To not buy her a tail, so she can be like her friend who ‘is a therian’

[Laura9899]

My ten year old has a friend who seems nice and has sane sensible normal parents and yet she wears a tail and tells my daughter she’s a therian. I’m not in any way happy with all the furry rubbish and this feels along the same lines. My daughter has now asked to be a cat for Halloween, then asked for a furry tail as part of her costume, and now I think it’s actually so she can join in with her friend. They are only ten so it’s likely just play but there’s no way I’m letting her go out in a tail 🙄.

I do. My DNephew lived in his leopaard dress up suit for a while but he kew he was dressing up. The problem starts when they try to say they are something other than they are and refuse to acknowledge it's make believe.

Get her to read “where the wild things are” 😂

💯 agree @Longtimelurker1980

@ChilliBassy clearly you want to be a cool mum who lets her child ‘express’ herself however she likes. Parent your child.

But I bet he wasn’t a 10 year old.

He was once.
Before deciding he was part animal therefore is attracted to his type of animal too. It starts somewhere..
Posters aren’t understanding that the new trend among ten year olds is not born through a fun game, there is a dark element to it, your children are being influenced, like the pp’s including me with young adults / teenagers who were influenced the same way by the trans trend.
You have been warned.

Some people have very odd boundaries re. children. I was accused of "sexualising children" when I disagreed that parents should be showing their children how to do specific sex acts, because to me that sounds like child abuse. Their argument was that showing their children sexual stuff would prevent abuse in the future.

As someone old enough to have first-hand experience, it's worth noting that the moral panic here - that unseen bad actors will somehow sexualise and steal away our kids - is very similar to that around gay and lesbian people in the 80s. It's why we went on the Section 28 marches.

Some posters are coming from the same place of hate and ignorance. We've been here before, and we see you. Others have been swept along by tide.

Well you were doing/advocating for doing the opposite of sexualising children, so that’s obviously ludicrous.

You could use this “slippery slope” argument about literally anything. If she wants a boyfriend are you going to react by saying “absolutely not, I know what weird perversions that could lead to later down the line”? She has asked for a tail for a Halloween costume. IF she were to want to take it further after that THEN the answer should be no.

You could even say beforehand that you intent to sell the costume on vinted asap to recoup costs for Christmas. But just saying no based on something you imagine is going to happen next is insane.

You generally do not need to be concerned, as child psychologists and experts consider exploring a therian identity to be a normal, harmless part of imaginative play and identity exploration

Funny how claiming to be a therian wasn't a normal part of "identity exploration" prior to 1992.

If I were a parent of young kids, today, I'm afraid your "child psychologists and experts" would provide me no reassurance.

It would be an interesting social experiment to create a new subculture, give it exposure via TikTok and other SM platforms then sit back and wait until it starts being justified by "experts" as a "normal part" of imaginative play and "identity exploration".

Yes that was the point, I was answering the poster who said she’s not likely to be still doing it as an adult.

yes to dressing up and playing. For Halloween and playing with friends. No to believing you are a cat or any other such creature because that goes from playing to insanity.

I’ve found comments like ‘awww it’s cute they still play dressy up at that age isn’t it. Mine stopped when they were about 8 but they grow up too fast don’t they’ annoys the teens who want you to think they think they are animals.

If my teen wanted to be a real cat I’d be all for it - no phones, computers, social media, tv and fish and vegetables for tea every night. They’d sharp be human again!

Just been reading a bit more about this after OPs update..

Apologies if it has already been mentioned but it appears furries like to dress up as animals as a form of escapism (my friend's daughter is part of this community) but they do not believe that they are animals. Therians on the other hand believe they are animals (which is way weirder).

I feel like this might be a slightly one sided telling of this. What do you mean by showing children how to do specific sessions acts? And where did you come across these parents?

There are several people who do t grasp that it’s not dress up that’s the issue, it’s naming herself as a therian and saying that she is a cat/wolf, and the falling out with another friend who questioned it.
it feels very “I’m a woman and if you DARE to question me you are a terf”.
id rather my ten year old doesn’t los
ya contact with reality.

Oh come on, pretending to be a cat/wolf isn't going to turn your child trans so don't panic.

Just like in the 80s when metal music didn't turn a load of kids into satanists.

Sorry, but unless you're some kind of anti-trans obsessive, it's nothing like that.

It's a 10-year old playing a game with her friend where they pretend to be a cat.

Or watching Mark on Eastenders turning you gay.

We've been here before, over and over. it's ludicrous.

I thought it was the friend that called herself a therian? All your child had asked for is a tail as part of a cat costume on Halloween?

To me it seems harmless, but it's also an opportunity to chat to your daughter about these things. About the difference between real and pretend. Basically trying to nip your actual concerns in the bud whilst letting her play dress up because she's a kid.

An online discussion about a TV programme "the family sex show". However, the person advocating for the show went further and said it is better for trusted adults to demonstrate sex positions to a child because otherwise, how would they know if theyre being sexually abused or not? I disagreed.

I think this is probably the best solution. Gives OP the opportunity to explain her concerns and make sure DD understands that dressing up is not reality, while still letting her have her fun.

I went to a restaurant recently and there were people (adults) dressed as cats and dogs miowing and woofing over the buffet.

We left.

Very bizarre.

I don’t care what people do in their own homes or on Halloween etc but it’s weird to make other people a part of the charade.

I read an article in The Times about how to keep a relationship thriving. Apparently, we greet our dogs much more warmly than we greet our partners. So now when my bloke comes in from work, I quite often bark!