Whether icing, twotting, or in need of a dip in the pity paddling pool, come stroke the friendly orange cave unicorn with us. (Chocolate pretzels are on the house). It's JUST SHAGGING THREAD 17!

[EssieSaysRelax]

Ladies, Fred title says it all; we are the ones who shag as much as our men can cope with in order to get upduffed without the stress of scientific whatnots!

Fred rules (copied from previous Fred)

1. Thou shalt shag as much as humanly possible in order to get upduffed.
2. Thou shalt not partake of OPKs, temping, or charting.
3. Thou shalt keep symptom spotting to a minimum.
4. Thou shalt share and with your fredmates where needed.

JSing lingo;

ERTD = Evil Red Tide of Dooooooommmmmmm. Or AF to most others.

Pant snot = Egg white cervical mucus.

Doing a kitten = Getting upduffed soon after joining (warning: may induce in other posters).

Viroid = This is you, dear poster. This is from the first JS thread when someone tried to type 'ladies' and it autocorrected to 'Viroids' - so there you go!

POAS = Pee On A Stick (of the pregnancy detecting kind, not from a tree). Also known as PIAR (Pee In A Ramekin - cos we're posh birds innit). Or PIATLH (Tea light holder) PIAWG (Wine glass) or anything else you care to pee in!

Shagging like something = JSing like a teenage nymphomaniac.

Giving a hooya = Giving a much needed slap to a fellow poster in danger of slipping into ttc obsession.

Contraband = Of COURSE none of us EVER partake of any silly OPKs or temp charting. They are Contraband.

The link to Part 16 is here

The link to the latest grads thread is here

Happy shagging shaggers!

Congratulations downstairs and where!

Details needed! How many cycles did it take? Symptoms etc?

Congratulations Wheredidmyyouthgo!

Tis the month of the BFP! All that warm summer evening JSing!

Thank you thank you am soooo pleased!

Symptoms...
3dpo - sore boobs when I took my bra off at night
4dpo - sore boobs through the day
5dpo - had a really vivid nightmare overnight, and sore boobs in the morning
7dpo - heightened sense of smell (kitchen/bathroom), vivid dream overnight. Smells worse in the evening. Sore boobs morning and evening.
8dpo - woke up feeling sick. Hungry in the evening, supper (fish) tasted smoked - it wasn't. Very tired in the evening.
9dpo - woke up feeling sick. Had vivid dream overnight, and woke in the middle of the night to wee. Pregnancy test showed the faintest of BFP!!! Still feeling nauseous at lunchtime, hungry but don't fancy anything to eat, exhausted, worried I've got so much work to do and am just so very tired.

So much good news!! Big hurrah for Coffee, Downstairs (I knew it!!), and Where Awesome ladies!
Zing - your logic is flawed! You're not TTC, but you're on our TTC thread as mascot anyway, so you can't bugger off now you ARE TTC!!
I am an unhappy TWOTter still, 9dpo, PIAR today, predictable BFN. Totally psyching myself out as per usual.

Hello, hello, hello all! I'm back from the hols. Had a lovely week with DH not thinking about Ttc! Took me ages to read the Fred. Hope you're all well.

So, congrats to Downstairs, KitKat, Coffee and Where! Good work from you all. Sorry if I missed anyone, but well done duffers!

Stick around Zing. We just got used to you!

Well, I definitely ov'd this month and we shagged several times during the fertyl mertyl period. So now I'm in the TWOT and early tester that I am, did one today and got a bfn. I'm on cd28, so unlikely this month I think.

We got the copy of the letter explaining our 'case histories' and next course of action to the GP and the bit about me says that my blood tests show evidence of regular ovulation. DH's sperm is a different matter but of course thats being ignored and I'm still being prodded and poked although I know it's necessary I still have to go in for a HSG scan this month which basically means there won't be any Ttc for us next month as you can't be pregnant and they advise to wait until after your next period. Also, really not looking forward to the scan. Really wish everything was a bit easier somehow.

So, all in all, a bit poo really, but there we are. Such is life. And I feel like giving up. I'm dive-bombing that pity pool, so watch out!

Now I feel bad as on the other Fred there are people going through all sorts of trauma and I feel very stoopid.

hi bear we missed you!

only a little hooya to urself please - just because other ppl had it worse doesn't mean what Ur going thru isn't tough. but at least things are moving along towards them bothering to look at Ur dh

oops I forgot to say congrats to where so congrats!

and hi to everyone else

morning all.

congrats to you where yay!

I'd much rather stay, thanks ladies!
I just don't want to upset anyone, that's all!

we are off to seaside today. I don't normally drive that long so I'm worried about getting too tired for journey home. feel like canceling, , but don't want to disappoint the kids
[scaredycat]

glad you have decided to stay zing please keep us updated on how your ttc is going. I'm still officially only on cycle one too!! Hoping it won't take too long, given ds was a pill baby but never know.

enjoy the seaside. have a nice big coffee or red bull before the drive home, open the windows and plan a stop or two if you need it.

where and downstairs... Awesome news girls!
zing, don't go kid, we all live to hear of people getting their BFPs!

Nothing new here at minions, ERTD has vacated but I'm on night shift after night shift so haven't as much looked at oh as opposed to throwing him a pity shag, note to self, must try harder!

Wow! Yay for the BFPs. Go girls. V good news. Keep the details coming.

Bear, glad you had a nice hol. Don't feel bad or stoopid, thats what we're all here for, getting it all off your chest to make RL a bit easier to cope with! I've been doing my fair share of offloading cos I'm not coping brilliantly atm either.

Zing DON'T GO! You can't start ttc and leave us hanging! I sincerly hope it does happen swiftly for you, and even if you do a kitten we'd still like you to be here to tell us about it. Enjoy the sea side too.

My fertle week supposedly starts on Monday, no shagging has taken place yet as I've felt utterly crap though the cramps and spotting has stopped now. Hoping to get the cape on tonight and keep it on til long after the app advises cos judging by last few cycles I have a wacky literal phase!

I can't stop eating chocolate either, though apparently cocoa keeps dementia at bay I heard on the radio this morning?

Excellent news on the benefits if chocolate essie, thanks for that!

And even better news on all the BFPs coming in. I must be at the wrong end of the Fred's cycle as only on CD9 so no chance of a BFP for weeks!!

Same here dulcet, I'm cd11. See you at the synchro-pee!!

Congratulations where

What does cd and dpo mean?

I suddenly remembered this morning (while dtd of all times...) that I have a tilted womb and read years ago about this making it more difficult to conceive - anyone else had this?

cd7 here so count me in for synchro pee too. ertd has vacated so cape us coming out soon.

Maggie CD is cycle day dpo is days past ovulation.

not heard of the tilted womb thing but sounds odd. wonder if different positions for DTD could help?

CD9 here too.
Love having a synchro pee buddy!

I was told in my smear I had a tilted cervix? Which apparently does make it a little harder and why all my period pain is in my back and up my bum...nice

I had never heard of tilted womb/cervix (not sure which it was) until my pregnant friend told me she had it. They were worried it would stop them getting pregnant as she had been told it could but she did first go. Don't have any medical evidence but from the one person I know that had it there wasn't a problem.

Thanks for the explanation :)

I think it was because it made it difficult for the sperm to get in?

Auntie I've got a tilted uterus - never knew about it and no problems conceiving. Only found out when they mentioned it at my 8 week scan!

I missed you and all the shaggedy chit-chat too!

I have heard of a tilted womb. I thought it meant that some women might bleed a little after sex because the womb gets a bit knocked or something like that. I think that's what I read. Apart from that, I know nothing - sorry. Does it cause you any discomfort or pain, Maggie?

We had a horrid moment while on hols when two parents (maybe grandparents?) who were 'looking after' two small children decided it would be better for them to tuck into their steak rather than watch the children and a little boy aged probably about 18 months nearly fell in the river. They were nowhere near him and the dad/granddad did come running over, but if he had fallen in, there would have been no saving him. The boy could have easily fitted through or run through the safety barriers as he was so small. He got right up to the edge and thankfully stopped just before it. There was a collective gasp from everyone eating at the restaurant and I was so angry that I gave my best evils to the mother/grandmother. It just made me so angry that they could be so blasé about such small children. DH said he would have had to jump in if the boy had fallen in, but then both the boy and DH would have drowned! The worst thing was that the parents didn't seem at all bothered by what happened and we saw them the next day doing pretty much the same thing.

Anyway, apart from that, we had a lurvely time. I'm off again next week, but I may be able to fit in that trip to the unicorn farm with Essie. So, I was thinking that maybe we could buy a female unicorn (as the one we have is clearly male) and breed them! Just shagging unicorns! Project!

Hi sorry I've been a bit MIA - been really busy doing nothing!

Congrats to all the BFPers! How many are we up to this thread? Anyone keeping count?

I'm on CD13, so if I can hold off, I will synchro pee too

No other news here really apart from going out tonight to a "pudding night" its salad followed by 6 puddings and some kind of entertainment with the girls! I love pudding!

we had a lovely day at the beach!

I was so careful making sure the kids were suncreamed upto their eyeballs I forgot to do me!
my neck is a lovely lobster colour-ouch!

thank you, I'll stay, you are all so sweet!