10+ months TTC

[Kookie88]

I've just reached cycle 10 and I'm despairing. I've tried to stay focused and positive all this time but it's all gotten a bit much. Each month I've tried something new but nothing seems to be working. (This month is acupuncture month, last month was fertilitea month)!

I guess I just needed to vent I don't want to sound like a total debbie downer but today's been tough!

bugs tracking ovulation and trying to get test 7 days after is what I had to do as I fluffed the timing two months in a row. I did find I could get bloods done in local hospital drop in without an appointment which made it a bit easier

catherine the waiting sucks. The waiting on appointments feels interminable! The waiting and now knowing how long we will be waiting. I think it has gotten us all pretty low at some point and I do think it’s because ttc can become very consuming. A lot of the reason I chose to do my masters now was to occupy my mind and make me feel less like I was on hold. If you find it starts to get you down a lot, I would really recommend some counselling sessions to help cope. Just helps deal with all the feelings of disappointment, unfairness, anger and hopelessness.

So sorry the hycosy was rough - I don’t know if I said but the period after it can be a bit funky too, lots of old blood in my experience and more painful. Really wish the consult was sooner that feels like ages I am sure! Xxx

Well ladies af arrived two days early for me. I didn’t have high hopes for this month as DH was away but still rubbish. It was our last cycle trying before picking up investigations again. We’re taking next month off so we can relax over Xmas (and we’re staying with family so ttc is super awkward!). Feeling strangely positive but I think it’s because I’ve accepted it isn’t going to happen easily and now we can start to (hopefully) find out why and get a solution. Bugs I’m feeling the same as you with what’s another month. Hopefully 2018 will be a positive year for us all.

Has anyone here changed drs part way through investigations? I had swabs and an internal u/s with my old gynae but we’ve since moved. I’m wondering whether they’ll repeat them?

catherine I expect a hsg or hycosy will be one of the next tests for us and I’m dreading it. I’m sorry to hear you have had a hard time with it. I hope you’re on the road to recovery now.

betseyboo87 I think I was super unlucky with my hycosy I think the vast majority find it ok. I just remember the doctor saying "just like period pains" and I was like "not like any I have ever had".

Had a big chat with husband and about how hard we find trying and that hycosy experience. We will try for another 6 months to the 2 year point and then stop. At this point every test has come back normal. If there is something fixable we will go for it and if ivf is offered we can make a decision at the point.

Hey all, how are we all doing?

Betsey - sorry to hear about AF, hope you enjoy the break over Christmas. It does help which seems odd I know!!

Catherine - I think putting a time limit on things is really helpful so good for you. I can only speak for my own experience, but it helped me - just know It may get emotional if you get to that date as I think we all secretly hope it will happen naturally and we won’t need the Ivf - but ultimately it lets you move forward and that’s what we all need in this! Xxx

AFM, I’m on O day so TWW starts tomorrow. Can’t help feeling more hope this cycle but trying not to build it up.... impossible! I guess that ladies on here on clomid must feel this way as you have a good reason to expect + results! Ah the rollercoaster of emotion that is TTC

In 2ww. Probably test a couple of days before Christmas if no AF by then. I am glad 2ww will be over at that point - it will be nice to know if I can drink etc.

Betsy, I think you can ask for sedation (diazepam I think) during procedures if you're feeling v anxious about it. Might be worth asking about if you think it might help you.

Sorry catherine, I can't remember if you said but have you had karyotypes done?

Weirdly enough our appointment date is finally already here. This will be the last AF before the meeting date and I should be bang on around CD1 of the next when we get seen. How mad is that? Been waiting all this time. I really really hope it turns out to be useful. It would be gutting if we've waited for nothing.

Good luck for your appointment, @BertieBotts, although fx you won't need it!

@ColaBottles64, it's good to feel hopeful! I've got my fx for you.

Due af any day now, 0.2 bbt dip yesterday and a little very pale pink bit temp back up 0.1 today. No actual cramps as yet. Yesterday would have been our 12-week scan so feeling fragile.

Oh we would still go even if I'm pregnant now, because we'll potentially need extra testing etc. Have to see what they say basically.

sooz all those milestones and reminders are hard, I’m so sorry. Cycle sounds like it’s settling again which is good too? Interesting on the temp, I’ve just started temping and I seem to have a swing of 0.2 between most days, do you find you’re much more consistent?

I had some spotting yesterday which was ovulation day. I’ve never spotted on ov day before as far as I can remember so that was new! I’m taking all these things as signs the laps had some positive effect, without any basis other than optimism!

On the annoying side, 1 of my cuts hadn’t healed up yet so I’m on some antibiotics now and may need to get a stitch as it’s not sealing. The other two cuts are healed so perfectly, the problem one is on the side that got the most action and was most bruised post lap. Hope to goodness it sorts itself out as it’s been over 3 weeks.

Bertie I wonder will the geneticist order more tests. Have you had sperm dna frag test done for DH?

Xxx

Well I have a little bit of Christmas magic to share. BFP this morning. I was shaking. I can't believe it, even though I've "known" (felt v pregnant) for days now. It's really strong, stronger than any BFP I've had before so maybe that is a good sign? Who knows.

Oh my goodness bertie congratulations!! That’s fantastic news and I’m absolutely thrilled for you. A Christmas Miracle indeed

BertieBotts I am so pleased for you, congratulations fingers and toes crossed. Bit of Christmas magic for you.

I havent had the kayotypes test. I haven't even been referred to fertility services. My gyn appointment to refer to fertility services was in feb but has been cancelled and is now in march. We have been trying for 18 months now. How long did people wait from the gyn referral till they got to see actual infertility doctors?

Colabottles64 It has helped setting an end point but i have been signed off sick for a month. I'm still have minor bleeding and cramping 3 weeks post hycosy. Decided i am going to sit at home until it stops but I actually feel better in myself.

Aww congratulations Bertie! Wonderful news before Christmas, fingers crossed it works out well for you and hoping Santa brings some more BFPs on his sleigh too!

Thank you everyone! I told DH when he got home from work - wrapped up the test in a little box like a Christmas present! :) I thought he had twigged actually but he was really surprised.

Well we're in Germany so not quite the same but I went when we'd been trying for about 15 months and they refused to see me (until it had been 14 months since the last pregnancy - which I think is a bit ridiculous) however they referred DH for sperm tests and us both to the fertility specialist when I explained his history to them, that was in July, and there was a 6 month waiting list at the fertility specialist (I don't think this is the case in the UK, FWIW) so we have our appointment there in January. We'll still go because I want them to redo the karyotype on DH and ask them questions about any extra testing etc they recommend during pregnancy or anything they can tell us to look out for.

So about the karyotype - the reason that I asked is that I know in some areas of the UK it's not a standard infertility/RMC test any more, but IMO this is a bit unfair because it can explain problems when they would otherwise sign you off as unexplained. Basically it can show up inversions or translocations which can cause embryos to be created with too much or too little genetic material, which usually causes miscarriage but can sometimes cause failure to implant or in rare cases birth defects and disabilities. It's one of the rare causes of miscarriage from the male side. So if you get to the limit of NHS testing and they are ready to pass you off as unexplained, it's one which might be worth paying for privately or at least badgering them for! Someone with a translocation or inversion doesn't normally show any symptoms themselves and is completely healthy apart from having problems conceiving.

I don't think DNA fragmentation is the same thing, but I'll see what they suggest when we go to see them.

Wow Bertie that’s fantastic, I’m so pleased for you! Just dropped by for a quick look and saw BFP and had to add my congrats!

Merry Christmas one and all, I hope it’s a BFP one, but if it isn’t then I hope it involves some merriment and treats! I shall be quaffing champagne for the hell of it while I can (IVF starting approx Feb) and wishing you all health and happiness and all good things x

Congratulations bertie amazing news xx

Bertie - bet your other half is chuffed to bits.

Thanks for the info I have no idea what will be next

Congrats Bertie!

Ladies, I’ve had my suspicions but dared not to hope until I got a lovely clear bfp on a frer this morning at 10dpo!!! Ugly crying instantly followed, scaring my DH quite a bit who woke up to an incoherent bawling wife waving a Positive pregnancy test at him! After this long two years I just honestly can’t believe it, haven’t been able to put down the test. A Christmas fricking miracle!!!!!!!!

colabottle64 congratulations! The perfect Christmas present

OMG Cola that’s blimmin wonderful! Soooooooo excited for you! Happy Christmas! X

Aww cola congratulations! That’s a wonderful Christmas present for you!

Hope everyone has a great Christmas and lots of luck for answers and bfps next year! XXX

Thanks so much everyone, I keep bursting into tears!! Love and hope to you all for more bfp’s very very soon xxx

@Colabottles64, that is great news, congrats!

Yay and congrats Cola!

What a lovely positive end to the thread. Merry Christmas all.