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Conception

When's the best time to get pregnant? Use our interactive ovulation calculator to work out when you're most fertile and most likely to conceive.

These be our very C's & our U's 'N our T's proudly JSing their way to poetic BFPs in #49.Together we Shall take off our robes (to shag),put on our crowns (to copulate);we have/immortal longings in us!

999 replies

Augusthomotherium · 10/06/2015 19:57

Fred rules (copied and adapted from previous Fred)

  1. Thou shalt shag as much as humanly possible in order to get upduffed.
  2. Thou shalt not partake of OPKs, temping, or charting.
  3. Thou shalt keep symptom spotting to a minimum.
  4. Thou shalt share with your fredmates where needed.
  5. Thou shalt not be offended by the word vagina.

JSing lingo


ERTD = Evil Red Tide of Dooooooommmmmmm. Or AF to most others. Also known as 'the witch', 'bitch witch' and 'that one with the red shiny convertible'

Viroid = This is you, dear poster. This is from the first JS thread when someone tried to type 'ladies' and it autocorrected to 'Viroids' - so there you go!

Pant snot = Egg white cervical mucus.

Doing a kitten = Getting upduffed soon after joining (warning: may induce envy in other posters).

POAS = Pee On A Stick (of the pregnancy detecting kind, not from a tree). Also known as PIAR (Pee In A Ramekin - cos we're posh birds innit), or PIATLH (Tea light holder), PIAWG (Wine glass) or anything else you care to pee in! PONF = Pee on Nigel Farage (Self explanatory, who wouldn't?)

ROC = Receptacle of Choice - what one chooses to use for the task of POAS. Optional decorations include photographs of controversial political leaders.

JIAC = Jizz in a Cup. Preferable to jizz on the carpet or jizz in the eye. This one's for the lucky men in our lives.

Shagging like Something = JSing like a teenage nymphomaniac.

Giving a hooya = Giving a much needed slap to a fellow poster in danger of slipping into ttc obsession. Warning - this may happen to you if you start trying to POAS at 5dpo. PUT. THE. PISSY. STICK. DOWN. IT'S TOO EARLY!

Contraband (or Cuntraband) = Of COURSE none of us EVER partake of any silly OPKs or temp charting. They are Contraband.

Icing = ovulating. Another autocorrect development!

Getting your Cape on = planning some serious pouncing on DH/DP

SOTM = Shagger of the Month. Awarded with varying regularity to those viroids who go above and beyond EOD shagging in pursuit of that BFP

TWOT - Two Weeks of Torture. AKA Schroedingering!
TWPU - Two Week Piss Up!

Keeping your gingers = fingers crossed, yet another autocorrect development! Shortened to 'gx'

Doing A Lemon = Testing WAAAAAAAY to early!

Miroid - The male compadre of a viroid

Cat - Compulsory

Skittletits - Killer molten painful tits and nipples

Ghost jizz/goat jazz - When the amazing foof sucks up all the jizz - achieved when coming at the same time/nearly the same time.

The link to Part 47 is HERE

The current Grads Fred is HERE

The current Mumming Fred is HERE

The rather nobbish article in which we became a little bit notorious is HERE

The Fred about 'how wooode' our Fred is darlings can be found HERE and HERE

Stats sheet is HERE

The JustGiving page to donate in memory of TinyChat is HERE

We are the dark side of MN... Welcome!
OP posts:
Thread gallery
31
daisyspice · 15/06/2015 10:31

Congratulations honey! well chuffed for you Grin sending loads of sticky thoughts!!!

lildottie · 15/06/2015 11:51

I might be mad but i've just delayed my IVF cycle by 2 weeks. The reason being that my cycle isn't playing ball so my dates af due don't fall in the right weeks! By delaying i fall in the right weeks and give myself one more chance to try naturally before we do the IVF. If my period fucks me around now I will not be happy!

stoatystoat · 15/06/2015 11:55

Fingers crossed the witch behaved lil

CarrotPuff · 15/06/2015 11:56

Oh wow honey congrats, what wonderful news! Sending gluey thoughts to your bean!

honeysucklejasmine · 15/06/2015 12:01

Thank you so much everyone Flowers

justtheonethen · 15/06/2015 12:43

She better behave for you lil!

gaggiagirl · 15/06/2015 12:48

ooh when will you start it lil? lots of luck!

lildottie · 15/06/2015 13:14

will start bcp between 14/7 and 7/8 then first scan 9/9 and egg collection wc 21/9. ec was going to be w/c 7/9 so at least I haven't had to delay a whole month!

stoatystoat · 15/06/2015 13:23

Ooh exciting. That was a typo on the behaved, I meant behaves. I do read these threads. Honest.

Got an appointment with my doctor tomorrow, not feeling optimistic but she's a great doctor and is a maternity cover and will be gone soon, so I need to see her before she goes if I want help (I know I sounds obsessive, but one of the other doctors was crap with my miscarriage so I'm avoiding him, I've seen him since but not for anything mental). Worked at home today and been productive at least.

honeysucklejasmine · 15/06/2015 14:26

Lil I am so excited about your IVF! I know it sucka to go through but you are going to get that BFP!

Illiria · 15/06/2015 15:12

Yay honey congratulations.

Lil that sounds like a solid plan, better to have everything lined up and feel comfortable with the plan than to wonder what if.

nuttybananas · 15/06/2015 15:14

lill - got lots of fingers crossed for a last month of JSing...

So I'm now 3 days late - peed on an out of date stick and it was BFN on Saturday - don't feel like AF is coming - tummy is all fluttery but I think thats because I am hoping I'm upduffed. If AF is being cruel and going to be late its going to be a massive comedown...
I need to go buy candles, balloons and if poss a helium balloon now from tesco - am in two minds whether to get a pg test. Got a lovely day planned for tomorrow for DD's birthday - if I get a bfn today it might spoil my mood whereas if i wait at least I put off the feeling till later in the week...

justtheonethen · 15/06/2015 15:19

Poas nut, at least you will know then

5hell · 15/06/2015 15:32

hmmm... tricky one nutty maybe buy an FRER but dont pee until wed (when AF will be more late and line stronger Smile) if the witch arrives (bitch!) at least you'll have an in-date test for next month

stoat i feel i should and wish i could have some better advice for you - my sister has had depression for many years on and off, but i struggle to help her either. it sounds like absent dh is a bad trigger, so if you know he's going away/out in advance you could try arranging a little meet-up/outing to keep you from going downhill too much (i know this is easier said than done, and often only possible when having good days anyway, but something to bear in mind). but at the same time, dont try to do too much which may stress you out (unless you love being busy busy)

...see weak advice, but at least the sun is out Confused

nuttybananas · 15/06/2015 15:48

Shell - will def buy something but will probably spend all evening umming and ahhing about whether to use today or do it on Wed morning... (prob Wed morning knowing me, and get the witch in full flow while out tomorrow!)

What's the deal with frer tests - why are they the recommended pg test usually on MN? Last time around I remember being surprised at the price differences and being a canny yorkshire lass I bought the cheapest supermarket test...

honeysucklejasmine · 15/06/2015 16:17

Frers are the best for early, strong lines. Look at my PIC, the frer is by far the clearest, and they were all dipped in the same stuff. Get one!

SkyWasMadeOfAmethyst · 15/06/2015 16:33

De lurking to say OMG honey! Congrats!!!

Lil gx for you.

Missed you viroids...

honeysucklejasmine · 15/06/2015 16:47

Thank you Sky!

Hobbit19 · 15/06/2015 17:36

Ah, I think it us lovely that Jelly and Honey have become upduffed within a few weeks of each other. Just seems right that you guys get to hold hands through pregnancy as you did through ttc. (Think hormones have turned me soft or sumink!) Grin

stoatystoat · 15/06/2015 17:54

Thank you for attempting 5hell, I know I'm such hard work at the moment. I know I'm getting worse...I think I was pretty bad before but I've been relying on getting pregnant again and I know the longer that is from happening, the worse I am getting. This weekend was the first time DH had been away from me, I've taken to going home with him but it was a very baby heavy social this time so I decided I was best off not going. It was a risk because I knew I was at the end of the 2ww, I thought being busy on the Saturday was enough. It also coincided with my nephew having chicken pox so sister wasn't available either. I've asked Dh he to be more responsive now, i.e. If it becomes apparent I'm having a bad day, he makes me a priority and alters his plans. It's a huge shift for us both living like this as I've never been clingy! I don't seem to have many friends since the mc either which isn't helping.

Sorry I keep bringing the happy fred down. Poor form!

honeysucklejasmine · 15/06/2015 17:57

I am so pleased to be reunited with my JellyPi! [heart]

CountryGal4 · 15/06/2015 18:39

Dh just turned down sex as he's hungry Hmm

ColdFeetWarmHeart · 15/06/2015 18:51

Can't believe his priorities country lol Wink

Ain626 · 15/06/2015 18:57

Stoat if there is anything I can do to help please don't hesitate to PM me. I can't claim to know what you are going through - I believe depression is different for each person that goes through it, and I have not have to go through the pain of a MC. This time around I am dealing with it far better than previous 'bad spells' (not sure what to call them... episodes maybe?) though I have had definite bad days... Anyway... Yea... Feel free to talk to me if I can help in any tiny way. Flowers

Littlechocolatebiscuit · 15/06/2015 18:57

I'm late to the party, but congratulations honey! Cake