Ttc for what feels like an eternity? Then you've found your bus! No fertile unicorns here, only infertile donkeys!

[notyetamumbuttrying]

Buckling up our are usual riders...and their stats on the fertility/infertility train 🚂
@Annny27 29, no1 since June 19
@RobinRose 27, no1 since Oct 2019
@kerrym87 34 no1 since sept19

@Motherofkittens28 39 no 1 since aug19
@Yutes 34 no1 since aug19
@Crazydoglady123 32 no2 jan19, ivf in April21!
@Marvellouslymadmum 41 no3 since April 18
@Tofu35 35 no1 since sep19
@Hayley19835 38 no1 oct18
@Narwhal88 32, no1 since jun19
@Dogmum13 29 no1 since dec19
@SlothMamaToBe
@Theawkwardblonde no1 for 18 months
@CreativeThinkerTequilaDrinker 15 months ttc ivf in June, ov 8th April
@2020mission 33 no1 14 months ttc
@Sjhigs 37 no1 since sep18 ivf consult mid April
@crazycatlady1981 39 no1 since Oct18, ivf in May
@PeanutButterBrownies
@Juno231 33 no1 since jan20
@clolo 31 no1 since jun19
@Aimzie 28 no1 4 years NTNP 22 months ttc
And me 😊 35 in a matter of hours no1 since sep19, ivf may/June

@Juno231 just said it was gynae investigation and treatment, I think if we need more intervention I'll tell my manager as off duty worked out like 6 weeks in advance. @Narwhal88 fingers crossed for you @Yutes are you in the pcos camp for letrozole or something else? X

@Juno231 my bro is an employment law specialist in HR and advises against. He told me in his experience 9/10 employers will find absolutely any excuse to get rid even though being pregnant is protected - there's no protection at all for TTC!

@Annny27 I've heard of oestrogen dominance which can mess with hormones. And yes all this talk of eggs recently - I definitely need a few golden 1s!

Thanks @kerrym87 I've already switched CCGs now and GP is doing another blood test when strictly she doesn't have to. The rules are a bit of a hard line apparently.

Fi gers crossed for you @Narwhal88 I know ple ty of women who get no symptoms at all!

@Juno231 I would probably go with saying gynaecology testing/treatment like @kerrym87 if you feel you need to share anything and not mention TTC, unless you're boss is nice and you feel your job is safe. I have a controlling unfriendly and unsympathetic boss so definitely wouldn't feel comfortable sharing with him and he's on the board so I'm sure HR would tell him if I spoke to them too. You can be off sick for a week in most jobs before needing a doctors note, right? Hopefully you will be feeling fine after and will be able to work soon after... still working from home right now too? Working at home has saved me with these doctors appointments as I've been able to work them around it without anyone noticing 😅

Also I'm still hoping this will be your month and you won't have to go for the lap 🤞 😃

Thank you ladies, I really appreciate your input! I'll go with the gynae testing in that case and @2020mission you're right about me not needing a note so I should be okay.

@MIW01 you're so right about employment protection - def not saying a peep after that reminder 😅

Happy Easter everyone! My Easter present has been my maid of honour telling me she can no longer come to my wedding! I haven't responded as I really don't know what to say. The reason is that that is the day they are scattering her grandads ashes, he died last year. How would you ladies respond in my position???

@Motherofkittens28 gosh that's tricky! I don't think there's much you can say tbh! I'd be pretty disappointed though as with him dying last year surely this isn't a date set in stone and she could have asked them to move it?? I'm afraid that's not something you could ask...

@Juno231 she says she asked her family to change the date and they said no. I'm very hurt, in a kind of numb way. It is what it is I guess but I dont see how our friendship can ever be the same.

@motherofkittens28 wtf!!! If he died just before the wedding and the funeral was your wedding I would 100% understand. But this seems a bit ridiculous! Your MoH as well.

Sorry but thats ridiculous! My mum died when I was young and If her ashes scattering was on the day of friends wedding.....I would have rearranged the ashes scattering?? Or if my grandparents ashes scattering was on that day I would go to the wedding because they have already had a funeral and they would want me to have fun.

Omg i am irrationally angry about your friends choices haha!

@miw01 I might speak to the fertility doctor about it but I am sure there response as usual will be "nothing to be concerned abput"

@narwhal88 totally better to test on the weekend so that if its negative you get change to grieve and if its positive you can smile all day without looking weird in work haha! Are you having normal tww symptoms? Up untill 13dpo so 7dp5dt for you, I felt totally normal apart from being slightly run down. And a bit hot. And even after that it was only slight sore boobs and nosebleeds

@motherofkittens28 in terms of how I would response it would be a swift "if that's your choice then okay"

And then hold a grudge for life (my worst trait haha)

@Motherofkittens28 I agree with @Annny27 🤣
But no, your friendship won't ever be the same again.

In my mind scattering ashes isn't really that significant? Certainly not an indirect family member, so I'd choose to go to the wedding. My family would understand. My dad's ashes were buried but my own brother didn't even come to that! He was working and really didn't want to either. I did think about not doing but in the end I went. Everyone deals with things differently. But your friends family are being unreasonable and they should have checked for key dates before arranging it. Especially when it could have been any time!

@Yutes when will you find out about Letrozole? Is it 21day bloods? I had 3 months worth and last cycle had bloods and showed low progesterone still hence why they moved me onto Clomid.

@Juno231 I'm self employed so can't really comment but I've heard people say to their bosses but I think it'd totally depend on your relationship with them and your job.

WTF @Motherofkittens28 that's awful! Like everyone's said, you can understand if it was something recent but if he died a year ago then no way, she should be going to your wedding!

@Narwhal88 hope you're hanging in there and keeping yourself occupied

@Motherofkittens28 I'm with the others I'd be a bit on the fuming side if that were me! I'm sure they could rearrange unless it was a significant date for them for Some Reason?

@Narwhal88 have everything crossed for you here 🤞🏻 hope you're keeping busy!

Thanks for all the feedback guys. My wedding day is what would have been her grandads 102 birthday had he not died in March 2020. Apparently they want to scatter his ashes on his birthday, not sure why they didn't do that in 2020. To be honest I think the writing is on the wall, our relationship has been difficult since I told her our wedding date as she said at the time that it was her grandads birthday and she probably wouldn't come. She asked me to change the date, which i refused to do as we are getting married on our anniversary, so it's an important date to us. I was very very upset about this at the time but I've never confronted her about it. We will carry on and hopefully have a wonderful wedding, I just really didnt need this.

[quote kerrym87]**@Juno231* just said it was gynae investigation and treatment, I think if we need more intervention I'll tell my manager as off duty worked out like 6 weeks in advance. @Narwhal88 fingers crossed for you @Yutes* are you in the pcos camp for letrozole or something else? X[/quote]
Yutes are you in the pcos camp for letrozole or something else?
@kerrym87
Yes. It’s my clinics first line of treatment for PCOS assisted conception

Hey all! Just checking in. Been a bit quiet as have had two lots of devastating news to deal with these last couple of weeks (not fertility related).
It's just been awful and my stress levels are sky high.
Had my date through for internal scans etc for May which is good. Definitely a lot quicker than I expected.
Not hopeful this month as only dtd once (!!) due to a busy set of shifts and overtime.
Hopefully you've all had a nice Easter and managed to enjoy some time with loved ones in gardens ☺️

@Motherofkittens28 I'm so sorry, that's really shit! That's tough to come bk from. I'd be pretty devastated at my MOH! I can see the family's reasoning for wanting it that date but surely they can see how much more significant a wedding is over a an ash scattering. 🤯 what a shame for you. What've you said bk to her?

@Theawkwardblonde hey, sorry to hear you've been having a stressful time, hope things sort themselves out! Great news your appointment is next month tho, that's great! We go in tomorrow afternoon for our first appointment since the fundings been approved so I hope it's to sort protocols and drugs for ivf! Had a lovely Easter in the in-laws garden yesterday. Hope you managed to enjoy the day despite the stressful time you're going through? ♥️

@Motherofkittens28 that makes more sense, as to why its that day now. I'm afraid weddings show who your true friends are though. And if you only have an issue with 1, then you've got off lightly! 🤣 Never again is all I'll say!

@Theawkwardblonde so sorry to hear you have been having such a tough time. Hopefully things will start to look up soon. I'll keep my fingers crossed for you!

@notyetamumbuttrying I've replied this morning and just said OK, thanks for letting me know. Seems pointless to tell her how I really feel about it. The problem I'm left with now is that I have hair and makeup etc booked and it's non refundable as they had a minimum spend. Really I need to ask someone else to replace her, but in order not to upset people I'd have to ask two extra people which puts the cost up. It's a mess!

@paintfairy you are so right! It's really clarified some things for me!

Hey everyone 👋
So this is my 2nd month on vitex and oh my word well I've never been one to see any ewcm and right now I've lots 🙈 also had a little skin tag down there which has now disappeared starting to think after 2and a half years of ttc maybe it's been hormone imbalance what's your thoughts x

[quote Crazydoglady123]@Yutes when will you find out about Letrozole? Is it 21day bloods? I had 3 months worth and last cycle had bloods and showed low progesterone still hence why they moved me onto Clomid.

@Juno231 I'm self employed so can't really comment but I've heard people say to their bosses but I think it'd totally depend on your relationship with them and your job.

WTF @Motherofkittens28 that's awful! Like everyone's said, you can understand if it was something recent but if he died a year ago then no way, she should be going to your wedding!

@Narwhal88 hope you're hanging in there and keeping yourself occupied [/quote]
@Crazydoglady123 yeah I’ll get 21 day bloods.
I track bbt as well. I am suspicious that I may not respond to letrozole but so far so good. I’m not at maximum letrozole yet, so we’ll see. Still feeling hopeful and that’s more than I can say I’ve felt for the last 2 months.

@Motherofkittens28 has she just left it now or said anymore since you messaged her?

@Theawkwardblonde hope you're feeling a bit better now and yay to your scan in May!

@Yutes that's good! My consultant had me on a high dose on one day of my cycle...I had to take 8 x 2.5mg tablets on CD3. Fingers crossed it's working for you! What cycle day are you now?

@Sjhigs sounds like it's helping!

@notyetamumbuttrying good luck for your appointment today!

@Crazydoglady123 thanks lovely. It's at 230pm so just the morning to work and then we can get on our way! How's things with you?
@Sjhigs could well have been! Best of luck for this cycle 🤞🏾
@Motherofkittens28 gosh what a stress! Did she reply?

@notyetamumbuttrying @Crazydoglady123 she did, she said I must know that she'd rather be at my wedding than at a funeral. I just said "I'm sure" but really I was thinking a) its not a funeral and b) if you'd rather be at my wedding you would be coming to my wedding!
@crazydoglady123 how's the buserelin going?
@notyetamumbuttrying good luck with the appointment today!

@notyetamumbuttrying everything crossed things get moving quick for you!

@Motherofkittens28 exactly, it's not a funeral! My family and my grandad would be understanding if I was in that situation!
The injections are easy...too easy that I actually enjoy doing them 😂 however my abdomen feels really sore the last few days. Like I've either been punched in it or done like 100 sit ups. I don't know if it's cyst related, buserelin side effect related or maybe bruising. Did you have anything like it? It's a week today till my next scan so bloody praying the cysts have done one and I'm allowed to start stims! xxx