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Our guests are hinting that they are going to stay longer than wanted ! How to find the words?

686 replies

Duvetdaysaregood · 27/12/2022 23:05

Guests invited until tomorrow. Been here since 23 rd with general idea to go between c mas and new year.

Heard one lot say to another , oh how long are you staying.? . they replied ..oh maybe till the new year. ..

I could not just holler .. what ..?? From a distance across kitchen.

So , said to them later , what did you say about stating longer .. ? They shrugged it off and changed the subject
I said i needed to know . Evasive .

I repeated that we needed to know for food etc and they just said oh well we could get food .

I have had this before and struggled .we live in a beautiful area of natural beauty where people go on holiday and they do relax .

anyone had this before ? If so , do I need to directly say please leave ..and if so how ! Without causing offence ?
They know
us well and I am struggling to ask them to go . If i say we have other guests due , ( a lie and dont want to lie ) I think they would just say oh no problem , we can all muck in , offer to sleep on camp bed if bo room .. I jusy want ghem to go .

OP posts:
Duvetdaysaregood · 02/01/2023 20:30

I need to re build confidence and be less discombobulated in his presence .. get a sense of ease in my own home
back , in order to begin to address.

OP posts:
WinterDeWinter · 02/01/2023 20:33

Absolutely. He is, after all, just another child (though not one who is your problem).

Duvetdaysaregood · 03/01/2023 14:20

Wow ! Well put .. that he is still a child . That really helped as i can have both power amd some compassion of sorts!

OP posts:
Hullyhuman · 08/01/2023 21:45

www.facebook.com/reel/464989055804306?fs=e&s=TIeQ9V
😂

Timeforachangeisitnot · 09/01/2023 07:33

Hullyhuman · 08/01/2023 21:45

Love it 😂

pristinesurfacesGBTD · 09/01/2023 09:29

Duvetdaysaregood · 31/12/2022 11:56

I know ! What shall i do !? I think we mahy have. Lits of ‘ visitors’ !

The answer when he /they invite themselves is :

Oh, No thank you (big smile) that doesn't work for us (change the subject)

Ay least you're ready for it, forewarned etc. Practice saying it out loud, it really helps 😊

Uninterestedfamily · 23/01/2023 12:02

I think you need to gently break your Dds (and his) mindset that this is still her home. You said she still has lots of belongings there... Why? Does she still have 'her' bedroom? Time to tell her she needs to collect the rest of her stuff as you are turning that room (not 'your bedroom') into a proper guest room/office/hobby room/sex dungeon) and redecorate it and change furniture if you can.

Uninterestedfamily · 23/01/2023 12:04

And ask for her key back, say one of you has lost yours and as she doesn't need it any more, it would be silly to buy a replacement.

MyfavouriteisA · 24/01/2023 17:10

The OP has posted a second thread under a new username:
www.mumsnet.com/talk/am_i_being_unreasonable/4726412-our-guests-are-hinting-they-wont-leave-continued-thread?page=14&reply=123352209

billy1966 · 25/01/2023 19:22

The OP hasn't pulled it.

MyfavouriteisA · 26/01/2023 16:51

Oops wrong link, sorry, here’s the new thread:

www.mumsnet.com/talk/am_i_being_unreasonable/4726412-our-guests-are-hinting-they-wont-leave-continued-thread?page=1

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