30s TTC - Our BESH GussetWatch Ever, With Guest Star Joe Mangel!

[Scorpette]

Come on in, you raddled old caaaaahs, whotchoo waitin' for?

I've gone for a groovy 60s psychedelic theme, so get your fat upper arms comfy in the hanging globe chairs and hide your mememe shame in the glow of the lava lamps!

Russell Howard is our new bartender, although I don't think he's happy at the flares 'n' kipper tie outfit I've forced him to wear. And of course, Mitchell is in the pit, nervously awaiting his first guest.

Let's make this one diffalicious!

Just a quick morning all.

Laying a bit low this week - got another exam so need to be studying, plus am generally trying not to think (fullstop) so am just keeping busy (such well turned out cupboards I have now) and hence not posting loads.

Headster if it's any consolation my implantation bleeding was later than that, so might just be droid mindal fuckage. Is that consoling? I have no idea. Hope a bit so anyway.

Am jealous of Scorps night. That NEVER happens to me!

Massive massive luck to CapricornOne

Oooh, I like ... I some more votes on Mitchell/Cleggie sarnie down in the pit. That's it. I am pushing Cleggster down there. I am sure it's a better position than the one he is currently in! Ma'swearer I know what you mean by oily but come on! As much as DC?? That is where I draw my line. Otherwise, I know I have a dirty tendency towards public school boys (or preppy boys, depending where you come from) in European suits. I have been teased about this. And must point out CH is nothing of the sort. Go figure.
Banger, what stage of tests are you at?

Well, I guess my MIL is generally ok. Though me mum would like more family-like contact, but MIL is a bit like scorp's in terms of emotion display. Including her own children. I always blamed it on her Englishness, but I may be sterotyping . Am I? Tell me there is hope my Englishman won't turn into an emotionless iceberg with any potential offspring! I am teasing. He is very soppy actually. Opposite of his mum.

I shall take that consolation Cassaeopiea (and no I am NOT going to look that up). I thought of you last night as I woke up at 3am sweating about whether planning to have a baby whilst studying was as insane as it seems. Yes! Comes the glad reply. Oh well! You're my role model.

Mountie we British do tend towards the chill, so don't fret about stereotyping. I mean not all of us it must be said. And not chill exactly. I for one will smother folk in hugs and kisses, but it is almost impossible to get me to admit to being upset or cross about something. The idea of falling out with someone seems to me to the height of vulgar display. I will suffer years and years of silent loathing for someone rather than risk an argument. It's VERY healthy I'm sure

As to tests - just having the basic MOT. Had my Day 2 bloods, got my dildocam coming up, all that.

Well, headster as it's turning out that we are nothing like one-shag-and-voila! I am starting to be a believer in 'it's never a right time', though it used to annoy the shit out of me when people told me that years ago. I guess thruthfully it is more of a right time for us than it has ever been. Though I could always think of reasons to wait.

On the plus side the GP told me this morning I am very young . Should report on that but do not feel like it. Generally ok, though we are off to the FC. Any experience with UCL anyone?

Thanks for not taking it badly Banger. Well, I do not really believe in stereotypes (Better clear that up before I start sounding like people's IL's!), but I have been known to stereotype when it comes to MIL. Maybe IL's bring out the worst in people? Well, I am sure our ickle potential offspring will be nice an confuzzled.

Controversially, I believe very firmly in national types, having lived abroad for 6 months somewhere as different as different can be, and been confounded and confuzzled by the grillions of ways we misunderstood each other at every turn. Anyone who thinks there's absolutely no such thing as national character whatsoever ain't terribly well travelled. And anyone that thinks that's a bad thing is a maniac . Variety & diversity keeps the world turning, in my HUMBLEST of opinions...

Hurrah for youngery! Glad all was generally OK, also. I agree re. right-timeness and sometimes think having liberty to exercise control over our reproductory shenanigans is of course good and wondrous but does throw up a whole new set of challenges...

Fairy Was also told that am very young . Is amazing that the Daily Hate is determined to convince us that we have left it all too late and are barren and selfish and hateful, then when you actually get into the hands of the medics it turns out none of that is true. What were the numbers like?

Hurrah! TNB's am-I-a-mutant? tests are back, and it turns out that he isn't! First good news of this whole bastard process. Pliz to join me in a Dance of Joy.

Hooray for non-mutantness!

Pencil tis all perfectly possible, thanks to the wonders of Gina Ford-style routines and Cbeebies. Did 2 hours study at lunch today whilst minicaz slept, will do another 2 tonight when he goes to bed. Tis all doable.

Going to GP on Thurs, going to ask for initial blood tests. Only been 9 months but going to lie about that, seeing as it's been 9 months of shag every viable day and piss on sticks every other type menkulness.

Not much else to say. Chanelling Gary Barlow:
Said it all, nothing to say at all, nothing to say that matters.......

HugeLaurie Re. lube...if you are only using the goop for it's super diff-inducing qualities, rather than the need to lube up - then why not shove it up there afterwards...otherwise it can be so slippery that it's hard to get 'purchase', so to speak.

Good news, PerfectDayImGladISpentItWith You TNB can now go back to swaggering round like he's Cock'o'the walk again!

Just posted elsewhere that following recent SWI-ng, the song that acarried us through the post-coital haze was called 'Implantation'...that's gots to means something, tell me it's so!

Latest update re. me is that I am booked onto IVF info session on 26th May, although no date for actual treatment yet, but nevermind, eh?

Info session is progress? Do you have any idea how long it takes to progress from that to treatment? (weeks? months? am hoping it's the weeks end of things)

Perfection I pretty much told the GP the same: certain members of the press are responsible for all that scaremongering! She thought I was nice and early for even thinking of trying now. Daily Hate et al. should not be allowed to scaremonger like that! (About all sort of stuff.) Please forgive me, but what and why were the mutant tests? I seem to have missed that bit.

Cho good news re. session. I'll be thinking of you. Unless I get muddled again like I seem to have done with ThePerfectOne. CSSRL I am amazed at your efficiency! Here I am trying to do some work the whole day and it ain't happening!

YYYAAAYYYY! TNB's non-mutant status is only the start of Good Things happening for you, Camikaze! 'Bout bloody time you got a break!

And huzzah for Chokehold's info sesh - at last the ball is rolling!

PS Mountbatten, my family aren't stereotypically British, emotionally, at least - we are very tactile, always saying 'I love you' and giving compliments, and are very open about everything and no topic is verboten and we discuss and work through feelings and probs, etc. In fact, we're so bloody expressive, more than one person has darkly suggested that we could with a bit of emotional repression

Scorper I was talking about your IL's earlier (just in case you thought I was comparing my MIL to your family). Can you give me tips? How do you maintain that jolly freaky love? That's how me and my hubby are, but both of our families are weird in v. different ways.

Exciting stuff!!!!!!!!! Gordon is to go and Nick's starting discussions with Labour (when we allow him out of the pit that is). We may get our wish after all.

Gordon - you have done the right thing.

Camel, I'm now anxious to know how old you are if you were told you were very young. I want to know how young I am! Hooray for the non-mutantness!

Gah, I'm finding this Polly Ticks stuff infuriating. My heart yearns for a lib/lab pact for all the obvious reasons, not the least of which is keeping that vile soft-faced Bolly-swigging yacht-fucking Eton catamite Osborne out of number 11. But then there'd be instability which would be disastrous for the markets, and a second successive unelected PM, and they haven't promised a referendum on electoral reform, and however much I'd like to heave the entire Tory party into the Regent's Canal they did get the greatest proportion of the votes, and so having a coalition of the losers seems to an ignoramus like me to make something of a mockery of the Election. I think I am going to just think about kittens and cupcakes and leave all this difficult stuff to the men, to debate over their port and cigars...

I don;t think anyone really knows what they are doing - which feels rather like my day today.

Oh dears. I just did blurty menkulness at Fattys R Us. Have not been very successful and was trying to explain in a non-direct fashion why that might be. The leader woman didn't really get it and said some stuff about "there'll always be something". And then I did the whole blurty thing. Ooops.

Am not sure group weight loss is really for me at the moment.

Come here for a grope EmoBand (tenuous, I know!) never mind FatFighters, just stay at home and eat dust on your own...at least it wont cost you owt!

Mmm, dust. Well the last slice of chocolate cake is a week old now, it's probably a bit dusty even with the being covered. Still good though.

Bollocks to Marjorie Dawes and her tactless platitudes! You're gorgeous Muser, and to prove it, I'll let you have a free go on Mitchell. He only shags hotties y'know!

Aries, where are you? How was today?

Am here . Today not that great I'm afraid. Had to see business adviser and accountant and the accountant has messed up our accounts, yet appears to feel it's reasonable to charge us to correct them, and until he does that the bank won't consider any kind of loan. Anyone an accountant? Is that standard practice? Plus mother is still here and has found out about the ttc and is being a bit mad about it. Clearly she doesn't think I'm up to the task. She also started talking about IVF and adoption when she found out we're on cycle 5. Cycle 5? FFS! Oh but then added that of course we couldn't be considered for adoption as we're probably too old.

BTW, FairyLiquid, the key to full emotional expression is to be a bit mental. I'm also basically unemployable as I am incapable of respecting authority, not speaking my mind and of not putting people in their place if they're arses, boss or not. The downside of being that open is also the arguments. We. Don't. Hold. Back.

cho yeah the goop is for super-diffed quality only. So I'll try it on me own afterwards. Oh joy.

That's also fab news about moving along with IVF. Really pleased & have a very good feeling about it.

aries surely, surely arse-wipe of an accountant can't expect you to pay to correct his fuck up? How can that be? That said it may be a small price (metaphorically speaking) to pay to get the end result you want. Alternatively if you want to send us BESH's around to slap ac-cunt-ant with a wet fish, you let us know.

How did your mum find out about TTC? I'm close to my mum, but haven't told her. I'm sure she knows though, she always seems to know everything somehow. I kind of feel its gone too far for me to tell her now coz I've had some treatments etc. Also if your mum has gone into adoption mode after 5 cycles, my mum will spontaneously combust at my 36 cycles.

I think my family are typically British. Only see above. We're close, but don't open up much, we rely on mind reading skills. Which I have to say aren't too bad, especially between mum, sis & me. My dad feels totally left out when the 3 of us have a conversation full of "thingmagigs, wotsits & oojas" & know who & what we're talking about.

In other news I've cricked my back - drying my fucking hair - & it hurts every time I take a deep breath. Tonight is meant to be shagalicious. Fucking A!

Oh, & if I don't win this month am going back to FC. At the start of this process with GPs' etc I was in a bit of a daze. Only now has it dawned on me I've only had day 21 bloods which were fine. Eh? There's no day 3 bloods to compare it to. Also fine. What's "fine"? I have no idea of figures. Together with the times I've taken my temp my charts being all over the shop does make me wonder if all is as it should be. And therefore Clomid may not be the answer.

Sorry, bit mememe. Just thinking out loud really.