Please or to access all these features

AIBU?

Share your dilemmas and get honest opinions from other Mumsnetters.

To share this gem about the menopause with you all!

106 replies

PyongyangKipperbang · Yesterday 19:44

Taken from a book I found today in a charity shop. So much to say that its hard to know where to start!

The Radio Doctor's Dictionary of Health by Charles Hill, published in 1952.

There may or many not be seven stages of man. There are certainly three phases in the life of a woman. The first is the phase of childhood which passes with the physical and mental changes occurring at puberty into the second or middle phase of womanhood.
The third phase begins, usually between the ages of forty and forty-five, with the so-called menopause or change of life. Puberty, which may begin at the age of twelve or thirteen, come on with amazing quickness. The menopause on the other hand, develops slowly and deliberately. It marks the end of menstruation which first becomes irregular and later disappears. The change of life completed, there can no longer be childbearing.
The menopause is marked by both mental and physical changes. The warmth of physical feelings gives way to the calmness of serene affection, and quite often to a wider interest in the affairs of the world. The change may take one or two years, varying in length in different people. The reproductive organs, no longer functioning, become smaller. There may be symptoms which for a while unpleasant. For example, there may be sweating and giddiness, heats or flushes. These sensations may come on without warning. For most women, this is all that happens. Occasionally, however, there may be trying headaches and uneasy sensations, particularly in the breasts. At this time some women begin to put on weight. Much more rarely there are nervous troubles, particularly amongst those whose days are too leisured.
What can be done? For the most part, nothing need be done. It is best, though this is not always easy, to ignore what is happening and to carry on a normal life. The sympathy of others is no good. Giving in is a mistake. The less notice is taken of the change of life, the more quickly it seems to pass.
It helps to cut down diet, although nowadays our rations do that for us. Alcohol affords no relief. Indeed, it may make matters worse rather than better. The change of life, it must be remembered, is a normal, natural thing. It is not an illness or the beginning of an illness. It's a milestone, not a millstone.
The change may bring with it a release of energy, a need for activity in many new directions. Occasionally it makes a woman appear a little too managing, because she is filled with a desire to reform the lives of other. But most women suffer little or nothing. Eighty-five out of every hundred women pass through the menopause without being troubled by it. This is the occasion for an important warning. If the periods, having stopped, should appear to start again, a doctor should always be consulted,. There may be something wrong.

The third phase of life is sometimes the richest phase, the one in which to find tranquillity, and a full peaceful happiness.

OP posts:
QueenietheGreat · Yesterday 21:58

@PyongyangKipperbang
To the man who's written about it
And me, as the woman, who's actually gone though it, i
Would like to say that I love a good fairytale
To that man

ScrollingLeaves · Yesterday 21:59

BoogieVoogieAllNightLong · Yesterday 21:14

There's another bit where it says, and I'm paraphrasing here, if you are single and sexually frustrated, don't become a massive wanker, take up athletics instead. 😆

Better than the modern porn soaked men.

PyongyangKipperbang · Yesterday 22:01

ScrollingLeaves · Yesterday 21:59

Better than the modern porn soaked men.

Whilst I dont disagree, I hope that there is a middle ground between a load of men all desperately running marathons to avoid a wank, and a load of men having a wanking marathon!

OP posts:
Mustreadabook · Yesterday 22:02

seahorsessky · Yesterday 19:57

Apparently, in societies where women finished work early, and old age is more respected, menopause is generally tolerated better!
And women of 45 would often be grandmothers in 1952, living close to their family and probably more honoured than they are now.
At least he admits weight gain can be a real issue, and of metabolic conditions, like lipedema, even if he doesn't use those terms-the number of smug people who act like if you eat well and exercise today you'll definitely stay slim is annoying.

She may be a grandmother, but without contraception she may have a toddler child number 12 following here about.

PyongyangKipperbang · Yesterday 22:05

Mustreadabook · Yesterday 22:02

She may be a grandmother, but without contraception she may have a toddler child number 12 following here about.

Happened to my Great Grandmother! She had a "change" baby, which turned out to be twin boys about 6 months before my Grandmother gave birth to the first grandchild!

OP posts:
FancyKitten · Yesterday 22:05

Very much enjoyed this! Thanks for sharing.

RafaFan · Yesterday 22:06

There are large parts of that my mum (88) would agree with. I've recently been asking her about it as I am getting to that stage myself.

WearyAuldWumman · Yesterday 22:23

PyongyangKipperbang · Yesterday 22:05

Happened to my Great Grandmother! She had a "change" baby, which turned out to be twin boys about 6 months before my Grandmother gave birth to the first grandchild!

Same with my great-grandmother and grandmother.

PyongyangKipperbang · Yesterday 22:26

WearyAuldWumman · Yesterday 22:23

Same with my great-grandmother and grandmother.

Great Grandmother had new born twins at Grandma's wedding which was a bit.....rushed 😉

OP posts:
AInightingale · Yesterday 22:30

All my great-grandmothers had babies when they were well into their forties. I don't know why we think of late motherhood as a recent, 'modern' thing. Working class women had unbelievably hard lives and every one of those late, high risk labours took place at home. My great aunt delivered her own siblings.

samthepigeon · Yesterday 22:36

Giving in is a mistake.

Just remember this.

OsfameronTanamoril · Yesterday 22:37

Enjoyed this! Agree about the 'serene affection'. And some other bits.

NeverDropYourMooncup · Yesterday 22:38

What is good about it is that the writer makes the point of saying post menopausal bleeding needs a doctor's appointment straight away.

And this discussion of weight loss - it's as though not everybody was thin. That contradicts multiple posters on here.

PyongyangKipperbang · Yesterday 22:38

AInightingale · Yesterday 22:30

All my great-grandmothers had babies when they were well into their forties. I don't know why we think of late motherhood as a recent, 'modern' thing. Working class women had unbelievably hard lives and every one of those late, high risk labours took place at home. My great aunt delivered her own siblings.

Great Gmother had her undiagnosed twins at home in1938. I dont think we always appreciate what they went through.

OP posts:
RampantIvy · Yesterday 22:39

It's a milestone, not a millstone

I liked this ^^. although it isn't true for everyone, but I am going to use the phrase in other situations.

justasking111 · Yesterday 22:43

Was at a party last Christmas. Because I'd just had hip surgery sat down on a sofa for most of the evening. People standing circulated around me. Looking at the men 60 plus especially the slim ones I suddenly realised that they no longer had a rounded backside. The seat of their trousers was just empty.

My DH used to have a lovely bum, that's gone too. Even the ones with a belly couldn't fill the back of their trousers.

And don't get me started on body hair that disappears too. I used to love chest hair our age group males lose that and weirdly leg hair.

So men change too.

RaininSummer · Yesterday 22:43

A lot of the menopause stuff rings true for me.

OsfameronTanamoril · Yesterday 22:45

I have definitely had a " desire for activity in many directions".
Though I know it affects other women rather differently.

Pedant61 · Yesterday 22:46

concertinacornflake · Yesterday 19:51

What can be done? For the most part, nothing need be done. It is best, though this is not always easy, to ignore what is happening and to carry on a normal life. The sympathy of others is no good. Giving in is a mistake. The less notice is taken of the change of life, the more quickly it seems to pass.

Wonder how Mrs Hill (if there was one) felt about Charles ignoring her and offering no sympathy.

Edited

Probably relieved to be treated like a proper person, and not fussed over and made out to be a wet lettuce.

ExOptimist · Yesterday 22:47

I'm 62 and well past menopause. I actually agree with quite a lot of what he said.

I didn't have mood changes but had terrible hot flushes and frequent flooding periods, but having felt so awful on the contraceptive pill I couldn't continue with it I decided not to take HRT.

I knew that if I put up with the symptoms at some point I'd be through it, and eventually I was. I am quite fond of the stiff upper lip and get on with it approach to life though.

Disturbia81 · Yesterday 22:47

Well I want physical feelings more than I ever have!

LBFseBrom · Yesterday 22:48

Very quaint use of the word, "quickness', which is not incorrect but most people would say, "speed".

I remember my mother telling me it doesn't last and you feel good afterwards. That is true.

My husband's grandmother had a book called, "What every young woman should know". That was really quaint! If you didn't know anything before you read it, you'd know less when you'd finished :-).

That is a gem of a book, hang on to it.

OsfameronTanamoril · Yesterday 22:50

' The sympathy of others is no good'.
I would like that on a t-shirt!

Additup · Yesterday 22:52

I certainly wouldn't be experiencing tranquility and full peaceful happiness if I didn't have any vaginal oestrogen available 😂

ProsyFossil · Yesterday 22:57

Much more rarely there are nervous troubles, particularly amongst those whose days are too leisured

Oh I wish...

Swipe left for the next trending thread