The PESH deli for those who are realising there are real live baybees at the end of this.

[rots]

BESH BAYBEES
dontrythisathome, Bay Amaryllis born March 25.
Cheggers, twinz girlz, born April
FannyPriceless, boy, born June 8

UPDIFFED
CUNextTuesday, takes no shit from the Daily Mail, due June 28
IggyPiggy, The one who loves BUMSEX, due July 20
CurlyCasper, hospital botherer due July 21 (girl)
Skihorse, cradle snatching web geek, due July 22 (boy)
Carrots, organic hippy hunter, due July 25 (boy)
Cosmosis, the one that likes a good ride, due August 22
backinthebox, she bought a racehorse, due September 6
skatergrrrl, the one that overtook the rest, September ??
VAG, lives in De Nile, due 19 September
silversky, the biggest farter, due 21 October (first baybee)
Honeymoo, no it's not fucking indigestion, due November 2 (boy)
okiecokie, self-confessed control freak, due November 6
SomethingSuitablyWitty, benelux babe, due November 14
ReginaMonologue, big pants, 5* hotels, Bridget Jones due November 20
maswera, jungle hottie - due November (???)
PollyPoo, wants to name her baybee after the dog, The New Messiah is due December 25

Whoops - in excitement missed that Casp's off home - hooray! Have a lovely evening!

Hope Ski is OK, she will be so fucked off at being in hossie.

Push Cunty, push!

I haz heard nothing else from her, I'll update if I do.

ski WTF! Now I was not expecting to read that. Hope you are ok and demanding Brie baguettes.

Seems to be a lot of baybee/birthing envy going on! You crazy gals.

regs I is usually a 12 but am now a 16 ! But for proper boob coverage i should probably go for 18s. Will be heading off to Evans tmw for mooch round their sale racks. Three tshirts for £12 dontcha know.

Fanks for Asos and Very suggestions - brain fails to remind me who suggested them!

Breast pumps - I bought the TT one in Boots for half price and I will prob get the TT electric steM steriliser which is half price on MuvvaCare.

I joined MC's Baby and Me club - cue lots of money off vouchers. Not amazing value but better than a kick in the nethers.

ooh blimey ski - wasn't expecting that!

good luck missus - hope all will be well.

quick cheer for cunty too - now breathe!!!!

impressed at new mum postings. i very rarely get near laptop nevermind full on posting.

well done you girls!

and affectionate headbutts everyone else

ski hope you're ok,and you have a chance to get your head around the speedy change of plans.

Saw messages on cunty's fb that imply rastus is indeed here....

Oh ski I'm gutted to hear you've been taken in. Hope you get a nice hossie with AC so at least you'll get a break from the heat Will txt you in case you can't get onto here.

fanny elimination communication

cunty been thinking of you all day. No doubt next time you get back here you'll be detached

But worried about poor ski What a shock for her and JB. Thank goodness they picked it up and she'll be totally fine in hos but a bit tedious and not what she wanted

gin was just about to post same! yay cunty well done you!

Oooh oooh definate wall posts implying a new arrival (although nothing from her yet). C'mon cunty!!!

Ola chicas! Muchos excitement about the cuntiful one!! Any more news??

Anyhow, I wanted advice ladies...I ate a minimilk earlier, and it was quite soft.....should I don a hair shirt now, or do you think there is hope for my soul??

Hope everything ok - I've seen lots of 'that's awful ski' posts but can't find anything from her about what's up? positive vibes your way lady, whatever the problem

rots OK, so I'd heard of 'free bleeding' (weirdo hippy women) but can't believe that free pooing actually exists! The world gets stranger every day.

Waits for 'official' word... but yay cunty!

cheggs Yes, but the difference is you literally have both hands full!

salty ski has gone into hossie with pre-eclampsia.

oh buggeration, poor ski.

I pray poor Ski will have the easiest birth evah. What with her nonstop pukeyness for last 9 months and now this, she deserves to lightly exhale her baybee out.

Gah, Ski, adding to copious piles of loves and goodwill. I blame the heat . Will be lurking like a lurker for updates.

Hoopla for the Cuntlet!

Got a text from hercuntiness.

Apparently it 'smarted'

woooooooooo!!! Yay cunty!!!!

Confabulations dearest RubyTuesday!

'Fess up and share the details someone!!!!!!

SOOOOOOOOOOOOOO happy for ya, Cunty! I'm sure any smarting will clear up after a couple of paracetamol NEKKID DANCING TIME!

Text from the sledding equine - she is still in hospital but it's ok, she remembered to put the champers on ice before she left! not likely she will leave without offspring however so looks like she's in for the long haul/heave/push soon via induction maybe tomorrow

poor ski. I hope it all goes well, I know she was planning a ladylike sneeze...

cuntyNEWS

Boy, born 4.35am. No name yet... 8lb 7oz.

and she particularly wanted me to mention 'the total amityville horror that is my undercarriage'

erk.

PM not AM. Twat.

Would nekkid dance but still got pain in my right hand side.

honey with you on poor ski.

"And thick and fast they came at last,
And more, and more, and more--
All hopping through the frothy waves,
And scrambling to the shore."

(Maybe I'll give birth on a seashore - although I won't then pass us another slice and eat offspring).

shit! Was posting in car with dodgy signal earlier, took an age and i managed to completely miss ski's news. Sorry it all changed mate, and hope it goes as smoothly as it can.
Congrats to cunty! yes, it smarts like buggery, but he's worth it i am sure. Having just had one, i can highly recommend a tea tree oil and tcp bath. hope your recovery is swift.

Thanks fanny. I heart my platy!
Will tune in tomorrow...

Thanks for the cunty update, ginnie. Tho' could have done w/out the amityville ref. Eeew.

Am having an odd evening; wiped out with what feels like food poisoning, though know it can't actually be. Is this normal? Back hurts, head hurts, had the runs earlier tho' has stopped now, exhausted. Pliz to tell me this is what you remember?

woohoo Cunty, mahooosive congratulations on your little boy. My two pieces of post birth advice are 1. try to poo as soon as possible and when you poo/wee put your head between you knees towards the floor (trust me on this one), and 2. get a cleaner

And good luck ski! Hope the induction is quick and easy and you're home soon.

Hello everyone else! And belated congrats to you Camelina!