AIBU to feel uneasy about a teacher commenting on my daughter's eyes?

[Kickinthenostalgia]

For context dd14 is in year 9, she’s very much all for her friends, always stuck in the middle, never starts arguments, she’s never in trouble, never had detention, most of the teachers love her, although she has a few boy best friends she’s not really into relationships just yet. Got a call today from the school, immediately my backs up because usually the only time they call me is when she’s in the medical room. No it’s a teacher singing DD’s praises, saying how she’s a pleasure to teach, etc etc. he mentioned he’s a new teacher at the school and as a father didn’t get feedback for his daughter who has just left so wanted to do it for his promising students.
so I was just talking to my mum about it, and she said to me is that the same teacher that told dd she had really nice eyes.
of course I’m like what you talking about, she never said anything. I laughed it off at first but the more I think about it, it’s a bit creepy. No? My mum defo wasn’t impressed and I’m surprised dd didn’t tell me considering she tells me everytime a teacher so much as shouts at her class. Obviously I don’t know the full story as she’s at school. I know I’ll need to keep an eye on this. I don’t know who it is, but just a bit surprised. I’m not being unreasonable to think this is slightly creepy right?

Update …..
so I asked dd who it was, it wasn’t the teacher that called up. She explained what happened, tbh apart from thinking it was a little creepy herself she was pretty nonchalant about it.
so apparently her and her best friend were the first 2 waiting outside of his classroom, he randomly said you’ve got lovely eyes, they are a nice green colour. She said she was like thanks awkwardly but she thinks he was just trying make conversation because they were waiting for everyone else. Probably the wrong thing to say in hindsight. Luckily dd isn’t going to start making false allegations, which I know some girls have done before on the basis of a seemingly innocent comment.
she then went on to tell me that her and her best friend were actually joking about it today before his lesson,
she said
‘oh jeez, I hope he don’t mention my eyes again’ to which her friend replied.
’ok but (Name) you have such lovely green eyes”

i did say to her lucky she didnt mention sometimes her eyes look blue 😅
all in all I’m not extremely worried right now, will keep my wits about me and keep an eye on the situation.
she also said she didn’t tell me because she just forgot. Had more important things on her mind, like what skincare she needs to buy with her birthday money 🙄 teens hey

thanks for everyone’s input, much appreciated.

You really ought to report this.

Not sure whether the poster means the eye comment or the nice phone call but don't report it. That would be a completely over the top response and basically implying these teachers have been inappropriate when at the moment it just looks like they've tried to be nice.

The eye comment is slightly misjudged but unless it's part of a wider more concerning pattern of comments and behaviour I wouldn't think it's sinister.

No. The eye comment from her update. The teacher should not have done that.

Postcards from schools are very common. They're usually sent for each subject to a select number of top pupils to recognise their achievement and parents put them on the fridge.

It's not like a postcard from the teacher on his holidays to the pupil - that would be inappropriate!

I'm going to be direct because people seem to misunderstand; following this update, please report this incident to the school.

Luckily dd isn’t going to start making false allegations, which I know some girls have done before on the basis of a seemingly innocent comment.
What is wrong with you, OP? Have a word with yourself.

The comment is still completely inappropriate and should be reported to the school. I'm glad it didn't come from the same man, but the context didn't make it any better and it is still concerning.

I am a primary school teacher. I often tell the children that their hair is lovely. Is this inappropriate?

Why are you asking us? You've had hours of training.

It's the human side of a teacher coming out. And no, not every micro behaviour and approach is explicitly taught or instructed.

If it's inappropriate, I would stop.

Teachers often phone parents to say how well children are doing. Be glad.

However, you will have had guidelines on Safeguarding and Child Protection, sessions on all aspects of this, regular updates and you will be using cpoms.
In my experience, we have been explicitly instructed not to comment on the students' appearance, either positive or negative. We are warned about outcomes.
So I'm just going on experience.

Wow, people on this thread are weird. Report the teacher for what?! If it was a female teacher would you also report?

My daughter had a female tutor who kept telling her how pretty she is. She took it as a compliment as was intended 🤷‍♀️ why report any tiny throw-away (nice) comment?

I have had a teacher call and sing DD praises. I think it's something some of them like to do and I love it! The eye thing needs checking out to understand the context better but I don't think the phone call is at all odd.

I think it's inappropriate for a teacher to compliment a students physical apparence unless there's context that makes it ok. The way it happened with your daughter would make me cautious. I don't think enough has happened yet to complain or anything, but definitely be on the lookout and make sure she knows the signs of grooming etc.

I would never comment negatively but sometimes it's hard not comment on a new hair cut or a pretty style. Otherwise it's all so robotic.

Perhaps it's because we teach teenagers. They will make accusations, so it's important to self protect.

Potential grooming behaviour. I'd give them school safeguarding lead a call. They will likely check which other parents he's called in the first instance.

In all my years of school (many decades ago) I remember only one comment about appearance, made by our much loved (female) English teacher who had met us all at the theatre at Stratford where we were taken as a class. We all made a big effort to get dressed up (of course) and she said "What pretty girls you are, you all look lovely". She was a bit of a style icon at our school and this was much appreciated.

Personal remarks about eye colour seem very strange to me. As far as a teacher phoning you to praise your daughter, I'd have thought that would be more common in the case of someone who is struggling or has issues but has done well in spite of them, to boost confidence, rather than a well behaved 'promising' high achiever, but perhaps it is policy.

Eye on, I'd say, @Kickinthenostalgia

It's not the teacher who made the phone call, but you're right. It has to be reported and investigated.

I've had an English teacher ring me singing my daughter's praises.

I’ve had teachers sing my children’s praises in person - one even said they’d love to adopt my son (and he was usually in trouble for one thing or another). The same teacher also waxed lyrical about my DD’s hair (she does have amazing below the waist length auburn hair) . This was a woman - does that make it different?

Many secondary school teachers on this thread have confirmed that this is current good practice.

Definitely!!!! If you're male telling a female pupil 🙄

This is not right OP. If that was me, I'd definitely be calling school.