35+ TTC #1

[elisev]

Hi all,

Just wanted to start a thread for all of us over 35 just starting out.

I am: 36 (37 in Nov)
Cycle #1 CD 22

I've been 'prepping' my body for this for a year, lost weight, increased my fitness levels and been taking vitamins etc so I feel like I've been mentally preparing for this for AGES, as a result I'm finding the waiting game torturous! I've been tracking my cycles, 27 days average, and using OPK's - just started that this month. We dtd the day before getting a smiley face and then twice on the day we got one.

Are there others who feel impatient/worried like me because you feel time is not on our sides? So bloody stressful!

Blueberry thanks for the tip, I think I will stick with the Clearblue OPK for now as it seems relatively foolproof (and on 3 for 2 in Boots but hopefully won't need that many packs! Maybe I will buy more just to try to invoke Sod's Law...if I buy loads of OPKs maybe I will get a BFP - would be so worth it!)
HopefulBunny roll on the smileys
Sooz congratulations on your engagement - exciting!

@Discodiscostar, first of all welcome . Not sure about implant, but I started ovulating (detectable by ovulation predictor kits OPKs) almost immediately after I came off the pill, although my cycle jumped around a bit before settling down to pre-pill norms.

Re vitamins/diet etc, I've read up a lot and I have some scientific training, so I think I'm reasonably able to screen out the nonsense. First thing is you need to take a daily pre-conception vitamin which includes sufficient folic acid (they all do). I'm taking the Boots own version.

Cutting down on caffeine and alcohol are also recommended. I've cut down caffeine to one tea per day and I have cut down alcohol to very little (a few glasses of wine per week) and nothing at all between fertile window and AF (period).

In terms of diet, decent sources of protein and lots of fruit and veg i.e. a normal healthy diet and avoid things high in vitamin A. Good overview here: www.babycentre.co.uk/a3558/fertility-diet-for-women

There are also other supplements you can take, but their efficacy is not always proven i.e. there aren't always proper clinical studies or their results are inconclusive. I'm taking:

• ubiquinol to improve egg quality (I'm 41)
• evening primrose oil during first half of cycle, which can improve quality of cervical mucous (don't take after ovulation)
• Royal Jelly to balance hormones
• Maca to balance hormones/improve fertility (evidence is traditional use in Peru)

Some useful information here, in particular on specific supplements: natural-fertility-info.com/

I would however beware of some of the info out there that insists you need to "detox" or do a "fertility cleanse" and avoid things like tinned tomatoes or drinking water from plastic bottles, because they're not evidence based.

@Sooz congrats on your future nuptuals! DP recently had general check up with GP including blood pressure and everything was fine, so I just have to hope that would be the case with SA that he won't do...

@Jenebaguetterien - I haven't added up how much I've spent on Clearblue OPKs and I'd better not!

CD25, DPO9, AF due Thurs or Fri. Have slightly tender boobs, but no extreme PMS symptoms like last month and no spotting (yet?). Was spotting 2-3 days before AF in recent months. Convinced I'll get no BFP this month (only 1 on target DTD...), but still have a few days to wait

Congratulations sooz that's great news
Hmm you're all making me think I need to get a clearblue fertility monitor...I just use ic opks atm...
I'm day 13 today but definitely have more discharge although Ovia is predicting fertile week starts tomorrow suppose we should start trying today except OH has come down with something not sure if he'll be up for it! He always says he is then falls asleep as soon as his head hits the pillow!

Thank you all!

Cd 20 today and going for day 21 bloods later but have EWCM! No idea what that's about, didn't have complete positive opk last week or temp rise but haven't been very consistent with either. Just have to hope DP is up for it later tonight!

CD25, DPO10 (luteal phase is 11-12 days). AF is coming; I can feel it

Congratulations Sooz! 😉😉💐💐🍾🍾🍾 when is the wedding? Hope DTD is going well?

Blueberry, how are you feeling?

@Russkispy - without hope & hard done by . This is despite me being so convinced I'd get no BFP this month I even had some wine in 2ww. How are you feeling? Morning sickness? Wierd cravings? Hope all is going well .

Blueberry - sorry to hear it. But please do not give up! Would consider other options? After 5 months of natural TTC, we went for clomid+ovitrelle trigger+iui. Would that be one of your options?! It worked for us from the first time.
I'm 7+2 today and still suffering from pregnancy insomnia every night, and weird dreams. Then started feeling nauseous every day but without being sick. No more sore boobs as such. Just a bit tender and are a bit bigger. Tired all the time. No other symptoms. Early scan (private) is next Tuesday. I'm 7+2 today

@Russkispy - Glad everything is progressing as it should be. Hope insomnia wears off. Have you tried completely giving up caffeine? I have cut down to 1 caffeinated drink per day & I sleep better.

I would consider other options, but DP won't. We went to a clinic and they advised IVF with pre implantation genetic screening, but nothing else. DP finds it too low a chance of success (average is 20%; could be up to 50% if chromosomally normal embryos could be made) for the cost and efforts involved (mostly on my part). DP is already Dad to a teenager so doesn't feel the same way as me. My AMH and AFC are above median for my age, but that still means low fertility. The only test I haven't done is hycosy to check fallopian tubes, so I'll do that this month.

In the meantime, I started taking lots of supplements (ubiquinol, royal jelly, maca) to try to improve my fertility (egg quality) and will see what happens over another few months. After that if still nothing my inclination would be to try IVF but I would need to persuade DP to do that and not sure I can.

AF bang on time, as expected , but at least this month I didn't really have any hope of a different outcome. But on the bright side; ahoy this weekend!

Wishing positive developments & nice weekends to others .

Blueberry, sorry about AF. Also sorry about DP not being understanding and supportive for you! I just hope he agrees to check ups Etc don't give up and stay positive.
I'm still nauseous and only drink organic Lemon and ginger tea or water with fresh lemon. Nothing else. Also feeling like I'm losing my appetite. And just tired all the time. The first Midwife appointment is next week.

Nice to hear from you russkispy hope you little one are keeping well.

blueberry hoping this is the month for both of us!
Think I have just ovulated but only started dtd 2 days ago, hope that's enough
Am seriously considering getting some sort of tubal patency test, but I think it's something around £425! We still haven't been referred for fertility treatment on NHS and as private ivf costs £5000 at our clinic I'm not sure what to do as our ccg will only fund 1 cycle once I reach 36. Wish I had lied and that told them we started earlier!

@miraflores - I'm having hycosy to check fallopian tubes next Thursday. Will check cost (forgot) and let you know. It sounds quite unpleasant, but apparently only takes about 15 mins. Anyway, I wish you some baby dust this month so you won't need it .

I believe City Fertility clinic in london is offering for £300. I got it done in my clinic in Riga before IUI, she used dye, and it only cost €120! I could clear see on the monitor tgey both were open as due flushed through them. It's a little discomfort but nothing major. One might feel dizzy afterwards which I did and lied down for a few minutes before I was released.
Blueberry, good luck with yours! Hope it goes well!

Hi everyone how are we all getting on?!

I'm cd16 and have been getting flashing smiles faces in CB since Monday! Very frustrating as I should have ovulated by now so don't know what's happened hoping maybe the CB missed my surge and I have ovulated as normal!

HopefulBunny Have had the flashing face since CD10 and today CD17 got the static smiley face. I am a nerd and have all the sticks lined up in a row. I thought the lines weren't very dark considering all the 'high' fertility but today's looks much darker.
Blueberry let's hope it's been an investment and you get a BFP very soon!

Thanks blueberry and good luck for Thursday!
How is everyone else doing?
Going thru a bit of a rollercoaster here, arguing more often with OH (this is not like us) but sometimes I think that's what it takes for you both to get back on the same page. Looking at other MN posts it seems hard for a lot of men to "get it."

Passing the year mark of ttc was really tough and really got to start considering adoption as 25% chance per ivf cycle isn't exactly good odds (for me) However looking at the adoption threads it sounds really tough and long winded, I always thought I would get a baby but it seems more likely you'll get an older child from toddler upwards. Hope this doesn't seem fatalistic but I'm always looking (too far) ahead, I guess I'm trying to prepare myself?
Does anyone have a cut off in mind for giving up on having their own biological children? Or am I pulling at a thread no one wants to pull at?
Sorry if I am, but would appreciate your thoughts as I'm just not sure how hopeful I should be of anything anymore
That said of course everyone's different, for example I don't have a huge amount of money to spend and have had not one sniff of a bfp in my life...
We have an appt at midland fertility to discuss results of tests and should really try not to make any rash judgements until then!
Sorry I am freaking out again!

Miraflores hoping things will happen for you... perhaps await the results of your tests and take it from there.
If you want more information about adoption you could contact your local authority or adoption agencies in your area. Friends of mine have just adopted 2 siblings. It's a very big decision but perhaps you can get more information to see if it's something you both would consider.

Had acupuncture this morning and slept peacefully. And just finished our very first scan! A little babi 15mm long with 170bmp. Heard the heartbeat! And it's only one! No twins! Haha doctor was happy with how things going and develop. NIFTY scan/test is booked in 2 weeks

Report back from clinic visit today: I didn't have HyCoSy (£480) as consultant said it wasn't appropriate without having done SA for DP (he has so far avoided, but clinic say it's now essential).

I asked the consultant tons of questions and thought the following worth sharing:

• In terms of supplements, the only proven ones are folic acid and vitamin D and as I'm taking the Boots conception vitamin, this should be sufficient. However, as I'm vegetarian and it's winter, I should get my vitamin D levels checked and take additional Vit D if needed.

• Consultant doesn't object to patients taking ubiquinol, Royal Jelly or Maca (I'm taking them all) as they won't do any harm, but would not recommend them as there is either weak or inconclusive evidence for their impact on fertility.

• The clinic only uses DHEA for perimenopausal women undergoing IVF and wouldn't recommend it for me as my ovarian reserve is not that bad and I'm still ovulating.

• If you've tracked your cycle properly for at least 3 months and it's consistent with only slight variation, then there's no need to continue use OPKs as they're going to tell you the same thing each month. He looked at my charts (4 months) on FF and advised me to TTC on days 12, 14, 16 & 18 for optimising chance of BFP.

• BBT is not the most accurate way to tell if you've ovulated; that would be a blood test a few days afterwards. Looking at my FF charts and the fertility assessment results, he didn't think I needed BBT (or a blood test) to confirm I am still ovulating normally. NB: I've started doing BBT this month, so will continue out of curiosity.

• If DP has a SA and it's fine, I could try Clomid + IUI, which would give a slightly higher chance than natural TTC, but wouldn't be the consultant's first recommendation.

Given my specific circumstances (inc that I was marathon training & had just quit the pill when we started TTC), we definitely haven't yet had six months of optimal TTC. So it's worth TTC-ing (in optimal fashion!!) a bit longer, then if no BFP trying Clomid + IUI before considering IVF. This now feels like a plan and I feel a bit more positive .

Good news russkispy glad you're doing well
blueberry thanks for ur update, it's reminded me that my vit d has been low in the past and maybe I should get it checked again... glad ur feeling more positive about ur next steps, hope OH SA goes well

Hello ladies how is everyone?

I had a pelvic scan today due to heavy AF and was told I have fibroids, slight concerned how this will effect fertility.

Do we have any BFPs on this thread yet? Hope so!

Blueberry very useful info in your post glad your app went well

Hopeful, we've had russkispy with a bfp! No others as yet.

I have what FF app is saying is possibly a triphasic bbt chart but I have zero other symptoms so I'm assuming nothing. Had bloods taken this cycle so will get results and see if something is amiss inside!