TTC after miscarriage - January 2020

[MilsCookie]

Hello all (and late Merry Christmas!)

Looking for TTC buddies in a similar situation! 👋

In September I accidentally became pregnant. We had planned to begin TTC in Jan 2020 anyway, so we were really excited. Sadly, at my 12 week scan on 25th Nov, I found out I had had a missed miscarriage and the baby had stopped growing at about 9 weeks. The week that followed was one of the most traumatic in my life, having failed medical management and then an ERPC. All this happened whilst I was in another country.

Since then my recovery has been okay but all I can think about is wanting to be pregnant again and have been hoping and praying that my period returns soon so that we can officially start trying.

This morning I have had brown discharge and cramping, so it does feel like AF is on the way. So I guess I am going to count today as CD1 of my first official TTC cycle?

I wondered if anyone had been through anything similar and if so I am so sorry for your loss and what you had to go through. It really is a horrendous time. 💐

Anyone want to join me? 💕

@Anny27 I've never used an OPK before , where do you get them from and how do you use them? I will try that method xxx

Thank you @ChampooPapi ❤ yes I was quite poorly for a few weeks and its SOO nice to not be faint or sick anymore. It's like a new burst of energy. I think that's why I am favouring threads with women whonhave been through losses as they understand a little bit more! How long did it take you to conceive with your other children?

@AlviesMam OPKs are ovulation predictor tests and they are just like cheap pregnancy tests, dip them in your wee on the run up to ovulation and it will tell you when your LH surge is (which means you are about to ovulate. I got a load from amazon, really cheap ones. Think they are called "one step ovulation strips" :)

@Anny27 ah ok! I'll take a look! - so does it come up positive before ovulation? Xx

I'm sorry you've all had such a rough ride. Miscarriage at nine and a bit weeks back in March. Cycles doing my head in - recent ones 30, 28 and 34 days. Currently CD37 but negative test and no period. It's infuriating.

People keep saying "don't put too much pressure on yourself" and "it'll happen when you least expect it". Tracking cycles and getting your hopes crushed every month is hardly relaxing is it?!

@sophied1983 so frustrating for you! I'm normally every 28 days. Was 27 this cycle. Never been later than 29. It's hard to relax when your desperate for a baby. I want to go into the new year happy but it's scaring me wondering what journey is going to be on xxx

Hi all please can I join. I had a miscarriage on 5 November and still waiting for my first period after the mc. I’m so frustrated!! Hoping 2020 will be the year for a rainbow!

@MrsB16 sorry to here this. I hope your cycle returns soon so you can start trying again xxxx

👋 Hello @GemLou88, @AlviesMam, @ChampooPapi and @sophied1983 - really great to see you here and looking forward to being able to support you all throughout our TTC journeys, but I’m also sad that you find yourself in this particular thread following your losses. @AlviesMam I can’t even imagine what you have gone through. Really hope you’ve been able to get the support you need and haven’t been too hard on yourself. ❤️ I love the name Alvie too.

@ChampooPapi - I also found out at the 12 week scan. Just horrendous isn’t it thinking you’re going to see your little baby for the first time and you’re told there’s no heartbeat. I could see the shape of my baby but instantly knew it didn’t look right and it was just completely still. Was this your first mc? If so I can imagine it was even more of a shock after having two healthy DDs. Glad to hear you’re doing ok and hopefully we can all support each other here 😘

@sophied1983 it’s so frustrating isn’t it. Relaxing is easier said than done! How long have you been TTC for?

@Anny27 so after having on and off brown/pink dc yesterday, last night I had really bad cramps and today AF has come on in force!! Bright red and much heavier than I usually am. Was actually shocked when I looked in the toilet 😳 but as it’s the first one since the mc I’m expecting it to be like this really. So I suppose today is CD2 for me! I think a few of us are on the same cycle day (give or take a few days?) so we can be in our TWWs together!

@GemLou88 really hope your period arrives (or BFP!) soon so you can start to move on. The waiting makes everything so hard but at least we’re all in it together.

I’m with @Anny27 in that I find it easier to talk in threads where people have been through something similar! 💕

Argh why does it make the entire thread go bold?!

Welcome @MrsB16 💕 really sorry for your loss and hoping to be able to support you through your TTC journey. We’re all in this together! I find talking to people in the same boat really helps, so I hope we can help you too 😊

2020 will be OUR year! 🌈 xxx

@MilsCookie - m/c in March, so since then. Feel like this whole year has been taken up with pregnancy and m/c - tainted it really :(

@sophied1983 ahh that sounds really frustrating. Are you tracking ovulation? Were you ttc for a long before you got pregnant the first time? I am only at the beginning of my TTC journey but know that it’s unlikely to happen straight away!

Hi everyone! 👋🏻

Joining in as I had a miscarriage two weeks ago tomorrow, at 5+3. I still need to take a pregnancy test tomorrow to check it’s negative, but I’m confident it will be. My last pregnancy ‘sign’ disappeared earlier this week (the weird taste in my mouth - it was my earliest to arrive and last to leave) and tonight I’m starting to see signs that ovulation might happen soon! 😊

I’m desperate to get pregnant again ASAP, and really really hoping it’ll happen before I even get a period after the miscarriage - although I am fully prepared for that not happening!

Fingers crossed for us all in 2020 🌈

@MilsCookie - sometimes I use OPKs... but I find they can make me feel worse at times. Places even more 'pressure' on if you know what I mean?! Shortest cycle has been 28 days and longest over 40.

With our daughter it took 7 months, with m/c it was 4 months. So this is the longest :(

Hey @TerribleImagination ! Sorry to hear of your loss. I also had the weird taste in my mouth symptom - it was so obvious down the sides of my tongue!

Fingers crossed you get pregnant before you have another period! Let us know how you get on! 🌈💫 xxx

@sophied1983 I think I would stress too much if I used OPKs but have felt really tempted to get some! On one hand it would make me feel like I was being proactive in trying to get pregnant but on the other hand I think it would make me more anxious! You’ve gotta do what feels right for you though.

7 and 4 months are not long in the grand scheme of things but I can imagine how frustrating it is. Baby dust to you and hoping it happens quickly for you this time round! 💫 xxx

Already on 9 months this time and period arrived today, so that's another month gone. Think if I had regular cycles I'd find it a bit easier, but it's the fact they jump about which drives me potty. Going to make an appointment with the doctor in the New Year. My periods have totally changed since the m/c and that's unsettling too.

Thanks @MilsCookie 😊

I got my negative pregnancy test this morning... felt sad but I wasn’t surprised and at least it’s starting fresh now. As miscarriages go, I’ve been fortunate not to need any medical management at all.

So now to DTD lots again whilst full of Christmas dinners and chocolate 😂

Hi gals, you all sound like you are writing my story and it’s so comforting to know I’m not on my own. I had my MMC in October and had my AF six weeks later. I was so relieved to know my body was getting back to normal. I’ve been using ovulation sticks since then, I had never used them on the previous pregnancy, and got a surge a week ago. AF is due New Year’s Day or so, and I think I’ll wait till then to test. But as @ChampooPapi said, 2020 is going to be our year gals!!

Hello all

Thank you for setting up the thread @milscookie. There are some incredibly strong women on here, with some heart breaking experiences. I'm so sorry for all of losses and really hope you are finding ways to heal 😙
I had a miscarriage in September early at 6 weeks and we've been TTC for 11 months now for our first baby. I'm 35 and partner is 38. I think like others I had convinced myself that we'd get pregnant again really quickly after the MC but it's not happened and every time af comes it's really upsetting and frustrating as feel we are putting a lot of work in; clear blue OPK's, bbt chatting (new addition this month, so not really sure about this yet), and SMEP (conceived by this method previously).

Anyway I think I've been so consumed in my own grief and frustrations that i'd not recognised until recently how difficult this is for my partner too. Whereas us women will talk about it, I don't think that they always do.

I'm a bit later on in my cycle, currently CD20 and 3dpo. Feeling really positive about 2020 for us all, and ready to leave this crappy year behind now x

@AlviesMam yep you get a positive test about 24-48 hours before you ovulate :) they are a bit different to pregnancy tests in that both lines need to be the same darkness for it to be classed as positive.

@sophied1983 sorry your cycles are so irregular now :( it's hard when you just want to be back on track! My first cycle after misgarruaged was 43ish days but hoping that they return back to the 28 day mark

@MilsCookie we are on the same cycle day then! My AF was a bit lighter this month and not as much cramps. Doctor said can either be light or heavier, it's such a minefield haha

Welcome to all the other ladies @TerribleImagination @Brodijen @honolulu1 @MrsB16 ❤

@Anny27 what makes the ovulation tests positive before an egg is released? How does it know? (Sorry for the questions just want to know how accurate they are)
Thank you xxx

No worries @AlviesMam :) you get an LH surge (the hormone that's released before an egg releases) which is picked up on the ovulation test so the test let's you know that your body is gearing up to ovulate xx

Hi ladies,

I’d love to join you if that’s ok. I had a missed miscarriage back in August and it’s taken me until now to tentatively choose to try again. I had surgical management which was straightforward but very sad. I felt from the start that something wasn’t right but I get HG in pregnancy and was super ill so I thought I’d be ok. Cruelly, I continued to be bed bound despite the baby having stopped growing at 6 weeks. I had had an early scan saw a heartbeat measuring 6 weeks and I was sceptical because I had thought I was about 8 weeks. I had a private scan 2 weeks later and there was nothing there

I’ve had a very difficult history with pregnancy and settled on the idea that maybe I should stop trying. I lost my first daughter at 31 weeks with no eventual cause found. A year later I successfully delivered my son. It was a very traumatic pregnancy, I was constantly worried he would die too but we made it.

According to the opks I am ovulating right now. I’m a little in denial about the whole thing and I’m not sure how I’ll feel if I do fall pregnant again. Terrified I imagine. I want a sibling for my son but equally if this is not the path for me then I feel quietly accepting of that. I’ve been blessed with him and if it doesn’t happen for me then I hope I can find peace with that. Im 39 so it feels like the last
Chance.

Good luck to you all xx

Would like to join...

Fell pregnant in August and that ended in a MMC and ERPC on 1st October... Just got a Bfp on boxing day, but the faintest line and not getting any darker, so can only assume a chemical now :(
Just waiting for AF to arrive and get on with trying again xx

Hello,

I’ve been trying to conceive baby number two since September 2018. My husband and I got a BFP in March 2019 but miscarried at 11 weeks in May 2019. We got another BFP in September 2019 but found out it was ectopic and had baby, and my left Fallopian tube removed in October 2019.

We took a break for a couple of months but have decided to start trying again this cycle. I’m currently on cycle day 4 and I’m trying to be positive!

Fingers crossed for everyone else who is trying this month!