30s TTC: Back to school at BESHory Towers. For spiffing gels who've been TTC since before rationing ended and find conception harder than Double Latin, chiz . What ho!

[Scorpette]

Come along, we haven't got all day. Pop off your blazers and straw boaters for a mo and listen up. As Head Girl, I think you ought to know that my dear chum Darrell Rivers tells me that we're really letting the side down with our lack of baybee-winning. To that end, instead of prep and lacrosse, we'll be TTC. I know some of us are losing hope that we'll ever win the Motherhood Cup for our house, but chins up and think of England! We don't won't to end up like the bitter, childless, dried-up old spinsters running this place, do w... oh, hello Matron! Yes, yes, we're going now...

Super! We've been given the attic dorm - bagsy the bed by the window, what! We won't be disturbed when we're enjoying midnight feasts, unbridled lesbianism, pillow fights and sneaking in fellows from the nearby boy's school for some ghastly dreadfulness.

So let's pop some Joyce Grenfell on the gramophone and crack open the tuck boxes! Mater's made me a huge ginger cake and oooh, I see someone's brought pontefract cakes! Yummo! Humbugs, sherbet, elderflower fizz, eccles cakes, a whole slab of choccy - what a simply smashing haul! Hmmm, this ginger beer smells suspiciously gin-like...

Oh yes

Morning BESHlets.

Have posted on other fred asking hmc & forza to keep that discussion in AIBU. I come to the Palais to discuss other shiz.

Talking of which salad... I seem to be a bit futher along the FC route than you. I've had HSG, Clomid prescribed (even though everything suggests I ov) & the boyf has JIAP. I've requested this appointment. My questions are along the lines of:

1. I've taken 3 months of Clomid & all its done is mess up cycles (reduce by about 1 week & dry up pant snot). Pliz to explain.
2. I've had day 21 bloods to check progesterone level, but not days 3 & 21 to check FSH & L- the other one. Pliz to explain.
3. The boyf JIAP - only one sample. First told it was on slightly lower than average side, next appointment told it was great. Pliz to explain.
4. My bloods & boyf JIAP done over 1 year ago - should they be repeated?
5. Clarify CD1. If I need to take Clomid from days 2 - 6 I need to know when CD1 is. If I go from 0 - full droid midday. Pliz explain.
6. 12 months ago (first FC appointment) we were told we'd be put onto IUI & IVF waiting lists IMMEDIATELY due to the length of waiting list. IUI was 9 - 12 months, so that should mean we're top of the list about now. Pliz to explain.
7. I take various vitamins (nowt crazy) which say if you're planning to become diffed consult doc. When I originally came off the pill I went to docs. He did look like a work experience kid, who blushed when I mentioned "pill" & said my vitamins weren't a problem. Is this true?
8. Do they think my weight is a serious factor?
9. Is there ANYTHING else that we can do to help process along?

10. WHERE THE FECKING FECK IS MY BAYBEE?

Feel free to pick through any of these questions for your own appointment. Can I be a know-it-all-after-the-event? If its your first FC appointment, don't do a laurie & get all excited that they must be all knowing so sit there nodding & not asking a single question. I just feel cross with myself that another year has crept by & I haven't really been assertive enough. But that's a whole other problem which has blighted my, oh entire life .

Meanwhile I think some of my famous gin-soaked donuts are in order. Anyone?

Lozza They all sound like highly sensible questions - especially #10.

Lettice Am back at work after holiday. Don't feel like working. Am shit employee atm - too much time on MN, not enough actually doing my job. Therefore grumpy.

MrsFC My brain has gone quite literal and I wondered why on earth you would SWI through a window.

Gin-soaked doughnuts. Excellent.

drom fanks . How the devil are you? I'm a rubbish employee too - & have no holiday or diffment to excuse me

Oh dear drom post holiday blues are shit :( but sure you re PERFECT employee despite time wasted spent on MN, is important that you spend time on here for your sanity, they wouldn't want a crazed employee would they?

thanks lozzer this is my 2nd FC appointment but its only been 2 months I think because I am so ancient they are fast tracking me. But yeah wish i had been more prepared the first time as would have demanded HSG etc as all they did was send me for more day 3 and day 21 (which doc had already had done) so not much further on. I know i am oving cos of charting etc. At that point we hadn't had JIAP results back tho so that is on the list, full explanation as docs just said 'not very good' which is 'not very helpful' imo. (although i have researched his results myself i want corroboration) On that front they should DEFO send your man for more, one test is not conclusive apparently and up to 3 are recommended to get an accurate picture so i would insist on that if i were you.

I expect they will recommend i go on clomid as the next step although not sure what the point is as i am ovulating already. that will be another one of my questions. I also want reassure the boy that i will not have a 2 headed baby from fertility drucks. Plus i want to find out about time lines re IVF versus my age (39 in feb) as i dont want to fanny about and then get refused. Funny as i really wasn't sure i wanted it only a few months ago but now there is a chance i wont get the choice i am a bit more up for it (perverse i know)

MrsFC yes is no problem at the beginning of week long Operation Impregnation as i am due to ov next thursday (day of FC appointment) so i am hoping to pull of a famous BESH FC sponsored last minute diff.

sorry was a bit mememe that one.

got needling later too scorps we will both be picture of serenity this evening no? are you having general chill out needles as well as baby promising ones?

skills on the flatter tum fyibtwbbq

Tee hee, norty Scorps woz deleted by the Babylon!

I have asked for the post linking to this thread to be removed on the grounds that 99% of what we talk about has nothing to do with anyone in AIBU or that thread and although i realise this is a public forum, I feel that anyone deliberately seeking out the Conception forum is more likely to be sympathetic to our plight. I don't know if that will happen or not.

scorps i realise you are upset and i do agree with your point about double standards but i don't think you are going to win that argument with those particular people and you are more likely to draw even more attention to this thread. I just don't think its worth bothering over to be honest. Come back over here and have some ginger beer and a cucumber sandwich (crusts cut off).

Goodness. Sorry for opening a can of worms everyone. I'm genuinely surprised that someone sticking up for me all nicely and politely i.e. my lovely pals Salty and Scorps (ok perhaps less politely ) there has resulted in such nastiness. And I haven't even been over there yet. Not sure if I want to, to be honest :(. Ever so sorry to inadvertently let some hyenas in. Again :(

Ooops, sorry scorps didn't realise you were snitched on...we'll not be inviting those girls to our next midnight feast!

Um, please non-BESHes don?t come in here to be mean ? we?re all going through some really hard shit at the moment. Please keep it to the other threads. Thanks muchly.

SaladDressing I had my next installment of needles this morning and I have felt on a different planet all morning. Seriously, I?m having difficulty typing properly as I?m so spaced out. I?m thinking evening sessions may be more productive to my work!

Good luck for the multi-FC appointments next week. Salad ? I was already ovulating but had 6 rounds of Clomid (round 4 was successful). It can balance out your hormones and also act as a ?reset? to the reproductive system, and lengthen Luteal Phase, so it?s a good starting place even if you do ovulate. It can improve the quality and quantity of eggs you release each month so gives you more bites of the cherry so to speak. If you are getting good monitoring from Dildocam or blood tests it can also help time ovulation more accurately so you know that your timings are bang on.

Lorry you need to have your FSH and LH tested (as you know) and these need to be done in the same cycle. If you ovulate late usually then the 21 day test should be slightly later (it should be 7 days after ovulation). JIAP will probably need repeating as results can vary hugely between tests. My clinic will not let you have IUI or IVF if your BMI is over 28 I think? There are lots of forms to fill in to get permission for funding for IUI and IVF too, if that?s the route you are going. You will also need up to date blood tests (I had several redone and some more swabs I think?) and it will probably take a month or two before you get in the loop. Best of luck ? all your questions sound very sensible to me.

I had some spotting today (CD25) which I don?t normally get. This means either implantation (hah!) or droid. Both are fairly exciting prospects as far as I?m concerned ?

Good luck Lorry my love.

cho

scorps step away from the other fred. Come serve your detention here Breakfast Club style & regale us with your wit.

salad their reason for giving me Clomid despite evidence showing I ov was to make me "super-fertile". Yeah, that worked . Are you taking the boy with you to FC? My boyf said about coming along but I've said I'm happy to go alone. I think its me who has more questions I want answered, the boyf is just happy SWI. Plus despite 14 years together I'm not sure he's ready for my possible FC Meltdown.

Ooh x-posts. scorps I didn't know you were snitched on either. Nice bunch.

aries thanks for the good luck. I have another week to work on my questions list. Worry not about letting non-BESH's in, its just reinforced my love for all troo BESH's, PESH's & FESH's & think how lucky we are to have found a fantabulous bunch of gals!

barbie thanks also for your information on my questions. Think I sawa leaflet about BMI last time I was in FC - they stated BMI over 30 as an issue. I'm borderline - & obviously so - but no-one has mentioned it. Amazing how it changes around the country, non?

Ooo, Beaver , fingers crossed for implantationing!

I haz CBFM! Woop! Now I haz question. On the front of the box it says: improves chances of conception by 89%!!!111!!! As opposed to what, pray tell? Not Shagging at all? Shagging in incorrect orifice?

Okay I have no idea. But it's got to be good, right?

Scorps hugs and a punch on the nose for you. Hope the needling is good.

Lorryload of Questions Pass me one of them thar gin-soaked doughnuts pls. Excellent list btw, I always have to write all my questions down before I go to see medical people as I've found as soon as I step through the door I get the WhiteCoatFear and my brain goes completely irretrievably blank. So now I just wave the list at them and gibber instead, it's easier.

Scorps thank you for being supportive of fellow students, sorry you got detention.

Have a glass bottle of my cranberry gin fizz, and put all that anger energy into this afternoons game against the Lower Sixth.

Messmaker here has lost her lacross shirt, and I have already checked the flag pole. [wanders round dorm topless] wonder if they'd let me play in just my bra.

ok thanks for the info/reassurance, hmm super fertile, that sounds good? lozloz yep the boy is coming along, he didn't come to the first one and as we are going to get the low down on his jizz test i think its important he is there. Also last time the waiting room was a bit of a task on my own being full of heavily diffed people, and he is the master of distraction and laughter making.

barbarian good news re droid, i will of course be holding out for the former explanation. :o

i meant good news re 'spotting' doh!

owlshoes ROFLAO at 89%, reminds me of the 99% Fat Free candyfloss, and 97% sugar free butter {Lies, dam lies, and statistics}

Whenever I go to medical appointments I purposely sit on my hands for fear of actually dislocating a finger (or 3) cus I fidget soo much. Did write a list once, then fiddled with it in the waiting room and the bloody thing near enough disintergrated on me.
might use that excuse for my lack of geography homework.

Yo blabby hagelinos. Saladitis do not be bricking it, shurelly they cannot revoke the referrals that have already been made? The consultant wasn't there last time, was s/he? I do not have much smartly suggestions. I guess wait and see what they tell you about bloods (clever, I know). I received a letter that the clinic sent to my GP and they said they did HSG on me in view of CH's less than perfect JIAP results. Ie. in anticipation of IUI. It sounds like, in your case, they still need to determine if it is you or him, right? I personally, and this is a personal view that I am happy to change in different circumstances, am not a fan of random "not sure what the problem is, but hey, let's give you some drucks" approach. I also think I am a step in between you and LaurelLeaf, but, knock on wood, looks like the problem is his, not even so bad, jizz. Though I have a fibroid I would like to enquire about.

I do have to say that my investigations sound more thorough than Laurel's, so maybe make sure you have them all before they prescribe stuffs. Like, day 3 bloods, etc. Which actually you have had, so forget. Looks like they are doing it all by the book with you. You need to ask for dildocam, non? So I would say the basics are: day 3 and 21 tests, diseases for both of you, dildocam and JIAP. Maybe HSG. They also did, I think, thyroid and some other hormone-related tests on me, but can't quite remember. Oh and GP did sugar levels because I "looked fat" . They came back perfect, thank you very much freak-who-replaced-my-nice-GP. But apparently diabetes and such can cause difficulties.

If his white goods are not working and you are all cool, no need for clomid, I think. Check this. Actually, all the BESHies may be intereseted.

Where are you, up norf?

Luella'sFosterCarer why was your post brutally deleted?

Now who's blabbing?

well my perspective would be that we need to rule out that its not BOTH of us? I mean just cos his goods are bit defunkt doesn't mean i also don't have a problem? I could be ovulating but have crap eggs or blocked tubes or whatevs, i'd like to rule that out NOW rather than wait until we have fixed the fridge and THEN find out. I would hope that would also be the consultants thinking too but who knows.

And no they can't revoke the refferal but the consultant can say i am too old for this and that? I am worried they will be very results driven and decide that the treatment would be better spent on someone younger and therefore more likely of success.

thanks for the link mountie

Wow, what a couple of true bullies on that other thread. I wholeheartedly agree with Gin's comments about women bitching against each other and how damaging it is, would post on their but too scaredy cat and a bit fragile. Shows yet again how bloody fantastically supportive the BESHies are again though....smiley face for you all :)

Good luck for FC appointments next week laydeez...sounds like each hospital works differently as all your tests etc. are being done at different times, or maybe it isn't the one size fits all approach that I seem to think it is!

I nearly burst into tears whilst in the queue at the co-op this morning because their was a new mum in front of me. I need to get a grip as feel like I'm totally losing the plot.

salad my love...my FC clinic Dr really upset me the first time we went as he just seemed interested in Mr T's drinking habits (not much btw) rather than looking at the issue. When speaking to the very nice fertility nurse afterwards she said that treatement is up to the patient...so in our case that meant that if we wanted to jump staright to IVF and miss out IUI we could, it was our decision (although would concede all IUI treatments by doing this so we didn't - 4 goes at something is better than 1 go, non? Well not sure right now but never mind...). This was news to me and I suppose what I'm saying in my long winded fashion is that you should be able to ask to be checked out...I felt the same that I hoped for natural conception and knew this would never happen if there was something wrong with me they didn't know about. Sooooooo, fight your corner as I think it's prefectly reasonable that you should get full investigations. After all the jizz ishoo can be resolved a la Mr T.

Pile on!!! feel better?

thanks for that link hopon it would seem that no HSG until jizz and my blood test come back so i expect i will get it next time.

oh cool. thanks for the tartles i am going to ask about my age and if there is a chance that at some point i might be refused IVF because of it. (adds to list)