’t left the house. This did make me chuckle though

Morning all! It's early but I thought I should get started on my daily murderous rampage. I have bought myself a digital jam thermometer and a book about a year on a smallholding in France from Amazon.

Princess what is the big issue about school and hair colour? Does it creep up the head and into the brain like the virus creeps up your bum from park benches?

Looks really lovely by the way.

Going to join you naughty little pixies when I've read the previous threads (for fear of missing out on an in-joke). Thought you lot might appreciate this article

news.sky.com/story/baby-born-in-car-park-after-paramedic-mistook-dads-call-for-help-as-cheering-11977284