Emmsys Onwards & Upwards part VII - hand-holders and hair-strokers welcome!

[cupcakefairy]

Shiny new thread for us

The race is on for the first BFP!

Thanks girls

I know it will take a while to settle back down, i just wondered if my first day of bleeding was counted as cd1 or not, which i will now say that it is roughly, im well prepared for my first proper af, just wondered what normally happens after mc as its my first one

Barbie you can take paracetamol - that is considered perfectly safe You could start with half the adult dose and see if it helps ? It probably will, bearing in mind you won't have been taking any medication for a while so your body will be less used to it

Make sure you drink lots of water - and get off the PC and rest your eyes

Food-wise - back to normal (ish) today. I don't think the hunger is nearly as bad as yesterday, and really don't want to destroy my diet more than it is already, so I'm trying to resist eating more. I've just had a bowl of All Bran, a banana, some low fat crisps, ham salad sandwich and a cereal bar. Have an apple and a pear to snack on this afternoon, then eating out tonight !! Symptoms - well creamy cm has dried up, boobs not sore at all. I keep wondering if I'm feeling a heaviness / mild cramping in my abdomen but it is so gentle, I'm probably imagining it !!

Hey Fifi went off to get waxed (& do some work!) so think the girls have pretty much covered the answers, but I echo them, we are all diff, so no hard & fast rule of when you ov post mc - 2wks to 2m (tho rare!) Like Mermaid says tho, our bodies & hearts need time to heal, so please be gentle on yourself. I fell within 2/3 cycles after 3 of my mc, now after the 4th its been 8cycles & nowt but im finally in a place where Im happy cos I know that its given me time to come to terms with it all, scream, shout, cry, learn to laugh again, and heal! Know the desperation to be pregnant again tho hon but we're with you on the rollercoaster! Good luck!

Poor Barbiebigpants drink lots of water & put your feet up, paracetamol ok... You & Mermaid will be pleased to kno before my wax I popped in the natural health remedy clinic & got leaflets on reflex! The beauty salon does do it too but this place has therapists with medical training so altho still under the premise that this is a 'pamper treatment' Im going for it! (despite the leaflet being for fertility services!) Yea bring on the zen like aura! My chi is feelin good!

Jools thats lots to eat still! Ive had a bowl of frosted shreddies for brekkie & a twister from KFC for lunch! (told you I eat crap!) Im at your meal in smithfields - v trendy! Lots of nice bars round there too - you'll have a good one! x

4Ever - tis a good time to eat out - we got a 50% off food offer through toptable.com

I'd be up for an Emmsys meet-up in or around London IF anyone wanted to, but I fully understand that some ppl want to keep more anonymous after sharing so many intimate details with people they have never met [grn]

just want to echo what the other ladies have said, watch out for the EWCM and BD from there. Have you tried taking your basal body temp? Very handy for finding out when you've OVed (unless you're a chronic insomniac a la moi ) If/When the horror-mones get you, we'll be here to hold your hand I had 3 MCs in 6 months before I found these lovly ladies, and now on 4th cycle since with no BFP joy. Think it's done me the world of good to have some time off from yoyoing between small and medium pants so even if af takes a while to get you, think of it as your body giving you time to heal.

CD14 here and textbook OV today . Think I've put the frighteners on DH by ringing him at lunch time and telling him that it's "O-day" . Just in case this has given him stage fright, BDing 2 days before OV is close enough to conceive isn't it?

hi hoping nice to see you yep i think its ok 2 days before, jools is the best one to ask!
Good luck for this evening

Yup - 2 days before should be OK

In theory, sperm can live for up to 5 days in EWCM and wait for the egg. In reality, Fertility Friend says 2 - 3 days is more likely. Oh, and the egg can live for 12 - 24 hours once released.

I'm certainly hoping this is true - BD Sat AM, felt OV pains Sunday overnight and during Monday (and am cramping now at 4DPO

Not being of the white coat brigade, I can't help - better to leave it to the experts.

Fifi we are all different, if you want to go for it, well at least it's fun trying

Mermaid - organized mum life books rock. I bought my first one last year after missing the first non uni day at school. Since, then I've not missed anything ( she says smiling smugly to herself!). I also have the weekly fridge board which is equally great

Annie Thanks for your message - day was absolutly fine, I was away with work . Sadly DH didn't mention it - not sure that he even remembered..... But then he was home alone with a 5 year old being star daddy ( he even took her to Hamleys!), so I forgive him. Also BabyVjay was born that morning, so there was some lovely news that kind of took the edge off.

LovelyNeeko - So pleased to hear about LittleWriggler . 11 + 2 is great news

Barbie - Sorry to hear about your bleeding and pain but relieved its all OK and that you have entered the world of big pants!

Gracie Hope yesterday was OK, hon.

Sorry, ladies but saving the biggest waves for all the small pants team - it has to be your turn soon
Phew - monster post - need to lie down now!

Hi LBM - where do I get an organised Mum book from then? I currently use combination of work diary/Charlie and Lola calender in kitchen . Glad to hear your EDD wasn't too . As the others have said, its the run up that's the worst bit....

4ever - so delighted that you are a-ok 'doon there' and you are continuing with your massages and looking into reflexology. Your posts are always so honest and good to read . Liked your Scottish 'och' too .

Neeko - another example of NHS caring for once re: your scan. So delighted it all went well and you are continuing to be wrapped in cotton wool by EPAS. 11 + 2 is just brill.

Fifi - mermaid makes a really good point about giving your body/emotions time to recover and sometimes our bodies do it themselves by delaying a future BFP until we're ready to carry baby. I tried right away both times and looking back wish I'd waited longer after first one (fell pg on 2nd cycle) as was not emotionally ready for the stresses of early pg and 2nd mmc felt almost inevitable . Having had both natural mc and ERPC, I think our bodies take longer after natural as there can be residual clots to come away. BUT saying all that, it is entirely up to how you and your DP feel so good luck and fingers crossed with whatever you decide.

MM and Annie - glad I'm not the only one at the mercy of heartburn . Annie -I work Mon/Wed/Fri.

Off to wedding at Castle tonight, v. excited and hope my dress's glamour rubs off on me .

lbm I already missed something but in my defence i hadn't finished filling it in. Mine has a lovely red leather cover and I have used all the stickers
I am attempting my first ever link hold on www.boxhousepublishing.com
blue they do pregnant things and baby first year things too.
Have a total fab time in that dress tonight, hope you are all ok up there in Scotland with this awful weather.

fifi sorry lovely lady, I think you could possibly count bleeding as day 1 - my white coat sn't very white

vjay Algenon? Pedro? Clive? euchhhhh
they will get worse so come on girlxxx

beam see I can go work in an office

You are clever mermaid gold office star for you .

I'm having a quick lurk whilst painting my nails (vampy red/black).

Its actually sunny up here right now after 43 days of rain...

A quick pinot grigio fuelled hellloooooooo from Farringdon station .....hic !!!

Hello Jools - sounds like you had a good night!!

Hello all, just popping in quickly.

4ever so pleased for you & your scan. You are sounding like you are in a very calm,happy & most of all healthy place. Let the gourmet bd'ing begin!

Fifi I echo what Hoping said about temping. I've found it absolutely invaluable, especially after my mc's to tell me exactly what my body is doing.

I've not been on much for the last couple of days as my parents have been staying with us & last night dh & I went to a party next-door while my parents babysat. It was a brilliant party on a Midsummer Nights Dream theme. We let our neighbours cut a hole through the fence at the bottom of our gardens & as a surprise to the guests the end of our garden was done up like a fairy grotto & four of us put on a 20 minute play for them which was such a laugh! It was like walking through the hedge into Narnia & nobody had a clue what was going on!

On another note I've been getting a niggling back pain for the last few days - Barbie you had that in the early days didn't you? Also woke up in the night & thought I as going to barf in bed, so happy days!

Will catch up properly tonight. Have a lovely day everyone.

mls your night sounds fab!
yes i had v bad back pain and tbh it still comes and goes...some days i would cry lying on the bed Where is your pain? is it one sided? i hope you are ok...i put a heat pack on it and i now know thanks to the girls above ^^^ that you can take soomething for the pain...i hope it eases soon.
I still have a headache, went to bed at 8.30 but found it strange without dh so a restless night for me...today im still really tired, can hardly keep my eyes open...still 3 and a half more hours in work to go. I thought this was the stage where you have the most energy??? i have zero Im still feeling sick too, oh and i have all small bumps on my forehead...happy days!!!

jools how is your head this morning {grin]

bugger. dh was not interested. he claims he needs 2-4 days between BDing to "recover" so we've missed it for this month.

Third time in 4 cycles this has happened. He claims it's totally normal to only be able to manage to BD twice a week...at 23...

I just want a baby but I can't do it on my own

October BFP it is then!

hoping dont give up yet!!! You still bd the other day didnt you? and remember you might ovulate late (fingers crossed emotion) i learnt the hard way not to tell dh when i was ovulating..after a night of crying myself to sleep when he, like your dh refused...a month later i got my bfp.

Although at 23 he is more than capable to manage!!!

Hoping you have my sympathies. My husband had been very much the same until I had the mc's & he seemed to then step up a gear & realise that if we were to have another child he'd have to put some effort in. Mind you, we are in our 40's. It doesn't help much but perhaps your dh thinks that as you are both in your 20's it doesn't matter if he drags his heels? It's difficult isn't is as your instinct is to put some pressure on him & have a major strop & say "Do you realise how important this is?" but by doing that it will only have a detrimental effect on his libido. Maybe somebody else here has some suggestions?

hoping yep girl its time to get devious sorry to say it but sometimes what else can a girl do?

1. I know we are all lovely au natural but go and splash some cash on some new undies - now I may once have saved them but curly I think advocated flashing them more regularly throughout the month. Genius cos then dh won't think he is being lured by female siren for one specific reason.

1. never ever mention opks, temps,circle the night on calendar etc. The air of mystery should rein oVER your female machinations.

1. Pretend to be uninterested - reverse phycology (s* cant spell that this morning) works well with simple creatues such as men. I think that may have been c/o jules*

1. If all the above fail do a 4ever and take some sausages out of the oven

barbie ouch to your head and being knackered. It sounds like the heat of Dubai has sucked your energy away. Rest lots over the weekendx

jools is probably eating cold pizza with an ice pack on her head

mls what a lovely sounding party you are all dead sophisticated up country. I'm lucky to turn up at a party with a plate of frozen sausage rolls and watch drunk men on kids trampolines

blue you too with nails done and that dress, hope you had a faby time.

vjay fernando? fergus? Faustus?

Morning all!
We're all up and posting early today

Fifi IME you should wait until AF before trying. Mermaidthewiseone advised me to do this and I didn't listen but I'd have saved myself a whole lot of heartache if I did. I think the desperation to be pg again blinds us to how much we need time to recover. It took me 3 bizarrely long cycles and we BD a LOT butI honestly believe my body needed longer to give this lo a fighting chance. On the other hand, you'll be a head case whenever you fall pg again, but that's what we're here for.Oh, and another thumbs up for temping here too. Cupcakethelovely is a real temping expert. She's on a break right now but lurks and would post if you had a question, I'm sure.

Hoping I think you're still in with a good chance, but maybe him indoors will change his mind and you can try again tonight. Remember MC is very scary for them too and they don't understand why they can't protect us from the pain. A refusal to BD at the right time could be a subconscious effort to protect you. Men are stupid sometimes, I know!

LBM Hello lovely. I'm so glad to see you're posting again. I've missed you. I hope you're planning on sticking around, even if it's just so you and mermaid can go commando and teach us all how to be organised mums.

MLS Hope the party was fun. It sounds great. Now it's my turn to tell you to chill. Thursday will come at its normal pace - it just feels like it's dragging. Is your DH watching the game today? Mine left for work this morning clutching his ticket with feverent hope in his heart - again!

Blue Hope the wedding went well and you didn't show up the bride in your gorgeous dress with your pregnancy glow

Barbie Hope you're having some fun home alone and that you've ordered your DH to buy you some 4head at the airport on the way back.

Vjay Pull yourself briefly out of your lovely bubble to give us some details, please. Some of mermaid's guesses are making my eyes water.

Jools hope you're hangover is not as spectacular as your night out I have everything crossed for you this month. It's well past your turn.

Big waves to everyone else, especially the lovelylurkers. I hope you all have a good weekend.

Postman just arrived with my exemption from prescription charges certificate. I didn't get that far last time - yay!

the smallest thing is a milestone.
Have a great weekend.

Helloooooo

No hangover I think we managed 4 bottles of wine between 3 of us last night Twas a lovely girlie evening. I have been to the gym this morning - just having brunch and am off to a cat show this afternoon to meet some friends and stock up on supplies

Barbie - hope your head is improving

Neeko - good news on getting your exemption cert Down here, they fill out the paperwork when you first see the GP, so they arrive really early - I've had to send two back so have resolved to stick with the EPAU and not see the GP till later this time.

Vjay - Gilbert, Gerontius, Geranium ?

MLS - love the sound of your fairy grotto Perhaps we can kit out Mermaid's greenhouse like that

Hoping - I've had very similar problems, but my DP is 44 ! We've only managed twice this month, which is pretty much the best we can manage within the fertile window. We only managed that because I ov'ed on Bank Holiday Monday and we had a fairly boozy weekend I echo what others have said - don't, whatever you do, let him know what time of the month it is. Just be a bit sexy - take him out for a spontaneous meal mid-week, crack open some wine and suggest drinking it in bed, get some pre-seed and tell him you want to try it just for fun (don't tell him what it is for !)

Hello to everyone else - the sun is out, so enjoy the weekend

girls look out for a lovely lady named buckler i have sent her our way for lots of supportive hugs, mermaids wine and jools wise words! and of course all the help we can all give her.

jools im glad you didnt have a hangover, i think im having one for you ...minus the drink of course