Come one, come all, the Jason Doner-Van is open for business! Don your disco pants, brandish your rim brush and get on it! Its Just Shagging part 24! Can we beat 23's BFP hat trick, flange wankers?!

[RPopz]

Ladies, Fred title says it all; we are the ones who shag as much as our men can cope with in order to get upduffed without the stress of scientific whatnots!

Fred rules (copied from previous Fred)

1. Thou shalt shag as much as humanly possible in order to get upduffed.
2. Thou shalt not partake of OPKs, temping, or charting.
3. Thou shalt keep symptom spotting to a minimum.
4. Thou shalt share with your fredmates where needed.

JSing lingo

ERTD = Evil Red Tide of Dooooooommmmmmm. Or AF to most others.

Viroid = This is you, dear poster. This is from the first JS thread when someone tried to type 'ladies' and it autocorrected to 'Viroids' - so there you go!

Pant snot = Egg white cervical mucus.

Doing a kitten = Getting upduffed soon after joining (warning: may induce envy in other posters).

POAS = Pee On A Stick (of the pregnancy detecting kind, not from a tree). Also known as PIAR (Pee In A Ramekin - cos we're posh birds innit). Or PIATLH (Tea light holder) PIAWG (Wine glass) or anything else you care to pee in!

Shagging like something = JSing like a teenage nymphomaniac.

Giving a hooya = Giving a much needed slap to a fellow poster in danger of slipping into ttc obsession.

Contraband = Of COURSE none of us EVER partake of any silly OPKs or temp charting. They are Contraband.

Icing = ovulating. Another autocorrect development!

Getting your Cape on = planning some serious pouncing on DH/DP

TWOT - Two Weeks of Torture!

The link to Part 23 is  <a class="break-all" href="http://www.mumsnet.com/Talk/conception/2063821-Hell-no-Aunt-Flo-You-cant-park-that-red-convertible-here-This-space-is-reserved-Turn-on-tune-in-and-cop-off-Its-Just-Shagging-part-23?" target="_blank">Here</a>

The current Grads Fred is <a class="break-all" href="http://www.mumsnet.com/Talk/antenatal_clubs/1817751-Just-Shagging-Grads-Fred-8-Roll-up-roll-up-all-Viroids-welcome?" target="_blank">here</a>

The rather nobbish article in which we became a little bit notorious is <a class="break-all" href="http://www.independent.co.uk/life-style/health-and-families/health-news/the-dark-side-of-mumsnet-my-shocking-tour-of-the-websites-nether-regions-8905055.html" rel="nofollow" target="_blank">here</a>

Happy shagging shaggers!

I'm firmly on the fridge-Choc side over here! I like to nibble so it takes longer to melt
I just had a massive bowl of Jamaica Ginger Cake & custard. NOM.

Stupid app! Was worth saying though!

Ok, I'm having some galaxy now. It's all your fault!

I literally logged on while I was mid-mouthful of milkybar! Seems the choc demons are out tonight. and I might have had a some wine because the exhaust fell off my car and I was traumatised

I am firmly in the room temperature choco camp too. OH is a fridge person, I think it makes it taste funny.

Speaking of which, with all three of my whiz bang apps giving me me a different day of egg-ripeness, I'm going to try and entice DH to do the bad thing when he gets back from the gym. While I sit here and expand on the couch from chocolate.

How come you all have chocolate in the house? If I kept it in the house it would all get eaten immediately. Very jealous.

Don that cape Tee.

I've no choccy either. Not really enjoying it at the mo anyway - stupid pregnant tastebuds!!

Sounds like a plan tee. Its the JSing way

I only bought my choc yesterday so it wasn't around long before I started it wil. Pretty good at not finishing it though! Work think in weird...

Day off so wake up early - what is with that?!

Dulcet I do that too. Wake up early on a day off.

I'm off tomorrow and I will bet I ping awake unlike today where I have gad to force my eyelids open.

Have a good day y'all

X

Humm, managed to JS in the end after OH fell into bed and started to doze off last night, Ha!
He's just called me to say he's away nearly all next week though for work, and I would put a cash bet on something cycle-based happening then, instead of now. I reckon I'm about a week behind what my technology is telling me. Oh well. Best keep having it off just in case :D

Sickness bug has slightly subsided. Headache has grown humungously due to 3 very loud boys running jumping arguing shouting dancing and singing at each other because they won't sodding go out because it's raining!!!!!! I feel faint and Sicky, had the runs last night, cold swats the night before. I've even managed to shift weight from somewhere in my body to my stomach (its probably just bloating due to oncoming af) and my jeans are tighter, boobs are doing nothing though. Definitely not pg but so want to do a test to fulfil the crazy notion that perhaps all my sickness bug symptoms could possibly be something amazing. I say amazing however, on Sunday I may be considering sterilisation with the way my boys are!!!! Raaaarrrrggghhhh

Oh God Babble, the joys of half-term!

I wake up early every blooming morning, although did manage to get back to sleep until alarm went off at 6.30 this morning. I can't remember the last time I slept past 7. Still, last day of my working week today which makes me smile.

Oh my god I've just caught up on posts and now just really really want chocolate!!!

Chocolate in fridge is wrong! It takes ages to get the lovely melty flavour if it's too cold. Ketchup in fridge also wrong. I'm coming around to bread in the fridge (Mr La insists) but still thing it's weird.

duck - did you get cape on?

We went on date night last night and were so pissed that when we tried to dtd we ended up laughing too much and gave up. Fail.

Went to doc this morning - I'm going for blood tests and ultrasound to check there's nothing untoward. Told Mr La he's got to wank in a pot - he told me not a problem he already does so on a daily basis and puts it back in the cupboard I am hoping he's joking...mental note not to use any pots without checking first

Lala have you checked the bathroom cabinet for receptacles that may double up as semen storage pots?

Lala have you checked the bathroom cabinet for receptacles that may double up as semen storage pots?

that's not contact lens fluid... it's... ARRRGH! ARRRGH!

Is that hair gel?

Hahahaha, let's hope they're not in the fridge with the bread! Mr Lala sounds funny.

Is that hair gel?

bread in fridge - no. chocolate in fridge -no. ketchup in fridge - of course you put it in the fridge, the bottle says refrigerate after opening!

and I believe that's me all caught up!

Bread and chocolate in the fridge.... nooooooo! Ketchup, meh whatever.

Can't stop lol-ing at wank in a pot Lala! Glad you've got the ball rolling. Date night sounds lovely

Hope you're feeling better soon Babble. Have any of the kids had it?

I totally agree on all 3 counts Lil.

Ah, but lil I just don't like it when it's all cold ;)

But I will accept the judge's decision - as of course this is final, particularly when there is a gavel involved!

I'm going to be particularly careful when using any kind of pot for a while in my house.

I had an ex boyfriend who used to wank into a sock and put it back in the drawer. Yuck.

babble why do you think not pg? Did you POAS?

Cape has been on twice this week. It ain't happening tonight though. Buggerface has a face like a bulldog licking piss off a nettle, he's got a cob on for some reason.

Forget chocolate pass the feckin vodka!

You have such a lovely turn of phrase Duck

Hahahahaha Duck and lala you're both hilarious. I hope Lala that he became an ex quite soon after you discovered said soggy sock.

I'm glad I'm not TTC at the moment as MrWil is pissing me off to unbelievable levels. I probably look a bit similar to Buggerface.

duck that was a 5 star post! Love it!!!