AIBU to be suspicious after finding a sealed card in his luggage?

[greatbigproblem]

So... My husband works away a lot. I mean really a lot. No particular reason to distrust him but at the end of the day I'm a realist and think complacency is unwise. Marriage not great but honestly it's probably more me that thinks that...
Anyway. Husband packing to go away. Stuff on bed. I picked up a music magazine that was lying in amongst the stuff and flicked through it. Inside, there was a red sealed greetings card. This has got my spidey sensing tingling because this man doesn't send anyone - other than me - cards EVER. I do all that stuff.
I don't know what to do: ask him about it? But I run the risk of him being defensive and if he really doesn't want me to see the contents of the envelope then I suspect he will accuse me of snooping and I'd have to escalate massively to see the contents. If that happened then yes you could say that would be all I'd need to know but I feel I'd want something concrete to base turning our lives upside down upon.

What I have actually done is remove it to give myself time. I figure if it's current and important he'll worry where it's gone but he'll have to ask ME about it.

I COULD find an envelope same size and colour and open and reseal. Probably don't have time to do that today and he's leaving tomorrow.

I'm mainly a lurker but I've seen other people get good advice on here so... What do we think?
To be clear I am very chill about him being away all the time and never give a second thought to where he is or what he's up to. But this has kind of freaked me out and I have a weird feeling about it.

Baffling you won’t open today. Isn’t Tod not knowing driving you mad?

Quite hard to picture a scenario where you find what looks like a valentine's card in your husband's stuff and don't open it because you have DIY jobs that need doing.

OP is asking us, she can make the choice!

Has everyone forgotten that you steam envelopes open?

Look this is going to come out all judgy, but..

You do realise that is abusive behaviour right? Opening and destroying your partner's post "no matter what it says" is straight up controlling.

Honestly my sister is in a coercive controlling relationship and this is what her husband does. We send her a card or present, she doesn't mention, after a bit we ask... she has no idea.... then she'll say in a harassed way "oh P says he thinks maybe he opened it by mistake and didn't know what it was so he threw it away, sorry".

I opened it!!! Oh my God I feel like such an idiot!!! It was an old valentine's card from me!!!

Intrigued, I just did an AI-assisted search, as to whether any current UK music mags have either a freebie/giveaway or a marketing insert in a red envelope.
The answer was 'no' on both counts. Plus various reasons why it wouldn't be either of those two options.
And it referenced this thread!
I really want to know the answer now...

😂 tit

Agree. Open the bloody thing!! It must be driving you around the twist not knowing 😱

But why was it sealed then?

Sealed in the envelope without a name written on it? Tucked into a magazine that he packed to take away?
im glad your mystery is solved but mine is just starting 😂

This!

"Sealed in the envelope without a name written on it? Tucked into a magazine that he packed to take away?"

Quite. This is an absolute pile of bilge isn't it.
Another bollox thread.

Why was it unopened 😆. Strange but good news!

Hurrah!! So glad it was nothing more than that. It does sound like you are due some conversations about what could be improved in your marriage sometime soon, and your worries about what this could have potentially been highlight that (and your own reflections) but for now you can rest easy 😊

When I gently tried to peel it open it kind of came away - obvs resealed by having been between the pages of a magazine!

That well known method of resealing envelopes. Sigh.

and you hasn’t written anything on the envelope?!

Erm, so the magazine has been sitting around since February?

You should still learn to DIY yourself

Oh give over. If you really think a suspicious wife opening what she believes is evidence of an affair in a one off event is abusive then I don’t know what to tell you. It just totally trivialises the word and is not remotely comparable to the pattern of behaviour you describe, with flipped genders.

Yes we do definitely have some stuff to address but it kind of makes me laugh a bit when some people post on threads like this as if the OP is the ONLY person in the entire country who is in a less than perfect marriage! (Not you Skatefordinner).
So many reasons why people have to or choose to stay...
But it definitely makes me happy that today and tomorrow can be peaceful and we get to kick the can of a less than perfect marriage down the road to be looked at another day!!!