Whether icing, twotting, or in need of a dip in the pity paddling pool, come stroke the friendly orange cave unicorn with us. (Chocolate pretzels are on the house). It's JUST SHAGGING THREAD 17!

[EssieSaysRelax]

Ladies, Fred title says it all; we are the ones who shag as much as our men can cope with in order to get upduffed without the stress of scientific whatnots!

Fred rules (copied from previous Fred)

1. Thou shalt shag as much as humanly possible in order to get upduffed.
   
2. Thou shalt not partake of OPKs, temping, or charting.
   
3. Thou shalt keep symptom spotting to a minimum.
   
4. Thou shalt share and with your fredmates where needed.
   

JSing lingo;

ERTD = Evil Red Tide of Dooooooommmmmmm. Or AF to most others.

Pant snot = Egg white cervical mucus.

Doing a kitten = Getting upduffed soon after joining (warning: may induce in other posters).

Viroid = This is you, dear poster. This is from the first JS thread when someone tried to type 'ladies' and it autocorrected to 'Viroids' - so there you go!

POAS = Pee On A Stick (of the pregnancy detecting kind, not from a tree). Also known as PIAR (Pee In A Ramekin - cos we're posh birds innit). Or PIATLH (Tea light holder) PIAWG (Wine glass) or anything else you care to pee in!

Shagging like something = JSing like a teenage nymphomaniac.

Giving a hooya = Giving a much needed slap to a fellow poster in danger of slipping into ttc obsession.

Contraband = Of COURSE none of us EVER partake of any silly OPKs or temp charting. They are Contraband.

The link to Part 16 is here

The link to the latest grads thread is here

Happy shagging shaggers!

[Alohomora]

CD23 and still no icing, aaargh!

I used to 'party smoke'- so about 20 a year, now it's down to about 5-6 a year whenever we go and see my dad's cousin we have a social one together. OH hates smoking as his parents were total chain smokers - 1-2 packets a day, whether the kids were near or not. He's still pissed off they stopped smoking once he moved out.

At the weekend we had one of those 'MiL, are you for real?' moments - we were talking about babies and pregnancy and MiL blithely informed us that she smoked twice as much during pregnancy because she heard it keeps the baby small and who wants to give birth to a large baby? OH's face was like that ->

I don't even think she was joking. OH is now 6' 4'' so he caught up but jeeze!!!!!

[Redshoes56]

Aloho - I am wearing my [shocked] face too! Wow. That's just...wow!

DH and I have actually talked about how we are going to handle visiting my parents once we have a baby. My mom smokes in the house (much to my father's dismay; he quit years ago) and it makes me sick, so I can't imagine what the smoke would do to a little one's sinuses and lungs. One hurdle at a time, though - gotta get the BFP first ...

[Curly86]

Fifi what are the E-cigs like I'm tempted to try but worried that ill just use it all the time, Ive never smoked inside. As I hate the smell! But with an E-Cig there is no smell I think I would be dangerous!

Glad I'm not the ony smoker :-) pregnancy really doesn't seem like such a good deal, no drink, no smoke, no trampolining :-) lol x

[ZingWantsCake]

aloho

there's no excuse to say something like that, even though I'm pretty sure there was less evidence/research result of just how damaging smoking is to a fetus - presuming your OH is 25-35 years old.

just unbelievable!

if MN existed back then she definitely would have been flamed in AIBU for that!

[ZingWantsCake]

curly true,
but you can look forward to:
nausea and vomiting, anaemia, constipation, heartburn, PSD, leg cramps, itchy skin, scans, stretchmarks, constant exhaustion, stupid questions & birth stories from everyone and their dog, cravings, weight gain, moodswings, blood tests, check ups, bleeding gums, nosebleeds, migraines, endless peeing, backache, broken nights,worrying about baby, seemingly endless waiting after due date has come and gone, nervous diarrhoea, Braxton Hicks, breathes, swollen feet and hands and water retention, carpal tunnel, burning your belly when ironing, dicussing birth options, made to feel like a piece of shit by consultant when she seems to not get that you had no choice but to opt for an ELSC as baby was footling breech, panic buying, packing hospital bag, organizing a "stand by rota" of friends and family as you'll need them to look after other kids, and finally being scared shitless of giving birth (again and again...).

(and despite all of that I consider my pgs were a breeze)

[ZingWantsCake]

noth breathes - breathlessness.

have I just scared you away and killed the thread?

[DulcetMoans]

That's an impressive list there zing but I am not scared away!

Went to the doctors yesterday with DH (weird I have a DH now not a DP!) and have started the process of investigation. She was really nice about it all actually. I have some blood tests lined up and DH has a little pot of his very own to get busy into! I feel better just knowing we are taking some action. She even said many people get pregnant once they start this process anyway so keep going!

[ZingWantsCake]

dulcet good!

especially that I forgot to add the laughing emoticons!

[ZingWantsCake]

oh and well done on taking the first step - although I did smile at DH has his own pot!

have you taken his surname? it took me ages to answer to Mrs... as that is my MIL!
and remembering to write my new surname as signature took even longer!

[Curly86]

zing that doesn't scare me away; some Of those are signs of a healthy pregnancy and I think it would be abnormal not to be shit scared, however I think I fall ino the abnormal category cause I am shit scared of being pregnant and my body changing but the giving birth bit I'm excited about; I'm a control freak and somewhere in my brain it keeps telling me I can control birth :-)

aloho I have a friend who also claimed to smoke while pregnant to keep the birth weight down! I watched a programme that said smoking when pregnant was like standing on the umbilical cord for 30mins which kinda prompted me to stop except for drunken social situations which in fairness aren't many

Me and OH have talked about smoking and I definitely don't want to go back to smoking once we have a child I'm hoping its the final push of encouragement I need

[Alohomora]

Zing OH is mid-forties and I think MiL didn't have much support and/or knowledge when she was pregnant. We're talking rural Ireland in the mid-60ies.

I bought OH contraception vitamins and he laughed - did promise to take them, though!

We're looking at houses atm, we haven't got finance in place yet (still paying stuff off) but this damp house is doing my head - and health - in. Keep your fingers crossed for us, dear shaggers?

[fifi669]

curly I've still gone outside for my plastic cig :) except for one mellow moment on the sofa last night. In all honesty, I miss fags.... I smoke roll ups so the e cig feels pretty chunky and I feel a bit of a tit. Giving it a go though, I do appreciate the fake smoke that you breathe out...

[Curly86]

aloho I've got OH on Zinc tablets its supposed to make his sperms more lively or something! He wasn't impressed but has been a good boy and taken them

fifi you don't have to tell me I love smoking! I miss smoking too but I guess I don't want a small baby that smells funny lol

The worst time is at work when everyone else goes for a smoke and I stay in :-( I had a plastic cigarette that didn't do anything and that helped just to hold and pretend in the early days, my OH doesn't smoke and is really anti smoking

[pizzaqueen]

on the train so don't have time to reply to everyone but I hope you're all doing good cd22 here.

e-cigs aren't as 'safe' as the companies make you believe, they still contain carsonagens (sp?), they're highly addictive and the long term affects are unknown. They're a product of those clever tobacco companies who've realised smoking's not as attractive as it used to be but they want to maintain tgwor profits and keep people addicted. Theyre perhaps a good tool to use to cut down on cigarette smoking but I certainly wouldn't recommend them to anyone who doesn't smoke already. They certainly aren't harmless or clean as the manufacturers would like you to believe.

[Redshoes56]

Aloho - fingers crossed on the house hunt!

dulcet - well done on the doctor visit. I felt like a huge weight was lifted knowing that the process there was started. Give DH, ahem, a hand with "producing the sample" as they put it at my doctor's office.

Keep up the good work on quitting smoking, girls! We'll cheerlead you on.

So the HSG wasn't terrible. The day started with me laughing hysterically, alone, on the bathroom floor trying to give myself the prescribed enema. The test itself was more painful than I expected - more so than AF cramps for sure, the worst being when she inserted the catheter - but it was over pretty quickly. Good news: my tubes are open!

[Alohomora]

You know, thinking about it, being pregnant in Belfast in the 60ies smoking probably was the least likely thing to kill you, so the attitude is almost understandable.

[ZingWantsCake]

pizza spelling is "carcinogens" (adjective is "carcinogenic")

[DulcetMoans]

Thanks red. It does feel better. My doctor didn't suggest me helping out (hubby did though! haha) but she did give us the delightful details that it had to go directly into the cup, not dripped in from me. Her words, not mine! I wouldn't have even considered that!

I am surprised there are so many smokers, mainly because I know so few in real life. I think I have maybe three friends that smoke. I've often found that odd but just seems to be the group of friends I have. I grew up in a smoking household though, probably put me off a little. Tried it once - never again.

[Bearfacedchic]

I hardly know any smokers. Probably about 4 or 5 from the same group. I smoked for a bit while trying to rebel at about 16 - maybe like 2 weeks but it was too expensive and smelly. Plus I have asthma so gave it up quick smart. I hate it now.

Glad the HSG was ok Red. Hurrah for open tubes!

Well done Dulcet on going to docs. Hope it all goes well. I tried to help but it just didn't happen so left DH to it in the bathroom.

Crazy about the keeping the baby weight small comment Some people!

CD 24 here. Not sure of any symptoms as been too busy with work. Feel knackered though!

[lil1ady]

Evening everyone.

our second wedding anniversary today so been out for a lovely meal tonight. feeling rather full!

the smoking baby weight thing is awful but I can't say it surprises me. I'm sure there are ppl out there now who would do it despite all if the advice.

glad the Dr took you seriously dulcet fx for the law of sod to throw a bfp ur way now.

red yay for clear tubes! and for getting slightly further down the path to answers.

feel in limbo here, cd33 11dpo. don't think a bfp is on its way. unusual things so far from the symptom spotting cave, I've had a bit of acid reflux the last couple of days. I never get this. also symptoms I don't have. I normally get a tingling sensation in my nipples after icing for about a week but haven't had it at all. breadsticks not at all sore and no bigger so pretty sure the witch will show on Saturday. I just feel like the whole TTC thing is completely draining me emotionally. work is crap ATM too and I just feel like Im in limbo in life in general. I dont want to change jobs because I might get upduffed, but if I don't get upduffed I'm stuck working for these morons.

sorry for the me me me post. thanks for letting me get it off my chest though. dont like all these feelings

[pizzaqueen]

red great news about the clear tubes. Hope fully that's one less thing for you to worry about. I bet you'll get your bfp during all these tests because that's the law of sod.

lil1ady I started ny last job 5 months pregnant. It wasn't a big deal (except not being entitled to mat pay) I took a year off in the end. They were really iffy about me coming back part time and not working late when I had ds to pick up but that's bevause they were twats not because it was a new job. Just got for it, you can't put everything on hold. Law of sod says youll accept bew job and get bfp next day.

I'm cd22 and getting lots of creamy white cm...never noticed this before

[lil1ady]

Thanks pizza I know it isn't impossible to do. but its against my make-up (did I mention I'm an accountant, you know, the boring stuffy don't take any risks type people). I actually want to start up my own practice because I'm a control freak and don't like working for other people so it seems sensiblke to stick where I am until after we have kids. plus I think if I did it now my age might scare off potential clients as im young compared to those generally in charge in the industry. just sucks to be stuck in the office dealing with the crap while they swan around in flash cars and go on nice holidays.

you have also reminded me I've had more creamy cm this week too. seems to be tailing off now though. hope its a sign for us

[fifi669]

lil I'm an accountant too! We're secretly the cool profession....

[lil1ady]

haha Fifi yay! with you there our office is full of fun ppl who go out together and get drunk/have a laugh. not a boring accountant in sight..until you see the guys running the joint!

[ZingWantsCake]

I wonder if I should start a new fred.

anyone planning to?

where are you all?