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Conception

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These be our very C's & our U's 'N our T's proudly JSing their way to poetic BFPs in #49.Together we Shall take off our robes (to shag),put on our crowns (to copulate);we have/immortal longings in us!

999 replies

Augusthomotherium · 10/06/2015 19:57

Fred rules (copied and adapted from previous Fred)

  1. Thou shalt shag as much as humanly possible in order to get upduffed.
  2. Thou shalt not partake of OPKs, temping, or charting.
  3. Thou shalt keep symptom spotting to a minimum.
  4. Thou shalt share with your fredmates where needed.
  5. Thou shalt not be offended by the word vagina.

JSing lingo


ERTD = Evil Red Tide of Dooooooommmmmmm. Or AF to most others. Also known as 'the witch', 'bitch witch' and 'that one with the red shiny convertible'

Viroid = This is you, dear poster. This is from the first JS thread when someone tried to type 'ladies' and it autocorrected to 'Viroids' - so there you go!

Pant snot = Egg white cervical mucus.

Doing a kitten = Getting upduffed soon after joining (warning: may induce envy in other posters).

POAS = Pee On A Stick (of the pregnancy detecting kind, not from a tree). Also known as PIAR (Pee In A Ramekin - cos we're posh birds innit), or PIATLH (Tea light holder), PIAWG (Wine glass) or anything else you care to pee in! PONF = Pee on Nigel Farage (Self explanatory, who wouldn't?)

ROC = Receptacle of Choice - what one chooses to use for the task of POAS. Optional decorations include photographs of controversial political leaders.

JIAC = Jizz in a Cup. Preferable to jizz on the carpet or jizz in the eye. This one's for the lucky men in our lives.

Shagging like Something = JSing like a teenage nymphomaniac.

Giving a hooya = Giving a much needed slap to a fellow poster in danger of slipping into ttc obsession. Warning - this may happen to you if you start trying to POAS at 5dpo. PUT. THE. PISSY. STICK. DOWN. IT'S TOO EARLY!

Contraband (or Cuntraband) = Of COURSE none of us EVER partake of any silly OPKs or temp charting. They are Contraband.

Icing = ovulating. Another autocorrect development!

Getting your Cape on = planning some serious pouncing on DH/DP

SOTM = Shagger of the Month. Awarded with varying regularity to those viroids who go above and beyond EOD shagging in pursuit of that BFP

TWOT - Two Weeks of Torture. AKA Schroedingering!
TWPU - Two Week Piss Up!

Keeping your gingers = fingers crossed, yet another autocorrect development! Shortened to 'gx'

Doing A Lemon = Testing WAAAAAAAY to early!

Miroid - The male compadre of a viroid

Cat - Compulsory

Skittletits - Killer molten painful tits and nipples

Ghost jizz/goat jazz - When the amazing foof sucks up all the jizz - achieved when coming at the same time/nearly the same time.

The link to Part 47 is HERE

The current Grads Fred is HERE

The current Mumming Fred is HERE

The rather nobbish article in which we became a little bit notorious is HERE

The Fred about 'how wooode' our Fred is darlings can be found HERE and HERE

Stats sheet is HERE

The JustGiving page to donate in memory of TinyChat is HERE

We are the dark side of MN... Welcome!
OP posts:
Thread gallery
31
CountryGal4 · 18/06/2015 09:34

WOOOOOO

jellypi3 · 18/06/2015 09:39

Stats are needed imo Wink

WouldRatherHaveWine · 18/06/2015 09:40

Getting waaaaaay ahead of myself but looked and EDD of 28th Feb. Isn't it a leap year?!

WouldRatherHaveWine · 18/06/2015 09:44

Oh yes! Stats - cycle 3, donned the Cape cd9, 11, 13 and 14. Used CB digi which said iced CD 13 but temp and CM say CD15. Felt a bit sick after eating the last 2 days and thought AF was coming early as I had an earlier break out of spots! Fell asleep before confirming my order of preseed last night!

ColdFeetWarmHeart · 18/06/2015 09:47

A quiet congratulations wine do you know how far along you are? Flowers

WouldRatherHaveWine · 18/06/2015 09:56

Barely anything cold, AF not due til Sunday!

MrsTattoo · 18/06/2015 10:03

Wow! Congratulations wine! Grin Grin Grin

5hell · 18/06/2015 10:59

wine I'm crap at reading ICs as I've never done one, but the FRERs on FB look good! -hooyah for POAS before AF is due though! tut tut
gxxxxx for you...in the words or a viroid I cant remember "today you are pregnant" Grin

i honestly cant keep up with who's upduffed at the moment and the sheet seems a bit broken :( so apologies if I say innapropriate things to upduffed viroids and vise versa!

nfmv - it got an early morning dose of jizz post shower so i probably smell of sex!

jellypi3 · 18/06/2015 11:09

Yep leap year next year Grin

Ain626 · 18/06/2015 11:15

Yay wine I am so pleased for you. Hope its a sticky bean. If you can hold out until Sunday that would be pretty sweet. I don't think I would be able to though. I was hoping to get a bfp so I could get a fathers day card from the bean and tell him that way..

cold I am on metformin but not really noticing any differences to be honest. I'm trying to reduce carbs and eat more low GI but I think I'm going to have to up my game. Have started to go to the gym again (I got out of the habit for a few months, trying to get back in to it again).

More tummy cramps, and more feeling slightly nauseous again today. That's practically every day this week. I wouldn't mind if it was for a good reason... bfp or af both class as a good reason.

Supposed to be being constructive today. It started off well, but has faded somewhat...

ChatEnOeuf · 18/06/2015 11:30

Congrats Wine!

honeysucklejasmine · 18/06/2015 12:32

The stats sheet...if you are on a mobile, download the Google "sheets" app, which has a green symbol very reminiscent of excel. If you open up the spread sheet in your browser, it seems to link with google sheets. You can then edit the sheet by going in to google sheets app and opening the file from there.

Its not as hard as I made it sound then. Blush

honeysucklejasmine · 18/06/2015 12:38

I have to have my baby between 22-26tg Feb, to follow family rules. But 29th Feb would be cool!

(We ALL have birthdays between the 22nd and 26th of various months.)

CarrotPuff · 18/06/2015 13:23

Oh wow congrats Wine! Hope it's a sticky one Flowers

5hell the donation was yesterday afternoon, all good, iron ok, so did get to donate, which I am very happy about.

Star for your GP Sock

Welcome Tattoo!

The stats sheet doesn't open for me for the last 2 freds. If I go to one fred before that (46?) it does. Anyone else got this problem?

NFMV: DP declined a shag last night. Last shag was on Monday so EOD plan has failed. Stupid miriod Angry But then my vagina is behaving a bit strange - got some pant snot yesterday but it was quite thick and yellowish, like post icing. So maybe yesterday was pointless anyway? But then I haven't noticed any pant snot before that. Who knows! I was promised a shag tonight though, so that should cover it if we are to have any chance this month.

Next week I'm going on some stupid Job Centre course which will keep me busy. So that's a good thing. Then we are going away the weekend after that so hopefully all the packing will keep me distracted too.

ThursdayLast · 18/06/2015 13:44

wine GrinGrinGrin congrats!

NFMV - slippery as a slippery thing down there. Sooner than I expected, so DH is in for a pleasant surprise later Wink
Also DS is off to his granny's tomorrow arvo [more winking, you know what I mean]

5hell · 18/06/2015 16:14

carrot thanks for the stats sheet tip, yep went back to older link and it's all good, so i've bookmarked that now

yes, we know what you mean thurs Grin
get shagging

ThursdayLast · 18/06/2015 16:53

I too had to go back into the annals of JSing threads to get the stats sheet to open - but with honeys app tip and a bit of patience I'm on there!
Huzzah!

justtheonethen · 18/06/2015 16:57

wine! Hurrah! Frer frer frer (chanted)

country you can have her today, if you get a shag in, I can't be arsed

honeysucklejasmine · 18/06/2015 17:25

Gosh Just, you can't just change a joint custody arrangement on a whim to suit you, you know. It is set up to be in the best interest of the fanjo, not your social life! Wink

CountryGal4 · 18/06/2015 17:55

just can we just ship her off to a friends? Haha
I don't want to either but am confused. Opks utterly blank but cvx high soft and had the tee it's bit of ewcm. I'm gonna have to shag aren't i. I just really don't want to sigh. I'm going to have to put my game face on Angry

Hobbit19 · 18/06/2015 18:37

Ooh tentative congratulations to you Wine!! Grin

jellypi3 · 18/06/2015 18:41

country Lazy shag! They are the best

CountryGal4 · 18/06/2015 19:38

Plan b jelly drinking prosecco. Normally two glasses of that and I'm anyone's. If that doesn't work then I'm broken

justtheonethen · 18/06/2015 19:58

It's official we are one and the same, prosecco here too. I will if you will!

5hell · 18/06/2015 20:02

ooh wish i had prosecco, instead i've got shaky arms from body pump, no DH (out in london for drinks), M&S sushi was a bit disappointing and i've still got to walk the dogs (who have eaten all the strawberries before i could pick them!!!!). don't worry i am aware these are very feeble moans and I deserve little no sympathy!

five , feathered how are you two doing today?