30s TTC: Club BESHicana, drinks are free and we're hungry like the WOOFL! The MSDP continues...

[Scorpette]

Come on in, collect the Grolsch bottle tops for your DM shoes at the door

We're going all-out 80s for the continuation of the Mass Summer Diffment Project: John Hughes films playing back-to-back and on BESH FM, DJ ChoCho will be playing our all-time 80s faves, from New Romantics to Synth to Goth to Hair Metal to Pop and back again (no Fields of The Nephilim, mind). Our bartenders and waiters are Ducky from Pretty in Pink, Ralph Macchio (the Karate Kid) and Corey Haim (back from the dead especially for us) and unlike most of the real 80s, we actually get to booze!

Here's hoping the authentic 80s vibe will trick our bodies into thinking we've got the ovaries of teenagers!

(Not to mention tricking them into being super skinny and able to eat whatever we want and staying that way!)

There's plenty of Babycham and Ice Magic to pour over ice-cream in the Pit and Metal Mickey will bring them to the wretched at the click of a finger.

So whaddya waiting for? Slip on the ra-ra skirts, slap on the blue eyeliner and let's get winning those baybeez! Last one in the pool's a psycho hose beast!

muser that is fabulous news! Really lovely to hear.

In other news I have now also polished off a chocolatey number with a flake on top. I have no willpower.

Love,
Mrs Blobby

PS Its hard to remain miserable when cakes taste so good...........

Muse that is brilliant news!! Congratumulations xxxx PLEASE don't feel anxious about posting here, you are one of us, and we will always, always be happy for you - even when things are not going well for others. We need the smooth to balance out the rough. Smooches xxx

RieRie hope operation is going well. Must be so so scary for you and sis and BiL.

My big issue with how I look is not my weight, but my acne. I've decided that must be a feminist issue too, because women are supposed to look pretty and perfect and flawless, whereas it doesn't matter for blokes. I have struggled with it since I was 12, so 22 years.

It really really gets me down, and there is absolutely nothing I can do about it. It is caused by my dodgy hormones (PCOS), and the only way to amend those is by taking particular contraceptives, specifically Dianette - obviously not compatible with current life goals.

Inevitably it has taken a permanent toll on my face and I have an array of scars, marks, dents, open pores, blackheads, etc. So of course I feel ugly, and unsexy, and can't leave the house without make up. And at my age it's frankly kind of embarrassing, having a condition that is associated with adolescence.

HO has always been fantastic about it, to the point that I almost believe he doesn't notice.

Anyway. I know that is all shallow bollox, but just wanted to add my insecurities to the pot for you to pick through

Totally totally totally sympathise Lyra. I suffer from everything you describe. I feel like my face and the surface of the moon have a lot in common. Was even investigated for PCOS (because I have excess facial and body hair too - I am a CATCH) but I don't. Just testosterone at the top end of normal. Don't know why or if anything can be done for it.

SaltnShake ?I?m so sorry. I was going to warn you about the hormone crash, just in case you felt like you were going a bit crazy. It?s perfectly normal to cry/rage/scream/feel numb in the next few weeks, but you will get through and will start to feel better soon I promise. I had a letter from the Fertility Clinic waiting for me when I got home from my D & C, congratulating me on my pregnancy! With perfect timing these little emotional bombs appear. I hope you are not needing to apply the Vulcan death grip on too many children and are being kind to both yourself and MrSalt. He sounds like a keeper.

Pepperami ? I know I?m late on chiming in but you are my new hero. I think we should get a batch of BESH t shirts printed with Scorps ?Over 30 TTC warning? (see full quote earlier in thread) and your ?don?t ask questions? rants on them. We could extend the clothing line to include ?Not pregnant, just fat/bloated? ?my dr?s appointments are for Infertility not pregnancy so stop fucking speculating turd breath!?

Methinks you are all protesting too much about the big man/big feet/big whanger lines. Just saying.

Bangers ? Jesus you didn?t half turn me on with your pinny and rolling pin telling off. Please can I have some more?

On the timely discussion of smears ? I am having three on Wednesday. Do I win a prize? (P.S.If the prize is a giant metal clamp for my fanny I don?t want it.) LeadInYourPencil shame yours isn?t then too, it could have been synchronised smearage. Or is that too weird.

AuntieAries ? congratulations on the arrival of your sisters baby, I hope it all went well today. I?m sure he?s in really good hands. Have a slightly melted Twirl, and a small pinch on the arm.

NeedNumberTwo?s ? sperm are produced months before they are actually ejaculated so it will take a while for any improvements to kick in. Good luck for Thursday too Mountie. Is your bloke going with you? I found taking a pen and paper useful so you can write down timescales, next steps, when you need to do stuff, who phones who, where do you go etc. I always get slightly confused going to the consultant (actually you usually see a nurse or a junior). I need to be told ON CD1 : I will ring the clinic. On CD3 I need to take this tablet, then this one for the next four days. Or, I need to ring the Dr to get these bloodtests done and I will pick up the results, and so on. I also found my first appointment quite surreal ? like I was faking it and didn?t really need to be there? Oh and is your bloke hydrated enough? That can make a difference to volume and the viscosity of the ejaculate.

Muse ? That?s seriously fantastic news.

Excellent news Muser, so pleased everything seems to be working out for you this time.

Sadly, same cannot be said for me. Had a private scan this afternoon and this time no heartbeat found. Went back to NHS hospital and had a repeat scan to confirm it, looks like the baby died within the last 24 hours as it had more than doubled in size since my last scan 6 days ago. I'm having an ERPC under local anesthetic tomorrow so that I don't have to worry about it happening on holiday. At the moment I am swaying between fury at the total crapness of my body and utter devastation that this has happened again.

I will be in the pit for a while. I really hope the MSDP continues for the rest of you...

MounttheHairy I didn't find the HSG painful, but it was def uncomfortable and felt a bit "wrong" IYKWIM? They did have trouble placing the dye in (the bloke had about 5 attempts...Grrrrr) so I did bleed a bit afterwards too. I took a couple of Ibuprofen + Codeine beforehand, and there was a sweetie old nurse by my head the whole time talking to me trying to take my mind off it. I got myself in a bit of a state worrying about it before but it was honestly ok. Pretty cool seeing your actual fallopian tubes and uterus on screen too . They are all squirly and long...

Oh Twinkle, I'm so sorry. That's so unfair. I know there's nothing I can say to make it better because it's just shit, so I won't try.

Twinkle, I am so very very sorry. I really don't know what to say, other than that I hope you know you can come here and rage or cry or do whatever it is that best suits you. Hug from me too, pal.

Crossposts - I'm so sorry Twinks. I hope you can find some peace on holiday and let yourself grieve properly. Will plant a new flower in my garden this week to honour the BESH babies who didn't make it. Be kind to yourself and MrTwinks in the next few weeks, it really is an absolute shitter.

Twinks I'm so, so sorry. You poor love. It's shit and unfair.

Twinks that's awful, so sorry. Take care of yourself and MrT.

Hello there,

It's aaaages since I have been around, but I have done some lurking, so I really hope I am up to date...been dealing with some worries for a week or so, happily now resolved.

I just wanted to pass on my commiserations to Saltcellar and SmotherthanthecreaminaTwinkie, I am so sorry for you both, it's just devastating

Ariadne candles are aflame around my enz...I am sure your sister and her baby will be fine...it's such an anxious-making time, but as many have said, they are in the best hands, and the NHS are the shizzle when it comes to situations like this.

Welcome to noobies, including BESH-tastic Stinkers, and chinese burns and fanny-kicks to the rest of you slaaaaghs.

twinks & salts I'm so so sorry - If it helped if I could give you a secret garden to hide in away from the world (apart from the BESHes) I would

Twinks am so really sorry. When are you going on holiday?

Oh Twinks, I'm so sorry. I hope the holiday gives you space to do whatever you need to to get through the next few weeks. Look after yourself (or even better make sure MrTwinks looks after you).

I've just come back from my fab gynae consultant to review post-hysteroscopy results:
Unlike some here , my womb is not flawless, absolutely flawless, but it is 'essentially normal'. I'm now on an extra tablet to try and stop the bleeding and have to keep taking iron tablets and eat dried fruit and red meat and review the situation in 3 months.

Time does seem to be swallowed up pretty quickly by tests, results, guessing-what-to-do-next, results of the guessing etc, but let's face it, it's the first time anyone in my family has ever been described as essentially normal so I'm tempted to have it as my facebook status.

HB re. The Magnificent Arsenal - I do believe you are quoting Alan Hansen

StinkyW - I find that the range of angry slogan tshirts are best accessorised with a scowl, face like a slapped arse and a large alcoholic drink.

I've got a hockey stick and I'm ready to use it, so anyone in range has had a chop to the shins. YAAAHH - wotchugonnadoabadit?

Twinkle I'm very sorry to hear your sad news, what a horrible thing to go through agian

Twinks so sorry to read your news.

Oh Twinkle I'm so sorry.

This BESH game is so fucking harsh at times.

No words seem right.

(also thinking of Riebie and family)

Oh, my poor Twinks Am so very, very sad and so very, very sorry for you. It's just so incredibly shitty and unfair. Don't hate your self or your body; you have done nothing wrong. Come and have a sit on Auntie Scorpette's knee and I'll rock you and stroke your hair as you have a good cry. We're here for you and will be sending you all our BESHlove for tomorrow XXXX

Twinkle I'm so sorry. xxx

oh BESHies, had no access for a week as was away with work then at a wedding and have no mumsnet at work so its taken me 3 hrs to catch up (8 pages!!!) I know i'm new round here and everyfink but just want to say to twinks and salts i've been thinking of you both while away very much and i am so very sorry that things didn't work out better. don't know what else to say

also chicachorizo at what point did you get sent for dildocam? i am sort of feeling i have been fobbed off with just another round of day3 and day21s at my frst FC appointment. do these people not realise TIME IS RUNNING OUT? (or is that just the menkul talking?)

aww looks like i spent to long catching up! have to catch you all tomorrow evening for a saucy leer and a group wedgie as am now off to try and muster the enthusiasm for some completely pointless SWIing (fear we have missed the boat AGAIN with ill timed trip to germany/brizzle etc.)

Colouring in job? Welcome back HealthyFood. We are a bit miz around here tonight..

Stinker thanks for pointing out hydration. I have often wondered about this. He takes very, very little liquid, especially for a big bloke. I have been nagging and nagging...