Come one, come all, the Jason Doner-Van is open for business! Don your disco pants, brandish your rim brush and get on it! Its Just Shagging part 24! Can we beat 23's BFP hat trick, flange wankers?!

[RPopz]

Ladies, Fred title says it all; we are the ones who shag as much as our men can cope with in order to get upduffed without the stress of scientific whatnots!

Fred rules (copied from previous Fred)

1. Thou shalt shag as much as humanly possible in order to get upduffed.
2. Thou shalt not partake of OPKs, temping, or charting.
3. Thou shalt keep symptom spotting to a minimum.
4. Thou shalt share with your fredmates where needed.

JSing lingo

ERTD = Evil Red Tide of Dooooooommmmmmm. Or AF to most others.

Viroid = This is you, dear poster. This is from the first JS thread when someone tried to type 'ladies' and it autocorrected to 'Viroids' - so there you go!

Pant snot = Egg white cervical mucus.

Doing a kitten = Getting upduffed soon after joining (warning: may induce envy in other posters).

POAS = Pee On A Stick (of the pregnancy detecting kind, not from a tree). Also known as PIAR (Pee In A Ramekin - cos we're posh birds innit). Or PIATLH (Tea light holder) PIAWG (Wine glass) or anything else you care to pee in!

Shagging like something = JSing like a teenage nymphomaniac.

Giving a hooya = Giving a much needed slap to a fellow poster in danger of slipping into ttc obsession.

Contraband = Of COURSE none of us EVER partake of any silly OPKs or temp charting. They are Contraband.

Icing = ovulating. Another autocorrect development!

Getting your Cape on = planning some serious pouncing on DH/DP

TWOT - Two Weeks of Torture!

The link to Part 23 is  <a class="break-all" href="http://www.mumsnet.com/Talk/conception/2063821-Hell-no-Aunt-Flo-You-cant-park-that-red-convertible-here-This-space-is-reserved-Turn-on-tune-in-and-cop-off-Its-Just-Shagging-part-23?" target="_blank">Here</a>

The current Grads Fred is <a class="break-all" href="http://www.mumsnet.com/Talk/antenatal_clubs/1817751-Just-Shagging-Grads-Fred-8-Roll-up-roll-up-all-Viroids-welcome?" target="_blank">here</a>

The rather nobbish article in which we became a little bit notorious is <a class="break-all" href="http://www.independent.co.uk/life-style/health-and-families/health-news/the-dark-side-of-mumsnet-my-shocking-tour-of-the-websites-nether-regions-8905055.html" rel="nofollow" target="_blank">here</a>

Happy shagging shaggers!

It's so weird Lala, I really don't know what to suggest. Especially as you know you didn't ovulate really late. The witch is clearly pissed off with us all lately. No new medication or anything? Maybe the OPK is shit?

Please help, I'm going out of my mind here.

Ttc cycle 2, cycle usually 30 days without fail.

Currently cd26 and just had what May or not be af or implantation bleed? Am I clutching at straws? Do I need a Hooyah?

My af usually short 3days max? But never early?

Tmi but it's not heavy, just noticed on wiping. It's mix red and brown and sticky?

When could I realistically poas just to check? The day I thought the real af was due?

with a normal test yes, but if you wait 5 minutes or so Rpopz will arrive and convince you to use one of her trusty FRERs . I am sure she got a BFP 4 or 5 days early but you definitely should at least be able to do it 2 days early with a FRER I think. Fx for you.

Oooooo interesting kato! Isn't there a certain number of days after implantation to wait? 6 days? So many figures, I lose track!

Don't think I've ever had cystitis either, thankfully. My cat has though! Cat antibiotics aren't fun!

We are all TWOTIng with you then lil! Let us know when you are ready to symptom spot!

Very odd lala. Sounds like you have until he weekend for it to be really out of character though. Fx for the BFP at some point instead!

Oooh yes Kato definitely get a FRER on the case I got mine 5-7 days early

Glad you're keeping upbeat Lala. Must be so bloody frustrating to be in limbo! Weird how AF is screwing everyone around this month... is it the change of weather or something????

Technically average cycle is 31 days so I'm 4 days late if so. Bloody body. Quite down about it - just want to know

Kato and lil fx for bfp xxx

no symptom spotting here dulcet I'm convinced I'm barren so what's the point. I mean that in a totally Zen way. I am really quite chilled about it all. I kinda feel like I'm just waiting for science to have time to put a baby in me now! and in the meantime I'm enjoying the sex again!

kato stay calm. give it 4days I reckon then try a free. fx for you.

lala did you temp or just opks? just wondering if you had surge, didn't ov then surged again but stopped opks so didn't see it. lh doesn't confirm ov fx its just one of those things. maybe book in for a blood test if you get to cd40? fx

lil stay positive - when did you last see doc I can't remember and I think you said on another Fred.

It was opks - maybe you're right, I'll book to see doc next week if still nothing. My boobs hurt and my stomach aches but I did just eat a huge pizza! if I were symptom spotting id mention runny nose and dizziness but I'm not of course that would be naughty

AF just arrived, not due til Sat
No pickled beans for me!
At least I didn't waste any sticks
Still gutted though. Think it's time to visit the docs
Good luck anyone who's still twotting

purple sorry she got you x

I was two days early too. She's messing us all around this month!

lala sorry the witch is being a flange wanker :(

lil your zen is impressive but it is a numbers game, no? Maybe you just need to keep rolling the dice? Obviously still keep things moving with the hsg and other tests at the same time (well not exactly the same time, that could get crowded)

I've recovered from the contraband shock - she probably saw me when she turned round but I don't think she would have been paying attention to what I was holding.

The contraband is messing with my head a bit I know, I know - I Tuesday low fertility, Wednesday night peak fertility?! No flashy face in between. Is that something to worry about? I don't plan to use contraband in the long term, just have a lot of worst case scenarios about my fertility and wanted a bit of reassurance that I'm icing... Instead I am worrying that I have pcos

And sorry purple :(

ayles and purple sorry AF got you.

lala it is so flipping frustrating isn't it? I was 9 days late last month. Although I didn't know when I ovulated so guess ovd late!

I'm officially twotting now... I think.

thanks tabby. we are still trying as much as ever, I'm just not hoping any more! lala we got our referral in Feb. I've had ultrasound and that confirmed all fine. waiting for AF now so I can book hsg. dhs sa's weren't great. after hsg there is an 8wk wait to see consultant.

purple sorry the witch parked up

The witch is being particulary rotten to us all this month! I was clear all night, but a bit of red on wiping mehhhh

Nahhhh it's AF. No doubt.

So what does that mean? I ov'd earlier than usual?

Sorry kato and purple

kato possibly? I was bang on 10dpo the last 4 months, now 18dpo so god knows!!! I'm starting to think witch is a crafty old thing who just likes to mess with our heads.

I just want af to come now and put me out of my misery.

lil fx everything for you

tabby I think contraband can slowly dissolve your soul in a vat of pee over time - flashy face, smiley face, blank face. I hate it - although when starting out it was relief to know SOMETHING was happening at least x

hi ladies, sorry for those of you that the witch got or is messing around

I'm supposed to be twitting however after only doing the deed 3 times this month its going to be extremely unlikely that I'll be pg (miracles would need to happen) so AF expected on the 2nd June, I think I'm on the same cycle as lala?

good news, I am 2 weeks ahead of studies which gives me 2 weeks to do my assignment, its so nice to not be flapping and stressing.

Bad news, I managed to bust my foot this morning by prancing around near a drain then sort of slipped down it and landed on it bruising tendons etc so not allowed to drive until I can perform an emergency stop! typical! its a good job dp is about today :-D

God girls the bloody witch is royally pissing everyone around. Payback for 3 BFPs on the last thread? Sorry to all that she has struck down.

Hope your foot is ok Babble.

Sorry to hear the red convertible has parked up ladies! Silly witch.

On the plus side... Its FRIDAY tomorrow!! Just how bloody long has this week been.

Oooh Babble falling down a drain doesn't sound fun!

Witch is messing me about. Sorry for tmi but bit of clot first thing, bit of dried/old blood since.
Now wondering if it is AF or faint possibility of implantation
Driving myself nuts again!

And thanks for the good wishes. It's helps that you all understand xx

How strange purple. When are you due?