Jackass whisperers against the cheap beer virus

[PrincessConsueIaBananaHammock]

Thread number...4?!? Fucking hell I've never been so popular.

Keep on keeping on and ,moan,whinge and laugh while you enjoy your deliveries and cackle evilly while you kill thousands.

All under the benevolent eye of your awesome , yellow and very ripe leader.

May the bleach be with you.

Morning all

Blobby please don’t feel unworthy

I’m convinced most people rushed to volunteer to give them an excuse to be out....yes, I really did say that

Smile ooh I wonder what you’re up to....

I should really look at the earn £10 a day thread but my ancient computer won’t cope with a lot of the suggestions on there.

With no training as a carer, I wonder if anyone would hire me right now?!

There will be plenty of things you can do otherwise Lilac. Also, I can’t imagine you being turned down because of a lack of experience - you’re trainable.

Trebolla

I don’t know

Applying for a job at the moment will mean health questions are likely? Being asthmatic doesn’t put me in a good spot, I imagine.

Morning sausage lovers.

I have aged 10 years doung tjat damm bathroom. Aching all over this morning.😄 But i have unearthed 2 cormer shelves and painted them to put up in said bathroom, hung washing out and have a pile of washing to.put away. Where is my soldier medal? Unfortunately nobody wS killed in the process so epic fail.so far today. Although i can hear neighbours OUTSIDE talking so might report them to make up for it.
Am staying off other threads so far its all too Orwellian out there😞
Just gonna sit hete with my coffee and roll up in the sun by the fire .
Shits tell them.you are just cutting out the middle man! Saves time and hospital resources. (Some bloody Idiots on here just now would believe you)

Blobby hunker down here and let the world go.by. We all get down days its ok to acknowledge them and just do the best we can to get through them. Hope you feel better pdq.

from now on anyone who accuses me of murder and selfishness will get a full confession that YES I am. I will hide from my crimes no more

Me too. Unbelievable that onrs of these people have just said 'some people will miss out. Whilst talking about potentially life saving treatment, for non covid patients.

As though it's a fucking tombola.

How anyone can cry 'so you think covid patients should be dumped in the morgue?' Whilst also saying that non covid deaths are just 'people missing out and acceptable losses, is beyond me.

@PrincessConsueIaBananaHammock thanks for jumping in. I was about to lose my shit.

Shit where’s this please?

I meant to post this here and put it on the mask thread by mistake!

🎤 bring on the dancing nurses
Feckless and not alone
Shiver and say
The words
EVERY LIE YOU’VE HEARD

(Now the Boris Johnson mantra)

First I’m gonna make it
Then I’m gonna break it till it falls apart🎤

Because this is how you behave after a landslide election victory.

@lilactree1 its the 'I can't see a way out of this thread'

Shit

Oh, I saw myself out of that thread 😂 I’ll look again.

Shits no worries.. think I lost mine. Rather incoherent and rambly really but I'm doing a maths course that's doing my head in, DD doing her English while sulking cause she lost her tech for the daftest lie ever and feeling shit cause I'm getting fatter and fatter and haven't actually done any of the things that need doing in the flat. Meh...

Ah princess, its proper crap at the moment isn't it.

Can I brighten your day a small amount? By adding a photo.

@LilacTree1 you really need to come back!

@LilacTree1 is there anything else you can do bar caring?

Blessed Day Doggers.

It's sunny, the axe is sharpened, so DC will be scaring the bejeezus out of the neighbours again with their wild chopping technique. I have stopped leaving an A&E 'go-bag' at the front door as I have ceased to care I have full faith in their ability to not remove fingers, toes, or vital organs.
Angles in blue are safe. You're welcome.
Much busier around my neck of the woods, so no doubt we will all get a ticking off when they put up that slide on traffic at the Daily Briefing later. I thought my team meetings were dull, but their repetitive PowerPoint presentations are a thing to behold.

Glad to see I wasn't the only one who thought of MNet when I saw the Trump/detergent headline this morning

Hello you lot, seems I missed out on a conversation about dogging during my (failed) attempt at an early night. There's plenty of them where I live. I've never been but I know where they are.

Probably shouldn't mention that to some of my bored, rampant admirers, one of whom has moved from 'remember that bbq we both attended 10 years ago' to 'we've known each other 10 years so show me your lady parts'

People are strange. Funny though.

It's super sunny. I'm considering drinking beer in the garden for the rest of the day while I have no work on.

I've killed no one today. And I've tried to stay off the shouty frother threads for my own sanity. I will be standing barefoot on some local grass later so they may as well book the firing squad.

Having a glance through some threads though I'm seeing a resurgence in common sense which is good to read!! Particularly on the are kids still going to grandparents thread. I can't link it but a few posters are hitting the nail on the head so I'm happy to join in.

Oh bloody hell. Just had an email to say my gin (delicious pink grapefruit and rhubarb) which was due to be delivered today has been damaged in transit! 😭 So now I may have to face an actual shop on the way home. Do you think the frothers sabotaged my delivery?

Cowcat euuughhh with friends like that who needs enemies?😀

Well my kill.count will be 1 today if ds1 doesnt get the feck up and do the job i gave him... there is a handy skip outside for his body. 😄
I have dusted living room to within an inch of its life so am having a coffee before hoovering. Will get back to more painting shelves and a wicker basket later.

Off to order syringes to cleanse my body of all worldly taints. I will be reborn.anew. Praise the sausage! 😑

we've known each other 10 years so show me your lady parts'

Do the knee thing then take the piss for being a weirdo getting turned on by boobs. Then block,unless you need him for some reason(entertainment included).

Willow any chance you can come over here and do some housework? You definitely seem more motivated than I am. For the good of the state and all that. We can't have the royal (1 bed) palace looking like a hovel can we?

@PrincessConsueIa lockdown seems to be having a strange effect on some of my previously very platonic male friends!

Definitely some common sense returning to the boards of MN though. Thank fuck for that

@max many sad faces for your gin

That gin sounded lovely... make them deliver another ASAP.