TTC baby no1. Looking for fellow crazy TTC friends!

[CAG14]

Hey

This is my 9th month TTC my first baby and I'm 33. I got static smiley on Friday on OPK, and now I'm in my TWW - again! I'm currently on furlough so the wait seems even longer and more painful and I definitely end up going a bit crazy 🤪

Anyone else in similar boat and need keeping sane?! Also any TTC tips you've heard of? I will literally try anything at the moment haha.

@CAG14

Morning ladies. BFN on FRER this morning and I'm 11DPO so that's me out. Feeling pretty deflated and miserable and obviously all the usual thoughts of is something wrong with me. My family are coming to stay this weekend (haven't seen them since January) so it would have been nice to tell them good news but instead I'm just going to have to drink all the wine I bought with them

You not out until AF comes! You never know xx

Hi @CAG14 really sorry to hear that :-( although you aren’t out till AF arrives and 11dpo can still be too early to test depending on when you could have implanted? You should have yourself what I liked to call a ‘little pity party’ and then focus on the next cycle - if you do SMEP then the fun times resume on day 8 of your next a cycle which hopefully won’t seem like too far away! And enjoy seeing your family - that must be so nice after not seeing them for so long, and will hopefully make you feel better? 💕

@CAG14 sorry to hear that but like the others are saying AF may still not arrive!

@Pippy20 @Jadeb1995 @Crayon7 thank you ladies. It could still happen but I'm not confident at all. I'll leave it a couple of days and if AF still hasn't arrived by Thursday I'll test again. But I'm in full "pity party" mode here lol.

@CAG14 sorry about your BFN. It's the worst feeling isnt it 😔 we try our best to hold off testing too early and then finally decide to. I always have that little pang of excitement and nerves once I have POAS and then within seconds that feeling is shattered. Like everyone is saying though it could still be too early and until AF arrives you aren't out. Also great you are seeing family after so long and hopefully that will be a nice distraction for you.

@Jadeb1995 I do the CB opks first thing in morning as they specifically recommend that whereas the IC advise you not to do that. I tend to still do a IC alongside the CB in morning though as I think I may as well when they are so cheap. Once the line is getting darker I often do another later afternoon and also sometimes an evening one. I like to do the intelligent recognition on the app and gives me a weird satisfaction to see the % reading creep up and follow the same pattern. After months and months of convincing myself something is wrong and that we will never conceive for some reason this is something that reassures and calms me to see/track.

Anyone who has sadly had experience with MC or CP did you find it took long for your cycle to come back regularly? AF was 6 days late for me this month and a few things have felt very different to any other of my 15 months of TTC (really bad cramping and clot like heavy AF). I am not sure if it was a CP or just a random different month.

Thanks guys
@Mia1985x I had a MMC last month and my period returned as normal xx

@Mia1985x mine came back after mc but very irregular for me ranging from 30-42 days just to add insult to injury!

@Jadeb1995 I always used cb opks first thing in the morning and only once a day and never missed the static Smiley surge face. I did try and use the ic ones in the afternoons as well once I got the flashing smiley but they never seemed to give a clear result so I ditched them and just stuck with cb using FMU - I had read that some people worry they might miss the surge of it happens later on in the day and the box says you can test twice a day once you get the flashing face but I think they just do that so you buy more bloody sticks! It’s like peeing on £28 of cash a month! 😂 Benefit outweighed the cost for me however as I’m very impatient and seeing a face/no face made it easy for me as I didn’t have to worry about trying to interpret the lines on the cheap ones. Eat, sleep, pee on a stick, repeat 😂

@CAG14 sorry 😔 it's so so shit. But I stand by this niggling pet peeve about mumsnet that despite all the threads you see about frer and 11DPO, it's really not that common to get a BFP this early. Just because they can detect pregnancy up to 6 days before a missed period doesn't mean they will. I can't remember if it's in the box or on the first response website but somewhere actually gives you percentage stats of how accurate it is on getting a correct reading. Some women only produce the lowest amount of hcg possible and that wouldn't detect it until a missed period so please please don't get too disheartened, this is why I'm always adamant it's not over until AF is officially here! My sister didn't get a positive test until she was 8 weeks and that was only through a blood test!

@Mia1985x my first cycle after my miscarriage was normal but now it's messy. Though I'm fairly certain it's the supplements rather than what happened

Looking for advice on what you'd do in this situation.. One of my jobs is in a high school and today my supervisor had me unloading a van full of boxes of books and stationary into the assembly hall.. Then lifting art supplies up 6 flights of stairs to the art room. She's well aware I'm TTC and that I had a miscarriage as I had to take a few days off when it happened. I'm in my TWW so I feel like lifting heavy things right now is the worst time to be doing it. I know my cycle is messy right now but I ovulated so I'm still in for a chance I guess.. I know I can't expect to not do any work and it's super early to be panicking about lifting but would yous say something about it or just get on with it? Sorry if I sound pretentious but I don't want to risk anything after waiting so long and going through the MMC 😕

I just use the cheap Femometer opks so o be I get a high I do them 3-4 times a day. I tend to stay at peak for most of a day tho so don’t think I would miss it by doing less.
Had the fun of first time needing to check opk in work today. That was fun 🤦🏻‍♀️😂😂

Typically got peak opk this morning in time with oh leaving for work for 2 days as predicted. Managed to dtd last night so hopefully that’s enough. I’ll try for tomorrow/Thursday but I predict he’ll be too tired after all the driving etc.

@Stabal ngl I’d say something if it was me. 6 flights of stairs with heavy stuff? Nope sorry not me lol. Especially after having a MC and you’re still TTC she should at least be more aware of your needs and more supportive in that sense but I dunno. If it was me I would’ve said something. Pregnant or not. I’m sure there could’ve been someone else to do it. I’ve read some things can interfere with the implantation process as it can cause uterine contractions like working out etc. If you’re lifting heavy I’m sure it’s kinda the same.

I have two digital clear blue sticks as when I ran out of testing sticks I couldn’t find any on their own so I had to get the full kit again. I got static smiley on ov day but I wasn’t able to test the day before so I didn’t know if it was flashing or peak the day before my static so I used my other digital the next day and it was blank non fertile at all so it was over pretty quick for me lol. Also used the cheap femometer ones, darkest line I ever got with the same urine for my static smiley. 7 hours later line was much lighter. Dtd day before ov this month with conceive plus, currently 7dpo now. Partners birthday this weekend, really want cocktails, but what if I caught? I don’t think I have but I WANT cocktails!!😂😭

@Leobaby this is where I’m bad. I still had a few drinks last 2ww. I read that even if you caught, the embryo isn’t connected/getting nutrition from you at that point. That being said, I didn’t have any more than an occasional glass of wine just in case it had any effect on implantation. Who knows 🤷🏻‍♀️

@LT103 I think you're covered, the best days to DTD are just before ovulation so I wouldn't panic! 😊

@Leobaby yeah you're right. I might actually speak to someone above her so they're aware. As for having a drink, go ahead! As long as you don't go absolutely crazy you'll be fine. I know loads of people won't drink during this time but to be honest my work at my 2nd job was dwindling early March with covid and I had wine a few nights the week I conceived so it obviously didn't impact implantation

@Stabal yeah that's a good idea to speak to someone above her. I would def say something if your not comfortable doing it. Like @Leobaby said more than likely someone else who could pick that up.

Thanks @Jadeb1995 @Pippy20 @Stabal that's good to know. Sorry you all have experience of this though 😔 I have also been reading that alot of people find they fall pregnant again very quickly after CP & MC and there are articles that suggest you are very fertile at this time.

How are you feeling now @Pippy20 any more symptoms? Have you told anyone yet?

@Stabal @LT103 ah okay thanks girls. I don’t like getting drunk anyway it’s not my thing, but I won’t say no to cocktails lol. Will have a couple then 🥰 but yeah deffo say something just so they are aware and can give you lighter work.

@Mia1985x honestly I spend 95% of every day worrying which is very draining. I really want to be happy and excited but I’m finding it near impossible as I keep thinking don’t get ahead of yourself it could all easily go wrong again. I had my first appointment over the phone with the midwife yesterday and she’s sent me some mindfulness stuff to listen to at night as I’m not sleeping very well. She’s very matter of fact and was like of course you feel like this you’ve been burned once and your brain is trying to protect you incase it happens again. Agh! I’m going to get a private scan at 8 weeks for a bit of reassurance - or if it’s bad news at least I’ll find out sooner rather than later. We’ve told my in laws as went to see them at the weekend and I was feeling like ten types of shite. They are the only people we are going to tell until we (hopefully!!!) get past 12 weeks. They both have medical backgrounds so I feel somewhat less anxious knowing they know and I can talk to them about stuff if needed.

Sadly the mc has really taken the innocence out of everything for me. I still can’t get my head round the idea that this might actually result in a baby!

Other than all the obsessing etc I’m feeling quite sick and extremely tired which I am taking to be good signs and long may they continue 😂

Also do any of you have a Fitbit/similar and track resting heart rate? It’s similar to temping but waaaaaay easier. It can be a good way of seeing if you’ll get a BFP - mine usually follows a pretty normal pattern, but both times I’ve got pregnant it’s kept creeping up where normally it would take a dip before AF arrived. I didn’t realise this was a thing until recently - one more thing to obsess over but it was a good indicator for me! I’ve attached what my normal heart rate looks like - around 68 and then the chart for this month so far which as you can see went a bit bonkers!

[quote Mia1985x]@CAG14 sorry about your BFN. It's the worst feeling isnt it 😔 we try our best to hold off testing too early and then finally decide to. I always have that little pang of excitement and nerves once I have POAS and then within seconds that feeling is shattered. Like everyone is saying though it could still be too early and until AF arrives you aren't out. Also great you are seeing family after so long and hopefully that will be a nice distraction for you.

@Jadeb1995 I do the CB opks first thing in morning as they specifically recommend that whereas the IC advise you not to do that. I tend to still do a IC alongside the CB in morning though as I think I may as well when they are so cheap. Once the line is getting darker I often do another later afternoon and also sometimes an evening one. I like to do the intelligent recognition on the app and gives me a weird satisfaction to see the % reading creep up and follow the same pattern. After months and months of convincing myself something is wrong and that we will never conceive for some reason this is something that reassures and calms me to see/track.

Anyone who has sadly had experience with MC or CP did you find it took long for your cycle to come back regularly? AF was 6 days late for me this month and a few things have felt very different to any other of my 15 months of TTC (really bad cramping and clot like heavy AF). I am not sure if it was a CP or just a random different month.[/quote]
I had two chemicals and was just few days late.

Realistically would have saved myself a lot of heartache if I didn't test early.

Advise needed!!!
My friend that I was talking about yesterday has just asked when we're going to start trying!!!
I really want to tell her but OH won't be happy if I do

@butterfly5291 that’s a hard one! Personally I didn’t tell anyone as for me I felt like it would just add to the pressure if people knew as they’d always be wondering and asking. That being said it’s nice to talk to people, especially if she’s a close friend! Is it just an out of the blue question or does it come up often?

@Pippy20 I didn’t find mine that accurate. Mine dropped a week before af then started coming up during af? I’m tracking bbt which seems more accurate for me 🤷🏻‍♀️

@Pippy20 we've been friends for over 20 years...so really close. She's on mat leave at the moment and we were talking about mat pay...so not out of the blue but not come up before. I would think she'd assume we'd wait till after our wedding in Dec.
It wouldn't put any more pressure on me to have her know we are trying.... I can do that to myself regardless lol

@butterfly5291 I haven’t told anyone as I didn’t want them asking and knowing if it took ages but I really miss being able to speak to anyone about it. I have lots of friends who already have children and I guess it would be nice to have people to talk to about it.

Hey 🙋🏼‍♀️

Hope you don't mind me joining. TTC baby number 1 after COVID cancelled our wedding. Decided we didn't want to wait anymore.

Currently cycle 1 in the TTW with AF due in 3 days and tbh.. I think I can feel it coming 😫

Didn't do anything in terms of ovulation tests or anything other than unprotected sex this cycle so definitely want to step up and be prepared for the next.

Any advice welcome!