Mid 30s TTC - Simply The BESH... BESHer than all the rest!

[Scorpette]

Come on in, ladies. I've had a widescreen telly installed and there's a big cupboard full of 80s teen movies if anyone's interested. New and more secure cages for our prey are being delivered soon. There's a big picture of a desert over the bar, a loudly ticking clock in the corner and bowls of raisins, currants and sultanas on every table; everything the discerning BESH could ask for...

The only act I've seen live which I adored and didn't start a fight at (because I was too scared running the gauntlet of lesbos) was Ani DiFranco. Breathtakingly good. I squealed (and the lesbians turned and GLARED!) when she said she'd written my favourite song backstage in the venue we were at.

I am on the cusp, I'm half capricorn and half away with the fairies aquarius.

Well, I'd want The Pixies even if we weren't the Kimdeal loving starfuckers that we are. PIXIES PIXIES PIIIIIXIIEEEEEES!

Pony, The Killers are rubbish. I think you were just trying to think of a cool 'yoof' band, weren't you? Look, Vera Lynn is still alive and well, so we'll get her in so you can have some music you recognise

of Montreal were bloody brilliant live. Would like to see The White Stripes. Am happy with everyone else's choices. Would also like to see Tilly And The Wall, as they employ a tap dancer instead of a drummer for rhythm, which must make for a top live experience. Can we also ban flags, cos I'm a midget.

Cunty, I like to keep things subtle, y'know. Everyone will just thing it's me riffing on my whole 'baby-desperate' persona I used to do in my old blog and which I kinda do in person. Little do they know that the mentalism was/is not exaggerated for comic purposes Also, it's a crock of shit anyway, as, on 10th Oct, will either be droiding or just recovering from his visit. Talking of droiding, am pretty certain the metal bastard is arriving soon.

Changing subject completely, did anyone else see the Ch 4 documentary on the Jaycee Lee Dugard scandal? Love the way that commentators are now saying that he and his wife kidnapped her because the wife was a BESH and he was desperate for someone to provide him with a family (and so was she). Always gotta be a BESH's fault, right?

All good choices for BESHfest - I wish to add:

R.E.M

I agree. I actually managed to get tickets for their '95/96 tour and Bill Berry thoughtlessly had a brain haemorrhage and it was cancelled. Cheek of the man!

I also want The Ramones. It's either them or me screeching Blitzkreig Bop via my (nearly) BIL's Rock Hero game.

blitzkrieg, fucksticks.

scorp that was at least 4. Which is Not Allowed.

Ps the 155% etc was (I thought obviously,but maybe not) not to be taken seriously,have been around a lot of wankers salespeople lately and was on automock

I was thinking of the Ramones as my second choice, but then I thought I might be forgeting someone even better... I'm still holding out - only at 50%!

(mental note: let midget stand in front)

Game over - first signs of droid plus usual pre-period massive poo clearout (tmi?). Late ovulation plus R2D2 coming 4 days early = happyhappy joyjoy. Hilariously, I've always had worst period day (3 or 4) on a work day - and I've just had my hours moved and new droid ensures cramps on new different day at work. Does my reproductive system hate me?

This also means that it'll also be R2D2 on my birthday, which is exactly four weeks today (Thurs.). Because nothing could make your 37th birthday more fun than babyfail and cramps

SULK.

Hello BESH's
Havent posted in ages as works been manic (start of term!) but have been trying keeping up to date thanks to blackberry. Unfortunatly my baby brain means that i don't remember my name most days so trying to remember 18 pages worth of posts is never going to happen.

Scorp wouldnt worry about Rh- as i'm Rh- and the Eurospunk that knocked me up is Rh+ so just means i get stuck with a needle of Anto D at 28 and 34 weeks

*Takes a sneaky swig of a large G&T)

Man, I really want to go to Beshfest. Collectively we have great music taste. I've been listening to a compilation my bff made for me recently (that's best friend forever, for all you temporally-challenged ladies, not husband person who is fucking musically-challenged meaning that I have to co-exist with Future Sound of London and other ridiculous dance/trance/electronica things) and am currently obsessing about Martha Wainwright - c'mon, who doesn't love a woman who can call a song Bloody Mother Fucking Asshole?

Scorp Evil droid. Why do you think your ovulation point has moved, though? If is from peeing on sticks, disregard immediately as they are the work of Satan and all his little imps. Or some part of the pregnancy-industrial complex conspiring to keep women poor by making them spend all their money on conception-related tools.

Ahem. It is very early. Morning, all.

Gah. Why do people ask if they might be pregnant in this forum, especially if they're stressing about the possibility? It is of the uber-tactless. And quite daft, unless the magic eyes of the interweb can see inside their wombs.

Obviously I'm not referring to any collective symptom-spotting, as that is totally different...

camel I've thought exactly the same. TTC is preggo code for "Barren wimmin reside here". Maybe she can follow it up with a "can anyone recommend an abortion centre?"

Scorps I too am sorry to hear of the arrival of the droid. The poo-droppage is familiar with me too - apparently it's the progesterone surge and I think it's one of the thing which helped the early-mc click in to place mentally. I had a big fat poo y'see.

Wooh makingafamily how are you feeling? Good info about the Rhesus stuff - see? We're a wealth of knowledge here. Front bum sex and everyfink!

scorp sorry mate. Bastard fucking robot. It's shit when your cycles change in apparently random fashion as you just don't know where you are..similar thing happened to me but seems to be returning to more or less normal...so hopefully it'll stop pissing you about soon.

camel I saw Martha wainwright live a while back. Excellent, and she's so sweet!

BESH-fest

Abba
Madness
Kasabian

OK, OK I can't count, but I can't decide between them either!

1. BESHfest - Take That, of course. Abba/Killers/Chillis

1. Facebook - I don't think I've found everyone yet. I LOVE the Challenge Anneka/Bond Girl comments - my life is occasionally quite fun hence babyfear. But Ski, pot/kettle - you are much more Anneka than I am.

1. Facebook part 2 - I fancy Scorps . And her brother.

1. The Droid has arrived.

Slightly freaky but - Scorps and I got the droid on the same day - and we also share our birthday! (Yes I am the exception to the scorpion rule that says you have to me completely mental).

Thanks for the commiserations, my BESHren. But have had spot-free toilet paper... so far and temp still up. Am going to Wilkos for a clawhammer to beat to death the evil sprite on my shoulder hissing 'implantation bleed!'. I know it's not. Also because it's quite unnerving to have a sprite on your shoulder, like

Lyra, BOOHISS to the evil Droid. Are we all synchronising on here like us wimminz supposedly do when living together (certainly happened to my gang of pals at uni)?! Poor you. But I have just stalked your pics and I also fancy you. However, you are a tall, slender, gorgeous blonde, living in glam sourrounds, whereas I look like someone has squashed Anna Friel downwards and outwards and given her some novelty teeth to wear and I give my address to anyone driving as 'the first apartment block after Aldi'. My brother, however, is ridiculously good-looking. He got more looks, I got more brains. And he does have a freakishly massive arse; it's quite hilarious.

Gin -

Camel, OV dates based on POK but also on knowing own personal signs: no FFJ or monstrous horniness till 3rd wk of cycle In my 2nd m of TTC I had a crazy-woman ep of 3-4 days where I was crying constantly cos I was obsessed with thought of never having kids and I think the stress of that shifted it (oh, the irony!). But I presumed it would go back to normal. But that would be too easy, wouldn't it Read that late OV means you're producing inferior or infertile eggs - TYF has banned me from all TTC-related Googling for the foreseeable future I need to get a f-t job, so I don't have too much time on my hands to fret like a twat.

Who are peeps slagging off? It's not me and my TWOOFL madness, is it?

Woohoo, BIRTHDAY TWINS! What year were you born, Lyra?

What do you mean about mental? We Scorpios are supremely controlled, cool and unreadable at all times.

I'm married to a Scorpio (a halloween one at that) - and can confirm you are all bonkers.

BESHfest loving the picks so far, and will add something old and something new:-

Deacon Blue (pauses for laughs) and Airborne Toxic Event

Curly If you're having Deacon Blue then I demand Del Amitri.

Scorp No, if (perish the thought) I was going to slag of your 2WOOFL insanity, I'd probably just, y'know, call you mad. There was a thread entitled Sorry. Could I be pregnant which I read at a godawful hour of this morning and which REALLY pissed me off.

I'm still spotting but my temp went up this morning. In fairness, it did this last month as well, so I know it's not an implantation bleed, but it doesn't stop me from thinking it might be. How's that for fucked-up logic?

Ha, Leo here so stick that up yer arse.

So the good news is that my thyroid is totally normal. The bad news is that I have a broken toe. Ow.

Camel, my temp went down and part of me thought 'implantation bleed n dip!', whereas it's clearly my temp going down as the Dastardly Droid approacheth. Fertily Friend is now saying 85% likely pg, but it lies, it lies!

On the Starsign tip again, TYF is also a Scorpio. You'd think that'd be a nightmare, but we're so alike (antisocial, possessive, misanthropic, over-sensitive, snide, sarky sense of black humour, etc.) that we have a really chilled, happy, unstressy relationship. We save Teh Evul for others [bwahaha emoticon]

Although, of course, as a Militant Atheist, I think Astrology is a load of rubbish

Poor Cosmo. The toe, I mean, not being a Leo Good nooz about the thyroid, but.

There will be NO Deacon Blue - I nearly ended up in a special pedants' psychiatric ward in my teens from exloding in rage when they used to sing 'I'll do what I should've did'. AAARRRRGH!

Quick, Nurse! My shot!

I want The Smiths. Must have The Smiths.

Cosmo I am a Leo too. But I wasn't going to say anything because I am scared of Scorpette don't believe in this astrology rubbish.

In two minds about The Smiths. Love the music, but Morissey does hold views not unlike those of a racist ape (David Quantick said so, so it must be right).

Interpol!

Modest Mouse!

The Postal Service!

Interpol! Yes!

Would be The Smiths for music only for me too.

I was only joking about the Leo thing (MIL is one, though ).

I want Neutral Milk Hotel. I know no-one else will have heard of them, but they're one of my faves. And The Fiery Furnaces. And Os Mutantes. Oooooh, and The Sonics. Must have Sonics (the 60s band, not Sonic Yoof).

Can we go back in time and have some Soft Cell? Showing my age dreadfully now, will slink off.

That stupid post you mentioned is indeed pregnant. 'My period is one day late and I've only had sex once, using a condom - am I pg?'. No, you daft bint, just one day late! (Knowing our luck, she's prolly so dense that she will be).