Come one, come all, the Jason Doner-Van is open for business! Don your disco pants, brandish your rim brush and get on it! Its Just Shagging part 24! Can we beat 23's BFP hat trick, flange wankers?!

[RPopz]

Ladies, Fred title says it all; we are the ones who shag as much as our men can cope with in order to get upduffed without the stress of scientific whatnots!

Fred rules (copied from previous Fred)

1. Thou shalt shag as much as humanly possible in order to get upduffed.
2. Thou shalt not partake of OPKs, temping, or charting.
3. Thou shalt keep symptom spotting to a minimum.
4. Thou shalt share with your fredmates where needed.

JSing lingo

ERTD = Evil Red Tide of Dooooooommmmmmm. Or AF to most others.

Viroid = This is you, dear poster. This is from the first JS thread when someone tried to type 'ladies' and it autocorrected to 'Viroids' - so there you go!

Pant snot = Egg white cervical mucus.

Doing a kitten = Getting upduffed soon after joining (warning: may induce envy in other posters).

POAS = Pee On A Stick (of the pregnancy detecting kind, not from a tree). Also known as PIAR (Pee In A Ramekin - cos we're posh birds innit). Or PIATLH (Tea light holder) PIAWG (Wine glass) or anything else you care to pee in!

Shagging like something = JSing like a teenage nymphomaniac.

Giving a hooya = Giving a much needed slap to a fellow poster in danger of slipping into ttc obsession.

Contraband = Of COURSE none of us EVER partake of any silly OPKs or temp charting. They are Contraband.

Icing = ovulating. Another autocorrect development!

Getting your Cape on = planning some serious pouncing on DH/DP

TWOT - Two Weeks of Torture!

The link to Part 23 is  <a class="break-all" href="http://www.mumsnet.com/Talk/conception/2063821-Hell-no-Aunt-Flo-You-cant-park-that-red-convertible-here-This-space-is-reserved-Turn-on-tune-in-and-cop-off-Its-Just-Shagging-part-23?" target="_blank">Here</a>

The current Grads Fred is <a class="break-all" href="http://www.mumsnet.com/Talk/antenatal_clubs/1817751-Just-Shagging-Grads-Fred-8-Roll-up-roll-up-all-Viroids-welcome?" target="_blank">here</a>

The rather nobbish article in which we became a little bit notorious is <a class="break-all" href="http://www.independent.co.uk/life-style/health-and-families/health-news/the-dark-side-of-mumsnet-my-shocking-tour-of-the-websites-nether-regions-8905055.html" rel="nofollow" target="_blank">here</a>

Happy shagging shaggers!

Hahahaha!!! tee that made me splutter

Hahahhahaha Tee! I think you'll be safe. Keep this up and you'll be SOTM.

I don't want to go to work. Please can someone think of an excuse for me to go back to bed . Too tired.

Your pg wil phone in sick. Ms just too bad this morning!

I'll keep you posted on the Zen...its dn day today!

And actually I may just be crazy. Last night I was imagining conversations I may have with my unconceived children last night. I'm clearly losing it! It stemmed from thinking about dn and things I'd do differently to his parents.

tee you clearly belong here! I too have crazy ideas like this but that's a new one even on me! Its enough trouble getting dh to do it twice in one week let alone one evening!

He's quite willing to be constantly leapt on at the moment, so I'm taking it while the goings good. I did a shoulder stand in bed last night after the event hoping to encourage the little guys 'up' and forgot that I don't have the balance of my former lithe 14 year old self and subsequently knocked off his nightcap, my iPhone and broke a lamp. No round two for me :(

Haha Tee! You'll fit in well here

Wil if you're phoning in sick then so am I! Oh wait, I'm already on the bus.....

Cbfm could be worth a shot Lala - esp if its free? But if your cycles are long then you'll have to pee on a lot of sticks!!

Sorry for being absent guys, AF sent me into a mega strop...

Tee was your DH actually wearing a nightcap? Like wee willy winkie?

haha, no. There's no headgear in bed except on special occasions.

I'm trying very hard to be lighthearted about this whole TTC thing, but inside my (until recently dormant) ovaries are screaming 'Fertilise me!!! FERTILISE ME NOW!!!!!'

I hear ya, trying to be all cool 'n that... But by jingo, just get upduffwards!

Hahahaha Tee, good work. Hope you feel more positive soon Kato.

Unfortunately it would be very poor form for me to skive off work so had to suck it up and get my ass in gear.

I imagine conversations with MiniWil in the future all the time Lil so I don't think you're mad although I am not a good benchmark of bonkerness.

It's not just us then....DH told me he's already going to tell the unfertilised egglets what happened in the universe to make them come to be. Like, stars and stuff. Deep..

Glad to hear that it's not my phone that's throwing a wobbly and that it is the android app.

Phew!

T'internet is on in our house now whoop whoop!

thank fck for that....Mr Duck was driving me mad!

Haha tee proper just snorted then.
How are all the viroids tonight?

Tonight I will mostly be lying on the sofa eating chocolate.

We are getting the cape on tonight. Mr Duck was to tired to perform last night so I've warned him that refusal is not an option for the rest of the week!

Fx he is compliant later ha ha x

Dont eat too much choccy then Ayles

I'd quite like some chocolate. I am knackered, looking forward to bedtime.

Get that cape on Duck!

Ah I'll be grand I went to tesco at lunch time and bought the Cadbury one with popping candy and jelly beans.
It's in the fridge chilling nicely. Mr Duck is late home...

Chocolate in the fridge? Ruined!

Agreed Dulce!

What's with all these fancy new Cadbury flavours anyway? DH brought home some cola+ pretzel+something else flavoured abomination the other day!! Rank!!

What is this with popping candy and jelly beans? I do not know this. Please share immediately or half an hour after you take it out the fridge.

Oh I'm pleased I can find support for the chocolate debate in here. I lose it in my house. All DH family are firm fridge users.

Oh I'm pleased I can find support for the chocolate debate in here. I lose it in my house. All DH family are firm fridge users.

She really is pleased! ;-)

Well the chocolate is one of the cadbury marvellous creations ones and has popping xandy jelly beans and smarties. Totally delish.
It makes me happy.
It's the only chocolate that I like cold cause it tastes sooooo much better.

I had better hide it before bugger face aka mr duck finds it!

at 'Bugger Face'. Great, totally got a chocolate craving now.