Active discussions

Meet the Other Phone. Flexible and made to last.

Meet the Other Phone.
Flexible and made to last.

Buy now

Please or to access all these features

Talk
Childbirth

Share experiences and get support around labour, birth and recovery.

Original poster

Episiotomies aren't all that bad

151 replies

Mummy2014 · 02/02/2014 18:09

I'm a first time mummy & tearing / being cut was such a worry & a concern for me, that it almost had me asking for a C Section.

However, my baby boy was delivered via ventouse 13 days ago & I needed an episiotomy. As soon as the consultant walked in - I PANICKED!! But, there really wasn't any need, after being numbed "down there" he cut & my boy was delivered.

Whilst it wasn't pleasant in the slightest, and the first 2/3 days were very sore, overall it wasn't as bad as I had expected. 13 days later my stitches have dissolved & after a sneaky peak, everything looks back to normal (although I'm fully aware more healing is required!)

I just wanted to share my experience & reassure people that it really isn't that bad & try not to worry if you can help it.

I know this isn't the case for everyone, but just wanted to share my experience.

Xx

OP posts:
minipie · 02/02/2014 18:25

I totally agree.

I was also really worried and desperate to avoid tearing/being cut. But when it came to it I actually ASKED for an episiotomy because DD was stuck right at the exit point and I was too exhausted to push harder. It was over very quickly, didn't hurt as I recall (quick sting while I was numbed) and healed very quickly. I don't even remember it being sore afterwards.

I actually wish they'd done it sooner as poor dd might have got a bit less squished (she had a very squished face and wasn't breathing at birth, though seems ok now!)

elQuintoConyo · 02/02/2014 19:33

A pure reaction to your thread title: woopee-doo-for-you.

My son is 2.2, I still have:

  • pain during sex, badly
  • pain trying to use my mooncup, so I don't, it's mingingfanny pads for me
  • some pain getting in/out of a car

When they sewed me up it was 'too tight', so one year on I had to be cut+sewn again..

I won't go into the pelvic floor problems.

I'm glad you had a good experience, lots of women do.

Congrats on your newborn Thanks

whereisthewitch · 02/02/2014 19:38

I agree OP I needed one for ventouse too and had 3 stitches in total. It was a major worry for me too so hopefully our experiences can reassure others. My stitches just nipped a bit for about a week, no pain though.

ClaimedByMe · 02/02/2014 19:40

However, my baby boy was delivered via ventouse 13 days ago & I needed an episiotomy. As soon as the consultant walked in - I PANICKED!! But, there really wasn't any need, after being numbed "down there" he cut & my boy was delivered.

I took the pleasure of highlighting this quote and this is what you should be grateful for as some folk are not "numbed down there" and the feel of the cold sharp scissors cutting there bare skin never leaves them!

Quodlibet · 02/02/2014 19:59

I also had one (second degree) with a ventouse birth and it was fine. It has healed well and I was able to resume (gentle) sex after 4 weeks. I also think there's a value in saying this out loud, as I was also frightened of it beforehand, and I think we usually only hear the horror stories about assisted births and not much about the many many many occasions that they create no problems.

I've got to say, while I know I am fortunate and that some people really suffer with episiotomies, I find the tone of some of the previous posts a little sad. No one is denying that some epis have bad outcomes by highlighting their own positive experience, so why the need to wade in with horror stories and woopidoo?

elQuintoConyo · 02/02/2014 20:36

wade in with horror stories and woopidoo if you read my post, I wrote that in direct reference to the thread title. Episiotomies aren't "all that bad" wtf?

Sorry if my birth story makes you feel uncomfortable.

StopSquabbling · 02/02/2014 20:37

My episiotomy was bloody awful.

spritesoright · 02/02/2014 20:38

Agreed it healed quickly but I was shocked at the pain after the drugs wore off and barely being able to sit down or walk to the loo without pain. I also felt really violated afterwards as it's such an intimate area and I didn't feel it was totally necessary (I wanted to keep pushing and baby wasn't in any distress).
Glad you had a good experience though.

topknob · 02/02/2014 20:40

I will say try having a ventouse without the local, and in previous births, the cutting without a local, then you might see why it fucking hurts !

topknob · 02/02/2014 20:42

Oh and the midwife stitching you up with apparently disposable stitches which weren't and after two weeks you finally got taken seriously about how much they hurt and then got cut out over the skin which had started to heal over them.

Ithinkwerealonenow · 02/02/2014 20:46

Glad it worked out for you.

Mine came open again after 2 days, took months to heal up, gave me pain even walking for over a year. You get the picture. Thought I'd share too.

Velve · 02/02/2014 20:47

The title of the OP is rather arsey, imo.
Your episiotomy might not have been that bad but there's plenty of us with bad experiences of them.
Mine was hell. I was numb so didn't feel it being done but it took 12 weeks to heal properly and last time I had sex it still hurt. I've not had sex in months due to a non sleeping toddler but I suspect it's going to hurt again when I do.

Fishandjam · 02/02/2014 20:50

Hmm. Mine was the length of the M11. Couldn't walk properly for at least 2 weeks, nor sit comfortably.

It healed fine and I have no lasting problems.

So yes, it was bad at the time, but I'm fine now. So I guess I agree 50%?

sksk · 02/02/2014 20:52

Mummy2014, how bad was your teaser first time around? Congratulations on your baby! I had a fourth degree tear six months ago an d am still, suffering, physically and emotionally.

Amethyst35 · 02/02/2014 20:54

Mine was done without my knowledge or consent (had epidural, but was out of my mind with sciatica type pains shooting down my legs). I was told afterwards and I quote "oh by the way we did an episiotomy". That wasn't the only thing they did without my consent, some of which I didn't find out until 4 months later. Kettering Maternity Unit. Awful place.

TeamWill · 02/02/2014 20:56

My episiotomy ( chosen rather than endure a second tear) was NOTHING compared to the 3rd degree tear I experienced first time round.
It healed really quickly.
The tear took about 9 months before it was in anyway comfortable to sit,poo etc.

DontmindifIdo · 02/02/2014 20:56

Glad yours was ok. Mine wasn't. Mine went a bit wrong. I had to stay in hospital for quite some time and have several bags of blood put back in me and lots of angst. Sad

I cried about it a bit and the lovely consultant let me have a c section for DC2. Far nicer experience.

I know if it does go all by the book it's not that bad, but so few woman seem to have a 'by the book' episiotomy.

lalouche · 02/02/2014 20:58

We all know things go wrong, but it is helpful for those about to go through labour for the first time to hear from people for whom scary procedures were not as bad as they expected. I tore messily with dc1 and was in pain for a good 6 weeks. I'm still not quite normal 6yrs down the line. I wouldn't begrudge someone posting to say that their experience of bad tearing wasn't as bad as they expected. Likewise I know that my impending c section could be a total nightmare, but I've been happy to read experiences on here of those for whom it was totally fine. Sorry for those for whom episiotomies were horrendous, but the snippy tone is unnecessary.

CharlieWoo · 02/02/2014 20:59

Mine wasn't nice, and i would hate another. I couldn't sit down or walk properly without horrible pain for about 2 weeks. I also couldn't stand up if I was laying down, it hurt too much to get up.
My stitches came open and the doctors decided to leave a the large hole open to heal on its own. The only thing that helped the pain was warm baths. I lived in the bath for days. The area has healed now but the skin is numb and hurts during sex sometimes.

MaxsMummy2012 · 02/02/2014 21:00

Lucky you, mine was horrendous, hurt to high heaven being stitched up afterwards only for them to split open a few days later, became infected took 3 lots of antibiotics to clear up the infection and bloody weeks before I could sit down without pain, sex was awful for months!

DorothyBastard · 02/02/2014 21:00

I was cut three times, an episiotomy and both labia we're cut too. I had had an epidural and was asked permission so I was lucky really. But my episiotomy was not stitched up properly and opened up a few days after birth. It was agony, especially because there was nothing that could be done and I just had to let it heal naturally.

It's pretty clear that everyone's experience is completely different. Some people are lucky, some people suffer ill effects indefinitely, some people, like myself, are neither happy or unhappy about it. But perhaps you can see why your thread title is a bit offensive, OP.

WinterDrawsOff · 02/02/2014 21:05

I'm glad your baby boy was born safely OP. I had an episiotomy nearly 26 years ago without a local anaesthetic. I am not one of those women who say that you forget the pain of childbirth as soon as your baby is born.

CoteDAzur · 02/02/2014 21:07

Thread title makes me stabby. "Episiotomies aren't all that bad", are they? And you know this because of you experienced a grand total of... ONE? Angry

As elQuinto said, hooray for you. Some of us have had a horrible time following huge episiotomies, which caused us not only excruciating pain over months or years but traumatised us psychologically.

Oh and by the way, I had a car crash and came out fine. So feel free to drive under a truck, because car crashes aren't all that bad Hmm

StopSquabbling · 02/02/2014 21:22

I agree with Cote, my episiotomy and the wretched aftermath was by far the single most awful aspect of giving birth.

Ithinkwerealonenow · 02/02/2014 21:23

Also people who coyly use the phrase "down there" make me a bit stabby as well. You're talking about episiotomies fgs, you are allowed to use the correct anatomical terms.

Swipe left for the next trending thread