To not buy her a tail, so she can be like her friend who ‘is a therian’

[Laura9899]

My ten year old has a friend who seems nice and has sane sensible normal parents and yet she wears a tail and tells my daughter she’s a therian. I’m not in any way happy with all the furry rubbish and this feels along the same lines. My daughter has now asked to be a cat for Halloween, then asked for a furry tail as part of her costume, and now I think it’s actually so she can join in with her friend. They are only ten so it’s likely just play but there’s no way I’m letting her go out in a tail 🙄.

🤣

Well not half way up a twenty foot tree it isn’t, no! 🌳 🥜 👀

Being themselves, but in a way that’s constructive and doesn’t put them or others in danger.

I hope she gets taken to the vet regularly!

There are some parents who should never be parents. Bloody ridiculous

It just a phase, mines 9 and loves a tail and paws. She knows she’s a human though, my eldest did the same. He’s now 15 and wouldn’t be seen dead. It really is such a common phase.

Ditto, several of my friends and I were horses... in the playground, on the field, at a friends house once we'd put the real ponies back in their field.. We'd canter about (cantering is FUN, more folk should canter about), jump stuff, we'd sometimes make a tail out of a bundle of straw or once, yarn, and got absolutely bollocked for it.. and tie it to a belt loop..

It was play and it stopped at secondary school... it's no different to dressing up as princesses or train drivers or bloody astronauts... and it was made super clear that there were times for messing around, dressing up and pretending... and times for proper clothes and if we wanted to go round the shops or go to a museum or whatever the adults wanted to do.. we did it dressed sensibly for the activity.

Do kids not have dressing up boxes now? Do parents not have a chat about how pretend is fun, make believe is enjoyable, some people grow up and do it for a living and it is called 'acting'... and we can't do it all day long every day any more than we can eat jelly and icecream for every meal or watch cartoons exclusively?

I just looked up ‘Therian’ and on Wikipedia there is nothing fetish relating or sexual at all. It’s a bit odd for sure but there was no sexual links mentioned at all.

Anything can end up sexualised. People have strange kinks. Predators are out there in ALL walks of life from the the very wealthy aristocrats (Andrew) to any subculture you can think of. Banning kids from dressing up does not equal protection.

I get what you are saying but if she wants to dress up as a cat for halloween what is the harm? I don't think her 10yo friend is a therian even if she thinks she is. She has just likely heard the term as being people who dress up as animals and thinks it sounds fun. The furry community is a whole different thing and while I don't understand it at all, apparently professional people like to do it to unwind. They join groups who hold events and design personal characters. These people are not just buying a tail and dressing up for halloween (or dressing up generally as children like to do).

Just to add my former little tiger is now 20 and still loves a fancy dress party (and has been to comicon) but wouldn't be seen dead in a fur suit :D

A 10 year old wanting to be a cat for Halloween is harmless IMO. The issue is the friend who clearly has too much unsupervised access to the internet to be learning about these things. Speak to your daughter about why it’s inappropriate and avoid letting her go to the friend’s house.

THIS
I despair at silly parents, I really do.

😂🤣😅🤣😂

It's genuinely disturbing how many women on this thread want to attach a sexual element to young girls dressing up. They're just kids.

My daughter has several tails and has made her own masks. I am delighted tbh as she has dyslexia and fine motor DCD and has shown zero interest in crafting and this project has got her off her screens and allowing her to be creative. She is now making something non specific animal related for Halloween. She certainly doesn’t identify with any particular animal, it’s just play.
She is developmentally delayed and has had a lot of struggles (adopted). She finds comfort from being part of a small group doing this, I guess if you are privileged enough to judge this so harshly you live quite a sheltered life and haven’t really understood the appeal. I do but I guess I have a very different benchmark. I just want her to be happy, and included.

Would she self describe as a therian @Icecreammonster ?
if so, where did she learn the term?

It’s genuinely disturbing how many posters want to “squirrel” this type of thing!
“nothing to see here… it’s all good fun you beige boring people”.. 🤔

Wasn’t there a time when believing you were cat would generally get you referred to a psychiatrist?

What is there to see?

You think girls making cat masks believe they are cats 😂

A tail as part of a Halloween costume would be fine imo. A tail regularly as part of a therian identity "No DD, you're 10 not 4 and you're a girl not a cat".

This is when I realised there was ‘more to it. I offered a tights stuffed tail, she said no it has to be big fluffy one like friend.
friend introduced her to therian concept, then fell out with another friend who ‘didn’t respect her beliefs’. My daughter is very much in a ‘must be kind, must be good friend’ phase so will follow along like a sheep rather than call it out.

It seems like a harmless phase that she will outgrow. Not that different to wanting a princess outfit. Make a big deal out of it and it will become a bigger deal.

You’re quite right, @Laura9899

this trend is sexualised and creepy for kids

She sounds very much like my daughter at that age. The type of child sucked into this community, just keep your eyes on who she’s getting this drive from. I will never forget the day DD said she was changing her name and pronouns.
As mentioned above I’m glad that she realised her feelings of not belonging were not wrapped up in the trans trend but her extra Sen needs.