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Conception

When's the best time to get pregnant? Use our interactive ovulation calculator to work out when you're most fertile and most likely to conceive.

Jazz up your ROC, Invoke a Wankban, Shake your Beaver and Find Cupboard Love with the Just Shagging Viroids! Don't forget to Cup and Run...it's JS 38!

999 replies

ChatEnOeuf · 26/01/2015 17:40

Ladies, Fred title says it all; we are the ones who shag as much as our men can cope with in order to get upduffed without the stress of scientific whatnots!

Fred rules (copied and adapted from previous Fred)

  1. Thou shalt shag as much as humanly possible in order to get upduffed.
  2. Thou shalt not partake of OPKs, temping, or charting.
  3. Thou shalt keep symptom spotting to a minimum.
  4. Thou shalt share with your fredmates where needed.

JSing lingo


ERTD = Evil Red Tide of Dooooooommmmmmm. Or AF to most others. Also know as 'the witch', 'bitch witch' and 'that one with the red shiny convertible'

Viroid = This is you, dear poster. This is from the first JS thread when someone tried to type 'ladies' and it autocorrected to 'Viroids' - so there you go!

Pant snot = Egg white cervical mucus.

Doing a kitten = Getting upduffed soon after joining (warning: may induce envy in other posters).

POAS = Pee On A Stick (of the pregnancy detecting kind, not from a tree). Also known as PIAR (Pee In A Ramekin - cos we're posh birds innit). Or PIATLH (Tea light holder) PIAWG (Wine glass) or anything else you care to pee in! PONF = Pee on Nigel Farage. Self explanatory, who wouldn't?

ROC - Receptacle of Choice - what one chooses to use for the task of POAS. Optional decorations include photographs of controversial political leaders.

JIAC = Jizz in a Cup. Preferable to jizz on the carpet or jizz in the eye. This one's for the lucky men in our lives.

Shagging like <strong>Something</strong> = JSing like a teenage nymphomaniac.

Giving a hooya = Giving a much needed slap to a fellow poster in danger of slipping into ttc obsession. Warning - this may happen to you if you start trying to POAS at 5dpo. PUT. THE. PISSY. STICK. DOWN. IT'S TOO EARLY!

Contraband = Of COURSE none of us EVER partake of any silly OPKs or temp charting. They are Contraband.

Icing = ovulating. Another autocorrect development!

Getting your Cape on = planning some serious pouncing on DH/DP

SOTM = Shagger of the Month. Awarded with varying regularity to those viroids who go above and beyond EOD shagging in pursuit of that BFP

TWOT - Two Weeks of Torture. AKA Schroedingering!
TWPU - Two Week Piss Up!

Keeping your gingers = fingers crossed, yet another autocorrect development! Shortened to 'gx'

Doing A <strong>Lemon</strong> = Testing WAAAAAAAY to early!

The link to Part 37 is <a class="break-all" href="http://www.mumsnet.com/Talk/conception/2282306-The-37th-Just-Shaggers-are-on-their-way-Watch-out-for-accidental-erections-and-bruising-injections-polish-your-perfect-ovaries-were-climbing-a-mountain-and-digging-deeply-to-get-our-BFPs?msgid=52150588#52150588" target="_blank">here</a>

The current Grads Fred is <a class="break-all" href="http://www.mumsnet.com/Talk/antenatal_clubs/2284897-20th-JSing-GRADS-thread-our-chats-still-filthy-just-not-in-front-of-the-baby" target="_blank">here</a>

The rather nobbish article in which we became a little bit notorious is <a class="break-all" href="http://www.independent.co.uk/life-style/health-and-families/health-news/the-dark-side-of-mumsnet-my-shocking-tour-of-the-websites-nether-regions-8905055.html" rel="nofollow" target="_blank">here</a>

We are the dark side of MN. Welcome.
OP posts:
Thread gallery
25
Noniks3 · 30/01/2015 19:34

Where are your jammies from Country?! I neeeed some!

gaggiagirl · 30/01/2015 19:35

country I love the jammies!
I think I see something in the 3rd pic. Do you see anything in real life? Its always hard to see in photos.

Noniks3 · 30/01/2015 19:36

Think I see something in pic 3 too Country

G LTB that's totally a fucking line! Missed the egg my arse. Congrats lovely xxx

Poochieblue · 30/01/2015 19:37

thank you viroids you speak wise words!! am going to have a soak in the bath and try and shake my mood, I need to shag later so need to buck up! lol!
ga hurry up! DH could be wrong, you need to show the experts us :-)
I can't see anything of those country am so sorry :-/ I was convincing myself I could on the website. we need an invert :-/ x

CountryGal4 · 30/01/2015 19:37

They're actually dh's from next/Burtons a few years ago. Of course I see something I've been staring at it all morn and driven myself insane?!?!?

Hobbit19 · 30/01/2015 19:38

ga LTB immediately. Grin

Lil is it bad that I fully snorted at 'he's only got one testicle? (Mature)

DH said he felt much better this morning so gx we are back on the JSing bandwagon. Think it may be too late thus month a little more never hurt did it? unless you do it every day

Poochieblue · 30/01/2015 19:39

congrats again ga that is so a fucking line!!! love it!!!

country the others are right actually there is something there on pic 3 but I think pics are hard to tell anyway!! and yes I want your Jammie's!!! x

CountryGal4 · 30/01/2015 19:44

ga that is a ruddy line girl!! Yaaaay

Noniks3 · 30/01/2015 19:45

Right Country I demand a FRER tomorrow. And when it's a BFP I demand your jammies as penance for doing a kitten Wink

CountryGal4 · 30/01/2015 19:48

noniks I live in the sticks frer are hard to come by unless I drive 10 miles. I can do another IC in the morn? What's a kitten??

Indigoblue2 · 30/01/2015 19:51

ga that's without doubt a line, I can see it clearly! Tell DP to go to specsavers... Congrats!!!!! Awesome way to start the weekend.

country I'm pretty sure I can see something on yours too.

Indigoblue2 · 30/01/2015 19:53

jelly (waves), hi doll, I miss your jelly ass! Need to get me ass back on here and chat more. I saw you got a positive OPK, fanfuckingtastic, I love being able to know when you are icing. Is this your first cycle of getting a clear positive?

Poochieblue · 30/01/2015 19:53

a kitten is an affectionate name for you viroids who come along on here and get uplugged straight away :-)

Poochieblue · 30/01/2015 19:54

*upduffed rather pmsl!

CountryGal4 · 30/01/2015 19:55

Uplugged.... Saving that term for later haha

LaLa5 · 30/01/2015 19:58

gaggia LTB immediately and take up with cunthawk! (actually no that's just weird)

That is definitely a line!

country I can't tell in third pic whether I'm seeing something or not. I've been staring and staring at it. Can you do another tomorrow with FMU?

CountryGal4 · 30/01/2015 20:09

la you and me both. Will do fmu and report back viroids

lildottie · 30/01/2015 20:31

I think I've gone blind from all the bfns I've had. I can't see a line on ga's. not sure about country's.

pud its not funny, its unfucking fair! no it is funny

gaggiagirl · 30/01/2015 20:33

country I live in the sticks too although there's a bustling metropolis about 4 miles away and poor DP had to go to 4 different shops to find a frer. Got one in boots in the end after trying Asda Sainsbury and Tesco.

ZylaB · 30/01/2015 20:33

I went out with a guy once who had 1 testicle (and a fake second one) tmi?? ;)

CountryGal4 · 30/01/2015 20:36

ga boots is the only place I can get one from too. 10-15 mins away

jellypi3 · 30/01/2015 21:02

ga fuck yeh well done lass!!

ind lovely to hear you are ok! :) yeh first pos OPK!

Today's OPK was negative. So I have no idea what is going on. I've shagged, that's all that matters

Ainat266 · 30/01/2015 21:18

Gar. Typed out a reply and seem to have lost it.

gaggia I'm sure I can see a line. Woop woop.

country I'm not as certain with yours, but there may be something in that third pic. Ic's tend to be bright white if they are negative. If you can see something I would definitely say you should test again with fmu.

This is turning out to be a fabulous Fred. I bow down to you chat.

Ainat266 · 30/01/2015 21:22

Oh, and zyla I have to ask.. A fake testicle? What was it made from? Was it only there for cosmetic reasons in a sort of protecting his man points kind of way? Was it not obvious it was fake? Haha. Sorry. .

Poochieblue · 30/01/2015 21:46

ain so glad you asked those questions! I'm intrigued too!! my faintest of faint lines on yesterday's opk has materialized into absolutely blankness on today's! no idea what's going on. more shagging I guess lol x