To increase this clients charge ?

[Boomboomi]

I have a very awkward situation . I am a cleaner and I took on a lady a year ago who had a difficult situation.
I also look after her cat when I am when she is away and there is an agreement that I care for the cat as she knows me

At the time for my own reasons and her then limited financial situation - single parent , I agreed to work for her add hoc for way below my charge.

We have become friendly.

With the cost of living and I said that I would need to nominally put my price sessions up , but that they would still remain below the going rate , v significantly

This appeared to have caused upset on a personal level for which I am sorry
She has said things like ‘ I thought we were friends, and that she struggles with money Although I know that she works hard she does not have what I would see as a frugal lifestyle as she does go out for meals , has nails done regularly, etc.

I think that I have ‘ offended’ her and she has indicated that I am less of a friend but being transactional.

I absolutely see that lines between business and friendship have been blurred .I have tried to say that my need to increase the charge slightly in no way means that I care less for her or her pet - the latter being the crux of the matter as I have agreed to care for him in her will .

was i bu? And any advice?
My plan is to keep repeating that I genuinely care for her pet but also need to earn .
( Every session I do means that i get paid less than my normal wage - this will continue with the increase- but I would just earn a little more to make it more manageable).

I would step away from the whole arrangement.

She's making a mug out of you, and shown that she doesn't give a shit by her reaction to you increasing your prices.

Write an email terminating the contract and then block her on everything.

Would you be easily available to find new clients who'd pay the going rate? If so then I'd stop working for this woman. It's completely unfair of her to think you should work for a lower rate.

ChopSueyCharcuterieBoard
One of the issues is the pet is now in her will - that I will look after him .
That feels so awkward. Am also attached to him .

Oh
Sorry posted too early. What a pain that she's BU. I'm friends with my hairdresser but she still charges me £50 for a cut, and if I couldn't pay I bet she'd tell me to go somewhere cheaper because she's the best and is full up.
I would keep her as a friend and still look after the cat, but tell her you're going for high-end clients who pay top dollar because you need the money, and because you can.

Stop working for her and find a client who can pay the going rate. Tell her you value her as a friend and mixing business with pleasure isn’t working. She’ll probably not be happy but it’s a polite way to extricate yourself from the situation. She’s not a good person to expect you to work for her for less than the going rate.

tbh she is taking advantage of you. If she was that strapped for cash she couldnt afford to employ a cleaner in the first place.

She must know she is taking the piss. If she’s so hard up, where is she going away to all the time when you care for her cat? Even if you were best mates forever and gave her a slight discount, with COL that rate would go up anyway. Did you share with her what your new going rate is, compared to her rate, and what percentage discount she’ll be getting?

I would drop her as a client. Tell her unfortunately the lines between business and friendship is to blurred and it cannot continue.

You can carry on looking after the cat as a friend, but not doing her cleaning as a friend, I don't clean my friend's house, but I would feed their cat. Either she can afford a cleaner or she does it herself.

Did she ask you before doing that? That's very odd.

Of course you're not unreasonable! Putting the cat in her will is just emotional blackmail.

Tell her what your new rate is - it needs to make financial sense for you - and if the doesn't want to pay, walk away. She really isn't a friend.

She's taking advantage. If she can afford meals out she can afford to pay you the going rate. It's up to her what she does about the cat in the will. Likely the cat will die before her? Or is her difficult situation the fact that she's terminally ill. If so then obviously I would tread more gently but I would still likely end the arrangement if she won't pay a more reasonable rate.

If she was a friend she would understand you need to work to live. You can’t pay your bills with “friendship”.

TFImBackIn

Yes - am snowed under , but she was one of my first clients and has said she supported me when I was new to this.
Indicating a wish for loyalty? Which I do feel.

The thing is she has a much more extravagant lifestyle than I do in several ways , but she works extremely hard also to do so .

She says she will struggle to afford it and had used word like keeping the roof over her head ( heat of thr moment- ?as personally Id cut down nail care etc first , but we all have different priorities)

She says she will pay the extra £5 ( still way below my block charge ) but seems very upset and says she has been crying as she thought we were friends not transactional .
Id never deliberately cause hurt .
Its the emotional aspect I am struggling with as I feel guilt but am also aware how awkward this is and that orher factors may be at play.

I feel its my own fault for accepting the reduction initially . She clearly didnt see this coming.

She sounds like a right drama llama. Keeping a roof over her head? You’re not repossessing her house ffs.

Did you share with her what your new going rate is, compared to her rate, and what percentage discount she’ll be getting?

yes absolutely!
Its substantially less .

Or the trips that op needs to catch sit for!

One of the issues is the pet is now in her will - that I will look after him .
That feels so awkward. Am also attached to him .
Did she ask you before doing that? That's very odd.

She just said it one day as her pet is v attached to me . To be honest I do love him, and I would do it out of love, but didn’t anticipate.

I'm not surprised she has no other friends who would look after her cat when she dies... And she won't provide you with any money in the will to look after him.

Bet she doesn't pay you the going rate as a catsitter either. It's £14-17 for a half hour visit here (I'm a catsitter).

Is the pet realistically going to outlive her? Seems quite an unusual thing to do unless it's something like a parrot or tortoise.

i feel very sorry for you - it's a horrible situation to be in, but from what you've read she does sound like someone who takes advantage of your good nature

being harsh, someone who says 'I won't be able to keep the roof over my head if I have to pay an additional 5 pounds for pet care' shouldn't have a pet as they can't properly afford it.

“Yes - you’re right it does feel transactional. Therefore, I’m going to step away from cleaning your house to preserve our friendship’

She is manipulating you.

ChopSueyCharcuterieBoard

I will she how she is in person as she is away atm .
I am wondering if the multiple texts that seemed very emotional, were a trigger reaction, and that she may have calmed.
Its just phrases like friendship thrown away over money , and also I have no choice but to pay for the privilege .. just feels so difficult.
I hope that we are able to have a calm talk , but am aware that when people are feeling emotional, it can complicate matters.
What hurts for me is that I have done this happliy but now need to charge a bit more for my own life which the other way round I would understand.
She has implied I have really upset her, and made our friendship now transactional.
I just wanted a small amount more , well below my normal rates and thought that that would be understandable.

It has occurred to me to me that she may feel in some way threatened by my huge increase in work , that this is a threat to her in some way. It certainly affects my availability.
I have repeatedly said that her pet will not be forgotten and this stipl represents a significant discount.
I am dreading the conversation face to face .

She's manipulating you, drop her as a client and if you like her as a friend keep her as a friend only. Do not do anymore cleaning for her.

Forget about the cat. There are so many ifs that it isn't worth much thought. If she has actually written that in her will, if the cat is still around when she dies, if she doesn't change the will at some point.

As she's been paying you to do her cleaning, it has always been transactional. And it should be because that is your job. She is really trying to manipulate you by muddling your work with the friendship. But even if you suspended that bit of reality for the moment and say you clean her home and care for her cat out of friendship what is she doing of equal effort and commitment for you to show her appreciation.

You've been kind and understanding of her situation whereas she has no concern for yours. That isn't how friendship works.