The 2022 Poncetastic Christmas Thread

[VivaJen]

Welcome to the 2022 Poncetastic thread. With a nod to Fellatio (wherever she may be) at the stroke of midnight, let the poncing commence.

"OK, first of all, I know it's still September by we need to start this thread now because as you all know, having a truly Poncetastic Christmas involves precision planning, strategy, bravery, heroics, and frequently martyrdom.

So, if you, like me, actually want to make the next twelve weeks of your life a misery by hand-crafting your cards, finding a huge bucket for Nigella's turkey in brine, pickling pears, shrivelling oranges in a low oven for those rustic au naturel decorations, dragging half a holly bush back from the woods, and just generally being a smug annoying jobs worth ponce, join me on this thread.

Feel free to post photos of previous tree-trimming, cake icing or table centrepiece triumphs, discuss this year's bauble colour themes, debate the merits of Delia versus Gordon, road-test a selection of canapés and cocktails, (all in the line of duty) and link to lovely inspirational photos/craft ideas for a truly Poncetastic Christmas.

Warning: If your idea of a good Christmas involves Pizza, ITV, gravy granules or anything with 'Aunt Bessie’s' on the packet, this is not the thread for you".

Morning poncers! Very impressed by the all of the poncing so far. I've mostly been lurking this year, but this morning I settled in with my eleven Christmas magazines and wrote many lists: presents (all adults, all difficult), decorations, food, events, etc. Mincemeat planned for tomorrow.

@HannahDefoesTrenchcoat
gorgeous dog!
so picturesque by the fire.

I'm not sure if this is true poncing, but today I have made the red cabbage (Delia's recipe) ready to freeze for Christmas!

If you're planning on serving them up to other people, why the hell not? Quality control is essential. or you can ask your mum for a trial cake on top of the proper one...

Absolutely counts, you can get extra ponce points if you grow the red cabbage yourself 😁

Absolutely @OrigamiOwls I made Delia’s recipe too this week and counting it as a win - except I didn’t then make a test batch of mince pies as the freezer was full of cabbage . Booo!

I’ve started making a dried pear loaf from Advent by Anya Dunk.

I’ve chopped up dried pears, figs and prunes and they are soaking in tea overnight. It sounds like a version of Barabrith/tea bread.

She says once it’s cooked to wrap and leave for at least a week, preferably 2 or 3. That’s going to be hard…

Ok @Trumpton I have put my pebbles into the vases and added water... should my paperwhite bulbs be slightly in the water or should there be a gap between the water level and the bulbs?! Help! 😂

I'm very excited about the latest bit of poncing chez the Meandering household. Our house opens straight onto the street and at the front of the house is our dining room with a large window overlooking the pavement outside. Years ago, when we were working and cash comfortable but time poor, we thought it would be a great idea to have a model Christmas Village that passers-by could look at through the window. So, we invested in a load of Lemax buildings and bits and pieces, but then never got round to doing it. Now we are both retired so we're cash poor and time rich and we're actually doing it! The DH has been building a construction to put the village on. I am in charge of making a background sky with twinkly stars. Then we'll both have fun arranging the village. I'm absurdly excited about this! The plan is to have it ready for December 1st, so I'll post pictures then.

Someone was asking about ways to hang a wreath without damaging a new front door. I noticed that they've got some door wreath hangers in The Range. The ones with the red gonk and the ones with the stag's head are £7.99 and the ones like candy canes are £2.99. Alternatively, there are plain ones in Home Bargains for 99p.

Your Christmas village sounds amazing. Can't wait to see the pictures

@Confusedmeanderings that sounds like assume excellent poncing!

@VivaJen alas I did not grow the cabbage myself! But I'm glad to hear it counts towards my 2022 poncing!

Snowflake

For the poster who wanted to ponce up a holiday cottage, these snowflakes from Wilko are great. If you are careful they last year after year. I hang them from my stair garland and they look really pretty.

This thread soothes my soul. I’m a lurker with poncetastic envy.

@kiwi17
Just to the base of the Paperwhite bulbs. You don’t need to drown them.
Give them 2 weeks or so in a cool room not dark then check.
These are mine with date stamps.

That's me! Thank you, those are great. There's a staircase in the cottage that those would work on too.

@Trumpton thank you! Here's hoping they don't die!

I picked our medlars today for a Nigel Slater recipe (going to be one small jar of jelly I fear).
Feeling Very Nigel and faintly medieval!
NB Nigel-esque photography 😉

Love it!!! Could easily see this in the OFM

Thanks @VivaJen! Around it, out of frame, chaos reigned on the dining room table lol

@Dillidilly ooh wow! I'd love to have a medlar tree!

We planted it in 2020...bought from a local nursery. Last year it only produced about 4 medlars, this year 10 usable ones.
It's really my DH's project: he was inspired after we were given a jar of homemade medlar jelly, which is delicious.

We went on a mission in the charity shops in town today to find a mirrored tray for the alcohol shelf but, there was nothing to be had 😢 so I have been hunting on Vinted & come across these two - I've asked both sellers how wide they are before I buy one.

I've seen a couple of small wreaths, and some inexpensive lights too, that I'm going to buy next week to go on there. And nanna has three or four sets of ladders so I'm pinching one of those and sending the girls' dad in the loft to locate what I kept of my vintage glass collection!

So, not entirely productive, but I have a plan for the corner at least & am quite happy with that. Oh, I found my spirit measure too, not that it gets used but it can live there now instead of the back of the drawer 🤣

Dd1's fully embracing the seasonal fruits on the market and has already decided we'll make cranberry sauce again. She picked chestnuts up today so now I have a net of those to roast...I'm not entirely sure what to do with them 🤷‍♀️ or if I even like them...but, we'll see!

I can't remember who posted about the Christmas village but it sounds amazing (may have been on the CC thread maybe 🤔) I do hope you'll post pictures when it's done 🎄