First Timers TTC. Safe space for brain dumps, questions, whinges and celebrations. Part 2!

[TinyDancer91]

Hi All.

This is a continuation from my past thread, but no need to go read that one if you're new here!

Quick TD;LR from the old post (but with up to date info) - I'm 31, OH is 35. We are TTC baby #1. Been TTC since Jan 2022, now on cycle 14. Haven't told anyone to avoid pressure.

Feel free to post any questions, thoughts, whinges, celebrations, basically anything here!

Going to try to be a bit more positive than I was toward the end of the last thread 😂

Love & baby dust to all. Wishing for BFPs for everyone this year 💖

Thanks @Feliciacat** we just have to keep trying. Did some blood tests last month and all came back normal so at least that's good.

I am using OPK every month now. It does take some of the stress off me as I kind of know when I should be getting busy.

It's a good idea to test much later to be honest, probably saves money on the pregnancy tests too! But unfortunately I am terrible and will test on my AF due date. Maybe I should try to hold it off as well. Eek.

@Kayycatt oh I didn’t mean to sound like I was telling you what to do with regard to when to test; I just know that I personally would be very upset if I knew I had had a miscarriage. So for me, ignorance is bliss!

I’m glad your bloods were normal and that you’re finding OPK helpful. This thread is so exciting! Can’t wait to find out what’s in store for everyone!

Hi all I hope you don’t mind me joining, I’m 32 and my husband is 42 we have been TTC number 1 for a while now, sort of since October 2021 but was referred by my gp in January 2022 to nhs fertility treatment as naturally isn’t an option (hoped for a miracle from October - January) as I don’t ovulate naturally very often due to bad PCOS. So going into medicated cycle 6 hopefully on Monday!

@Feliciacat oh no, not at all! I think it's a good idea to test later to save some disappointment to be honest, it's just me being impatient. I will keep my fingers crossed for you on Valentine's Day. 

@Alexis7890 sorry to hear about your PCOS, all the best with cycle 6.

@Kayycatt thank you, I’m surprisingly chilled about the PCOS as I’ve known for years that I’d need this help so fortunately it wasn’t a surprise. The struggle is partly how blasé some fertility staff are about oh well give you these drugs then you’ll ovulate and get pregnant yay, but 3 out of the 5 cycles so far the meds weren’t working for me so no ovulation and the crushing news of sorry we need to try again and the rollercoaster very similar I imagine to when AF arrives for people trying naturally. Just like when the meds do work but no pregnancy. It’s a rollercoaster isn’t it!! Glad your tests were all okay and you shouldn’t need to go through any treatment!! Hope it goes well for you

@Alexis7890 so sorry to hear about the med and the staff's attitude. It is very hard and the disappointment every month can be very frustrating and I can totally relate. I generally have a little cry when AF arrives and then grumpy for a few days, then start it all over again. It's very draining but will just have to keep going for now. Finger crossed for us.

Actually when I spoke to my GP over the phone, she was basically saying just keep trying but oh you are almost 40, it's a bit late. Actually she mentioned that I am trying too late a few times and I just kept saying 'I know I know'...

Ohh I'm exactly the same everytime AF arrives too! So disappointing isn't it what a roller coaster.

Sorry to hear the gp not been the best either saying unhelpful things like that!! Unfortunately I do think sometimes the medial staff get quiet complacent with it all because they see it fairly often! when I had my miscarriage I got the whole 'oh well least you know you can get pregnant' 'you can just try again and it will probably be alright next time' 🙃obviously wasn't helpful at the time 🤦🏼‍♀️

Hi All 👋🏼

Hope you don't mind me jumping on this post! I'm 33 and DH is 32 and we are ttc our first. I think I'm currently 6dpo but can't be sure as I never actually got a peak on a test - just a line nearly as dark as the control on 6/1 pm. Premom app predicted ovulation on 8/1 and I did have a bit of cramping so I'm going with ovulation as being then! This is only our first cycle trying but dtd plenty during fertile window so I've got everything crossed for a bfp!

Baby dust to all x

@rankin21 sorry about your MC It is true that when they have seen it all, they forget that it's a 'first' for many of us. How long have you been trying? Agree that the monthly disappointment is exhausting but am trying to think positive and be glad that we can try again next cycle.

The only time I felt a little compassion was from the midwife that contacted me as I referred myself to them and forgot about it after my MC. She contacted me for my first scan and I told her about my MC, she sounded sad and understanding, which may sound silly but I felt a little comforting.

Oh I'm so sorry you had to go through that too! But so glad you did feel a little compassion at that point though. As it really can feel awful and like your on your own.

My MC was in feb/March last year took me a few months to really get a grip of myself again if im honest then we were just DTD when we felt like it not been particularly careful but not trying either.

So I'd say this is the 3rd month of us properly trying again now.

AF was due today according to the flo app but my cycles can go from 27-31 days and today is 29th day.

I did do a test last night because we were going out and I didn't want to drink if it was a positive.
It came back as a BFN but unfortunately the Asda didn't have the early test ones it was just a cheap one that says to test a after your missed period.

So I still didn't drink because I've been feeling a little bit odd and my boobs are super soar which was my first sign last time. But I'm really trying not to symptom spot and I won't be testing again until Wednesday unless AF arrives obviously.

I've only been using the app which is what we used last time but I think if I don't get a BFP this month I'm going to try using the ovulation test strips to see how accurate the app is and go from there.

Hi All, hoping I can join the chat and just get a virtual hug more than anything really.

Me and OH are 29 and have been TTC since August. My cycles are a regular 27/28 days and OPK says I'm getting my LH on day 15/16. Realised by October that using normal lube could've been effecting us (as I didn't realise it was a spermicide!). Since November cycle we've used preseed if lube was needed, Nov was BFN. Then December cycle has just happened, bought a fertilily as well (thought why not) and for some reason I ovulated day 19/20 which is strange and then only came on my period today (14dpo, when usually 12dpo). Cycle this month was 32 days instead of 27/28.

Just feeling so frustrated and sad, why did my body do this to me this time, I've not slept for the last few days hoping I'd get my BFP, with nothing. Sorry for a rant I'm sure all of you have felt deflated and defeated I just feel like I'm doing everything to help and nothings working.

What am I doing wrong other than just being a big poo?

Thanks from me and my violin.

Hi everyone, I hope it's ok for me to join. I'm 32 and we have just started TTC. I was on the pill for a decade before so I am interested to see what my cycles are like now. Trying to be chill about it at least to begin with (which is not my default 😅).

Hugs to the PP who need them x

Hi! can I join in as well? I’m 29 and my partner is 27. TTC #1. I had a positive OPK yesterday (first month trying). Hoping for some luck in about ten days. Slightly confused about OPK’s. Are they an indication that you’re ovulating at that moment or that you have ovulated recently? I saw a tiktok that suggested that by the time you get the positive you’re past ovulation. I’m just a little confused about it; it’s all a bit new to me 😂

@Iwouldlikeababyplease oh bless you. Easier to say than it is helpful but it’s natural to few such a range of emotions.

I also genuinely believe that the world has led us all to believe that people click their fingers and BAM pregnant, what a surprise… it’s natural for it to take up to a year and I’ve come to realise peoples struggles (behind social media/public eye) when I’ve had in depth conversations with people - it really does take time (for most anyway 🤣) some are just incredibly fertile or lucky by the seems!!

It sounds as though you’re doing everything right but I didn’t see Folic Acid in your message - that’s a must for TTC and during pregnancy so best get started on that if you haven’t already.

sending you a big virtual hug xx

@IsLarryFromSomething hey & welcome! I was also on the pill since 16 (so over a decade!) I will say that my cycles took perhaps 2 months to get back into the swing of things and then we’re completely normal 🥰 hoping yours will be the same x

@Swiftie12 hiya! As far as I’m aware, a positive OPK means ovulation is going to take place anywhere between 24 to 48 hrs so it’s the next time to get to business 😈

Id recommend investing in a clear blue digital as they’re so much easier to read, tell you when you’re highly fertile AND due to ovulate, and you can buy more inserts so it doesn’t stop being useful.

the first time I used it, I had BFP but it was chemical - having tried for around 3 years, I’ll take that! We’re definitely closer than we were and I think that massively helped.

best of luck 👍✨

Thank you for the response, I very much appreciate a kind note. Oh yes taking all the supplements! Just yeah.... my emotions today are so sad ☹️ thank you

Thank you! That is really good to know. Did you have any side effects coming off the pill? I came off 2 weeks ago, had a normal withdrawal bleed, and this weekend have had some out of character headaches and mild cramping, so I'm wondering if that is my body realising we aren't taking it anymore.

Ahh thank you for this! My MIL has been visiting us over the weekend (perfect timing 🙄) so it’s not been ideal. We managed last night and I’m aiming for tomorrow as well so fingers crossed. I’ve just got cheap strips at the moment as honestly as we’re just starting out my intention was just to wing it and hope we get lucky. I fell down a bit of a tracking rabbit hole and started lurking on here, and now here I am trying to track more. I’ll invest in some clearblue depending on the outcome this month 😊

Im so sorry about your chemical! Sending lots of baby dust your way for the future!

@IsLarryFromSomething dont be alarmed but I had really bad acne! It stopped like 3-6 months but by gosh, it was a nightmare 🤣 I’d say it’s a good sign that you had a withdrawal bleed - I don’t think I had that which was a bit strange.

@Swiftie12 😂 pop and buy a pair of earplugs.. say that there’s sometimes noise outside and so best to use them when in bed 😉

I know the rabbit hole issue… try not to let the hole grow too big because early days it should be exciting and nice (don’t get worried from what you’re reading by us lot 🤣) - it may be that you’ll have no issues whatsoever.

fingers crossed for you!

Oh gosh, thank you for the reassurance that if I get it, it will go away. It's nice to be in a supportive thread as I don't want to speak to too many people in real life about this in case it takes ages!

She’s gone home now luckily so we’re on our own again. My partner seems to be coming down with a cold and I’m not feeling great either so I think it’ll have to be tomorrow for now. Trying to just keep an open mind for now as it’s early days for us. It gets scary seeing posts about others struggling but as we’ve never even tried before we have no idea what kind of time we’ll have but we’ll have to wait and see.

@IsLarryFromSomething youll probably be ok! My skin took ages to adapt to the right pill so it’s probably something to do with that. Also, I had no choice but to relax into it because I knew I needed to come off to TTC 😂 so it was what it was!

the worst thing for me is that I have endometriosis so my periods are horrendous without being on the pill.

@Swiftie12 that sounds a good plan 🥰 best of luck xx