My parents have become insufferable.

[PleasePleasePleaseDontProve]

I am really struggling with my parents. Both are mid-sixties, retired. It seems since retirement they have become quite bigoted, insufferable and insular in their viewpoints. Every time I meet up with them conversations revolve around:

• Illegal immigration / people on benefits / Reform and Nigel Farage. Essentially focussing around the latest GB news story (which they watch religiously).
• Their latest or ongoing health ailments and how poor, in their view, the NHS is.
• Unnecessary and rude descriptions to describe other people (could be random strangers) or people they know. For example, ‘our fat neighbour has put on tons of weight.’

I used to have a fantastic relationship with my parents, particularly my father, and I’m sure he wasn’t always like this. I’m starting to dislike meeting up with them as their attitudes seem to have changed towards life and people in general, and they constantly want to discuss the latest GB News story.

Has anybody else found this has happened to their parents?

Id be up for this! It would help me get through my Dad's visits!

Not my parents but my friend who has just turned 70 and seems to have totally lost her filter. I’ve known her for 20years and I’m not quite sure what’s going on, I’ve thought she might have the startings of dementia. I’ve told her that her comments are rascist but she doesn’t even seem to notice.

My mum is the same watches gb news all day has health problems that she won’t do anything about. Thinks Nigel farage is going to save the uk. Has loads of health problems so won’t go out and do things or have any kind of life but also won’t go to the doctors because it’s too long to wait.
My in-laws are the opposite in their 70’s and 80’s still go to groups and on breaks and holidays their outlook on life is very different. I don’t know what the answer is. I got myself into a bit of a rut with worrying about her last year and this year I’ve just decided to let her crack on because I know for a fact she didn’t have this worry with her own parents.

My parents are not like this but I have other family members who are. What really strikes me is how angry and unhappy they are. I really think that having GB news on a constant cycle has made them quite unwell. The content is designed to make people angry and it works.

I've set it up here under a different username :)

https://www.mumsnet.com/talk/relationships/5578946-support-thread-for-those-dealing-with-intolerant-or-racist-parents

All are welcome!! Please feel free to keep it going if I don't log in. I'm not too regular a poster on MN these days...

Yes, mine are exactly the same.

@BruFord, my grandmother was a great one for capping others' illnesses - no-one could have had it worse than her or another family member. One day, my dad was telling her about a work colleague who had had an illness and, sadly, died as a result. Quick as a flash, Grandma responded with: "well it couldn't have been as bad as our so and so." My dad immediately replied: "the poor man died of it. Just how bad does it have to be?" 😆

I have one of those in my family. I've never really understood competitive illness

It is common these days for people of all ages to be swept up by the constant media. Growing waiting lists, boat crossings, lack of action, they are fuelling emotions in people. I know more than a few people much younger who have a pain in their neck with service delays, higher taxes and cost cutting measures, working to have nothing at the end of the month. Watching the government find money pay to put up 1000’s of men in hotels, no GP appointments, huge waiting lists and an ever growing benefit bill.
I have stopped watching the news. I never watched GB anyway but like others I’m fed up with the cost of living crisis. We use to enjoy the occasional treat, it creates frustration,

Have you ever considered, OP, that your parents might be right?

I don't think so.

We're in our 60s and are nothing like this. We don't even watch TV news.
However, I do notice some of my friends are more likely to talk about their ailments as they get older, and I swear I'll never be like that, because it's so incredibly tedious!

Then you're the problem.

I'm swept up with nothing because I don't hate people on benefits and I don't believe the anti migrant bollocks. Don't talk crap. Right wing rubbish. Dog whistling. The NHS saved my mum's life and it put me back together when I had a serious accident.

You mean racists are whipping up hate yes

Am I fuck. Jog on.

It’s not really about being right or wrong. It’s the level of obsession that these topics are having on their lives and the fact they can’t have normal conversations anymore.

I feel much the same way about people who endlessly talk about their children. Or football.

This has happened to my parents friends and some of my friends parents.
Last year some that use social media were posting conspiracy theories nearly daily about Kier Starmer controlling us.
One of DDs friends has a much older father (late 60s) and last time i dropped her off he spoke to me about turkeys voting for christmas and how reform is the only answer and going on and on about offensive things I shouldn’t write down. Since he retired he spends the day on Tik tok news.
My own parents (late 60s and late 70s) are liberals and although they’ve got more set in their ways in other areas, routines, food etc, their political/social views have not changed.

Don't talk crap. Did you mean to be so rude? I wasn’t talking about you getting swept up in anything.
I was responding to the post that I highlighted to say it isn’t about age, it’s across the board.
Now if you don’t mind, focus on posts where people are replying to you before making it about yourself.

Yes, but people don’t generally make every conversation about their children or football. My parents are pretty much incapable of having any conversation that doesn’t relate to one of their talking points. Every time I attempt to change the subject, they manage to make the conversation about immigrants or benefits or the NHS again.

that poster has already tried to derail the support thread I set up.... 😥

If anyone else fancies engaging to keep it on track and ignore bad faith posters you are welcome!....

I'm mid 60s and still working - I can't be in a minority there as the state pension age remains one deciding factor for most people retiring and the others seem to be workplace retirement set age and/or how much older your partner is and if you can bear to be with them a lot more in the daytime. I have Gen Z DC and we are frequently horrified by right wing views of 40 and 50 somethings we know. Most friends in their 60s are united by fairly liberal views and a loathing of being called 'Boomers' and treated as if we have had some sort of easy life with cheap property prices and low mortgages.

Can you be straight with them, it is sad that they will let political issues destroy their relationship with you. If they knew that they were destroying the relationship would they stop? It’s time to say that you won’t be visiting them unless they can manage to keep politics and negativity out of the conversation.

If they watch GB news that will stir up a lot of hate.

My husband and I are mid 60s but don’t watch GB news, we aren’t Reform voters and don’t go on about immigration etc as I think it is all blown out of proportion by the media. We also don’t moan about the economy or the NHS.

we do lead busy lives though as we travel a lot, help out with grandchildren and have hobbies and friends. We watch BBC or ITV news at 6pm and that is it. Sounds like your parents have too much time on their hands.